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I didnīt knew where to post this....... but......
I just stopped using my birth control method........soooo.......
hand me a bottle of PT water....... NOW!!! :D ;)
I want to, hubby not yet........ but I WANT TO!!!..........
so hoping to change his mind.......PT vibes needed ;) :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by Husky_mom
LOL well if you are off BC than it's all up to him now to prevent it :D and that's tough for men lol.
Good luck :D
woohoo!!! How exciting! Here's some of the special PT water. It's quite potent ;) :D
Hubby may not be ready now, but I bet when he sees the first sonogram, or holds his baby for the first time, his mind will change. :D
Ummm...does hubby know you off the pill???
You know, honesty and all that crap...LOL
Take care! :)
I was not taking pills, but yeah he knows i took off my *thingy*....... hehe
he told me he wants to but later, maybe last months of year, but since I already took it off, who knows :p ;)
How exciting! I remember when I first got off the pill. I felt like a silly teenager the first time without it. My hubby wasn't ready until the day Hugito came out.
Buena suerte! Just remember to keep it fun. Don't make it a chore.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Husky_mom
Hate to be a killjoy, but better listen to your husband's thoughts on this
before you go ahead with what you want. Nothing worse than "tricking"
someone into fatherhood.
If you both agree, than go ahead & take a drink of the water. :)
I agree with Lizbud.Quote:
Nothing worse than "tricking" someone into fatherhood.
I agree with lizbud.
There are too many "unwanted" babies/children in this world. However, if you and your hubby feel the time is right for BOTH of you, then good luck to you.
My hubby and I decided to start trying for a baby 18 months ago....we are now in the process of being referred for IVF treatment due to complications with both of us. Naturally I feel quite strongly about people who jump into pregnancy without considering what they are doing!
I highly agree. If he's not ready, this could really cause problems with your marriage.Quote:
Originally Posted by lizbud
Men hate nothing more then a woman who tricks them into having a child. This is not only dishonest to your marriage it is immoral to bring an unwanted child into this world. If I was a man and a woman did this to me I would boot her out the door. Children are a lifelong commentment not a dirty joke to play on someone.
UM lol I don't think she was insinuating that she was just gonna go ahead and get pregnant and force it on him lol. jumping the gun JUST a little aren't we?
AND.... what are the rules on the baby tricking both parents into parenthood? :D
Ditto. My best friend left his wife because she "tricked" him after he said he wanted to finish school before trying to have a baby. It's not a happy situation for anyone, least of all the baby.Quote:
Originally Posted by lizbud
Hey, if he does know, and he seems to, then it won't hurt him to look after birth control for a while.Quote:
I was not taking pills, but yeah he knows i took off my *thingy*....... hehe
Just glad he is in the loop! lol
Sorry but I have never heard of a baby tricking a parent. If they don't want it let them abort or put the child up for adoption. None of us asked to be born but once here we deserve to be wanted and loved. Not all people become parents when they have a child some stay too selfish, childess and stupid. Some should never have kids. Children are too precious to not want. If you don't or can't take care of a child there are people who will.
Marigold: I can't believe you've never heard about that. It's very old and well used. And preventing pregnancy is much more accepted than abortion. Abortion shouldn't be used as a method of birth control, though I do believe we should all have that right. And there are plenty of people who do not want children and shouldn't be punished for that right.
Husky_Mom: Sorry this has gotten so nasty. Perhaps we should make a new thread?
I agree lets not get mad at each other. I don't want that to happen. ;) Lets talk about something much nicer like spring.
You can have my share of the water ... ALL of it. Keep it far away from me. We have MORE than enough kids around here like it is. LOL
Well, early congratulations to your family, Isabel! Will this be your second? or third? Sorry, I don't recall, but I do remember how adorable your little boy looked with all those puppies last year! Just remember not to gulp the water....you may end up with twins! ;)
Eeesh, chill out people!
I'm sure Isabel shared this information out of joy and excitement. She stated that her husband knows she is no longer using her form of birth control. If he doesn't want a child at the moment then he needs to make the effort for birth control now.
I don't believe it's possible for Isabel to just pop out a child by herself, so it's not like she's going to do it without her husband knowing.
Good luck with your hubby, Isabel, and hopefully he will give into your wishes sooner or later. ;) You can have alllllllll of my PT water because I don't want any children. ;)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kfamr
Well in real life it seldom works that way kay. Women do have to take the
lead on preventing children if they are not wanted by both parents.
Anywho, I did not mean to start an controversy here or throw cold water
on a light hearted thread. Please forgive me Isabel, if it seems that way.
I will now bow out of this thread.
You do whats best for yourself and your family HM...I'm sure you would always do your best for yours ;)
Wombat
Have great fun "trying" Isabel! It may take a few months anyway before you hit the jackpot so then your husband will get his wish anyhow :p
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marigold2
OH good lord.... it was a JOKE. man you are sensitive. I meant trick the parents because we weren't planning on getting pregnant :rolleyes: but we did and we couldn't be happier. It was a joke don't get your knickers ina twist... and I whole heartedly agree that abortion should NEVER be used as a form of birth control. BUT it should be available because that would only open a whole new can of worms.
And like I said before.... I don't recall her EVER saying she was going to trick her husband into pregnancy. She even said he is WELL aware that she stopped her current form of birth control. There is nothing TRICKY about making the man responsible for birth control for a while. :rolleyes: My husband was "in charge" of the birth control since JUNE lol. BUT we made a miscalculation with the calendar and now we have a wonderful surprise..... BUT he has been ready for kids for a LOOOOOOOONG time... he was just waiting on me. I can't say I thought I was ready at the time but I sure feel I am ready now.
If he ain't ready then he has to learn to control his urges lol It takes TWO people to do this.
Isabel, good luck and eventually your husband will come around..... another mouth to feed can be a scary thought for anyone.... even those who think they are totally ready. :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by Babyboonie
I'm the same way. I can't help but get mad when I see a teenager expecting when I can't conceive!
Sorry that was OT.
Sounds like he's just having the normal jitters that comes with actually "trying". Good luck!
Quote:
Originally Posted by sirrahved
I agree. Our dear friends just had their first child. It was kind of a now or never type deal because she is older than him and it was a very high risk pregnancy as it was. He was not sure he was ready.... money, career, just being able to be a parent, period. I don't think ANYONE is truly ready when they see that little "positive" sign lol. but now he has a beautiful son. she put all his fears to rest and he is a wonderful father. There was no tricking involved....they simply talked out their fears and concerns.
Our other friends just recently got pregnant. they were both in agreement that they were ready. She found out yesterday and they are both FREAKING OUT lol.
No one can truly prepare themselves for the reality that hits them when there is no doubt that there is a baby on the way. Even the best prepared parents get scared sometimes :D
Reading back over my original posting, I think my emotions were running high! I am the same as you Sirrahved and it's a hard thing to come to terms with if you want to have children. I suppose in some ways I am still in denial and am convinced it will happen , but it never will naturally...if at all. Still at least the "tryings" fun!!Quote:
Originally Posted by sirrahved
Husky Mom - good luck and have fun!
well............ good I dinīt see much of the discussion, but thanks to those who understand.........
this would be my second, if it ever happens............ so I thik I know what Iīm doing and what to expect......... itīs not "just for fun"
and my hubby knew from the start so I was in no way tricking him.........
he just thinks heīs not quite ready for a second one right now.......if he waits until he thinks heīs ready they itīll never happen....... :rolleyes:
I stopped the BC because it was time for changing the "item" for a new one and since I have to wait for 3-4 months so they replace it, I somewhat seized the opportunity for the posibility of a second child.........
itīs not like I have to get preg right this second maybe around june/july or so...... if he feels better waiting then he can contribute on the BC......
there are other factors involving me wanting a child now, but they donīt seem to affect him, I mean heīs a man ha can hava a kid even when hes 70 but I canīt and Iīm not getting any younger........... I want to have the physical condition to donīt sleep, be always on the lookut, play and everything a child involves.......I donīt want them to be too apart from each other agewise........
anyway thanks for your support and hopefully PT vibes work on my hubby fast so he "thinks" hes ready ;)
:) Well Isabela I say good luck.. However be honest with hubby on this matter.. Who knows it could take you till next year to get preg.. Then again around here at PT it could take lots sooner.. :D
Hope all goes well :D
My chances of having a child is low to nill. But I was still asked to be a serogate (sp) down the road. He said whether I can or cannot, I'm still first choice & only choice. So if I cannot, then they will go without aswell... Talk about putting it all on me, sheesh :p But I wont be your typical serogate, I will still have all my motherly rights & will be mom... complicated I know, but worth it.
HM, just tell him that if he waits until he is over 40 (I don't know how old he is just guessing lol) then he will be SIXTY by the time the child is even old enough to move out... and that is assuming the child moves out right when it turns 18 ;) LOL I know I wouldn't want that.
Ahhhhh......I dunno....I think it's ok. I'm 58, and my daughter is 14, and we have the best time ever. But then again, this is my second time around, my other two daughters are grown up and long gone on with their own lives.Quote:
Originally Posted by sparks19
It's a matter of choice really. Some of my mates at the time thought I was nuts for wanting to start all over again.....but I'd never even think of trading their lifestyles for mine...I reckon I'm miles ahead....I have the best relationship going with my little poppett.
But, it's all up to the individual as to what makes them happy in life. ;)
Wom
Congrats Isabel! :D I hope all goes exceedingly well! :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat2u2004
My father is 60 and also has a 17 year old son.... he doesn't live with my dad though but he always loves to see him when he can (he actually goes to a private school about 5 hours away from home.... his mothers choice. He is about to head off to college though anyway) and OF COURSE my dad would never opt to be without him... that would be silly :D
BUT I imagine.... at this age... 60 seems a long way away for them lol and that seems awfully "old" to have young children at home (not that it is actually old lol age isn't just a number that is for sure lol) But I can definately see how some would think "wow. Kids still at home when I am 60? That is MY time :D " LOL.
of course... for most women this is much different.. I could NOT imagine having to go through pregnancy and give birth after 40.... It practically kills me now lol and I am only 25 hahaha. I want to be done by the time I am 30 lol.
It is all a matter of perspective. I did all my "MY" time when I was younger. I completed ALL my education, I travelled, I went out with friends, I bought a home, clothes, went without sleep, established a career, had health benefits, etc. I had Jonah at 38. I was done 'trying to find myself', and crying about "me" time things. I was as selfish as I wanted to be. Now? I have nothing that I love doing more than being a mother. Being second, putting his needs ahead of mine. And, I feel none of this, "oh, what about me and MY needs" that I hear other young mother's complain of. Maybe it is a sad commentary on my life but, I have pretty much 'done' all that I ever wanted to do. Doesn't mean I don't have interests, hobbies, or things I can still do now, but, really, the major events were over for me.Quote:
Originally Posted by sparks19
I think having a child 'older' was the only way for me to go. And, for the record, even at 37 I was in much better physical shape than ANY of my younger friends. While I can't say the same now, I am still more active than most younger people I know. And, look at it this way- you need less sleep as you age.
HM- Congrats, and I cannot wait to hear all the wonderful things that come.
Johanna
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cataholic
By "my" time I mean retirement lol. See for me.... we don't have the funds to do all the travelling although I am quite satisfied with my level of travel and the travel that I want to do in the near future is kind of "childish" anyway LOL. BUT when we retire we will have the means and the time to do so. For me.... my career is going to be a stay at home mom and making jewellry lol... so that wasn't much of a concern for me. I can't say that I am unhappy with what I have done.... and I can't say that I feel I haven't had the me time. But I want to have as much time with my children as I can. For me, starting now means I will have that many more years (hopefully) to enjoy my kids as they get older and older and to hopefully enjoy grandkids and great grandkids for many years. But of course that is only the way I feel :D
YOu are right... it really is a preference type thing... but from my experience... it seems to be MEN that take "getting old" the hardest hehehe. Perhaps it is because I am only 25 but I am kind of looking forward to getting older lol especially "retirement" whereas my husband is all out of sorts every year around his birthday lol.
What ??? 60 ??? Old ??? I'm shaking my walking stick in anger !!!! LOLQuote:
Originally Posted by sparks19
I must admit, that when I read this post this morning, my mouth was so wide open that my dentures fell into the toilet bowl !!!! So I had to fish them out with the toilet brush and stick em back into my mouth.
Well anyway....dentures apart....I think everybody is different in the way they interpret age and the raising of children.
I think that there's plus's and minus's for everyones methods. My mother gave birth to me when she was 16, and to my youngest sister when she was 31 (that making big brother 15yo at the time)....so my mother has had no life other than raising kids....Deb left home when she was 25, so for 40 years my mother did the mother thing. Thats a long time to raise kids. But my mother wouldn't have it any other way.....she is one of those country ladies who fed it if it moved or painted it if it didn't.
I guess one of the plus's for that is that she has this great extended family....she had six of us, and now she has all of these grandkids, and great grand kids....and she's only 74...still quite fit and able. But I guess the minus side of it, is that she has never been anywhere or done anything. But as I said, she wouldn't have had it any other way.
I believe people should just do what they think is right for them. As for me, well....I guess I have done it both ways....had a family when I was younger, AND when I was older. I have no gripes about that at all. It has suited me.
I have my house, my bicycle, my $2 in the bank...and three wonderful daughters who I will make myself a real burden on one day LOL.
But yeah....I reckon I've done it right....and I reckon so has my mum. And so will you Sparksy.
Wombat
Well...I don't know if men do take getting older more seriously.Quote:
Originally Posted by sparks19
I have posted a pic here of myself....do you think I look ok for my age ????
Wombat
LOL YOU look stunning.....
As for my dad..... try telling him he is 60 LOL.... he's just happy he gets the senior discount but still acts like he is 12 hahaha. My brother is almost 38 and he is the same way haha and they have their 4th child on the way now.... I however am planning on stopping at two lol. There is 20 years difference between my oldest sibling and my youngest sibling lol. Of course.... these weren't all with the same woman. My dad has been married 3 times lol so he definately LOOKS his age ;) hahaha
My mom had her first child at 19 during her first marriage and then she had me at 30 during her second marriage. She says that for her even having a child at 30 was hard on her physically. LOL I figure my body is falling apart as it is so I better get started before I am totally broken down lol.
No you are right... not all men take aging hard. My dad's opinion is that he has EARNED his senior discount lol but darned if he will ever act his age :D Thats kind of how I feel... but ask me that again in 15 years when I will be turning the big Four Oh lol.
But there is no harm in trying that tactic... it just might work lol. My hubby is 7 years older than me and he was ready a long time ago... he was just waiting on me haha.
Thanx for that....I really do like to take care of myself....lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by sparks19
Would you believe me if I told you I look no older than 18 ??? No ??? Well then how about 40ish ??? Still no ??? Ok.... lets just round that off to a cool 57....and not a day more !!!!
My 24 year old daughter usually has a joke with me on my birthday. For instance, just recently when I turned 58, she said to me " Geez Dad...you've only got 42 years more to get to 100"...the cheeky little bugga....to which I replied " Well said Christie, and you've only 42 years more to get to 66".
That shut her right up !!!! LOLOL
Yeah....but I know what you mean about getting too old to have kids, my ex had my youngest (14) when she was 38, and that was her first child. Even tho she went thru a very difficult time, she admits that our youngest is her shining achievement, outstripping all of her years of academia.
Wombat
Wombat