Cat Haiku

my dad tricked me bad,
last friday i thought he was
talking politics :rolleyes:
-----------
he talked about the
BAATH party, i thought the war
was over for now! :)
-----------
saddam was gone and
so was that political
party that he ran....
-----------
sunday he picked me
up and put me into the
shower while it ran
------------
what a dirty trick!!!!:eek:
he did not mean BAATH party!
he meant BATH party..:eek:
------------
I was the guest at
my very own 'BATH PARTY'
i misunderstood:(
------------
thinking about it.....
he said, 'giving the cat a
BATH IS NO PARTY'


to be continued!!!

Richard:

Your pieces of prose are profusely profound and makes me ponder the prevailing purpose of people.....

and Richard, never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you..... giving your cat a baath party? How troublesome you treacherous troubadour:cool:
L

bath party? i want
to get out of this shower.
i do not like water:eek:

dad's in the shower
trying to calm me down some
i want out of here!:mad:

what's in that bottle
what are you putting on me?
that are those bubbles?:confused:

what is this foam for?
MEOW MEOW (please, help me:o)
why are you laughing????:mad:

someone please help me
i'm wet and covered in foam
bath party? never again!!!:eek:

look at me, my fur
is all wet, you are laughing
and i am mad now!!!

that is more like it
turn the water off, and get
me out of this place:eek:

yes, i do smell good
what are you doing with that
towel in your hands????????


coming soon...the antics of a clean cat!

Poor Eddie was fooled
And bathtime is not cat fun
Recover in peace!

electricity-
the static kind-has turned my
white cat, gray again...

:rolleyes:

my clean cat attracts
over 10 percent of the
dust inside my home
---------------

a clean cat can be
considered a dust magnet
white shows the dirt well.:rolleyes:
---------------

a fluffy tail used
on items left on a shelf
picks up dirt the best
:confused:

Eddie - a new career!
You should work as a tester
For Oreck vacuums!

All dust shows up on
Your handsome white coat, so this
Should earn you some cash!

What will Eddie buy
With all that money - fish, Pounce
Or other good treats?

should the Oreck gig
fall thru, I could go to work
for Hilton Hotels! ;)

-------------

the biggest problem
is getting dad to take the
cobwebs off my head!!

A cat like Tigris
-gray like the dust- makes most of
the dustbunnies here.

You can find Tigris'
underwool fluffy and light
in every corner.

Tigris and Eddie
one making -one removing
would make a good team:D

Mother's Day Haiku from the Cat:

Nice lady pets me
Scoops the poop out of my box
I call her Mommy.

my dad was real sick
i cured him with some lap time
and kitty kisses:D

thank you Pet Talkers
dad brought me the gifts you sent-
cat nip and some toys.

i climbed in the bags
played with the wrapping foil
so much simple fun!:D

i batted around
the cat nip mouses and chased
the balls all around:eek:

but i've kept my dad
awake at night while under
the spell of cat nip!!!:eek: ;) :D :cool:

dad says your catnip
kept him awake but it was
his margaritas

fun, margaritas
talking and laughing - much too
exciting to sleep

you will now groom him
soothing his headache just stay
close to him in bed;)

my magic carpet
was once my dad's beach towel-
love to sleep on it
-----
i love the colors
dark green fish, light green fishies
but what is a beach?
-----
dad says there's water
i really don't like that thought:eek:
but the sand sounds good:D
-------
a huge litter box
stretching miles and miles
cat heaven on earth!!:cool:
------
i dream of the beach
carried on that huge towel
to the water's edge.
------
oh, oh, thats too close!
maybe i'd be safer on
the sand next to dad.:p
------
dozing in the sun
watching the seagulls flying
the people surfing:confused:
-------
sometimes i cannot
dream, my huge towel is in
the washing machine!:mad: :( :eek:
-------
i have to remind
my dad that i cannot sleep
without my towel
-------
poor dad i know he
likes his huge towel, but he
likes me even more!
:D :cool: ;) :p

Well done, RICHARD! :D

"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb

eddie wants to know....

a cat's paw in space?
i have a hard enough time
staying on the floor
------
maybe, dogs in space..
the size of the cat that left
those prints up in space!!:eek:
------
how long is his tail?
and the whiskers he must have!
the size of his bowl?
------
but my question is
does a cat that size have a
real big litter box?????:eek:

Optics

I can't reach the top!
Telescope kitty stretches
just a bit longer.


Magnetism

The darker the cloth
the easier it attracts
the hair of white cats.

Inertia

External forces
only move a resting cat.
Just open a food tin!

From Mimi:

Why does he chase me?
I have been here the longest
Zip, please go away

a napping kitty
has potential energy-
waiting for release!

a runnning cat has
kinetic energy-watch
them run thru the house!:eek: :rolleyes: :D :confused:

A cat teeters on the edge
The smell of ammonia is strong
Time to change the litterbox

the cold weather comes
my cat gets closer to me
just to steal my heat

you walk on my bed
searching for that one warm spot
please don't wake me up

you finally find
the place to sleep, is it warm
enough for you, cat???

I gave dad a scare
I wasn't feeling myself-
did not want to play

Just wanted to sleep
I didn't want to be held
Please leave me alone! :(

My grandma noticed
that I wasn't feeling well-
had a tummy ache......

My dad had noticed
that my tummy was swollen
(he thinks I'm a pig):eek:

So to feel better
I used my litter box then
went to the corner

I threw up something
that puzzled my dad alot-:confused:
not hair and not toys-

Please don't tell him
I ate some chicken grandma
had left on her plate

He thinks I have good
breeding and table manners.....
that's just our secret!;)

Richard, the artist formerly known as the "Prince of Prose".:) :)

what are you doing?
it's a puppy in my house!!:eek:
a german shepherd....

a little girl dog
without asking me, how rude
she's not cute at all

I hissed at that dog:mad:
She drank from my bowl, ate too!
I stayed on the bed:confused:

I don't share my bowls
my house, treats or my master.
Boy, she has some nerve....

every ten minutes
I had to see where she was-
asleep in her cage:rolleyes:

I am not stupid
I am not going near that dog....
I don't play with dogs.

Then the door opened-
They came to pick up the dog:)
she is not staying!!!!!!

Could we get a dog?
the kind with stuffing inside?
that's the dog for us!!

lailamara-you did good!--I loved it! It was so sweet! that just made my day!
good job!!....
did you do it yourself??

~**!Look Down!**~


There it is!
That Little critter.......
Ready,Set,Pounce!

Yes! Yes! Yes!
I got it!
Uhh-Ohh........

I am the center
of the universe my cat
happens to live in

The cold weather comes
forcing him to circle me
like a small planet

It's not gravity
that puts him into a
still smaller orbit

He follows that path,
a heat seeking projectile
awating impact

I will awaken
that night-from a deep slumber
the cat has landed

for a few hours
we symbiotically
exist on the bed

sleeping cat planet
absorbing my body heat-
weighs my body down

Rising morning sun
brings us out of bed
where we break contact

back into orbit
until the cool night brings
us back together.

The warm body parts
on my dad are his arms, legs
both of his shoulders


My dad can toss, turn
all night long, I move around
looking for that place


That really warm spot
where I can park my body
until morning comes:D

One ton of trouble,
packed into a ten pound cat.
Are all cats like that?

Sorry no Haikus from me.

I must say however that there are some pretty talented Haiku writters around here. It took me a while but I finally made it thorugh all of them.

Thanks to everyone, they were all good.:D:D:D

The cat may have eight
or fourteen pounds -in there is
one ton of trouble.

Leila thought of a good one even though this thread is sooo long.


Meow meow purrrrrrr
Get your lazy head out of
my bed now Now NOW!

This is my sunshine
My warm spot on a cold day
Do not disturb me

You're jealous of my
Gift of turning sunlight in
to tranquility

Go, silly human,
Rake leaves, do your pointless chores
Let me nap in peace.

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Barbara
The cat may have eight
or fourteen pounds -in there is
one ton of trouble.

---

One ton of trouble
is nine hundred nine kilos
of METRIC trouble!!!
;)

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Karen

Go, silly human,
Rake leaves, do your pointless chores
Let me nap in peace.

---

Cats do not sleep! They
visualize the job done.
Naps trump raking leaves!

grams of white cat hair
all over the place, on clothes
shirts, shorts and jackets

ounces of mischief
knocking over dad's knick knacks
and some other stuff

Pounds of kitty scat
dad is always cleaning up
after my rear end

tons of real fun
keeping dad on his toes and
making him laugh loud.:D

I do believe we are getting to know Eddie as well as we do you, Richard ;) and that can be scary :eek: Can one know a cat.. ever? Can one know Richard.. hmmm A point to ponder :rolleyes:

Eddie is a riddle.
Who is more of a riddle?
He or dad Richard?

A riddle to solve.
But there is no solution.
Both guys are poets:)

yea Barbara! You said it much better than I.........

Quote:

---

Originally posted by RICHARD
grams of white cat hair
all over the place, on clothes
shirts, shorts and jackets

---

White hair on black shirts
a classic contrast- Eddie
knows about fashion.

Tigris' ticked hair:
the tips go with light clothes
the bottom with dark:D