Thinking it's the end for Honeybun: 11:30AM Friday time/day set

I've been dealing with a lot with Honeybun lately. He's seeming very out of sorts, almost senile in his ways. He's not using the litter boxes at all, he's totally destroyed my on part of my hardwood floor because of it, and it's just so frustrating. I've tried crating, and he cries and still won't use the box at all. He's only eating chicken, and his poops are just black and runny. It's just not looking good for him at this moment.


I think that when I get paid in 2 weeks I am going to put him to sleep. He seems miserable, looks miserable, and I'm miserable. I think it's going to be the fairest thing for him at this point. I've added up the years I've had him, and when I got him and realized he's almost 20 years old! I know they can live longer, but he's just so emaciated looking and his eyes just lack that luster and love.

I've finally wrapped my head around it, and I've stopped crying about it as much, but I guess I just want to know that I'm doing right by my boy. Cancer has his mouth, FIV has his body... and I don't want him to suffer any longer.

You know your cat better than anybody else, and you know when it's time. It does sound like you are making the right decision for Honeybun. Amber was in a similar situation when I decided to have her PTS - she kept losing weight no matter how much I fed her, she was senile, she had kidney disease and mouth cancer. I knew had given up the fight and was ready to move on. I just saw it in her eyes.

I will pray that you are making the right decision and that you can find some semblance of peace in that. I will also pray that the next 2 weeks will be happy ones for you and Honeybun. Lots of love being sent your way. :love::love::love::love:

You know it's time. I'm so sorry it has to be this way. Love to you and Honeybun.:love:

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Originally Posted by jenn_librarian

I guess I just want to know that I'm doing right by my boy. Cancer has his mouth, FIV has his body... and I don't want him to suffer any longer.

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I think if you feel that it is, then it is. All I have to go by is my own single experience, and how I felt.

The first appointment I made to have Limpet euthanised, I really intended to do it because I had been talking to the vet and it really seemed like the 'moment' had come (I asked her what I should watch for as the signs of 'the time' and she said with kidney failure it was usually when the cat stopped eating, which she had). I thought it over all night, made the appointment in the morning for the end of the day, and had the whole day to think about it. As I say, it really seemed like the right thing to do. But as the day wore on I just got more and more weighed down by dread - not of how we'd miss her or how we would lose her for good or anything like that. What I felt was fear, and guilt - towards her, like I was doing something to her that was wrong. It's true she wasn't eating, but she still seemed like all she really wanted from life was to be with us, and if I'd put her to sleep it would have been like shutting her away from us. So I couldn't do it. When we got to the vet's we consulted with her and made a last-minute one-eighty decision to try the IV treatment again.

I had none of that fear and dread when we did it for real about 10 days later. I was sad, sad, sad, and my son and I both cried steadily through the whole thing. I knew how much I would care, but I just didn't expect how it would make me cry. It hurt something awful. We both wanted so badly to still have her forever, our little velvet cat. My HANDS hurt with knowing I was losing that feeling of her fur under them. But it didn't feel wrong. In fact, the weird thing was that putting her to sleep hurt us AND helped the hurt. It was almost a feeling of 'I'm so sad I could curl up and cry for a year - but at least there is this one good thing in this.' That we were letting her go.

In spite of what our vet said about 'usually', I developed the sense with Limpet that the time would be there when she quit purring. Nothing could get her to eat for almost the entire last week we had her, but she did keep purring and she did want to be with us and have her laps. When she stopped purring and she got like you describe Honeybun - confused, haunted-looking, miserable even when we were there . . . that's when it was right. And I'm so thankful that we did get the opportunity to pick when was right, and do it then. No sooner, and no later either.

I wish I could say something useful to help how it feels. But I think you can trust yourself.

I am so sorry to hear about Honeybun. In our conversations at school, I could tell that you always loved Honeybun and that you always did everything in your power to help him. Princess will be waiting at the bridge for him. I will pray for you and as always, I think of you often.

So sorry to hear this, Jenn. It's never easy, and I have been down this road too. Is it time??? - am I holding on too long??? - am I giving up too soon??? Only you know what's best for Honeybun, since it is you that is with him day after day. It does sound like it's time tho, from what you say. And 20 years - I'd say that's darn good and is a tribute to the care and love that you have given him. My prayers are with you and Honeybun.

Jen, I'm sorry that it's come to this w/Honeybun but if you really think it's time, then two weeks is a long time to wait if he's that miserable. I can't imagine that your vet will expect you to pay right then and there. My vet waits a while, then sends a bill and maybe yours will, too. I don't want to cheat you of any time w/Honeybun but it does sound as though it's his time and you'd be doing your last act of kindness for him if you helped him to the Bridge sooner rather than later. :love:

Jenn I'm so sorry too hear this. It's never easy to let go, but some times it's the best that we can do. You will always have the memories. I still cry when I think of Patches, she been gone almost 9 years now.

Poor boy, and you have our sympathies as well.

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Originally Posted by Medusa

Jen, I'm sorry that it's come to this w/Honeybun but if you really think it's time, then two weeks is a long time to wait if he's that miserable. I can't imagine that your vet will expect you to pay right then and there. My vet waits a while, then sends a bill and maybe yours will, too. I don't want to cheat you of any time w/Honeybun but it does sound as though it's his time and you'd be doing your last act of kindness for him if you helped him to the Bridge sooner rather than later. :love:

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I agree. My vet also doesn't expect me to pay that day. They know how emotional people get and how hard it is to say goodbye so they just bill you.

I'm sorry to hear that he's not doing well:( and I know you want to spend some more time with him. When I noticed that my RB Sunny started to go downhill from his cancer, I called to see if my vet would be working the next day and the woman said that she would. I told her what was going on and she asked me if I wanted to make an appt. to bring him in to have him PTS. I said no that I would probably wait 1 week. The more I thought about it, the more I knew that it was time so I called and I left a voice mail with my vet to let her know that I would be bringing my Sunny in the next day. It is hard to know when it's time but from what you've said, I think that Honeybun is ready. Sending prayers your way during this difficult time. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

Jen - if Honeybun is having black stools, doesn't that mean he's bleeding high up in his digestive system?

I was devastated when I lost Dude, one of my FIV boys who developed oral cancer, and I still think about him with great sorrow because we only had a year together and he was a wonderful cat.

Your post makes his condition sound extremely bad. Perhaps others are right and the time should be sooner rather than later, for Honeybun's sake. When they get that inward looking look in their eyes I know I have to say goodbye very very soon.

I am so very sorry, Jenn.

Love and prayers and good wishes to you and Honeybun.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:,
Pat and cats

Poor Honeybun. He's miserable, you're miserable, it's a sad situation all around. Yes, it seems like it is his time. Know my thoughts are with you and Honeybun. It's hard to let them go when you've had them in your home and in your heart for years and years, but that is what love is all about.:love:

:( I so aggree.. Sending Lots of Prayers & Huggss..

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Originally Posted by Pinot's Mom

You know it's time. I'm so sorry it has to be this way. Love to you and Honeybun.:love:

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Oh Jennie, I am so sorry. I know how much Honeybun means to you, even with the frustration he causes sometimes. This just brings back the turmoil I went through with Taz. I couldn't wait two weeks and schedule an apointment. Luckily I had a recheck appointment and we decided to do it right then. For a long time, and even still to this day, I always wonder if I let him go too soon. But then I think....he was 21 1/2 lbs at his heaviest. When I let him go he was only 6.7lbs. It was the right thing to do.

Hugs to you Jennie. You know you are doing the right thing. Because it is so difficult makes it easy to second guess yourself.

I think the time is now, for Honeybun's sake, and I am just so sorry to say this.

I'm so sorry Jenn, it's never easy we all know. My thoughts are with you all.

Melissa

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Originally Posted by Lizzie

Jen - if Honeybun is having black stools, doesn't that mean he's bleeding high up in his digestive system?

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I had no idea that that's what black stools meant. It would make sense though, as the cancer might have spread. And maybe it's another reason why he doesn't make it to the litter box on time. Oh geeeez.... why didn't I think of this??? I'll be making that call soon. He looked horrible today when I was home. He did sleep next to me, and seemed to want comfort, which is not like him. He's normally a very solitary cat. Maybe that's his way of telling me he wants to go. :(

I'll update later on when things are done. I'll see if maybe my boyfriend can help me out with some funds. I just paid all my bills today, so I'm not left with much, but I know Dave knows how much Honey means to me, and he won't let him suffer either.

Thank you all for your support, it means a lot. He's my Bun Bun... I love him with all my heart, even when he frustrates me. I guess I just needed some reassurance that I was doing the right thing.

Jenn,
Thought about you all day. My thoughts are with you.:(

{{{{hugs}}}} Prayers going out for you and Honeybun.:love::love:

So sorry you've come to that fork in the road Jen. The last decision is the hardest we ever have to make regarding our beloved fur friends. But rest assured that when you make that decision it will be the right one and the best for Honeybun-- this is the greatest gift we can give them in the end for all the love and joy they have given us.

I'm so sorry to hear about Honeybun's illness. You have my prayers.

Decisions like this are never easy. In my case, with Max and Speckles, they both told me when they were ready and I pray that Merlin will do the same thing.

Go with the your heart and gut and listen to Bun Bun. When the decision is made it will hurt...no doubt about that, but it will be the best one for your sweet baby and Honeybun will be in a better place than we are.

Big hugs to you....

Came home from camp to keep an eye on my Bun Bun the rest of the week. Someone is throwing up profusely, and I don't know who it is. Hopefully this week at home will tell me.

He seems to be perky and in better spirits, but I don't know if that's just what I want to see or if he's really feeling a little better. Hoping to get funding together for the end of the week.... just not sure if it will be possible. Funding is so tight right now, and Dave just had to have his truck repaired and took out money he was supposed to be paid for a job to get it done, so I may have to wait until next week. I just don't know any other way. I hate to ask my parents for money to do this... they'll say it's my pet and my responsibility and they were against me adopting him in the first place cause he's FIV+.

SIGH. It will work out somehow. I trust that it will. Money will fall into place when I least expect it to. That's usually what happens.

I am going to call tomorrow to see how much euthanasia is for a cat at my vet's office, and if they will bill me for it because it really needs to be done. I'm hoping that they will work with me. Wish me luck!!

Oh, Jenn, I am so sorry you are going through all this. Prayers for Honeybun and you.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:

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Originally Posted by phesina

I am so very sorry, Jenn.

Love and prayers and good wishes to you and Honeybun.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:,
Pat and cats

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From here too,
Elyse :love: :love:

Just called, euthanasia for a cat of Honey's weight is only $25.00. I can do that later in the week. Right now I have 1.77 in my bank account, so that won't get me very far. I'm not going to cremate him, he's going to be buried with Finae up on my mom and dad's farm (and where all the rest of our animals are buried). So, I'm thinking Friday will be the day. :(

{{{hugs}}}

Wishing you and Honeybun a loving time and for Bun Bun to be as comfortable as possible.:love::love::love:

Jenn, I'm sorry to hear that he's near the end.:( Cherish the time you have left with him and I hope that his passing will be a peaceful one. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

Jen-

I'm so so sorry. If you need anything let us know. My prayers are with you and Honeybun.

Melissa

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Originally Posted by Medusa

Jen, I'm sorry that it's come to this w/Honeybun but if you really think it's time, then two weeks is a long time to wait if he's that miserable. I can't imagine that your vet will expect you to pay right then and there. My vet waits a while, then sends a bill and maybe yours will, too. I don't want to cheat you of any time w/Honeybun but it does sound as though it's his time and you'd be doing your last act of kindness for him if you helped him to the Bridge sooner rather than later. :love:

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I agree. Call your vet tomorrow morning and see what you can do. If its his time, 2 weeks is a long time to wait. I am glad to hear that your moving it up sooner. Black stools does mean that he is bleeding somewhere up there. See if you can bill it later if you can't afford it by then. If not ask your parents or other family.

We had the papers signed to put Tigger down but then we decided to wait a day, and he ended up passing on his own. Sometimes I wish that we would of done it while we were there so that we could of been there for his passing.

Friday, 11:30AM is our appointment time. :(:(

It's time. Although he's still fiesty, he's just not himself. He's at my side constantly, needing comfort, and just dry heaves. So, Dave is going to figure out a way to get me the $25 on Friday while he's working, and I can then take him to the vet and have him PTS. I have a neuro appt. at 7:30 am, not sure how long I'll be there, but hoping it's not too long. I'm hoping to find out what is causing my migraines or get something to help eliminate them, or find relief from them. So, my friday is a full day. Will be going up to my parents right after the vet and burying Honey by my Finae so he won't be alone. All of our family pets are buried up there.. we have a 100 acre farm so we have a plot just for the pets with rose bushes and pretty flowers for them.

I'm going alone to do this, so it will be hard, but Dave can't take off, and I wouldn't ask him to. Honey is my boy, and I will be there for him. I'm just sad I didn't know what the black stools meant, and that it's being going on longer than it should have. He's skin and bones at this point, had been 9lbs in the spring, but this summer he just went way down hill. My poor boy.

Think of us on Friday morning. Thank you all for your support and condolences.

God bless you, Jenn and Honeybun both.

Peace and comfort to you. Please give Honeybun some gentle kissies of love from us.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:,
Pat and cats

Jenn,
You are in my thoughts. I really miss our morning talks. I am so sorry about Honey Bun. We have Princess buried in our back yard next to Smokey. I feel that they are both looking at Butler and Bentley.

Jenn, prayers and hugs. It is never easy.

I am so sorry to hear about Honeybun. You are both in my prayers.

My thoughts are with you. *hugs*

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Originally Posted by jenn_librarian

Friday, 11:30AM is our appointment time. :(:(

It's time. Although he's still fiesty, he's just not himself. He's at my side constantly, needing comfort, and just dry heaves. . . I'm just sad I didn't know what the black stools meant, and that it's being going on longer than it should have. He's skin and bones at this point, had been 9lbs in the spring, but this summer he just went way down hill. My poor boy.
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He's still getting comfort from you. I don't want to take from your sadness or try and brush it away, but that is something not-bad about this extra time you both ended up with. You sound sure about it now and I do hope you're not worried anymore about whether it's the right thing. I'll be thinking of you.

I've been beside myself all day. My one "friend" on Facebook called me Jennie Kevorkian :eek: , because I'm doing assisted suicide for my pet. I was so upset with him, to make it sound so harsh and cruel. What kind of friend does that???

I'm totally for Kevorkian, by the way. I believe that all creatures deserve to have a humane and peaceful ending to their lives and not suffer. I'm just upset he made it sound so cruel.

I know I should just ignore him and the comment, but it just really got to me.