When cats experiment on humans

I've come to realize that I'm just a test subject for my cats. Here are some of the experiments they've performed lately:

How many of us can pile on top of her and next to her while she's sleeping? (Seven is the highest total so far).

If I lie on top of her and lick under her chin, will she get up and feed me? (Katie's specialty)

If we meow really loud while she's opening the cans, will we get our food faster?

If we run to the window and stare outside, can we fool her into believing there's something out there?

If I stand in the kitchen and yowl, will she come check to see what's wrong (at which point I run into the living room, mission accomplished)? (That's Angel)

How long will she put up with having me sprawled across her lap and the keyboard before she decides she really has to get some work done? (Kacey)

If I purr really loud and look adorable while I'm doing it, can I get by with chewing her toes? (Bob)

Can I get her to rub my big white belly just by rolling over on my back when she walks by? (Hagrid)

Can I get her to feed me by just staring at my food dish?

Can I get her to turn the water on for a drink by jumping in the bathtub?

Quote:

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Originally posted by catland
Can I get her to turn the water on for a drink by jumping in the bathtub?

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AHHHHHH!!!! Zam has me trained to do this!!! :eek: :o :D

She'll even yowl on occasion in case I pass by and don't see her. :rolleyes:

How long do I have to stare at her when I sit in the bathtub until she figures out I want water? (Filou)

Can she take from my angry meow whether I want food, play or a clean litterbox? (Tigris).

This is a fun thread:D

How good are my dad's reflexes when I dart for the open door?

When my hooman comes home from work how long will she stand for my loud agressive meows before she feeds me? Time so far: 20 min.

When she's taking a shower, I get on my back and wait for her to step out. How long will it take for her to get the message not to step over me, but to bend down and give me the tummy rub I deserve??

How long do I have to stare at the back of her head before she turns around?

How many times will she allow me to climb up her bare legs while she's trying to type, before she locks me in the dog's crate?

How long do I have to run my claws down the screen door before mommy will come outside so I can sneeze on her? Tucker and let me tell you...her sneezes STINK !!!

If I sit in the sink how long will it take daddy to figure out I want a back rub? Mystic

If daddy opens the bread bag, how long will it take for him to realize I did the 50 yard dash in 1.2 seconds and I'm sitting at the back door? Mystic

Will mommy wake up if I put my freshly stepped in the litter box paw over her nose? Abner

Will mommy get mad if I have a slug on my tail and it happens to fall off on the stairs and she steps on it? Abner

How fast will daddy get up from his chair if I run 6 laps around the house and then hang upside down from the door jam and then drag my claws down the trim? Tigger

How many pounds of cat can daddy's chest handle? Smokey 17 lbs.

How fast will mommy or daddy move if I bring a live animal in the house? Has not happened yet, but they keep trying.

How long will I allow myself to be brushed before my human runs into my teeth?

How many times must I pull the blinds cord, play with the rattling ball, jump on things that make noise, etc. before she wakes up at 3 am?

How long will meowmee stand there with the door open (especially in bad weather) while I wait to decide if I want in - or out.

Speckles:
How long will it take for my hooman to realize that I like puking on the rug instead of on a piece of paper that she shoves in front of me???

Oh, and I can't forget this one:

How stinky does a poop have to be in order to get her to clean the litter box immediately!

How many times can I knock over her salads out of her hand before she relizes that she is suppose to give me some before she sits down to eat?

Quote:

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Originally posted by CatsinDenver
Oh, and I can't forget this one:

How stinky does a poop have to be in order to get her to clean the litter box immediately!

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aha, weapons of mass destruction!!!


How many 'meowing decibels' can the sleeping human ear take before it awakens?


:rolleyes:

Tubby's favorite experiment is on Peanut, not a human, but is of the same general theory so here goes.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie pop....eerrr...oops, almost. How 'bout this one. How many licks does it take before Peanut hawls off and swats me one? And along the same line, how many times must Peanut swat me before the humans step in and yell at me to leave her alone?

:D

RUTHERFORD: When I lie here belly up.....you WILL pet me
FERN: When I "squeek" you WILL pet me
JASPER: when I crawl up your leg you WILL pet me

oh, you get the idea. :rolleyes:

Wait, Lucas DOES have an experiment going..........

How many times do I need to lick mama's nose before she gets up for my breakfast?

Mango-Peaches-Bubbles tricks:

How loud do I have to purr to awaken you in the morning? [Mango]

If that doesn't work, if I gently tap you on the forearm, will that awaken you? [Mango]

How about if I trample across the pillows (and your head) while purring? Will that wake you? [Mango]

If I bite your nose, will that awaken you? [Peaches]

If we are playing chase at 3:00 AM, you don't mind if we race across the pillows and nightstands while you're asleep? [All three]

How many times will you say "No Juni" before you get tired and let me do it?

How many times will you toss the toys from the bed, only to have them return in our mouth - for you Mommie? (both cats)


How many bites on the nose does it take to get you awake in the morning? (Juni)

How many flies can I eat before I puke? (Juni)

Quote:

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Originally posted by sasvermont
How many flies can I eat before I puke? (Juni)

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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!

quote:
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Originally posted by sasvermont
How many flies can I eat before I puke? (Juni)
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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!


DITTO!!!

How many times do I have to play the blinds like a harp in the morning to get these humans to wake up and feed me?
Trevor

Lovable
How many times do I have to run down to the bottom of the stairs and sit in front of the door and meow before mommy takes me outside?

How long do I have to bite my mommy’s toes (hands, arms, legs) before she will bring my fishing toy with the feather out for me to play?

How many times will she fall for the loud MEOW and pathetic look, which is me begging for a trip outside on my leash, only to desperately want back in 3 milliseconds later!

LOL Great thread. :D

How many times do I have to meow in her ear before she'll wake up and feed me?Sunny

How long do I have to meow before she'll feed me? Sky

How many times do I need to chase Cirrus under the bed or in the bathroom before I get yelled at? Storm

If I meow the loudest will I get fed first? Cirrus

How many times can I get away with jumping up on or lying on the dining room table? Sunny and Storm

How many times do I have to knock things off the table for her to realize that is my spot and to put her books some place else.

How many times will it take her to throw me off the kitchen table before she just gives in.

How many times can I pick the worce possible time to want some loving. She in the bath room...time for some loving. She paying the bills...time for loving. She making dinner...I want loving now!! Look she doing nothing now and wants to love on me....I'm not in the mood now, leave me alone.

How many times do I have to head-but him really hard on the nose before he wakes up? (ouch, that HURTS!) :mad: :mad: :mad:

… and how much longer can he sleep if I sit with my bum in his face?

How many times can I meow before mommy will turn around in her computer chair to reach out and pet me, before I get mad and go lay down out of her reach?

He does that all day long.

How many times must we knock over the lamp before mommy will actually get up and feed us? ~Zam and Logan (they take turns :rolleyes: )

How many times do I have to circle a cat allergic and then rub my face at his leg until he leaves?!

This was done by Nellie, when once one of our friends visited us for the first (and unfortunately last) time...there was a real crowd at our house that night and however Nellie managed to pick the only one with an allergy...our friend left after half an hour and was ill for three days...:rolleyes:

will our daddy recognize all the different MEEEEIOOUWS! Treats , Food , Toys or I want some ATTENTION!NOOOOOOOOW!

How many birds must I bring in to show be for a I get a good kitty? Winky
How many birds do I let lose be for she yells at me? Ebony
How much rubbung will Merlin take before he chases us? Winky and Ebony

After mommy (or daddy) gets our mousies from under the couch, chair, stove.... how long will it take us to shove them back under there and watch her (him) get them out again??
So far....less than five minutes.

Gee... we thought under the couch, refrigerator or stove was where they belong. Besides, it's more fun to bat at them when they are just out of reach.

how many scratches on the couch can i get before Dad jumps up and chases me with the squirt bottle?

Smokey's experiment last night was....

If I walk up her back, sit down on mommy's neck, put my bum in her face and make "dough" on her back....how long before she gets up to feed me?

Let's just say....not very long. Then after he ate, he followed me upstairs to the bathroom, where I picked him up to find that he was all wet on his back end. It seems that he decided to sit in his sister's (Mystic's) food dish, and get her Whiskers Pate all over his back end. I then of course smelled like Pate Turkey and got a bath from Abner.

My dad likes puzzles so

:eek:



bleeeeeechhhh!


Can he figure out what I just threw up?

How fast can i get to the computer printer when daddy wants to print something? When I drag my toys through the house will someone play?? Will they get the hint that I am hungry if I put food in their shoes??