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LOL LOL LOL LOL
Amber Lee these stories are just so funny - I tried sitting down with Bagel, Ketchum and Dan and regaling them.
Well Bagel seemed to listen - but fell asleep - typical.
Ketchum looked bewildered, as usual, then ran off upstairs.
Dan had a good wash and really enjoyed the stories - he stayed!!!!!
I'm giving up on those three - I love 'em - keep them coming pedrleaaaaaasssse!:D :D
Lynne
Ahah!!! These bedtimes stories were a SUCCESS!!!Quote:
Originally posted by lynnestankard
...Bagel seemed to listen - but fell asleep ...
Thanks for letting me know.
I am having a ton of fun with these.
I'm having one of those days and could really use an "Auntie Amber" story...;)
*cough, cough* hint, hint *cough, cough*
;) :D ;)
Once Upon A Time
... a long, long, long time ago (so they say) the many members of the Cat-ly Knights of the Pet Talk Round Table had an undersea adventure!
Now keep in mind that undersea adventures are VERY frustrating for felines! It's tricky getting into wet-suits when you have claws and no opposable thumbs, and it's awkward to have water pressing your wet-suit in all around your svelte, trim **ahem, cough, cough** body, AND it's miserable seeing a tasty, toothsome morsel slip by when your paws are in the blamed wet-suit and your head is incased in a bubble. It takes a lot to make cats go cavorting under the seas, you understand. It takes a lot, but our cats are valiant, brave, and daring! So, when the emergency call went out that small, valiant volunteers were needed to save the world, who answered the call? The brave, the furry, the valiant Knights of Pet Talk Round Table!
Background: Eco-terrorists have submerged pellets containing a virulent poison off of the Great Barrier Reef that will dissolve and eventually kill all life in the oceans - thereby killing all life in the world! **Gasp!! How dastardly!! How evil!!** By clever cunning they made the pellets ping-pong ball sized and hid them amid razor-sharp reef to keep humans at bay. For once all the humans were working together as a team, but they were stymied by their large size and (face it) awkward bodies.
Spenser-the-Lion called the KoPTRT together. As distasteful as it would be, they and they alone could save the world from certain death. Who else had the grace, artistry, and daring to wacky little ping-pong balls from impossible locations and out to where the humans could access them? Face it, when you think grace, you think kitty-cats, now don't you? From around the world each cat eagerly appeared and helped one another suit up. Ernie and Butter did spend a great deal of time racing around the beach kicking sand up and tackling one another, but it was pointed out that their energy was needed elsewhere. Casper and Kitty prettily lead the dive team off of the boat once it anchored above the fatal pellets. "Tha-awkie" the first pellet popped from under the reef! Mr. B. bopped it to the next cat in line, Cassy, who relayed it to Scooter, to Sydney, to Marius, to Smokey, to Princess, to Miss Vicki, to Shiloh and on and on it rolled until the human could capture and neutralize it. The same story repeated all over the reef: to the north: Stormy to Oliver to Livvy to Edwina to Ritzy to Snow Tiger to Amy to Tubby and to the East: Rainbow to Foxy to Noah to Kitty to Noel to Casper to Prema to Maya to Boots and to the South: Pesto to Garbo to Trevor to Mimi to Wynki to Simba to Jumper to Emmett to Pepper and to Stump … In fact, in all directions of the compass the many brave-hearted Knights thwackied ping-pong balls of destruction because they were so brave!
One human reported to his commander what he was seeing and was severely reprimanded for drinking while on duty. "There can't be hundreds of little cats in wet suits scampering at the bottom of the sea, you fool," he screamed, "Do you have rapture of the deep that you're seeing things?"
To be continued...
Luv it! Luv It! LUV IT!!!
Can't wait 4 part 2!!!:D
Great story AmberLee... Anxiously awaiting the sequel!
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OMG!!! There's actually an illustration of scuba diving cats?? Yow!! Who'd thought it??? I've been bouncing some ideas off of friends who scuba dive and one of them sketched out Cassy in a suit, but that some one else also thought of this conceit!!! I'm stunned! :eek: :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally posted by LoudLou
Great story AmberLee... Anxiously awaiting the sequel!
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As long as the story was too long for one post, I'm beefing it up and adding even more 'adventure' -- part two should be up tomorrow.
I can't wait to hear the second part, go ahead AmberLee ;)
Go Amber Lee!!! It's like the 'olden' days at the cinema when they had the exciting serial on Saturday!!!! I'm all agog and the three stooges are actually listening- and staying awake!!!:D :D :D
Lynne
AmberLee, what a creative person you are! I love it!! :D
I'm eagerly awaiting part II also!!! :D
Oops :o I've hit a technical delay and won't have Part II up as fast as I'd hoped. My friend/co-worker who the diver giving me tips is getting back from a business trip tomorrow. Apparently my shifting the story to the Great Barrier Reef has caused a couple technical difficulties that she will help me straighten out. Our emails aren't enough to get my mind around the concepts she's telling me about. Hope to get the story fixed and back on track SOON.
She sketched out Cassy in a diver's outfit that is really cute. If I get a chance I'll get it scanned so you all can see her creative talents, too.
Niina, thanks for okaying my proposed plot twist. I think it's going to work great! Hee, hee!
Listen -- Was that the Mighty Wurltizer Organ playing the theme of Saturday Movies Serial that I hear? Hee, hee, hee!
;) :DQuote:
Originally posted by AmberLee
Niina, thanks for okaying my proposed plot twist. I think it's going to work great! Hee, hee!
I'm pleased to announce that Amberlee's bestseller has already been translated in a number of languages. My 3 are bilingual (:rolleyes: ) but I wanted other family members to enjoy them. Now they are anxiously waiting for the sequel. :D
Foxy would like to know if he can appear as himself in the film as soon as he heard that he could play in the water :D
Wahoo!! Sorry I'm hitting delays on the 2nd part. Soon, guys! A couple minor family challenges are getting in the way of PT. :o Gio, Foxy would certainly light up the cinema screen, wouldn't he? Unfortunately, I don't think authors have casting authority. Unless we start a PT Cinema division? Was it Chuck who did the videos on the Texas trip? Is he the official PT director? Perhaps we should lobby him???Quote:
Originally posted by Gio
...Amberlee's bestseller has already been translated in a number of languages. ... Foxy would like to know if he can appear as himself in the film as soon as he heard that he could play in the water
Had to bring this back to the top AmberLee - some of us haven't forgotten we're waiting for Part 2 of our Bedtime Story!!!
PURRRRRLEASE!!!
Lynne
ROFLMAO I just read Zippy Kat's story! OMG i send that to all my rabbit loving friends and showed it to alot of people! I love that story! I will keep that on my bullentin ( cant spell tonight FINALS week!) board and read it whenever i need a smile or laugh! thanks :D
:o :DQuote:
Originally posted by RainbowAndHobbesMom
ROFLMAO I just read Zippy Kat's story! OMG i send that to all my rabbit loving friends and showed it to alot of people! I love that story! I will keep that on my bullentin ( cant spell tonight FINALS week!) board and read it whenever i need a smile or laugh! thanks :D
lol Thanks!!!
and I haven't forgotten that we were promised a part two either...;)
Hey AmberLee - bringing this to the top again!!!
Just that we have a little problem here - I've read and reread these tales to the three stooges and not only am I awaiting part two but just to let you know that Bagel and Ketchum and Dan are waiting too!!! Now I don't mind (much!!) waiting - but you know what cats are like - when they want it - they want it NOW!:D :D
Lynne
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OMG; PCB and I were 'talking' about this thread last night. I'd forgotten how much fun it was. Now what the heck was I planning for part II? :eek: :confused: :D
Requesting permission for using a specific kitten...
Once,there were poor Lost Cats.They were cold,and hungry,and all alone.Then they heard,of theFound Cat Hotel.And they came,and the kindly Geezer,took them,in,cleaned them,fed them.They were so happy,that they became The Found Cats,and now,they have a place,all thier own.They ahve Toys,Fun ,Food,and most importantly Friends,so they will never be alone,ever again.
Once upon a time there was a Prince named Edward.
He took a pee and then climbed into bed.
The End.
:cool:
But did it keep him awake, proving him to be a true prince??? Or is that just a princess thing?Quote:
Originally posted by RICHARD
Once upon a time there was a Prince named Edward.
He took a pee and then climbed into bed.
....
Permission received to proceed. (After a 3 year hiatus, sheesh.)
:o :o :o The new permission was from a different PTer. I was Sheeshing my procrastion and forgetfulness.
My goodness.... you are so creative, your bedtime stories are great!! :)
Smitty shouted back, “Rapture of the deep? Or drunk? Are you CRAZY? No. I know what I saw and I saw cats. Cats helping the rescue operation. Even a few dolphins and other critters helping out, too. Give me a breathalyzer or whatever test you want. ”
Meanwhile, dainty silver tabby Miss Elizabeth Barrett Browning was enjoying the freedom of scooting underwater, as she coordinated rescue operations between teams. She was particularly entranced with riding dolphin-back and exciting the fishes by batting at them.
Suddenly a mangy, rangy big old shark swam up and chomped the pert kitten. What a shock! One second she was swooshing through the water and the next the world went dark and there was pressure, painful pressure on her helmet and on her Kelvar vest. Ugh, hard to breathe. Pant, pant, pant! Her little paws weren’t too effective against the shark’s tough old tongue and palate, but she gamely kicked and kicked. Her tail lashed and slashed. Fortunately, her dolphin stead was even more effective at getting the shark’s attention. POW, he nose-butted the old stinker.
The shark was trying to concentrate on chomping the odd little octopi or whatever it was he had scooped up. He didn’t have time to deal with this nasty dolphin. Maybe he should just swallow the wriggly morsel whole? Finally he decided it wasn’t worth it and spat Miss Lizzy out. “What is WRONG with you? Quit thumping my tummy or I’ll bite you!” he roared through his pain.
“You almost swallowed Miss Lizzy” the dolphin hollered back. “We’ve signed a peace treaty for their help and you almost blew it!”
“Treaty?” the shark blustered embarrassly. He vaguely recalled hearing something about it and eco-terrorists and – cats, whatever they were. Probably some nuisancy new type of fish, no doubt.
The dolphin was pushing Miss Lizzy with his snout. “Are you alright, little one?”
She thankfully inflated her lungs, enjoying the sensation of breathing freely again. “I’m fine now, thank you for your help! Let’s get the message to Spenser’s team.”
Our plucky heroine hopped atop the dolphin once again and was very proud at the successful thwarting of the dastardly plot. Once again, the Knights and Ladies of the Animal Chatter Round Table had made the world a better place – for cats, for humans, for all creatures.
Rest well, you sweet fur-baby, and know that you are safe from forgetful sharks and from eco-terrorists, too. Blessings on the K (aL)oACRT!!!
*****
P.S. I chose not to go back and correct the inaccuracies of scuba diving off the Great Barrier Reef, mainly because the expert that objected previously has moved away, and I've forgotten what she said would be needed to correct it. Sorry, all you scuba experts!
Phew! Could Cassy and Livvy sleep after all that excitement? :eek:
And a Scraed Cold Hungry Kitten looked inside and wished that she could be a Found Cat too.
And be warm,and have plenty to eat,and never be lonely.
Then the Pet Talker Angels answered her prayers and shes a Happy Scrappy 2.
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Once upon a time a long, long time ago, the adventurous furry princess sat by the castle door and when one of the clumsy couriers stepped outside to get the royal mail, she darted out the door to get a bit of freshest of fresh air. She hopped over a puddle and wriggled happily on a dry patch of concrete that had been kissed by the sun. Then she scampered through a big puddle, splishy splashy, splishy splashy – what fun! And strolled under a camellia shrub. Um, doesn’t that smell nice? She nibbled daintily on a bit of groundcover and sashayed behind the bushes to the large bush under her bedroom window. Hmmm, doesn’t THIS smell interesting? The barefoot courier was hopping from foot to foot imploring the dainty majestic wonder to come inside where is was dry. Nope, no sirree bob. It smelled so fresh and invigorating she couldn’t understand why the whole court didn’t refresh themselves under damp bushes. She felt like she could breathe deeply for the first time in weeks. Large grabby hands kept reaching for her, which was indeed a nuiscence, but her lithe nimble body was well able to elude such clumsy attempts. Her precious ears rotated to monitor her grabby partner’s lunges, she explored the undersides of some of the vehicles lining the royal parking area.
“Don’t rub up against anything greasy, leaky, or smelly, your darlingness, or you’ll have to get a bath and you’ll HATE that!”, she was warned. It made good sense, so she quickly scampered back under bush to yelp insults at her royal fuzzy brother. He was having a fit in the window as he watched her cavort. What fun!!!
The royal courier was getting very damp in the drizzle that her royal fuzziness was sheltered from by the bush. Finally the noisy, soggy, complaining grabby courier went back inside the castle. Whew. Now the princess could think! Now she could stretch. Now she could decide what SHE wanted to do for once. So she pondered and pondered for almost a minute. She realized precisely what she longed for, and it was do-able. She marched to the door of the castle and DEMANDED to be let in so she could grab a snack. The naughty courier opened the door and let the royal miss inside. And the courier was relived to have the adventuress home. And her brother was glad she wasn’t in the bush any more. And she was glad to be warm and fed so everybody in the story was happy. Isn’t that nice?
Since everyone is happy, why don’t you relax and get some restful sleep, too, my precious one? :D :D :D
“Willikins, Matthews, and Pouncer, Attorneys At Law”
The sleek, suave and debonair attorney paced in front of his fellow partners, practicing his closing remarks. Juries can be so prejudiced, even in this day and age, that perfect presentation is very important.
“Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my client, stands before you today unjustly accused. My honored opponent insists that Oliver’s fur is in the colander. Of COURSE it’s his fur in the colander. He sleeps in the colander every chance he gets. It comforts him. Photos of him sleeping in the colander have been posted on the internet and in calendars in previous years. Now, you may or may not have ever slept in a colander, but I ask you to search your hearts and your beds. I am sure you will find your fur or your hair as the case may be wherever you sleep. My honored opponent may never have slept in a colander, but how can he say that fur in a colander proves that my client ate the pasta? If anything, it proves his innocence. His pet human admitted on this very witness stand to washing the colander before making the pasta salad and confirms that this would have washed away his fur. Examine the photo before you. The colander is metal. When you pour steaming pasta into a metal colander, the colander gets hot. Would you sleep in a metal bed heated to water’s boiling point? I think not, and neither would this cat. So the colander had time to cool down and become a comfortable heat. A warm, soothing nook to escape the pressures of the day. And while Oliver was peacefully asleep in the colander, someone ate the pasta salad! His fur confirms his presence in the kitchen sink, in the colander. But who ate the salad? Ladies and gentlemen, be fair. Can a anyone, much less a cat sleeping in a kitchen be two places at once? Can he be atop a picnic table at a beach a mile away chomping pasta? We know that he can’t. Does this trial demand we prove who chomped the pasta? Recall what the judge said earlier. It does not. We don’t care if his humans ate the salad and are trying to pretend they didn’t. We don’t care if the family dogs helped themselves as their humans frolicked in the waves. We don’t care if passers-by on the beach helped themselves when no one was looking. We don’t even care if a mighty herd of rambunctious punk mice or even monkeys scampered up atop the picnic table and devoured the lot. Even if the very thought of mice or monkeys makes our mouths water, we don’t care. My client is proven innocent by the District Attorney’s own tests and evidence. Let Oliver return to his loving home, the home with humans who even now agree that he is a much wronged fur-baby and beg for his return from captivity. Free Oliver for justice’s sake! But free Oliver.”
Pouncer’s tail slashed as he concluded his heartfelt plea. His partners, Willikins and Matthews applauded vigorously before they came up with helpful tips to improve the stirring and impassioned closing argument. The mouth-watering reference to mice was debated vigorously. Might it be just too distracting with it’s delicious implications?
Most satisfying of all was the realization that Oliver, innocence feline-afied, would be sleeping peacefully in his colander by the end of trial, perhaps as early as tomorrow.
Sleep well, my furry delight, whether you are in a colander or not.
Oh Pouncer, you are so eloquent!! *sniff* Oliver will be so grateful!
:D :D :D
:D
Thanks! ;-)
Ahhhhhh! Noooooooooooo!!! http://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gifhttp://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gifhttp://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gifYou remember the collander??? I can hardly type, blew my coffee up my nose! You are a hoot, Amber! Oliver, come read!!!
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And how about the DRYER?????????? WHERE HE ACTUALLY TOOK A SPIN FOR SEVERAL SECONDS! :eek: Fur in the pasta, now fur in the underwear......I sense another law suit looming! http://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gifhttp://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gifhttp://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/biggrin.gif
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Now this is the old pet talk how have we changed so much. This and the Klam Jusse were just great things. Thanks for reviving this thread ladies.
You're right Corinna!!!:) Brings back fond memories of simpler times...Remember when we were all scrambling to learn how to post one picture?:D And no digital cameras! lol What hasn't changed is my kitchen sadly, which could use an overhaul!:D
What a great story! Love the pics too. Nothing better than a good story book with great pictures. :D
:eek: Is that really Oliver?? What - THE Oliver? Livvy's Knight in Furry Armour. I've never seen him before. He is adorably cuddly-looking. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by tatsxxx11
Thanks KK!:) Yup, THE Oliver, the one and only!:D Oh, I'm a proud Mom for sure but he IS the sweetest, most squishable, lovable, gentlest of souls! Loves EVERYONE, EVERY THING, skinned, furry, feathered...follows the dogs everywhere, trys to follow them out the door to play (:eek:) sleeps curled up in Star's belly, even snuggles with the guinea pigs, washing them! lol At the vet's, he proudly marches out of his port-a-prison, jumps up onto the examing table and plops right down on the table scale and starts purrring:D Everyone loves Ollie! He really is a doll baby!:)