All of you Married folks out there!

What drives you nuts, about your spouse??? I named my Huby after a street "One Way"!! he is a pain, for example, tonight I was making dinner, hubby comes in the kitchen, and notices dinner is just about done, so what does he do?? he grabs one Plate, one fork and starts to put his dinner plate together, then sits down and begins to eat!! I was livid! the least he could have done was set the table, or at least got the kids dinner for them! He does this all the Time! very frustrating!!http://www.e-equestrian.com/images/smilies/mad.gif

So what drives you nuts????

What bothers me about my husband, how much time do we have?

Be thankful he is still there to do that :(

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Originally Posted by Marigold2

What bothers me about my husband, how much time do we have?

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LMAO! I was just thinking the same thing. I think you just opened the proverbial Pandora's Box here!

Let's see ....

How he makes ME do all the discipline with the kids while he does all the fun stuff ... so I end up looking like the evil mother/step-mother and he looks like super dad.

How he feeds my formerly well-trained dogs the table scraps, right from the table, and has turned them into obnoxious beggars.

How he procrastinates about EVERYthing ... like taking a YEAR to finally do something that takes ten minutes to complete.

How he never sorts the laundry ... whites with reds with blues. :rolleyes:

How he always wanders off when we are ready to do something else .... for example, I'll say, "Dinner in ten minutes." Everyone else is downstairs for dinner in ten minutes .... no hubby. Why? Because five minutes ago he got in the truck and wandered down to the store to buy a newspaper.

How he only remembers to take his wet/muddy boots off outside after he tracks up the entire kitchen first.

And here's my super petty one, but it drives me NUTS ... how he will use or open something, and just leave the empty package there. He will use the last razor blade, leave the plastic container in the medicine chest. He will buy something at the store to fix something around the house, and leave the empty box/plastic bag/cardboard backing laying where ever he did the project ... whether it be a shelf in the garage or the middle of the living room floor ... and just wander away.

I could go on and on and on and on and on ....

But, I try to always remember, for all his bad habits and annoying traits, I've go just as many, I'm sure. And he truly is a kind, loving man at heart. If it wasn't for those darn empty packages laying all over .... ;)

Spouse: "Will you wash the dishes tonite dear ??"
Wombat: "No, I have a dishwasher"
Spouse: "No you don't have a dishwasher!!!"
Wombat: "Of course I do !!!! Why do you think I bloody married you for??"

Everyone has quirks, and my hubby is no exception but on the same token I'm not exactly Miss Polly Perfect either lol. :D The key is communication though. Its best to get things out in the open, even if they seem petty or illogical, so that a comprimise can be found. Festering annoyances can breed a lot of hostility.

Well mine might be rather silly. ( but what the hey..)..
My husband loves to build stuff- or add stuff, or replace stuff. He has a masters license in a ton of things across the board, but these projects take up weekends. I cant really complain becuase its things that would be nice. ( like a huge wood bin with a roof to keep the wood dry by the back door, or outlets in good places, or new stove from electric to now gas etc) or extra closets where I would never have known one could go.
When we first got together I learned REAL QUICK not to say things like " I wish I had a light in my closet, or a brighter light, or 'cant put the table there as there isnt a plug for the lamp- or its always cold by the doors ( adds vents..) . Honey do lists appear out of no where- and he is the one that makes the list!

. One afternoon on a saturday, I was sleeping during the day from working at night. Woke up to get ready for work, when he comes in the room and as I walk across the room to turn on another light to see in the closet- he said - here is your switch honey- and poof the light came on in the closet.. lol. I have tons of examples- but I never heard him in the room.
Now we have a heating system I understand how to turn on and off- and " know who it works- ( propane below 37 degrees, heat pump over 37, and ac when needed as a dual "fuel" system) - but honestly - if I had to do more than that- I could be lost with this space ship control panel.. The new microwave asks you questions, to the point we are making jokes about it.. ( your food is still chilled ( instead of done). Or stoppping in defrost- food needs to be turned..So now I say things like- " the microwave says the door bell is going to ring.."
I love the fact he knows what he is doing. Its a welcome relief to have a man, unlike my ex that doesnt " fix things until hopelessly broke requiring a new item" . lol.
BUT WHY ALWAYS THE WEEKEND?? Yes------ I know that is when he is off- but every weekend??? I know its his time to relax and do what he wants- and I appreciate it- but I would like to just sit and watch a movie together. I do not dare say anything about it. After all I spend alot of time on the phone or computer with dog people, talk shows and litters, and of course run two classes a week.. He has come to a few of my classes, then makes comments all the way home like " why did so in so even bother getting a dog??? What an idiot..".. At the same time- in his projects- I get drafted as an extra hand once in a while like to hold something in place etc. And its always when I was in the middle of dishes- or working with Zubin or galina for show or something else.. " SURE HONEY- I will be right there.."
Will the projects every stop??? NOPE!! He also has all these forms of auto cad and made all these drawings for- a new deck that wraps around the house, dormers upstairs to make the loft bigger for a spa type bathtub ( uh we already have a whirlpool in the uh basement family room bath..), new counter tops in the kitchen ( uh whats wrong with the one we have??)..
PLEASE HONEY- JUST COME WATCH A movie with me.. lol. ( sniff sniff.. ) " Maybe tomorrow honey- I am tired.."

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Originally Posted by Marigold2

What bothers me about my husband, how much time do we have?

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Well my dear, we have all the time in the world.
Start writing !!!! ;)

You women are never happy... LOL

I love my wife as Christ loves the Church. Still... ;)

She can be a little messy from time to time. Most of the time it is just something to laugh at. Our running joke is whenever we stay at a hotel, it just seems her bags BARF all over the room not 5 minutes after we have been there. I just like to have things a LITTLE organized.

That being said, Tanya (Sparks19) is truely my soulmate. We have so much in common it is uncanny. 2-3 times a day, we finish each others sentences. Really.

:)

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Originally Posted by Twisterdog

LMAO! I was just thinking the same thing. I think you just opened the proverbial Pandora's Box here!

Let's see ....

How he makes ME do all the discipline with the kids while he does all the fun stuff ... so I end up looking like the evil mother/step-mother and he looks like super dad.

How he feeds my formerly well-trained dogs the table scraps, right from the table, and has turned them into obnoxious beggars.

How he procrastinates about EVERYthing ... like taking a YEAR to finally do something that takes ten minutes to complete.

How he never sorts the laundry ... whites with reds with blues. :rolleyes:

How he always wanders off when we are ready to do something else .... for example, I'll say, "Dinner in ten minutes." Everyone else is downstairs for dinner in ten minutes .... no hubby. Why? Because five minutes ago he got in the truck and wandered down to the store to buy a newspaper.

How he only remembers to take his wet/muddy boots off outside after he tracks up the entire kitchen first.

And here's my super petty one, but it drives me NUTS ... how he will use or open something, and just leave the empty package there. He will use the last razor blade, leave the plastic container in the medicine chest. He will buy something at the store to fix something around the house, and leave the empty box/plastic bag/cardboard backing laying where ever he did the project ... whether it be a shelf in the garage or the middle of the living room floor ... and just wander away.

I could go on and on and on and on and on ....

But, I try to always remember, for all his bad habits and annoying traits, I've go just as many, I'm sure. And he truly is a kind, loving man at heart. If it wasn't for those darn empty packages laying all over .... ;)

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Wait! hold the phone....did you marry my Hubby????? Cause they seem to have the exact same habits!:D

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Originally Posted by Twisterdog

How he procrastinates about EVERYthing ... like taking a YEAR to finally do something that takes ten minutes to complete.

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My husband suffers from this disorder as well. I wish I could think of some examples right now but unfortunately at the moment I can't remember.

Another thing along the same lines is when we discuss a *project* to be done around the house. Of course I always see the need and he doesn't. :rolleyes: When I finally convince him to share the vision of my project we then launch into the next phase. That is days of rolling it around in his mind about the best way to do it. This frequently involves researching things on the internet. :rolleyes: Sometimes he will tell me it is not practical that we embark on this project (usually too much work involved). When I suggest hiring a professional he says he doesn't want to because he is quite capable of doing the work himself and it would kill him to watch someone do it and probably not do it as well as he would. :rolleyes: Of course when said project is finished he is quite pleased with himself about it all. :p

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Originally Posted by Pam

My husband suffers from this disorder as well. I wish I could think of some examples right now but unfortunately at the moment I can't remember.

Another thing along the same lines is when we discuss a *project* to be done around the house. Of course I always see the need and he doesn't. :rolleyes: When I finally convince him to share the vision of my project we then launch into the next phase. That is days of rolling it around in his mind about the best way to do it. This frequently involves researching things on the internet. :rolleyes: Sometimes he will tell me it is not practical that we embark on this project (usually too much work involved). When I suggest hiring a professional he says he doesn't want to because he is quite capable of doing the work himself and it would kill him to watch someone do it and probably not do it as well as he would. :rolleyes: Of course when said project is finished he is quite pleased with himself about it all. :p

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Oh....my hubby is the same way, when I wanted to put my horse barn in, i was getting quotes about how much it would cost, I just wanted a simple pole barn But noooo.......Hubby decided he wanted to build it all by himself, took him 1 1/2 years, and it ended up being twice the size that we needed. Not that it isnt nice, but he isnt completely finished with it either! and him dong it, cost twice as much, had i just had the company come in a put up a nice pole barn!

Oh boy, being the voice of reason (as I call it) is my top annoyance. He KNOWS I'm right but can't bring himself to do anything. So then he lets it build within himself and waits for me to get frustrated enough to open the conversation in front of the kids.... then *BOOM* explosion where everything he's held in for months comes out. But the explosion comes in a manner where he makes *me* look like the bad guy for starting the explosion.

He wears blinders regarding the kids and just can not punish them. I'm not talking "punishment" but how about reigning them in once in a while? My oldest is LAZY, hubby hands him money left and right, and does ALL his college papers for him. Want a laugh? I'll email you one of my son's unedited essays that he knocks out in 5 minutes which takes days for hubby to edit and make it readable. The voice of reason here says he only writes that bad because he knows that daddy will fix it for him. Hubby found that out last week when for the first time in 2 years daddy didn't have time to do it and son called the next day crying about how much "Pressure you're putting on me!" :rolleyes: The youngest is a spoiled little princess who drives HIS car to school. He actually allows her to drop him off and pick him up. Some days he's at work for an extra 5 hours til she can come for him. Ummmmm...... what about the BUS?!?! It has yet to kill a kid from embarasssment. The bus thing? His answer is I could just as easily take a bus to my work... I could but I also OWN the car and PAY for the gas and upkeep. I could go on for ever about the whole Ashley, Cam, and Cam's father situation - thats the one where he knows I'm most right but refuses to do anything about it because he doesn't want to "piss her off" Huh?!?!

Ok, thats my big rant for hubby. Anything else is minor little annoyances.

Whew, I feel much better getting that off my chest. I needed that! Thanks!!! :D

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Originally Posted by Puckstop31

You women are never happy... LOL

I love my wife as Christ loves the Church. Still...

She can be a little messy from time to time. Most of the time it is just something to laugh at. Our running joke is whenever we stay at a hotel, it just seems her bags BARF all over the room not 5 minutes after we have been there. I just like to have things a LITTLE organized.

That being said, Tanya (Sparks19) is truely my soulmate. We have so much in common it is uncanny. 2-3 times a day, we finish each others sentences. Really.

:)

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LOL you MUST be talking about some other wife :o ;) OK OK I admit.... I am very messy LOL.

I say the only thing that gets on my nerves sometimes is when he doesn't listen. I will say like 5 sentences and then I get a blank stare and a "huh" then I repeat myself only to find he is not listening again LOL.

BUT other than that I can't really say there is anything that really grates my nerves or anything. I really am one of the lucky ones. My husband cleans... cooks and pampers me daily LOL I feel like I do nothing for him but he assures me that I do lol.

I am divorced now but years later I realized how far down I was on his list of priorities and the problems that resulted from that. Everything and everybody came before home and me..

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Originally Posted by critter crazy

Wait! hold the phone....did you marry my Hubby????? Cause they seem to have the exact same habits!:D

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LOL ... so how come the two of us combined can't straighten him out!? ;)

Must be a guy thing. lol

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Originally Posted by Pam

Sometimes he will tell me it is not practical that we embark on this project (usually too much work involved). When I suggest hiring a professional he says he doesn't want to because he is quite capable of doing the work himself and it would kill him to watch someone do it and probably not do it as well as he would.

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Oh yes, I know that scenario well. My BIL is the same way. My sister and I have a running joke ... whenever one of us mentions some project or idea we look at each other and say, "Nope. Can't be done." because that is her husband's knee-jerk reaction to ANYthing she proposes.

And have you ever noticed that the ONLY thing that lights a fire under them IS proposing to hire a professional to do it instead? I sometimes just get a free quote, and "accidently" leave it laying on the kitchen counter. The project gets done the next weekend. Of course, I have to hear about how he did it himself and saved us umpteen gazillion dollars that I would have spent hiring it done. Ok, honey, yeah sure fine, you're right. ;)

I'm not married to him but I've been living with him for a few years, and I have to say...he does do things that irritate me....like poking and prodding and tickling and startling me until I snap, or saying "WATCH OUT!" any time another car enters the road while I'm driving, but I know I drive him crazy too...by leaving dishes unwashed in the sink, by putting off doing the laundry, or by holding in stress until I can't take it anymore and having a breakdown all over him, usually in the middle of the night. :D

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Originally Posted by sparks19

OK OK I admit.... I am very messy LOL.

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That would absolutely be Stuart's biggest peeve with me! I am messy and I don't give a hoot about changing it! It is far more important to me that my dogs' yards are clean than if the top of my stove is wiped off!

Mine with him is his complete inability to throw anything out because he might need it someday; he might be able to build something with it; he can come up with 100 excuses for keeping junk!! He goes to the dump and comes home with almost as much stuff as he left with! Now that his shop is finished, he can keep all his treasures out there! He's going to be gone all summer/fall. That will give me a chance to take any remaining junk in the house to the SalyAnn!

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Originally Posted by critter crazy

the least he could have done was set the table, or at least got the kids dinner for them!

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Did you ask him to set the table?

In all fairness, people aren't mind readers - and don't say "he should know better" - like I said, he's not a mind reader.

Also, how old are the kids? Can they set the table? If they are fairly young, get some indestructable plastic or corell plates. I set many a table when I was young. If this task is done before dinner is ready, then the problem should go away.

Next time he grabs one plate - give him the rest of the plates, give him a big hug, tell him how wonderful he is, and ask him and/or the kids to set the table.

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Originally Posted by Glacier

Mine with him is his complete inability to throw anything out because he might need it someday; he might be able to build something with it; he can come up with 100 excuses for keeping junk!! He goes to the dump and comes home with almost as much stuff as he left with! Now that his shop is finished, he can keep all his treasures out there! He's going to be gone all summer/fall. That will give me a chance to take any remaining junk in the house to the SalyAnn!

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LOL! My dad and my husband are both like that. My dad has literally gone through my garbage cans when he comes to visit to see if I "might have thrown anything good out." OMG!

They will both keep bent nails, broken hinges, scraps of wood too small to make a domino out of, etc. etc. ... "Might come in handy someday." As if they ever remember where, or what, it is when they might need it eight years from now.

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Originally Posted by catland

Did you ask him to set the table?

In all fairness, people aren't mind readers - and don't say "he should know better" - like I said, he's not a mind reader.

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Well, I don't know about CritterCrazy and her hubby in this situation, but if it were me and my DH (which it's not, he's actually very helpful about things like that), I would have to say .... as an adult, one doesn't have to be a mind reader to know that tables have to be set, that children have to eat, that dinner doesn't magically cook itself. Common sense ... I think the fact that the rest of the family has to eat, too, is a total no-brainer that anyone should know. Just MHO ...

oh boy oh boy..........gotta make time to write it up.........:D

I´m not perfect either......I´m messy, lazy and whatnot.......but one thing that really gets on my nerves.......is my hubby´s temper, besides the not listening thing (why do they have such a short attention span, I believe puppies have more than they do :P) and a much much more that almost everytime gets me (I tend to also stock thing up until I can no longer contain it) is what he claims as his "privacy".......I understand we all need our own private stuff but what bothers me is that some of that includes women.....(work stuff and that) but still I know nothing about them and him claiming private just gets me and BAD!!......how could I not, I mean I trust him but that I consider should not be "private" unless you want me to think otherwise that just "work" you know.........and to top it all, that he gets mad at me for snooping on his stuff......(I also understand the madness about that but not on the subject of othe women)......

I have my own private stuff but that does not inlcude men, and every men I met he knows and that inlcludes their intentions and that I mark my line.....I´M MARRIED YOU KNOW!! and he for not being rude might let them think he´s fair game!!......I HATE THAT!!! the most!!!

I can go on a bit more but boss is here........b back later.......arrrgggg MEN!!

Let me start off by saying that of course Eric's good traits outweigh his bad- or I wouldn't have married him!

That being said, there are things that really annoy me about him. First of all, he is TERRIBLE with money. Awful, and it drives me crazy. He always desires something expensive that I couldn't care less about. He always claims he will "save" for it (he can't save a dime to save his life) but then finds some "deal" that he can't pass up so he'll spend the rest of his paycheck on it. His latest is a projector that he bought this weekend. But, I know I spend money on other things, I like to travel a lot and go home to see my family, and I have the vacation time to it, when sadly he doesn't. So it evens out...I don't care too much as long as we always have enough to pay the essentials.

Another thing that really bugs me is how much he worries about his health. I'm not advocating that he ignore things, but he makes thing worse by obsessing over them too much. Then, if I dismiss his concerns, I'm insensitive, so I just listen but try to focus on the positive.

I know there's a lot of other things that bother me, but those are the most annoying to me. I'm sure I have tons of annoying habits, too. ;)

Eep!


Well, as a newlywed and a super-difficult person to live with, I am not going to join in here.

In addition, I have made a resolution not to bad-mouth my husband publicly. It is always a little scary to me how when groups of women get together, it so very often deteriorates into a b****-session about their men. If it bothers me, I write about it or tell him, but I will not trash him to my mom, sisters, friends, coworkers, etc. Been doing this for several years now (back when we were just best friends and dating) and so far it works very well. It may be hopelessly naive to think I can sustain it forever, but so far it works.

In fact, I always try to throw in something nice and random about him when the sessions start up. Finding a way to compliment him to others and having them all tell me what a wonderful thing it is has really helped me several times when I was beginning to take him for granted, or was just being pouty.

So, with this resolution in mind--- it is crazy what a fabulous baker my husband is. Cheesecake, coffeecake, shortbread and lemon squares are what I have him make the most often (yes, he takes requests). He even made our wedding cake, and everyone said it was fabulous. I was too sick with the viral flu to have any, so when I was finally well enough to go back to work, he worked like a mad man the whole nine hours (and had done prep work before while I was too sick and tired to notice) and re-created it for me, so I could enjoy some of my wedding cake (well, as close to it as I could get, lol).

And trust me, if you had ever tasted this man's cheesecake, you would have been willing to marry him, too!

Cheesecake? you are lucky.

I'm lucky too. My husband is very handy - he can do electrical work, plumbing, sheetrock, you name it. We've spend very little $$'s on home repairs over the years because he can do it himself.

:D :D

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Originally Posted by catland

Did you ask him to set the table?

In all fairness, people aren't mind readers - and don't say "he should know better" - like I said, he's not a mind reader.

Also, how old are the kids? Can they set the table? If they are fairly young, get some indestructable plastic or corell plates. I set many a table when I was young. If this task is done before dinner is ready, then the problem should go away.

Next time he grabs one plate - give him the rest of the plates, give him a big hug, tell him how wonderful he is, and ask him and/or the kids to set the table.

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It is something he has done since we have been married, and we have discussed it numerous times! It is not something he just did this one time! Hence his Nickname "One Way" .My kids have set the table numerous times. The setting of the table wasnt the real issue, the issue was that he thinks of himself first, and foremost, and that is not okay with me, and he knows it. The kids come first.

My man is a massage therapist. Can you say bliss?? Sophist, I'll trade you a massage for a cheesecake sometime! :D :D ;)

I'm not married, but the 3 of us act like a married trio (the guys are married, I'm the single third wheel lol).

Andrew grew up with a silver spoon in his mouth, so he has NO cooking, cleaning, or common sence skills at all... He thought mopping the floor was putting water on the floor & moving it around with the mop.. no cleaner, just a huge lake on the floor :eek:

He said he wanted to help me cook KD one night... I knew his skills & asked him to boil water.. he got the biggest pot & FILLED it... heres the kicker... he didn't turn the stove on :p

My only issue with Chad is when I have to wake up him.. today it took me 20 mins! I was jumping on his bed, play punching him, sitting on him, tickling him, poking him, back rub, pulled his ear, flicked his nose, waved the blanket to make him cold... What got him up was when I was jumping on his bed.. he was laughing, then grabbed my calves & I fell on him.. that got him up lol ok its a lot of fun waking him up, cause I love jumping on his bed, but 20 mins is a little long :rolleyes: When I have to wake Andrew up, I walk into the room (praying they are wearing undies at least!!), then slap his leg... He gets up really fast cause he knows when I wake him up, he slept in (hes not late for work, just later then what he wanted) lol

Men :p
ok ok ok I know they have a huge list on me, but its all good fun

Whatever attracted you to your mate is the same quality that annoys you the most. Like 2 sides of a coin, there is the positive attribute that attracted you but there is a negative side to that attribute as well!
Example: My husband is very intense, and basically that's how he got me. However when he is intensely focused on other things, I find that very annoying and I prefer his focus on me.

You know KitCat, I think you're right. I fell for Mike because he's very caring and compassionate with everyone....and one thing that bothers me is when I'm having trouble doing something he'll come over to "help" and end up taking over. Maybe I shouldn't mind so much, it sure takes a lot of the workload off of me. :)

I love my husband dearly and would not change him for the world BUT he does have some really strange habits like waits until breakfast, lunch or dinner is ready or its a weekend and I might like to do something together like go for a meal order a chinese or go see a film but no John "jackmilliesdad" just has to find something to do like write up what he has done for the day or hang a piece of cornice or make a cabinet or do anything to the house for which I am completely grateful but he always does it at meal times whenever I am about to serve up food, or on a weekend when it is my only time off too and I would love to even settle down with a chinese and a good movie and a nice bottle of wine we always work until 10 or 11 at night getting things done and then up at 5 the next morning to get more things done just once maybe even this weekend I might just tie him up and gag him and make him come with me somewhere or just sit down and relax.

Hell people even in his sleep he is working and that is not a joke he is making something or worrying about a leaking pipe on a job he worked on that day (that was not his fault but it plays on his mind anyway) and is having full conversations so whats a girl to do.....??????

Hey I even woke up on the day after St. Stephen's day and the stairs was gone and I was left with a ladder to climb down and within 2 days we had a stairs and he was varnishing it by New Year's Eve honestly I need to tie him down.....

I can't believe you were left with a ladder! That's a little much! He sounds like a workaholic.

Complete workaholic you should live with him but saying that if I want anything I pretty much get it straightaway. When I was in hospital I said I would like a leather suite for my living room and poof there it was when I got home.

I admired a suit in a shop window for christmas just past on one of our rare shopping together occasions and poof there it was on christmas morning and other little things like that but boy does he work and not just at home but also out on site - he is a self employed plasterer and also makes up his stock of ornate plaster mouldings for his private customers as well as his public customers. I do love him to bits though and would not change him for anything

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Originally Posted by KitCat

I can't believe you were left with a ladder! That's a little much! He sounds like a workaholic.

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Originally Posted by CathyBogart

My man is a massage therapist. Can you say bliss?? Sophist, I'll trade you a massage for a cheesecake sometime! :D :D ;)

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Deal! :D