...help...

Right now I am just plain SCARED.

1. I live in one of two condo buildings. The Reserve Fund Study was just handed out. That just shows what repairs have to be done in the next few years - and they are major...two boilers, new roof being the biggies. We knew this was coming.

With the price increase in NG, and these repairs, the monthly condo/maint fees will go up an average of $200 per month. I pay $320 right now, and having a 2 bdrm means my increase will be above average.

I can't afford to live here if that is the case. There is a meeting on the 24th...I am suggesting either a Special Assessment - a one time payout for repairs - or peddling these 30 year old buildings to a developer and getting some form of payout.

My realtor - a good guy - thinks I should sell and get out NOW - so I am just trying to see what he and I can put together as far as another place to live...

2. I am a bag of nerves again...just really jittery. Though my present bosses are nice and fair people, I am reacting to my job the way I used to - getting more and more stressed and fearful until I get too sick to work any more.

I am taking today, and hopefully tomorrow, to work on these 'old tapes' so I can look forward to going to work. This long meltdown started over a week ago, and really crashed on Wednesday night...add one for Friday.

Just want good thoughts, and prayers, and everything, as I am telling myself I am loved, and a good and intelligent person - and I can be healthy and will be so starting now.

Using the Law of Attraction (God, etc) - I will be making a list of everything I want in life, and believing it is on its way to me. In addition, I will be replacing destructive thoughts with good ones.

I want to call my bosses and say I am trying to trade off tomorrow with the other gal (waiting for a call back) and I am terrified.

My mind has turned them into monsters...and they are not. My mind is confusing them with other bosses who have been...not healthy for me.

THANK YOU for listening.

C

Candace, you are always the "Rock of Pet Talk". Always stepping up to help others. I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through a bad time right now. I just wanted to offer my thoughts and prayers to you. I hope it all works out. Being scared is a terrible feeling.:( {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Remember we do this thing called life just One Day At a Time ;)

Candace,

You ARE a rock here on PT. You are always the one cheering everyone else on when they have problems.

Know that I am here for you, girl. I'm only a phone call away.

You'll be in my prayers.:love:

Prayers for YOU, Candace! Things will work out, one way or other. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

...wow...thanks so much - and I got a phone call too! :)

I really appreciate the support - it's hard for me to ask.

I do feel better now - ALMOST enough to go to work tomorrow... ;)

Gotta put myself first right now.

{{{hugs}}}

Candace, I concur w/what everyone else has said: you've been here for everyone else on PT and we'll be here for you. I'll light a special candle w/your name on it tonight that you'll be calm and peaceful. You know what to do, how to do it, and you'll get it done. :)

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through some tough times.:( Things will get better and we'll all be here for you for emotional support. Just remember that you now have friends from all over the world who care about you very much. Just relax, take a deep breath, and tell yourself that tomorrow will be a better day.:) You'll be in my thoughts and prayers. (((HUGS)))

Candace, loving thoughts from China for you; you are always so caring and helpful to everyone else on PT! We are all cheering for you to feel good and be happy and for a great outcome to your housing situation. Hang in there girl!

Having a potential threat to your living space is enough to throw anyone for a loop! But do you really think everyone else who lives there CAN make the monetary adjustment? Try to keep that in mind and work towards the meeting on the 24th; see what others are saying, feeling. Heck why wait, talk to some of them now!

Joy Shared is Joy Doubled; Trouble Shared is Trouble Halved.

If someone else had posted this, you would now be posting links and major threads with ideas, suggestions, and information for them. I only wish I had the creativity and search skills to do that for you. As that is mot my particular forte, you will have to accept cyber {{HUGS}}.

We're all here for you!!

Fear and projection suck :). The best thing I heard once was "I've had a million crisis' in my life and 2 of them actually happened".

Whatever happens, it and you will be ok :love:

Quote:

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I am telling myself I am loved, and a good and intelligent person - and I can be healthy and will be so starting now.

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The former you are - and the latter you fully will be.

Prayers and positive thoughts on the way.

More {{{{{HUGS}}}}} and prayers for you, Candace. I hope you're much better today.:)

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Originally Posted by RedHedd

Remember we do this thing called life just One Day At a Time ;)

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This is so true.:) I hope your realtor can work something out for you.
In the meantime, try to look at your "job time" as a temporary release
from your worries about the condo. It's not productive to worry 24/7.

Hope you hear better news soon.:)

Catty, sorry to hear you are going through such a fearful time right now, but I do agree with the others about you being the rock here. You were one of the first people I met by pm on here and I was always glad you cleared things up withme. So I'll be thinking of you throughout the night and day tomorrow. I know when the chips are down you will find the strength to rally to the challenge.

What really amazed me is the price you were paying for a 2 bedroom condo, out here this would be at least $900 and sometimes not all inclusive.

I know your real estate agent will give you his best advice and will help you through this rough spot.

Hi, everyone.

First - shepgirl, my mortgage for the condo is $569.00; the $320 maintenance fee is on top of that, so it is about $917.00. The taxes are inlcluded in the mortgage; heat and hot water in the fees (as well as snow removal, garbage pickup, etc). Electricity and cable TV are extra.

Sometime around 6 pm yesterday (Sunday), I found that "I" was back. That horrid distorted thinking that sat in my head like a steel cage and had me so horribly scared of everything had gone. WHEW!

I did some writing last night, and have been able to keep a good head on - today I even walked to a meeting and back, 15 minutes each way - it was a breakthrough as I haven't 'walked' in months.

Work today was ok...no panics on my part...I didn't come home all tense and stuff.

THANK YOU all for the support, and the phone call, and everything. I am working - like, homework! - on moving forward and REALLY taking care of myself. One day at a time.

OH - and I emailed my realtor and said "let's get me out of this place and find another one for me to live in"! :D

{{{{hugs}}}} to you all.

I could not agree more,Candace you always go that extra mile to help anyone out, you take the time to research things out and help people,you are amazing, i have often thought it and now want to say it, i am sorry you are having this troublesome and worrying time ahead of you, i am sending you giant hugs and positive vibes that everything will work out ok for you and you will be able to continue to live where you are, take care and all the best.:love::love:

Thanks, Carole, and to everyone.

I have called the mortgage broker my realtor recommended, and she and I are having a meeting on Friday afternoon. I'm just doing my homework and getting 'pre-approved'.

Out of the 12 units in my building, at least 6 are for sale...mine would be the 7th.

It will be interesting to see what the meeting about this on the 24th turns up. When I state my opinion that the building is not worth pouring all the money into - Alberta is an oil province. It goes through booms and busts. This building is one that was built during a "boom" around 1980. This means it was likely built in a hurry - and it was run down a bit when it became condos instead of apartments...and the first management company to have really let it slide, and spent money in inappropriate ways.

The new management company and the Board are really good...but this massive repair facing all of us just may not be feasible.

A homeowner might have to go into debt with a loan to replace a roof...but doing that will add some resale value to the home. Here - all the repairs would not increase the benefit to anyone, and would increase our costs tremendously. As it is...the main repairs, replacing two boilers and two roofs, will not even be completed for about 6 years. Worth waiting for? I can't afford to.

Thanks again folks.

{{{hugs}}}

Hi Candace,

I haven't been on PT much (work + life have taken over...especially work:rolleyes:) however, I just had to pop in and give you my best:) You are always so supportive of everyone here and now it's your turn to get some back.

Not sure where exactly you're located but Alberta living costs are outrageous at the moment - real estate being one of the major factors. Your situation and feelings are understandable and I sincerely hope a good solution is soon to be yours. Is location a big deal for you? Have you thought about moving to one of the smaller surrounding communities - would that work at all? A very dear friend of mine did just that and she is a much happier lady.

Please keep your chin up and all of us informed. A lot of good vibes here to keep you focused and get that problem solved!

Hugs:love:

Betty

Dear Candace, I'm so sorry you've been going through such a bad patch.

Just wanted to add our words and thoughts of encouragement and love.

{{{{{HUGS}}}}} and ~~~~~PURRS~~~~~,
Pat, Peony, Sydney, Poppy, Elmer, and Priscilla Angel

...wow...I am feeling so much warmth from this thread...it's SO nice...like a group hug! :)

Bengalz - my town USED to be a small community, but has grown a lot, being so near Calgary. There are good affordable places here - much of the town has kept its small-town feel, which is good. My chiropractor's receptionist and her hubby live in a townhouse complex that I was looking at. The places are affordable - and I get to have a garage! (And maybe an extra bedroom to foster a kitty or two! :D )

Anyway - first to get 'pre-approved', and go from there.

thank you, friends. :)

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Originally Posted by Catty1

...wow...I am feeling so much warmth from this thread...it's SO nice...like a group hug! :)

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http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/d...creek/Hugs.gif
GROUP HUG!!

I'm sorry I didn't see this thread until tonight. I tend to stay in the cat and dog section and forget that there are important things being posted in general!

I'm sorry that you are going through so much right now. It sounds very overwhelming and I can understand why you felt so scared. Your home is your safe zone, it's everybody's safe zone and when that is threatened, it's upsetting!

I think your plan to find a new place is a great idea. A new adventure awaits you! And, hopefully it will be a place that is more affordable and perfect for you and your fur family.

Please keep us updated with the latest. Praying that everything falls into place for you just as it should. It will!

p.s. it might feel good to make a 'vision board' and make that list of everything you want into images. Tear pics out of magazines along with any images and make a collage filled with what you want your life to be about. Look at it every day and believe. Dream big! You deserve it. You have been there for everyone on PT and you definitely have the support of everyone here as well. :)

Okay, now that I feel stupid for thinking you were paying so litle for a condo I have to say how glad I am that you took the bull by the horns and got yourself out of that misery hole you were in. Would have been too good to fing a place for so little I guess...
Glad you already found a new place and I'm sure you won't have trouble getting approved.
Come and knock some sense into me anytime...lol.

LOL shepgirl, no problem! I haven't found a place yet...the mortgage lady needs to tell me WHAT I can afford, if anything, and then we send my realtor to find me a home!

The meeting about all this is Tuesday night...some people own these condos and rent them out, so maybe they just raise the rent and it's ok - but I can't afford to rent this place out AND buy another one.

So...we'll see.:)

Wishing you all the best Candace, i hope it all works out well for you, thinking of you, keep us posted and updated won't you, HUGS.:love::love::love:

Sorry for not seeing this thread sooner....

Cheer up, dear Candace, I am sure there will be a good end to this! You deserve it!!
Big hug!!

LUT:love:

At these prices I would be doing some searching too, Isn't it the pits when rents go up by that much. Keeping my fingers crossed that you find something nice that agrees with your pocketbook...

Monday night, got home about 6:15...there was a message from the mortgage broker saying she had gone over the numbers and wanted to talk to me about a couple of things....so I left HER a message...phone tag.

Tomorrow night is the meeting on the Reserve Fund Study - all about this condo repairs and fee increase and stuff.

So, things will be clearer by Wednesday morning.

I had three meltdowns today...maybe I don't belong in an office...anyway, the benefits cover counselling, so will see if job counselling - as in, how to adjust, is part of the plan.

I'll keep you posted.

I'm just now catching up some here on PT. I'm sorry to hear of your struggles right now! Moving is stressful enough without feeling like it isn't really your choice! I hope you get some good news from your realtor!

I have part of my answer...I can afford several decent condos - all of which are ones for sale in my building! LOL

Thanks, Kim, after I was so awful to you. I hope you are better. How are all the moms and babies doing? When you're healed, and if you have time, it would be great to see another 'family gallery'.

I am looking into counselling as in the last two weeks, I am repeating a pattern that cost me my last two jobs(horrible as the bosses were). I am having more meltdowns/dissolving into sobs in the last two weeks. I cried for the first 20 minutes or so at work today.

HUGS to you all and thanks for caring.

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Originally Posted by Catty1

I have part of my answer...I can afford several decent condos - all of which are ones for sale in my building! LOL

Thanks, Kim, after I was so awful to you. I hope you are better. How are all the moms and babies doing? When you're healed, and if you have time, it would be great to see another 'family gallery'.

I am looking into counselling as in the last two weeks, I am repeating a pattern that cost me my last two jobs(horrible as the bosses were). I am having more meltdowns/dissolving into sobs in the last two weeks. I cried for the first 20 minutes or so at work today.

HUGS to you all and thanks for caring.

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Candace, I am fine and no hard feelings toward you!;) Coming from one with my own "issues", I do hope you will get the help you need before you get to a very low place! It sounds like you are catching yourself "just in time" and that is a big step!;)

Well, a possible reprieve as a result of the condo owners' meeting tonight.

One owner, who runs crews as a project manager for a major construction company, looked at the projected expenditures for future work on the buildings, and thought the figures were "out to lunch."

The figures in the Reserve Fund Study are created and projected by engineers, who are by nature risk-averse - and that is a good thing.

Now, the construction guy is going to talk to his tradespeople and get more of a 'real quote'. There is a three-person committee looking after this, including him (and our Board accountant).

We'll know by mid-August if we can do the huge expensive things for less than written down.

As for the meltdowns...my job-share colleague told me today to cut myself some slack. Our employers are wonderful people - but the one fellow can be pretty intense...and sometimes we are on our own figuring things out that our bosses aren't clear on. (That's why we're paid the big bucks, right? ;) )

Still going to check with my doc, but I feel better.

Thanks everyone.

I'm glad that it feels like the load is lightening up a bit for you, Candace. Sometimes it just gets to be too much. I'm only speaking for myself here but it's a lot easier when there's a partner to share things with and help w/encouragement, etc. As the song says "It's a long trip alone". You've always come across as strong and quite competent, though, so perhaps this doesn't apply to you. If it does, know that we're here for you. :)

Thanks, Mary.

I'm sure it does help to have a partner - as long as it's the RIGHT partner! :p

I'm doing my gratitude list from the movie The Secret before I go to sleep every night, and my hands get all nice and warm, and I fall asleep NP.

It does help to have a very cuddly tabby who is up on my pillow every morning (about 3 am!:) )

But yep - mortgages and other financial commitments don't have 'singles' rates.

A wonderful man, a soulmate, is coming into my life. He is already here - I just haven't noticed yet. (part of my gratitude list).

The deal is I say I am so happy and grateful to have [whatever it is I want], and believe I already have it...and allow the feelings to fill me up on that too. That puts the vibe out to the universe. :-)

The universe - law of attraction - responds to thoughts. If you hate rich people, the law will agree with you and you will not be rich. If you are fighting debt, the Law will answer your focus on debt, and you will have that. The universe doesn't distinguish between positive and negative thoughts - it just provides.

Enough for now...you all take care.

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Originally Posted by Catty1

Thanks, Mary.

I'm sure it does help to have a partner - as long as it's the RIGHT partner! :p

I'm doing my gratitude list from the movie The Secret before I go to sleep every night, and my hands get all nice and warm, and I fall asleep NP.

It does help to have a very cuddly tabby who is up on my pillow every morning (about 3 am!:) )

But yep - mortgages and other financial commitments don't have 'singles' rates.

A wonderful man, a soulmate, is coming into my life. He is already here - I just haven't noticed yet. (part of my gratitude list).

The deal is I say I am so happy and grateful to have [whatever it is I want], and believe I already have it...and allow the feelings to fill me up on that too. That puts the vibe out to the universe. :-)

The universe - law of attraction - responds to thoughts. If you hate rich people, the law will agree with you and you will not be rich. If you are fighting debt, the Law will answer your focus on debt, and you will have that. The universe doesn't distinguish between positive and negative thoughts - it just provides.

Enough for now...you all take care.

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Atta girl! The Secret is ancient and there are many good books on the subject of the Law of Attraction. You're on the right track, girlfriend. Lots of good things are coming your way and there are lots more already here. :)