Binx is at the RB...

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I feel like I have betrayed Binx, that I was the one person that said I would love him forever, and 'fix' him. Then, I changed my mind. I hurt so bad over my decision. I can only pray that this was in his best interest, and where ever he is, he knows I love him tremendously, and wanted nothing but the best for him. Sadly, I will have this on my conscience for the rest of my life. That still won't make it right.

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I'm so sorry. Sometimes we do all we can do, and it's not enough. But, sometimes it IS enough, and we just can't see it because it's not the particular "enough" we had in our mind's eye.

You did not betray him, you stood by him to the end. You will love him forever. You did fix him - somewhere he is healthy and happy tonight.

Dogs aren't like people, in the fact that we can reason, understand and make a logical informed choice, with our eye on the future. If a person has cancer, they can understand the probable sucess rate of chemo vs. surgery vs. nothing, and make a choice based on quality and quantity of life. Dogs can't. They live almost 100% in the present - the past is very short and dim, and the future is practically nonexistent. The dog lying on his back in the sun is 100% THERE - in the sun, happy, warm. He's not regretting something he did yesterday, or worrying about something that might happen tomorrow. He just ... is. What a freeing, wonderful thing that would be ... to just ... be. If a dog lives 20 years or 4 weeks ... they don't know it. They have no concept of mortality, death, fairness or fate. They just ... are. It's all good to them, whether it is short in our eyes or not.

Twisterdog,

That is a great thing to say ....... I never really thought of it that way ...........

Makes me want to be a dog ............. :)

{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}} Johanna ..... we are thinking of you

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Originally posted by Twisterdog


Dogs aren't like people, in the fact that we can reason, understand and make a logical informed choice, with our eye on the future. If a person has cancer, they can understand the probable sucess rate of chemo vs. surgery vs. nothing, and make a choice based on quality and quantity of life. Dogs can't. They live almost 100% in the present - the past is very short and dim, and the future is practically nonexistent. The dog lying on his back in the sun is 100% THERE - in the sun, happy, warm. He's not regretting something he did yesterday, or worrying about something that might happen tomorrow. He just ... is. What a freeing, wonderful thing that would be ... to just ... be. If a dog lives 20 years or 4 weeks ... they don't know it. They have no concept of mortality, death, fairness or fate. They just ... are. It's all good to them, whether it is short in our eyes or not.

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Twisterdog, that is so true. I wanted to tell Johanna the same thing but couldn't figure how to put it in a way that would be comforting to her.

Johanna, don't feel guilty. You have nothing to feel guilty about. You did NOT betray Binx. Please don't think that way. What you did was in the best interest of Binx. You made the best decision you possibly could.

{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}

I am so terribly sorry to hear of Binx's passing. You were a wonderful mother to him, and for that he is greatful. Take care, and please if you just want to talk or anything know that I am here. :(

RIP Binx! :(

If you get a chance, please say hello to Mystic for me, and my Pooka girl. I know you will make good friends with them. :)

Johanna,

I'm so sorry to hear about Binx, I know I'll miss hearing about and him and seeing his sweet loveable face. Never think that you failed him, you took him in a gave him a loving home and a chance that he might not have had before.

R.I.P. Binx

Twisterdog, wow! Powerful words. Really something to think about. Helps a lot of us who have had or will have to make difficult choices put things more into perspective. Sometimes, because our pets become such real companions - people- to us we think they can think and reason the way we do. If you ever watch a dog dig a hole after he was just punished for doing so or watched a dog eat all the food that is there never worrying about would there be more for tomorrow or run away not knowing sure if they will know their way back, you know they do not worry about things the way we do. They live in the now, the moment. I am not saying we should put dogs down randomly because whatever we gave them was enough, but when a dog has some major problem and there seems to be no answer that will not mean much more pain or a fix that would enhance his life, we should not feel guilty that we had to make a choice that we did not want to make.

And as you so aptly put

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They have no concept of mortality, death, fairness or fate. They just ... are. It's all good to them, whether it is short in our eyes or not.

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Thanks, Twisterdog!

I am so sorry about Binx! My heart go's out to you.:(

Johanna,
I can't tell you enough how sorry I am. We all wish we could take your pain away.

As much as we want to take your pain away... we know that's also what you wanted to do for Binx... and you did!!!

You have filled his life and heart with so much love and joy! God Bless you!! I do not think any different of you.
You did what was right for Binx!

Binx is there now at RB... enjoying the life you've always wanted for him!

Johanna.... after each surgery... all you wanted was for him to be "fix".... and now he is!

You and Binx are in my prayers!!




GOD BLESS YOU BINX!!!! HAVE FUN!!!

Johanna

I am not sure that I can say anything that has not been said. I am able to understand your pain and your second thoughts. If you need us call us.

Unable to put my feelings into words I made this. It is not much, but it is how I feel

https://home.comcast.net/~kendallsca...20tribute1.jpg

Oh my!! Such beautiful and heartwarming posts! Twisterdog, that was BRILLIANT! Big Bad Dog, how touching. Tears still flowing. Hugs to you, Johanna. You did all that you could.

I read this thread nearly every hour...to stay connected to Binx, to remember, to gain strength from your posts. I can't always respond, as I can truly hardly function. Just know everyone of your posts, and you as people, matter a great deal to me. I appreciate your support, and would appreciate both Binx and I remaining in your prayers.
Sadly,
Johanna

oohhhh Just when I thought I was done crying. I see Mike's signature. That was beautiful!
{{{Johanna and the Herd}}}

Johanna, we're praying, honey, not so much for Binx now, as we know he is just fine, but for you to find some peace with your decision. Lots and lots of Pet Talk prayers coming your way. Hang in there. I hope that every single day will get easier for you.

Mike, thank you for that lovely post. You too, Twisterdog. :)

Johanna, the decison you made was made with love and much soul searching and reflection. There is not a person who has read of your accounts of all the efforts and endeavors on behalf of Binx who could think otherwise. Unfortunately as much as we would like to come up with solutions to all the problems we are faced with, reality slaps us in the face with...well, reality. The time Binx had with you was a gift, the love Binx had from you was a gift. In the end even the decision you made for him was a gift because it was the best you could do for him. That is all any of us can do for the ones we love. I personally know how hard it is to make this type of decision. Not making it doesn't seem right nor does making seem right, so in the end we just do the best we can.

Johanna,

Diana told me about Binx last night and I was very sorry to hear the news. As I read your post this morning, this month's quote on my Airdale calendar came to mind. It is by Robert Louis Stevenson and it goes: "You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us." In my mind's eye Binx is in heaven and it looks a lot like the Findlay dog park. Binx is happlily chasing the butterfly that just landed on his nose. May these joyful thoughts help console you in your time of sorrow and grief.

Fivedogdad