Help! Extreme Separation Anxiety

Things aren't all great with Dasher. In the beginning, he was a perfect dog. It all started when mom was gone for a while. One day when I was gone for a few hours, he had gotten into some bags and chewed a few things. So, that night, I thought I'd leave him in the bathroom. I came home to carpet and padding ripped up. So, I brought in the metal kennel and had been putting him in that. He was bending the bottom metal wires. Yesterday, I don't know how he did it, he broke a few wires and got out of the kennel. It's ruined now. I left him in my bedroom this morning, came home to carpet and padding ripped up, plus a board beside the door ripped off and chewed.
*Every time I put on my shoes, he thinks he should go with me*

I can't pursue a dog obedience class until he gets well from his heartworm treatment. I want to try Rescue Remedy and I'm going to get a muzzle. I can't let him continue to destroy the house. I need help. I don't consider taking him back unless I've tried everything. I need help.

Well muzzles can catch the paws if left on with out supervision, but the racing muzzle allows them to drink etc. What is your reaction when you come home to this mess? Please be specific.. You come home, walk into the room .. and.. ( take it from there..) ...

I yelled at him and told him what a bad dog he was. He has no clue. Sits there and wags his tail. I also told him to get away from me. I'm not going to be giving lots of treats like I have been, either. I just don't know what to do.

He seems to have a nervous habit of licking his front legs a lot, too. I'm wondering if a little dog medication would help him.

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Originally Posted by dukedogsmom

I yelled at him and told him what a bad dog he was. He has no clue. Sits there and wags his tail. I also told him to get away from me. I'm not going to be giving lots of treats like I have been, either. I just don't know what to do.

He seems to have a nervous habit of licking his front legs a lot, too. I'm wondering if a little dog medication would help him.

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THAT IS WHY this is getting worse. See yelling at him to you makes sense- to the dog- the dog is afraid of your arrival of getting in trouble and becomes more anxious. What you need to do, hard as it is, make the dog as safe as possible, but keep your reunions low key, calm etc. Just let the dog out, walk calm, wait a few minutes take the dog out- then clean the mess.
You coming in like gang busters is worrying the dog that is smart enough to know "HOLY CRAP I AM GOING TO GET YELLED AT WHEN THEY COME BACK- OH NO - OH NO.. OH NO.." .. Unless you catch the dog in the act, saying anything is useless, and only makes the dog more nervous.
Its the same training you do with submissive urination.. Calm let out and reunion.... walking past the dog ignoring the situation in the dogs pressence ( work on your body language not just your words- low relaxed shoulders- slow walk with easy foot steps not stomping... And little by little the dog will relaxed when left knowing they are not going to be in trouble when you get home... And calm down and stop this..

and licking the inside of the leg is a stress reliever. Femka does that once in a while, but use to do it all the time when we first got her. Being in a relaxed environment changes that. Femka only does it if she had a stressful day- like going to the vet..

Val, would it be possible to take him to a doggie daycare? Or somewhere else so he won't be left alone for long periods? Can you contact a behavior trainer in your area for a little one-on-one time in your home rather than waiting till you can take him to classes? I really hope you can find a solution, I know how much you like Dasher, and he seemed like such a good fit.

Yelling at him definitely doesn't work. My greyhound had S.A when I first got her but crating her helped IMMENSELY and she never tried to get out of it or destroy it. I came home from work one nite and she had ripped the trim off the bathroom door and pulled the controllers off the heater. I couldn't yell at her b/c I was too shocked. I was speechless.
But Yelling at him just gives him negative attention and besides that they have no sense of time and what he did was hours earlier and yelling at him - he has no clue why.
I would try to get the Comfort Zone plug in's - that might help.
I'd be very careful with a muzzle b/c if he gets his paw or nail or something stuck in it you might come home to a bigger mess and a more panicked dog.
I'd say if all else fails - try contacting Nancy to talk to him.

This is a good site with methods of treating Dasher's problem.

http://www.ygrr.org/doginfo/behavior-anxiety.html

Might also consult with his Vet about anxiety medication for him while
he is learning that being alone is not the end of his world.It should help.
Best of luck helping him & helping yourself.

Both you and Dasher have been though a lot of turmoil in your lives and
deserve to live a less stressful life. :)

Here's a good link on seperation anxiety:
http://www.hsus.org/pets/pet_care/ou...n_anxiety.html

I don't think it's possible for him to go to doggie daycare until his treatment is well over, if he gets overexcited he can actually go into cardiac arrest.

Good luck with him. We used to have a beagle that had SEVERE seperation anxiety to the point she was hurting herself trying to go through walls and windows. I was really young and my parents didn't have a clue...it wasn't a good ending for her, but hopefully with the more advanced knowledge of today and with someone willing to take the steps, it should work out okay.

Giselle used to have mild SA. For the first few months, it was TORTURE. The key to handling SA is to gradually desensitize the dog to your departure.

During Giselle's first few months, I always had a stuffed Kong in the freezer. Mashed bananas, peanut butter, boiled chicken, canned food, etc. were excellent stuffings! Whenever I left the house (even if it was just to get mail), I'd place a frozen, stuffed Kong on her bed, turn on the TV/radio, close the blinds, and leave without a word. It is important to remember exactly *what* triggers the anxiety. For many dogs, that can include a view to the outside world. For Giselle, that was part of the anxiety. That's why we closed the blinds. The TV/radio serves as a "better", more calming distraction.

At first, I only left for 5 minutes. Then, after a week, I'd increase it to 10-15 minutes. After another week, we'd work up to 30 minutes. After that, I jumped up to 60 minutes. Once I knew she could handle an hour alone, I knew she could handle multiple hours alone. At this point, you can also phase out the good and bad distractions like the TV/radio and the frozen Kong.

And remember not to make a scene when you return. Enter as you left. Maintain a calm, non-chalant demeanor and Dasher will find no reason to get anxious over your departure and arrival. DAP and RR are nice accompaniments, but they won't get you far unless you use good ol' training :)

ETA: Be prepared for destroyed objects for the first few weeks. My tip is to keep the dog in an *entirely* puppy-proof room. Even then, you should expect a gnawed down threshold and table (been there done that ;)).

Thanks for all the help. I feel much better today. Yesterday was just a bad day. Mom fell again yesterday morning. She hurt the opposite shoulder she did last year. It's not quite as bad but she still has to be inactive for a month and then months of therapy. So, coming home to the mess after being at the doctor all morning was horrible. I see I've got to be totally different with Dasher than I was with Duke. I always used to say goodbye to him. I've been practicing putting on my shoes and sitting back down to watch tv. Dasher is catching on pretty quick. He calms down soon after I put them on. Also been carrying my keys from room to room. Going to Petco to get a kong, Rescue Remedy and Comfort Zone. I decided against the muzzle idea. I think that would just add to his anxiety. I'm going to be giving him his kong when I leave while I'm still on vacation. Then, when I go back to work, maybe it won't be so bad. Mom will be home. Thanks for all your help. Things look much better today. I had no idea what I was doing wrong until I read those articles and what you've said here.

Ok... I have a few question to ask you.

Do you have a treadmill at home? How often do you take your dog for walk in the morning? Your dog is frustrated and this is why he is destorying your house. You need to excerise him a lot to remove the frustration that holds him inside. Speration Aneixty is a frustrated energy because there is no healthy simulation. Imagine this, how would you like if you never can go outside your house. You have seen people coming in and go, but all you do is stay home and do nothing? But get a lot of love and food from people? There is no "fun" game to do at home. Wouldn't you go insane?

I have a rottwelier mix who had a severe seperation anexity and he was dumped at the humane society by his pervious family. A H.S. worker warned me that he will do anything to get out and be close to you. He broke two windows and managed to get out of his crate by chewing up the bar. He would whine alll night, but he is a large size dog. He is extremely strong enough to break or damage anything in his way. He got his face scarred because of that. The pervious owner did a wonderful job teach him to have a good manner like he doesn't get on the couch, or whatever, but they did not know how to handle his seperation anexity well.

I went to humane society once in a while to visit a friend who works there. I was not looking for a dog, but I decided to give him a chance. He changed a lot first two weeks in my home. This might sounds toooo simple, but true and you can try it out yourself.

I took Cody on a long walk for two hours on the first day. On the next day, I got up early in the morning to take him for his long walk before I put him in the crate. After I come home I took him another long walk in the afternoon. It helps with his anxeity and he does not care anymore if I left for a few hours.

Sometimes I don't have the time to get up early, I would put him on a treadmill for an hour or so. Now, no one can believe how much he changed in first two weeks just because I overexcerized him. A tired dog is always a good dog. Simple idea! He is always tired and very calm! :)

I can't do anything excessive like that until he gets well from the heartworm treatment. He loves to play fetch and stuff but it'll be a while before he can do that now.

So wait until his heartworm is gone, you can excerise him. One day, You will thank me. I swear. :)

Yes! Exercise! Exercise! Exercise! This dog needs a job and needs to be worn out daily.

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Originally Posted by k9friend

Yes! Exercise! Exercise! Exercise! This dog needs a job and needs to be worn out daily.

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THIS dog has heartworm and isn't able to be excited until quite awhile AFTER his treatment or he will have a heart attack and die and Val just lost a beloved dog a short time ago and can't go thru that again.

I realize that, but I hope the dog doesn't over-work its heart just by going crazy at home. There has to be a recommendation by a vet. That is a difficult predicament. Maybe some K9 calm homeopathic-type remedy for the time being, or maybe some melatonin until the heart is healed thoroughly? Can't the dog be walked without letting it run?

I'm just concerned that the key part of the puzzle is being missed that he has heartworm and is on treatment and can't be delibertly exercised.
I understand that the SA makes him excited so this really puts Val b/n a rock and a hard place and I don't envy her!
I've never had a dog with HW so this is definitly a "special case".
I hope Dasher is doing better Val.

Chica has separation anxiety also.She is almost 3 years old. She has torn up the carpet also, trying to get out of the bedroom, to look for me. So I never let her stay alone in the house anywhere except the kitchen.I have a safe place in the kitchen with no carpet, only tile flooring. Entrances to kitchen are gated. doors to pots and pans etc., are safety latched. She has her bed, food and water.Don't make it a big deal ever, when you leave the house! And when you return, don't make a big fuss! Just let the dog out of the room, and take her or him for a walk. ;) ;)

TOTALY aggree with lots of excersize! Remember excersizing your dog doesnt necessarily mean play fetch or run lots....take a nice steady paced walk, maybe a couple times a day for like half hour or so, trust me im sure you'll notice a change!! I personally dont like the metal cages, sometimes they can jiggle the latch and get out or get like a foot caught in between the bars..i really like the crate, you can get them at wal-mart, their alot cheaper there then like petco or petsmart! It's just a travel crate, but big enough to stand, lye down and turn around! cainan isnt a big fan of them, in the middle of the night and in the morning i always here him trying to dig his way out and chew on the metal door...but he's safe from hurting himself and possibly breaking out! i've never heard of a dog getting out of one of those...unless the door isnt latched all the way or the screws the hold the bottom and top together are on tightly! but anyways, good luck!!

When I made this thread, I forgot to state that I was aware the lack of exercise could be playing a factor in this. Until I'm sure he is 100 % cured of his heartworms, I can't pursue that. I'm working with him on small things like carrying my keys around at times, putting on shoes and not leaving. I also have a Kong that I give him when I leave, even though mom is home. I also don't greet him when I do get home. It's hard but I know that's important, as well as not making a big deal when I leave. I've got the Rescue Remedy stuff also. I did give him a bit but it seemed to make him pant more so I don't want to use it any more until I talk to the vet. As for the crate, I don't see how a plastic one can contain him if a metal one can't. I'll be keeping him in our bathroom with the understanding of possibly more damage. At least I know how to approach that now.
ETA: He chews and bites, so plastic would be useless.

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Originally Posted by dukedogsmom

When I made this thread, I forgot to state that I was aware the lack of exercise could be playing a factor in this. Until I'm sure he is 100 % cured of his heartworms, I can't pursue that. I'm working with him on small things like carrying my keys around at times, putting on shoes and not leaving. I also have a Kong that I give him when I leave, even though mom is home. I also don't greet him when I do get home. It's hard but I know that's important, as well as not making a big deal when I leave. I've got the Rescue Remedy stuff also. I did give him a bit but it seemed to make him pant more so I don't want to use it any more until I talk to the vet. As for the crate, I don't see how a plastic one can contain him if a metal one can't. I'll be keeping him in our bathroom with the understanding of possibly more damage. At least I know how to approach that now.

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well you did state that he bends the bars....well with the plastic ones there's nothing to bend! sure if bends a little if they lean on it but i then just goes right back into place...containing them more! i have all 3 of mine in them and i wouldnt recomend any different! worth a shot...if im wrong about urs then im wrong! but were just here for helpful tips and recommendations!

Oh Val, Poor Dasher, so many changes all at once for him!

I don't know anything about heartworm treatment. When you say no exercise until after that is all healed up, are we talking 2 weeks, 2 months? I have no idea what is involved.

I think the vet may have some suggestions and may be a good resource. Even the folks who wok there and answer the phone. Lots of them have pets themselves, and working where they do, they have ideas and suggestions.

I loved to read about the things you are doing, putting on your shoes to sit and watch TV, hoohoo!!! High heels, naturally, right?!! ;)

Best wishes, let us know how things progress!
Sandra

Freedom, it's for six weeks. All I can do is take him out to potty and that's it. I let him fetch just a few times last night because he loves it so much but I can't even do that after this treatment. There are two shots administered near the spine and from what I've read about it, they start killing the worms immediately. Then, the dead worms have to be filtered through the heart and lungs. That's why it's so important to keep him calm. I'm so glad that I work nights so I can be there for him when mom is gone. I'm not going to work too much on the SA while he's that sick. I do want to talk to the vet on Friday, though. He's young but is very knowlegable. I know he'll have some good suggestions on how to help Dasher through all this.

I'm glad you aren't listening to the advice to exercise. That would be disasterous. I agree that a good talk with your vet is in order. In this case, you might want to consider a tranqualizer until the heartworms are gone and you can begin an exercise program. However, a tranqualizer also might stress the heart, so have a good talk with your doctor. The extreme stress the dog is under when you leave is also a concern (as you know), and your vet will need to know this to help you develop a good plan for you and Dasher. You're being a good mom! :)

In pure honesty, I really believe crates act more like band-aids than training aids when dealing with SA. I speak from experience only so your pup might be different, but, in my experience, dogs with SA tend to react more when confined to a crate. It might not be the case with your pup, but being confined to a small space when all you want is OUT can result in a mangled crate and a possibly injured pup =/

Obviously, exercising isn't an option now but once he recovers from the treatment, I'm sure things will get better :) In the meantime, how about mental exercise? You could try teaching him to retrieve certain objects. I knew a Dane who knew how to differentiate objects by name and retrieved them for his owner. It's a greyt way to work their brains!

Time flies when you're having fun. Six weeks will be up before you know it. Then, of course, you know to start out slow with the exercise.

I thought about you and Dasher most of the night! He isn't the first dog to be put on "bed rest" and get bored, so there has to be ideas out there. I still think the vet is a good first start. I empathize with Dasher. At age 28 I got pneumonia and spent 9 weeks out of work and on bed rest. I was SO bored! Solitaire, cross words and word finders only kept me occupied for just so long!

I was wondering about a few things. First you know how at Thanksgiving we hear about the trypto . . . . (I can't remember the word) which is in turkey and makes us sleepy? Could you give him 2 or 3 slices of turkey about 15 minutes before you leave him, so he will be dozing? Not the sliced deli turkey as all that stuff is high in salt and probably not good (or ask the vet). But turkey breast.

If your back yard is enclosed, could you do a few games out there. I thought about "seek and find." Before he goes out, you put a few little piles of kibble here and there. Just 5 pieces or so. Once he is outside, he wanders about looking for the piles. Once he gets the hang of it, put them somewhere different. He is just walking about, not running or excited. Only problem I thought of is the time of year; what do you do to keep warm while he is sauntering about.

And I am not familiar with the "stuffed Kong" someone mentioned. But that or some other toy(s) that he ONLY gets while he is alone. So it is something new to keep his attention.

Best wishes!
Sandra