Yikes! Just had a look - answered "yes" to too many questions........
Thank you
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Yikes! Just had a look - answered "yes" to too many questions........
Thank you
Believe me Karen, the children do understand. I knew everyone elses parents were not like mine and I never brought friends home. On garbage day, when the truck would come, our garbage can was full of whiskey bottles and beer cans. A garbage can of beer cans sound so different than regular household garbage and I was ashamed for the garbage men to see me. I played outside a lot because the house smelled of the booze and it stunk to me.Quote:
Both are adult topics, topics that children needn't read or try to understand.
Thing is, I never thought it was my fault, it was just what they did and while it had a impact on my life as a child, the only emotion I ever felt about it was shame. I never felt cheated or mad at them for what they did either. My parent we just my parents and I loved them no matter what they did.
On a lighter side, since we have grown up, us kids have talked about our lives as children of alcoholics and my little brother who never says how he feels about anything made the remark, that while we didn't have the greatest parents or "things" life had to offer, what he has seen as a policeman has made him realize we REALLY had it GOOD! I have also learned that just by seeing people and how some of people live.... if you can call it living. We always felt loved and that is all I cared about.
Karen KNOWS that kids need to know - but Pet Talk is not the place for them to learn.
Alateen, guidance counsellors. etc
Catty1
Keep it up everyone! I'm not an alcoholic, but my dad is a recovering alcoholic and most of his family are still on the bottle so I have seen the struggle.
As for kids reading this, I have known many "kids" that were in AA before they were 21. For me, it's not unheard of to hear of kids at 12 and 13 drinking anymore. To be honest, if you are old enough to be on PT, then you are old enough to already have a problem. It's sad, but true.
That's okay, just be honest. It's a step in the right direction. Now be sure to go back to that site and find out some more. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Brody's Mum
Hello.
I'm a member of Pet Talk but like Odaat,I've created an anonymous id. I trust that Paul and Karen will respect me enough to not reveal my identity,as I know they have ways of finding out.
I drink at night,every night. Most times I go through 1/2 bottle at night. I do work,and so far no-one knows. Not myfamily,not my friends. I want to quit,Iwant to save money. Help me please.
If you want to stop, admitting that is the first step, right? You've done that, right now, to us.
Have you been to an AA meeting? You can go and just observe, you don't need to "spill your guts" right away.
Congratulations! You've just taken the first step. I've heard it said in AA meetings, if you THINK you have a problem, you do. The good news is that we're here to help.Quote:
Originally Posted by Anon
To our dear PT friends who are struggling,
YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE, AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS ALONE.
Here is the home website of AA:
http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org
please check it out, you'll find some information that can help you figure out how to get in touch with your local AA. Check your local newspaper, phone book for AA. If there's a hotline number, call it. you don't have to identify yourself, just explain what you did here.
Please don't feel like you are intruding, one of the most important things we alcoholics do to stay sober is to help the next alcoholic. Really, you are helping US by asking for help.
I'm so glad this thread got started, so many people struggle with this.
I think this is a wonderful thread!
I don't drink, never have & never will. I hate booze to no end, but for different reasons then some on here.
I only remember 1 thing about my dad's dad, & that he drank a bottle of Vodka daily. I also remember the first day I met my grandfather. I was about 4 or 5yrs old, My grandpa asked me where we kept the sugar (we had sooo many cupboards!!) I hopped up onto the counter like I always did (parents show me how to do it safely, so I would have the urge to play on them) & took out the sugar only to get a slap in the face! I loathed everything about my grandfather after that. I have never been hit like that before, esp. for something I didn't do wrong. Luckly he lived 2000km away & I never had to see or deal with him. I think I saw him a total of 10 times in my 15 years (he died a slow painful death & was still bitter, right to the end), he was the type of person who would never go to an AA meeting.
My mom's dad was an alcie aswell, except he was much nicer & easier to get along with when he had a beer in him. Its when he had several beers it became an issue, mostly a cost issue. I've never seen him yell or touch a sole, but grandma hated him drinking, & that rubbed off onto me, as Grandma was the only person I was able to talk to when I was younger.
I watched my younger sister hit rock bottom at only 14yrs old! She never had a strong will & when she drank, she felt good (so she claims!). One night she was drunk & stoned (I've told the story before so I'll keep it super short), she started a fight with me (I did try to avoid it), I beat the snot out of her & made her an ugly mess, cause the more she tried to fight me, the harder & faster I punched. It was aweful, I was the sober one & I'm the one who lost total control for a moment.
Luckly the outcome was wonderful. My life didn't change 1 bit, except for my hate of booze, I just hated it even more! But my sisters life turned right around & for the better! She doesn't do freaky drugs anymore, just pot on holidays (which I can live with, but still dissagree) & has her drinking 100% under control now!! She only drinks a little on holidays & refuses to get drunk! Its been about a good 5-4 years since shes gotten drunk & the amount she consumes is still getting smaller & smaller. We get along now & chit chat on the phone & MSN almost daily! We never did that before.
I always knew it was the booze that controls people & that its very hard for people to overpower the booze. Thats why I hate booze & not really the people (except my grandfather, he cared only for his drink & nothing more)
My Dad was a very mellow drunk. He was VERY depressed, so he drank himself numb. He'd sit in his chair and cry about my Mom and stepmom and how much he loved them both. It killed me to watch him kill himself.
I recall years ago when our family (all uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents, etc.) used to drive out to Bolton Lake on the weekends. We'd have cookouts, go swimming, hiking. They were my fondest memories because, as Laura's Babies said, I always felt loved. Even though it WAS through an acoholic haze. Back then there WERE no laws against drunk driving. Not as strict as now. They thought nothing of packing everyone up and driving home after a day of drinking. I don't think I ever remember any of my family members actually sober.
I just stumbled across this thread..no pun intended.
Now I feel kinda guilty for doing the Thursday's thing.
I admire everyone that has posted their thoughts on the subject.
(Another reason that PT is the ONLY website I frequent....Constantly evolving and you never know what you will find here.)
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I posted about finding PT after a particularly troubled 6 months in my life.
I drank quite a bit and after a few months found the best "group therapy"
on the planet.
PT started out like a sip, then a shot-
half filled tumbler-hold the ice, please? And finally, I do it in huge gulps.
I still do drink, but not at the frentic pace I once did.
You have to stay sober to post at one or two in the morning ;)
You are all very brave to post and you have gained one more heart, cheering you on, in your daily fight..
It sounds like a broken record but..
You all rock! :D
It always amazes me (or at least it does since getting sober) that people who are depressed drink to alleviate their depression. When I went through treatment I learned that alcohol IS a depressant! Hello? Isn't that kinda like pouring gasoline on a fire? So it's starts or continues a vicious cycle (or is that cyclone?) ripping through a drinking person's life.
In sobreity, my feelings are up and down and I've learned that that is the normal flow of life and human emotion. It feels SO good to be a part of the human race again - even those days when it feels like a rat race at the end of the day, like right now, I'm tired but know I put in a good hard day of work and feel pretty darned good about all I accomplished.
PS. Richard, don't feel guilty about Thursday's - it's one of my guilty pleasures where I can pop in and have some fun.
yeah, makes sense to this depressed alcoholic! This makes me chuckle...I don't think I ever did anything because it was logical. Drinking was great at first because I could finally relax and laugh and enjoy things. Plus, it did a great job of numbing out all those dark feelings. But this too passed, and it did become fuel for the fire of alcoholic insanity.Quote:
Originally Posted by RedHedd
One of the tough things about getting sober is feeling your feelings again. After stuffing them for so long, it takes a while to get through the garbage. I felt like giving up early on, I was afraid it was going to be too painful to get sober. That's why a support group is really important. :)