Dear Tabby Advice Column

Dear Tabby,

I need help. I thought I had a wonderful life. I was adopted about 6 years ago by a nice couple. I live in a house with lots of soft places to sleep and a fenced backyard with lots of critters to watch (and chase occasionally!) I am well fed and I THOUGHT, well loved. The only wrinkle in my life until recently was periodic visits from my canine cousins. I had learned to cope, trained them to be respectful.

Then it happened…a boy cat appeared in my house. Long legged, big-earred, pink-nosed. He talks ALL the time. He has been in my basement since he arrived and I make darn sure he stays there! My poppa seems to be especially crazy about him and calls to him and ask him to come upstairs where I live.

I HATE him (the boy cat, not my poppa!) My furless ones tell me he can be a friend for me. I already have plenty of male attention ---JJJ3, Butter(cup), Moo, Tigris, Fister, Mishu. Why do I need any more????

Please Tabby, what can I do to make him go away????

Frustratedly,

Edwina

p.s. Why does my poppa keep saying I am a female dog???

Dear Edwina,

Your furless ones have a good point. The boy cat can be your friend. After all, have your furless ones ever licked the top of your head for you? Wouldn't it be nice to have a fellow furball to snuggle up against on those frosty Chicago nights?

Think about it, dear.

Sincerely,
Tabby

Dear Edwina,

I feel your pain. Since you seem to have an affinity for that awful boy that lives in this house, Butter, would you mind switching?? I think I would much prefer Eduardo to Butter, and better yet, maybe you could have both, then they could entertain each other and I could be left out completely! I would suggest that your human send Eduardo to my mom, and I'll come up there with you, but I don't think that would go over very well, and I would definitely miss my human girl, Helen, who spoils me rotten.

I will think hard on what you should do. In the meantime, I guess you have to at least try to get along with that boy cat that talks alot. What in the world do our parents see in them??? I'll never understand.

I hope Miley will reply to you too, as she is struggling with the same things right now!

Your concerned friend,
Mimi

Dear Miss Edwina:
I know just what you are going through. Nine years ago, my Mommy met this hairless man and he moved in with me and my Mommy. This man had a boy cat named Max and I hated him from the word get-go! I tried and tried to get him removed but my Mommy kept telling us to try to get along. Well, 6 years ago my Mommy and Daddy gave me and Max to someone else and now my current Mommy keeps saying the same thing! I still hate Max but I've learned to ignore him. You already know you are the princess of the house so you don't need to sink to his level by fighting. Just go about your business and pretend he is not there. Soon he will get the message and you two will eventually co-habitate without too much trouble.
Signed,
Speckles the Tabby
PS: As a word of warning, keep your eyes on your turkey treats!

Dearest Lady Edwina,

I also think your humans should just be fine and content to share the living quarters of one of the most adorable cat ladies here.

But from my own experience I can tell humans are crazy. One cat is not enough for them. They want different ones. And this is why I have to share my apartment not only with 2 humans but also with a crazy, nervous and talkative boy who will be a child furrever.

May I suggest that we could found an adult cat community at a nice place in which we can live in peace.

Tigris

Dear Edwina:

You are still loved very much. You have to realize that your furless ones spent time with you when they adopted you, to make sure you were comfortable and liked your new home.
Well now they have to make sure that the new boy cat is comfortable, so they have to spend a little more attention to him.
Also, you can never have enough male attention. So buckle up sweetheart and give the new guy a chance. Who knows, he just might land up being your best friend.

Sincerely
Tabby

I am jelous!

I wold love to hav a boy kat around to play wif! And for cudles and scritchies and other stufs! Can u send Eduardo here? I wold love him to peeces!

love your friend

Pixel

Edwina , I used to feel that way too. after all I hvae to share my house with 12 other Cats! and there are more strays outside , waiting for food and love. I was mad , but after I talked to the new Cats i raelized that I was so Lucky to have a Good Home and to share what I have with cats who are not so fortunate! My Dad is a bit of a dope , but a kind hearted one who gives us a safe place in a cold world!Give Eduardo a chance , JJJ3 , your special friend.

Dear Edwina,

I can understand your initial dismay at finding that there is an 'intruder' in your basement. I was "King Cat" around here for 3 years until the day that Andy was brought home as a wee 1 lb. kitten. You think you have troubles???!!! Be glad the furless ones didn't bring home a kitten! Oh how well I remember those stressful days. He was always pestering me and just getting into anything and everything around here! I do believe one of those might have just sent you over the edge! :eek:

We all know that a fine lady such as yourself needs her beauty sleep and I do feel that Eduardo is a much more suitable companion. He is sooo mature and handsome and, as CatsinDenver pointed out, won't it be nice to have someone to groom those hard to reach areas? These days I really can't imagine what I would do without Andy. Of course I worked hard to shape him into the cat he is today. I am sure you will be able to do the same with Eduardo. He will be putty in your paws. What cat wouldn't? :cool:

Sincerely,
Trevor (The Tabby)

Dearest Edwina;
I too feel your pain. I used to be queen of the house and then my meowmee's daughter moved in with her
hyper, bratty furboy whom I just HATE. By the way I see you mentioned his name - Mishka. Do you want
him? He's a real pain in my furry butt. He constantly chases me and jumps on me. And the when he gets all cute and cuddly they all fuss over him and ask me "how come you're not sweet like him Lucy". Unbelievable!!
And to top things off I just overheard that I will be getting ONE MORE bratty brother.
I've been plotting my escape - and actually have managed to get out a few times. But then, I got hungry....and strangely enough found myself missing the gray furball. Actually even though I hate him, lately I find myself in the same room as him more and more often. Hmnnnn.
Ok, maybe he's not so bad.
But don't tell anyone I said that.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/...7/fc64cd4d.jpg


Now that I think about it - what is YOUR relationship with MY Mishka?
~ Lucy the Tabby

Dear Edwina,
Your humans still love you very, very much but you must keep in mind that there are other kitties in this world that do not have the life that you have. Some kitties are out on the streets to fend for themselves and others come from wonderful homes but their humans either can not care for them anymore and send them to a shelter or when they move just leave them behind. It really is sad that all kitties can not be cared for as much as you are.

While you may never get used to a new boy kitty you should at least try to tolerate his presence.

If I were you, I would make this boy kitty your friend. You never know when you could use a hug, a kiss, or a good snuggling.

Sincerely, Tabby Cat

Dear Edwina,

I can relate to your dislike of the boy cat. At Christmas my meowmie brought home a tiny ball of orange fur and said that I needed a little brother. This little brother, Tanner, is now bigger than I am and he picks on me all the time. Then she figured that one brother wasn't enough ... she brought home TWO more boy cats. These ones are a little different because their daddy-cat is in the army and he can't take them with him to some place called Iraq(??). She says that they will only be here for a little while, but these guys are BIG.

I have been trying really hard to ignore them, which is what you should do. I am still her little girl and "queen" of the house and I let her know that every morning. Things MUST be done exactly how I like them, not how all the boys want. But the good thing is that Tanner now leaves me alone and tries to play with the other boys ;) and I get alot more treats :D

So sometimes there are good things that came come with boy cats ... but you have to tell the furless ones that you are still their princess.

Signed

Emily (the Tabby Cat)

Dear Edwina,
You think YOU have it bad. Think about ME!!!!!!!!! I have to share everything with 12, count them, 12 others cats. And I hate each and every one of them. (And believe you me, I tell them in no uncertain terms any time they try to have contact with me) MEOWRRRRRRRRR But alas, the hairless ones still treat me with love and kindness and try their hardest to make me happy. So I try not to complain TOO much. Good luck.
Sincerely,
Fern

Just wondering, has the copious amount of advice help solve your problem? :)

Dear Tabby,

I have been trying to apply all the advise I received but it is DIFFICULT. Eduardo seems to think he can go ANYWHERE he wants in MY house! I even caught him in MY BOUDOIR!!!

And his table manners...:eek: :mad: :eek: He wolfs down his food and then he watches me daintily eat mine. Last night he had his turkey on the floor and then jumped up on the table where I was dining. I was so distressed I couldn't finish my dinner.

However, I felt strangely mellow yesterday. We even did nose touches. I don't know what came over me. I have the same feeling today.

If he won't go away, can he at least understand that I am Numero Uno, the Boss, the Queen???????

With resignation,

Winny

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
However, I felt strangely mellow yesterday. We even did nose touches. I don't know what came over me. I have the same feeling today.

If he won't go away, can he at least understand that I am Numero Uno, the Boss, the Queen???????

---

Oh my, Edwina, darling! How did my mom ever miss this thread? This is Peanut here, and I know exactly what you're going through. The only difference in our situations is that my brother was here first, so he seems to think he has the right to be #1. I've learned to let him think that, but we all know that I'm queenie around here.

Brothers aren't soooo bad. I've trained Tubby so for the most part, he leaves me alone - knows better than to mess with me. And I also think it's nice to have a good head licking now and then, but the problem with these darn brothers is that they just don't know when to quit! He just keeps licking and licking and licking, so I have to swat him one to let him know that's enough. He doesn't like it at all when I swat him, but you think he'd have learned by now that if he continues to lick, this is what's going to happen. Brothers. :rolleyes:

And sometimes, when I'm feeling playful, it's nice having a brother around to terrorize - especially when he doesn't feel like playing. (teeheehee) :D

I think it's good that you're feeling mellower these days, although it sounds like he still needs some training. If he tries to take over your treats, a good swat session is definitely in order. My brother tries to do that all the time, but thankfully my mom knows that so she waits until I'm completely done before she leaves so she keeps Tubby away so I can concentrate on my treats.

And I have to admit that even though I would never admit that I actually like my brother (much less love him :rolleyes: ), when I hear him in distress (he throws up sometimes and makes some awful noises) I do have to go check on him to make sure he's ok. Don't tell anybody I said this, but after 14 years of putting up with him, I might actually miss him if he wasn't around.

So don't fret by dear Winny. Hang in there a little while longer and he will soon learn that you are the one and only boss in your house, and then you can just go back to ignoring him and life will be nice and peaceful again.

Good luck, my friend,
Peanut

Dear Edwina,
you know how men are:
without manners, unkempt, always hungry, lonely wolves.

This may not change unless there is a woman that gives a meaning to their live. If you look at human teenage boys: they don't start to wash their hands or to use fork and knife in the right way before they become interested in the other sex.

I think it is very heroic of you to rub noses with Eduardo but I am sure your heroism will be rewarded. And -just among us- could it be it was a little fun too;)

Yours sincerely
Aby Tabby

P.S. What exactly did you mean when you hoped you would be the only queen:confused: :confused:
Any doubts about Eduardo:eek: :rolleyes: :eek:

Dear Edwina,

I do know how you're feeling. Despite sharing a small apartment with a *DOG*, my life was great. Then momma brought in one of my long lost sons. Well let me tell you, when a kid leaves a nest, they should stay gone! :mad:

He knew his place though and I did my best to remind him even if he needed reminding or not.

Momma said I was not very nice, but I didn't care.

But after awhile, I realized that he wasn't so bad. He can clean those hard to reach places on my back..(I'm a feline of modest size you know. :rolleyes: ) and so even though he's a bit runty, I return the favor.

Don't mind Edwardo's table manners. He is only a boy after all. ;)

Best of luck to you.

Purrs and headbumpies,
Zam