That is actually a big misconception people have, as it isn't true at all. ;) Its actually against the laws of Islam for a man and woman to be forced into marriage, or not be allowed to see/get to know each other before marriage. If a girl is forced to marry someone she doesn't wish to marry, the marriage contract is considered invalid. Both the guy and the girl have to want it. There are people who arrange marriages and force it on their kids, but that's not from Islam...its more a cultural thing, and done by people who are ignorant about their faith's teachings. It works more like...the parents help their kids find someone, or someone in the family/circle of friends refers someone to someone else. Then, the girl/guy get to know each other in an appropriate setting (in front of a third person...not alone), and if both wish to get married, they get married. If not, either man or woman is free to reject the 'marriage candidate'. I don't know why people think Muslims have their daughters marry anyone THEY want, without her consent, because that isn't true. That is a cultural thing that is done by SOME people in Asia, Africa, the Middle East, etc. despite their religion. It truly depends on the family, but when going by religious rules, the guy and girl have to get to know each other/make the decision for themselves, though the family helps/supports/plays a role in having a part in their kids' marriages. We have parental guidance, love, and support throughout the process. I personally 'like' having their guidance/advice in this, as they have more of a life experience than me, and thus, have more wisdom on what is better for me. He and I totally got to know each other well enough/made the decision without pressure from anyone else. ;) I can't imagine marrying someone I didn't know or have feelings for...:eek: That's freaky. LOL! It doesn't work that way, unless the marriage is being done by people with WEIRD cultural traditions that are not derived from religion. There's no room for forced marriages in Islam. Its not allowed.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom
BTW...the marrying legally before living together is not a necessity. We'd be 'married' once we have the contract and can be together. Its just that some people feel more comfortable doing it this way, and in our case, its best that he finishes studying/has a job before we're together and ready to handle all the responsibilities that come with married life. It works both ways.
