What do you call your inlaws?

After reading the MIL thread....

What do you call your inlaws? do you call them by their names or do you call them mom and dad?

I call mine by their names... I just can't call them mom and dad. LOL I have a wierd thing about that. I don't even call my step dad "dad". I just cannot call anyone mom and dad except for my parents. I guess to me no one else deserves that title except the people who made me lol. I'm wierd that way. for a while I wouldn't even call them by their names because it just seemed disrespectful lol so I would basically avoid calling out to them at all costs... I would go and find them and speak directly to them eliminating the need to call them anything. Finally my MIL teased me about how I NEVER call her anything... not mom, not peggy, not hey lady... nothing. lol

My husband calls my parents mom and dad.

If I can get away with it I don't call him anything. LOL But if I have to use something I call him by his nickname which everyone uses except his 2 kids.

After my previous thread, you don't REALLY want to know what I call them, do you? :p

j/k Actually I do the exact same thing. I feel weird calling them by their names, but 'mom' and 'dad' doesn't quite feel right. So I try to avoid calling out to them. I have been married 7 years and I still do that :rolleyes: :o

And hubby calls my parents mom and dad, too.

I'm so much like you, in the sense that I was confused at the beginning about what to call my in-laws, and resorted to calling them nothing. :o That eventually became a problem, because when I would talk to my father-in-law on the phone, I didn't know how to ask him if I could talk to my mother-in-law. :o Calling her by her name would be considered rude and unacceptable in my culture, so that was a no no. Calling her 'hubby's mom' would once again be rude. I couldn't say, "May I please speak to the lady?" Even "May I please talk to my mother-in-law" sounds strange. SO...in the end, I gave in, decided that calling someone 'else' Mom and Dad was not going to kill me, and just started calling them what my husband calls them. He calls his mom and dad "Ammi" and "Abba"...which is not what I call my parents, so I still felt there was a difference, and I wasn't calling them the same thing as my parents.......so it worked for me. It also made them happy, and made them feel more like I'm like their daughter, so I guess its worth it.

My hubby also calls my parents what I call them "Mama" and "Baba". My mom didn't like when he called them nothing (he also went through a 'what should I call them?' phase like me), and I understood my mom's feelings. That's another reason why I started calling my in-laws "Ammi and Abba". I felt that if its disrespectful for my husband to call my parents nothing, its disrespectful for me to call his parents nothing. So together, we both started referring to our in-laws as our moms and dads, and eventually, it just increased the bond between us. I WANTED my husband to refer to my parents as his parents, so I guess I just had to expect the same from myself.

I explained to my mother in law my wierd quirk about the mom and dad thing... while I'm sure she thinks I'm completely out there she understood. but NOW having Hannah I mostly refer to them as Grammy and Grandad and they seem to like that lol

As mine is a second marriage, this time around, I call my inlaws by their first names, at their request. It is Ann (my husband's mother), Bill (my husband's father) and Norma (my husband's stepmother). And he calls my parents by their first names, too.

I also try to avoid calling them anything when talking to them. My sister is close to my in-laws and she calls them Mom and Dad, yet I'm a little uncomfortable with it. (My in-laws call my sister their "adopted daughter". When I became a part of their family she did too. :) ) Really though it depends on who I'm talking to. When talking to my husband I call them "your parents". If I'm talking to Nathan I call them Grandma and Grandpa. If I'm talking to my sister I refer to them as Mom Blake and Dad Blake. If I'm talking to someone who knows them personally I refer to them by their first names. If I'm talking to someone who doesn't know them I call them "Justin's parents" or "my in-laws".

:rolleyes: when i first started dating my hubby ( 6 years ago), i called them by their names ( Becky and Glen). then for a while they hated me ( like every parent of a soo good looking man does ;) ) then recently i have been using whatever i feel most comfortable. My hubby's mom is getting use to talking to me know, LMAO, in fact this last week she told her son that she wanted to talk to me about sending her something. LOL :D .. she said she did not trust her son to send her the important documents that she needed for his taxes. LOL, that made me feel good as well.

it took along time for them to feel comfortable around me and my son. she does accept Brady as her grandson now. but, as for me, it took more time.

i think it all depends on who the person is. like their personality, and upbringing. Jeremy's dad Glen is very business like and loves to us Full names and all the uptight stuff. whereas Becky, ( his mom) is more like the get it done type of person, she likes to use names but, more like nicknames.

either way, i think you will be fine calling them grammy and grandad :D

"DEAD" :p

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Originally Posted by moosmom

"DEAD" :p

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LOL :D Thanks for the laugh ;)

I don't have any inlaws. My mother calls my dad's parents what we call them - Memaw and Papa. My dad calls my mother's dad by his name, Jim, and her stepmother by her name, Rose.

I never called my in-laws anything for the same reason as many of you have said. They just were not my mom and dad. Those names were special for only two people in this world. I avoided situations where I would have to call them something. :rolleyes: :o When my children came along we called them Grandmother and PopPop which made it easy. Hubby called my folks Nana and PopPop, again after the kids came. (Thank God for kids! LOL!)

Now that my own kids are married we got the situation settled from Day One. My hubby and I are known by our first names to my son-in-law and daughter-in-law. My kids also call their in-laws by their first names. :)

It may sound strange but in the 5+ years Josh and I have been together I've never called his parents anything :eek: . I think I may have called his Mom Jo (her name is Jo-ann) once. Every other time it's like "Hey you." I just can't seem to bring my self to say Mum and Dad and I have a thing about calling my elders by their first names.

same ol prob here..... well actually not a problem....

just like JenBKR said "would you really wan to know" *sniker sniker*

and like kittycats_delight I avoid any contact if possible :p

and moosmom got me LMAO so bad!!! :D

I try not call them anything but if need so I refer to them as "you" but in the formal use,we, in spanish use you as "tu" for casual use and you as "usted" in a formal use.... complicated to explain in english that´s why I wanted you to know the different meanings of "you"....

and if talking to any of them in the brain dead phase... I would refer to them as "can I talk to your husband/wife"... I can´t for the life of me call them by their names even less call them mom and dad.... I DO love my mom and dad ;) :p....

If I am referring to her, I call her my mum-in-law, but on the rare occasion I need to call her something, it'd be Mom Watts. When she calls here, she always says "it's your mother-in-law" but she has such a distinctive voice that I know who it is as soon as she utters a word!

Again, I'm not married, but I refer to Bruce's mom as Carol. In cards and stuff I do write mom and sign it from both of us. His father is deceased.
I don't think Bruce calls my parents anything. LOL

I call Stuart's Dad by his first name. Even Stuart usually calls him that! He calls my parents by their first names as well. He hasn't spoke to his mother in close to 20 years. On the rare occasions she is brought up, he calls her by her first name, usually with some colorful adjectives around it.

He sort of has a step-mother. His Dad is divorced from his second wife too, but they are good friends and still keep in touch. We both call her by her first name too.

My Mom always called my grandma(my Dad's mom), Mom. It confused me to no end when I was a kid.

I feel weird calling them mom and dad, and I feel weird calling them by their first names, so I just call them Mr. and Mrs. H. I got it from hubby since he started calling my parents from day 1 Mr. and Mrs. W, so I kinda stole it from him. We still call each others' parents by that also.

For many years after I married I avoided calling them anything. Eventually I called them by their names. I always wrote mom and dad on cards and such but never called them that. My MIL is gone now. I still call his dad by his name.

In the beginning I called them Mr and Mrs. ____ as that is how I was raised...and waited for them to tell me ..."please, call us_____. I finally realized they might ask me to call them something I wasn't comfortable saying so I switched to Walt and Wanda.

Never thought about this before but, I guess I called MIL nothing at all.
Husband's dad had already passed away so it was just her.When talking
about my MIL, she was referred to as Nana & my Mom was Grandma (surname) Husband called my mom by her first name.

I think this is a good question. It seems most of us did the same thing at first and tried to avoid calling them anything. I finally started calling my in-laws by their first names and also mom and dad. It just seemed to depend on the situation and the mood.

When I was married, I called my FIL by his first name. My MIL was not living so I didn't call her anything.

Hubby and I both use first names, but I have to admit I also tend to avoid calling them a name. Now that we have children, the grandparent names seem to be what they are called most often.

I call them Mom & Dad just like hubby does.

My parents are both gone, but I called them Momma and Daddy so no conflict for me.

I call my inlaws by their first names, mostly because we go out and party with them, so they're more like friends!
Rick calls my parent's Mr. and Mrs. X.
He want's SO badly to call them by their first names, but he says it's too weird. We've been together for 14 years, you'd think by NOW he'd be able to! :D

John calles my parents mom and dad...not that they have always liked it lol. I usually end up calling my MIL mom, even though John tends not to oddly enough.

When me and Dustin first got together, I tended not to refer to them if I could. His dad would have laughed at me if I called them Mr. or Mrs. Colbert. I'm pretty sure his mom would have had a fit. (She hated her MIL) I didn't feel comfortable calling them by their names.

After being considered part of their family (I was taken in almost immediately) for eight years. If talking to them directly it's Momma Pam and Daddy Dave. If I'm talking to someone else it's Pam and Dave.

Dustin never really have that "what to call them" phase. It went from "Hey you" the first few months to Momma Kat and Twig (Dad's nickname - long story. Might as well be considered his first name).

What I find really funny is he has always called my G-ma Grandma and the same with his grandparents and me. It's always been Nonnie and Grandma Peggy and Poppa Glen.

First time around, I tried to avoid the issue.
Second time around I asked my MIL what she would like me to call her (what a novel idea, huh?) Turned out she asked me to call her by her full first name - Florence- because she loved it yet everyone shortened it to Flo, which she wasn't crazy about. I was very happy to address her as she wished! I called my FIL by his first name, too.

I love my inlaws, I really lucked out in the inlaw department. I don't feel comfortable calling anyone other then my mother "mom", so I call my mother in law either by her first name (Bonnie) or her title (Nana). More often, though, I call her Nana since Quinn's getting older and I want to make sure she knows who Nana is. My father in law's name is Ed, but everyone calls him Daddy Eddie...even his grandkids, so we, also, call him Daddy Eddie.

I used to call them by Mr. or Mrs. Miller. I now call them by their first names. I just can't call them mom or dad. However, Marilyn signs her emails to me 'Mom' and calls me her daughter and I don't mind that.

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Originally Posted by ramanth

However, Marilyn signs her emails to me 'Mom' and calls me her daughter and I don't mind that.

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Pam does that too. I'm the daughter she always wanted and apparently my SIL is the daughter Dave has always wanted so it all worked out. Pam tells Dustin to tell "Ann and the babies (Bull and Isis)" that she loves them every time he goes to hang up with her.

I don't have any in-laws, but I call Mike's mom by her last name, I just feel odd calling her by her first name.

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Originally Posted by moosmom

"DEAD" :p

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Donna, you are just too much!:D

A long time ago when I was engaged, I fell in love with his parents and visa versa (fell outta love w/him). As a joke one day, when his mother didn't hear me talking to her, I yelled "Maaaaaaaaa"! and she loved it. So then I called his dad "Paaaaaaa". They were so wonderful to me and sometimes I wish I kept in contact with them.The ex avoided calling my parents anything (or at least anything he could repeat) It was NOT a mutual admiration society.

I had to come back to this thread after seeing my sister last night. My sister's getting married in a couple months and last night was her bridal shower. I was almost surprised (but knowing my sister, not too surprised) how easily she calls EVERYONE "Mom". She of corse calls our mom "Mom", she calls my M-I-L "Mom", she calls her future M-I-L "Mom", and she calls her future step M-I-L "Mom". Last night was getting a little confusing with so many of her "moms" in the same room, she had to call all of them "Mom" followed by their last name.