He/She is out to lunch without a sandwich. :rolleyes: (Note: the eye roll is a part of the phrase, you must do that after you say the phrase.)
Open mouth, insert foot, bite down . . . HARD! (What I often do!)
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He/She is out to lunch without a sandwich. :rolleyes: (Note: the eye roll is a part of the phrase, you must do that after you say the phrase.)
Open mouth, insert foot, bite down . . . HARD! (What I often do!)
I heard this one today, on a news program that was going to commercial.
"We have breaking news up after the break."
Right.......:D
Sometimes I can be like a parrot and just spew nonsense that I think is funny, it happens without me thinking a lot. Most of them come from TV shows or stupid Youtube videos. One such phrase is from a skit with my favorite comedian.
"Hello everybody, I'm a goldfish!" (Rik Mayall) video
"I'm a love albatross!" and "Righty dokie skip!" (Ade Edmonson as Eddie in Bottom)
I do, I do ... "Johnny, you're 42 years old and she's still running your life!" Now I'm going to have to rent it again :)Quote:
Originally Posted by elizabethann
"Never try to teach a pig to sing. It will only waste your time and annoy the pig."
"Never meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger" and the related: "Never meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and go good with ketchup."
"Time wounds all heels!" - Grouch Marx.
"He couldn't hit water if he fell out of a boat" - Baseball's Tommy Lasorda, on a player who wasn't hitting at the time.
"Whoa, Nellie!" - Dick Lane, broadcaster.
"Don't worry, it's a long way from your heart." -On getting a booboo and-
"Whatcha got, hot rod?" -R.V.
"This is not our planet, Monkey Boy!" - Buckaroo Banzai.
One for the carpenters, from my dad: "He's half a bubble off plumb."
"My sponsor told me not to let my mind wander...it's too little to be outside by itself."
"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"
"God is easier to get along with than a lot of people would like to think. I mean, come on, any Creator who allowed the duck-billed platypus...":D
From a musician friend: "As nervous as a bag of wet squirrels."
Richard, thank you so much for starting this thread! I have to keep checking in with the sayings people are sharing, and wow, there are some great ones.
Hrm... let's see... about men who are handsome but lacking in the most important way
"He may be easy on the eyes, but damn, he's as dumb as a stick."
Dumb as a box of rocks (another teacher uses that one)
Not the brightest crayon in the box (art teacher)
Usually any That 70's shows lines like "Eric, you don't have bad luck son, you're just a dumbass. (I tend to say dumbass quite frequently.
Oh, and my typical line after a friend or a kid said something really really stupid, and they know they said somehting stupid ... "LEAN IN..." and they know what comes next... ME, slapping them upside the head for their stupidity, lol. Never hard, but they know, and I'll get soem who say "Come on, you know what you have to do now!"
It's fun!
:D:D:D I definitely have to remember this one.Quote:
"My sponsor told me not to let my mind wander...it's too little to be outside by itself."
And on the heels of this one:Quote:
Not the brightest crayon in the box
One wheel stuck in the sand
One brick short of a load
Not the sharpest pencil in the box
His/her elevator doesn't go to the top floor
The light's on but nobody's home
He/she's not playing with a full deck
Those are only a few that I can remember. I'm sure there's alot more.
One of my faves is
"They are looking for three legs on a cat, but they are gonna find four!
This is from my mom - I only wish I had listened to her when I was younger...
If you can't be good, be careful.;)
*You don't have to be a weather man to know which way the wind is blowing.*
Best when said to someone who tries to intimidate you by his *expertise*.
My boss' favorite one is "the devil is in the details." We hear this almost every time there is an office meeting. :rolleyes:
I really wish I could take credit for this one.
I was in the produce department of the supermarket and there was a woman with two kidsr. They were not misbehaving or acting up.......
She was trying to get their attention so she could move on so she says playfully to them. "Come on, Children of the Corn!"
COTC was a short story and later a movie from Stephen King-it was about a town where evil children were in charge and would kill adults that came into town or anyone of their group that turned 18.
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I looked at her and started to laugh...she saw me and got embarrassed....she began to apologize and I told her that it was O.K. I just never had heard anyone call their kids that.
Now when I see any kids acting badly I whisper under my breath.....Children of the Corn!!