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Cass my dear you are anything but stupid, that was my whole point really, I think I know what a great girl you are, and it just saddens me to think you would do this to yourself,I tend to agree with you , that you must have some issues, that is what I was trying to say, before you find it necessary to do this to yourself.
Cass you know I think the world of you, so please don't feel I am getting at you, I am just trying to get my head around it all and come out with some understanding.:)
Carole, I thought the same thing too. I don't think she is stupid at all! She is very smart, bright and beautiful, inside and out. :)
Quote:
Originally posted by luckies4me
I just consider it something I do because I'm stupid. :p Why do people turn themselves into tigers? There really is no need. I just do it to do it I guess. I used to do it out of frustration just so I could feel the pain and I would go deeper, but now I just do it for the heck of it. I don't know, I have issues! :p
Self injury is not done by stupid people, it's done by seriously
disturbed people. It is not normal and is usually a sign of more
serious issues below the surface.
I'm surprised to see you admit to this publicly and you may yet
decide to delete your previous posts, but it seems like a real
call for help. It would do you good to go see a professional
health care worker to talk about this. I don't think your life is
at all what you want it to be right now and you would benefit
from professional help. Good Luck.
Quote:
Originally posted by lizbud
Self injury is not done by stupid people, it's done by seriously
disturbed people. It is
I don't think its done by disturbed people. Maybe its just me but I don't think "disturbed" discribes it well. I think its done by people that need some help, there not 'disturbed' there just upset.
Disturbed is basically someone whom is emotionally/mentally upset, so I do believe disturbed is a correct term to describe people who "Self Injure" themselves.
There is no need for me to do it again, so really I don't have to. Yes I do have issues, but so does everyone. I am not perfect. ;) And I'm not seriously disturbed either. But if you feel that way that's just you and there is nothing I can do about it. I've only done it about 4 times and I don't mind telling because I don't really care. It's not a big deal to me.
I won't do it around my son because I don't see why I would EVER do that. Some people just like certain things others don't. Why do people get surface piercings, or hang themselves up by metal hooks through their back? Again, what's normal to you might not be normal to someone else, so why fret what others think? ;) I don't think I need help for giving myself tiny scratches. That's a little overboard I think. :rolleyes:
Thats' just my point. "Needs" should be expressed verbally not
expressed as an action of self injury. You should talk to someone
( a professional) who can help you see that.
Actually, I've been looking into some help recently anyway, so if I do have a problem I am sure they would be able to help me. :)Quote:
Originally posted by lizbud
Thats' just my point. "Needs" should be expressed verbally not
expressed as an action of self injury. You should talk to someone
( a professional) who can help you see that.
I think that there are lots of things to worry about more than cutting, unless it becomes frequent and severe. The release I got from self injury during my teen years kept me alive, I believe. It's not a healthy action, but all of us have quirks.
Sometimes I would imagine my internal pain as an actual substance--and that it had to be "let out." Deep feelings of rage, anger, and hurt would dissipate with just a few slices with my "cutting glass." I honestly don't know where else I could have gone in my darkest times.
How can this be condemned?
Yes, people who self harm have emotional problems but that doesn't make them crazy....granted some are but generally they aren't. I really don't think a lot of people understand it. Again, they never learned positive coping methods, or they did but they choice to use self harm instead. Here is a list of reasons that I found that people self injure. I don't think it should be condemned because in a way you are condemning the person doing it, but it also shouldn't be encouraged.
Escape from emptiness, depression, and feelings of unreality.
Easing tension.
Providing relief: when intense feelings build, self-injurers are overwhelmed and unable to cope. By causing pain, they reduce the level of emotional and physiological arousal to a bearable one.
Relieving anger: many self-injurers have enormous amounts of rage within. Afraid to express it outwardly, they injure themselves as a way of venting these feelings.
Escaping numbness: many of those who self-injure say they do it in order to feel something, to know that they're still alive.
Grounding in reality, as a way of dealing with feelings of depersonalization and dissociation
Maintaining a sense of security or feeling of uniqueness
Obtaining a feeling of euphoria
Preventing suicide
Expressing emotional pain they feel they cannot bear
Obtaining or maintaining influence over the behavior of others
Communicating to others the extent of their inner turmoil
Communicating a need for support
Expressing or coping with feelings of alienation
Validating their emotional pain -- the wounds can serve as evidence that those feelings are real
Continuing abusive patterns: self-injurers tend to have been abused as children.
Punishing oneself for being "bad"
Obtaining biochemical relief: there is some thought that adults who were repeatedly traumatized as children have a hard time returning to a "normal" baseline level of arousal and are, in some sense, addicted to crisis behavior. Self-harm can perpetuate this kind of crisis state
Diverting attention (inner or outer) from issues that are too painful to examine
Exerting a sense of control over one's body
Preventing something worse from happening
I have to say that I agree. No one should ever drink, smoke, do drugs, get tattoos or piercings, or cut themselves in order to deal with their emotions. There are right and wrong ways to deal with emotions. I'm not criticizing at all, like I said, I've gotten a tattoo for every miscarriage. The bottom line is like lizbud said...It's not normal. There is nothing ok or right about damaging your body for the sake of releasing emotions.Quote:
Originally posted by lizbud
Self injury is not done by stupid people, it's done by seriously
disturbed people. It is not normal and is usually a sign of more
serious issues below the surface.
I'm surprised to see you admit to this publicly and you may yet
decide to delete your previous posts, but it seems like a real
call for help. It would do you good to go see a professional
health care worker to talk about this. I don't think your life is
at all what you want it to be right now and you would benefit
from professional help. Good Luck.
This is NOT true. Most of these people don't have an outlet to recieve help. In the case with my "child", the only adults in her life were beating her! She struggled with a ton of emotional problems, only to be called "psycho" at school when she tried to seek help.Quote:
Originally posted by Kfamr
Those who do cut/self injure themselves need a LOT of help, but the fact is a lot of them are too stubborn to recieve it.
Do not generalize about something you don't understand.
This is totally sad. Especially for the kids/people that are depressed clinically and have valid reasons for their emotional pain.Quote:
Yeah, it is sort of a trend. There seems to be an epidimic out there where kids thrive off of being angry and depressed.
miranda- What you last posted was very helpful! I actually was reminded of an anorexic I once knew who has since died of from her lack of eating- her controlling of food seems to meet many of the criteria you listed.
I worked with only one cutter in my time with my work with the mentally ill. (As a promenant feature). She was very independent and well into her 40's. She cut her arms both on the inside and out. A lot. So much that I couldn't tell what was new and what was old from day to day. I checked her arms daily before and after she left home, and sometimes her arms were so raw, there was no way for me to know if she had "recently" cut (like within the last day or hour etc). She experienced (she said) flashbacks constantly of her being abused by her father. This was before Geodone and Abilify that have helped people with flashes.
I now see a woman now who has less flashbacks than ever (used to be daily) and she has a history of "trying" to cut (an urge) but hasn't. She is in her 40's and her father had sex with her from age 7 on into her teens. Her head is dented from when he smashed her head with a baseball bat. She is blind in one eye from this. She has never cut herself and I think she is one of the most heroic women I have ever met! She has problems but is dealing with them through therapy very consistently! (DBT therapy- esp. designed for ptsd)
Quote:
Originally posted by NoahsMommy
Do not generalize about something you don't understand.
I understand it quite well, I just don't understand why or how someone is capable of doing it.
I know that sometimes I just accidently cut myself with something, and it could be the tiniest little scratch, and it hurts like all heck. How someone could do something like that - purposefully to themselves is just beyond me.
But then again, I guess some people would think i'm clinicly insane for spending time with and hugging my dogs when I'm upset. I guess that just feels good for me, like cutting feels for cutters... although my outlet hurts in no way.
I know many people who do this, some of them being my best friend/s.
And I didn't say ALL of them were too stubborn to recieve help. I said a lot of them, and that's TRUE according to the children in my school.
You've got to admit. A large amount of teenagers and pre-teens are very stubborn. I'll admit being so. :p