Would you be offended?

Last night I was talking with my mom and she said "Oh, did you know that <my childhood friend> had her baby this week?"

So I answered "No, I didn't! Is it male or female?"

My mom went off on me for using the terms male and female instead of "a boy or a girl". To me, well...that's just how I think. I wasn't trying to be offensive by using male and female, those are just the words that popped into my head.

Did I say something wrong?! Is it rude to refer to an infant as female instead of a girl?? (BTW, the baby is female, her name is Ella Marie) I'm really confused...if this is something that's going to be a problem, I want to avoid it in the future.

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Originally Posted by CathyBogart

Last night I was talking with my mom and she said "Oh, did you know that <my childhood friend> had her baby this week?"

So I answered "No, I didn't! Is it male or female?"

My mom went off on me for using the terms male and female instead of "a boy or a girl".

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I'd be a little miffed too.

After working in a hospital for a long time you see MALE, FEMALE and OTHER on any forms.....

You fogot one. ;)

I see! I really should have been more considerate. :)

I thought at first that she was annoyed with my use of the word "it" in the first sentence, that I should have said "is her baby..." Now I think I should have said "Oh, what was the gender?" to avoid any possible conflict.

I hate trying to make sure everything I say is totally PC. I'm nice, and polite, and I try not to say anything offensive.

I would not be offended by your question, but I must admit that I would have giggled. :p It is rather unusual to phrase it that way when talking about a human baby. I would probably have to tease you about being around animals too much. LOL :D

sounds like someone is a little too sensitive. :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by jenluckenbach

I would not be offended by your question, but I must admit that I would have giggled. :p It is rather unusual to phrase it that way when talking about a human baby. I would probably have to tease you about being around animals too much. LOL :D

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This is almost exactly what I was thinking, almost word for word. :)

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Originally Posted by jenluckenbach

I would not be offended by your question, but I must admit that I would have giggled. :p It is rather unusual to phrase it that way when talking about a human baby. I would probably have to tease you about being around animals too much. LOL :D

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LoL, it's probably the truth! I'm taking so many vet tech classes right now I have medical terminology swimming around in my head 24-7. :)

I too thought it was because you were around animals a lot, but definetely nothing to get offended about.

To be honest calling a baby a female and male is something I dont think I've ever done, I refer to them as a baby girl or baby boy and for a child older its a boy or man depending on the ages, It might just be a way of speech in London but I've never see anyone get upset over this, I can see where you are coming from though :)

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Originally Posted by Lady's Human

sounds like someone is a little too sensitive. :rolleyes:

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Exactly what I thought when I read this! I don't see why she would really care. I mean, you used a synonym instead. Does it really matter? It's like her being upset because you said large instead of big. :rolleyes:

I wouldn't worry about it, I wouldn't have been offended by it. (Come to think of it, had I been in your shoes, I probably would have said the same thing ;) )

I don't think I would have given it a second thought! Did your mom tell you why she was offended?

PS I also like pie :D

I never understand what these polls have to do with pie. :confused:

But of course, I like pie. ;) Especially Mile High Mud Pie from Montanas. MMMmmmmmm ! :D

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Originally Posted by JenBKR

I don't think I would have given it a second thought! Did your mom tell you why she was offended?

PS I also like pie :D

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She just told me that it was "inappropriate" to talk about human infants that way. :confused:

"pie" was how another forum I went to made the "other" option. I liked it, so I kept it. :)

Ah.... :)

I don't think you said anything wrong either. That is like someone said, would she get mad if you said something was large instead of big? Life is to short to get so picky about things like that. SHE should understand how you are when you work around animals that is the first choice of words to use so CHILL OUT!

It just goes to show how much of a pet lover you are. Most pets when they are born we say, Male or Female. lol I wouldn't lose any sleep over it.!!!

Yeah, The Baby was a Female!!! :D I don't have a problem with that phrase!!! ;) That means it was a girl, right? ;)

Loosen up Baby~~~ Life is just too short to sweat the small stuff
(oh, I need to tell you that :It's all small stuff) ;)

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Originally Posted by Lady's Human

sounds like someone is a little too sensitive. :rolleyes:

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AGREED lol

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Originally Posted by MajesticCollies

It just goes to show how much of a pet lover you are. Most pets when they are born we say, Male or Female. lol I wouldn't lose any sleep over it.!!!

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So that must be where I got it from. A couple months ago my cousin told me she was preggy and I asked her male or female, and she says "excuse me?". I really never gave it one thought. Whoops. So I guess us animal lovers have different brains!!

I don't really think I would care. How ae you gonna know if it offends your mom?? :p Although, I get mad when someone calls Sassy a "he". :D

I wouldn't be offended, but I suppose it's not the "traditional" way to refer to babies. Usually "It's a Boy!" or "It's a girl!" clues you into whether to send pink or blue (also a tradition). When I hear "male or female", I usually think of someone grown up, not babies. Guess your mom's a traditionalist, eh?

I think male/female are more rationally loaded terms, while boy/girl are emotionally loaded terms social wise. I wouldn't care either way, but some people think into it too much. I personally refer to animals as boy/girl and most people I know do also.

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Originally Posted by jenluckenbach

I would not be offended by your question, but I must admit that I would have giggled. :p It is rather unusual to phrase it that way when talking about a human baby. I would probably have to tease you about being around animals too much. LOL :D

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I'll agree with this. I think someone was too sensitive.

I'm sorry but I fell about laughing when I read this :D "male or female?" spoken like a true animal lover

I think that I would NOT be offended! For heavens sake!!!!! :confused:

Well, I'm glad to know that I didn't say anything too offensive. :) I guess I'll be more careful in the future, just in case

I wouldn't even have noticed if someone said that. But, then again, I have been known to refer to babies as "it." :o Oops.

I like coconut cream pie.

I might have teased you, but, I wouldn't have gotten upset. But, I still say "he" when I don't know the gender, because that used to be the way you did it...now, you have to say he/she, but, I'm not all that politically correct, so, I still say "he" if I don't know, or if whatever you're talking about could be referring to either gender.

Vanilla ice cream for me, and my male baby! :D

I don't think your mom should have gotten so offended by that. I mean even on application forms and stuff like that they ask if you are a male or female. I mean a boy is male, and a girl is a female. It's inevitable and undeniable logic. I agree with Lady's Human, definitely sounds like she was too sensitive. I don't think you have to worry a whole lot about this being a problem in the future :).

I voted no - obviously - but I also love pumpkin pie so it was quiet a hard decision :p.

Nah, you didn't say anything wrong! Just don't worry about it. I don't find it at all offensive, and I'm 53 years old.

Willie :)