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That is true... i was only stating statistics prove that teaching abstinence is more effective than teaching safe sex in preventing pregnancies and diseases.Quote:
Originally posted by dukedogsmom
Meant to note that I'm speaking from experience, not statistics. I was raised in a Christian home and taught values, etc. Just because you teach it, you can't make them not have sex.
in my own opinion..
i would not want my (TEENAGE) kid going to school.... and being taught it was o.k. for them to have sex whenever they want where ever they want and with who ever they want as long as it was protected... when I would be teaching them different.
I really would enjoy how they would NOT tell them how they ARE worth the wait... and that if they waited it would be the most special experience in their life...
I would not want the child who i love more than anything giving something so special away to some silly boy who really doesn't love them ... can't or won't support their baby.. (and why should I ) and will leave them at the drop of a hat for the next little girl who walks by...
It would not be worth it to see them go through that pain... not to mention if the sorry boy or girl gave them some disease.. (and we all know condoms don't prevent anything 100%) ,,,,,......that they would have to live with for their life... and when they one day matured and found the one they really love and would like to marry.. would have to find a way to tell them of their embarrasing situation and possibly lose that person. :(
I would MUCH rather teach the children out there absitnence.
My husband and I were just talking about this. I don't think that either of us understood the importance of abstinence until we fell in love. That is when I finally wished that I'd saved my body for my soulmate instead of giving it away to a young jerk boyfriend.
I will try my hardest to make my children understand how special sex is. It is so much more then a physical act. It makes babies and it is something special to be shared with your spouse.
I hope to God that I can make them understand, but if my children are as stubborn as I was, they won't. I will also be open to give them birthcontrol to be safe.
My little sister is 18 and still a virgin. My parents preach abstinence but they also put her on the pill when she was 16 with her first serious boyfriend. My sister has enough self respect and understanding that being on BC doesn't mean it's ok to have sex.
Ideally, it'll work out like that with my kids.
*edit* Unfortunatly, I may be wrong about my sister. I was just reminded of a little incident this summer. Hopefully I am wrong and she is indeed still a virgin.
p.s. I am ok with schools teaching about sex. I am ok with it because there are so many parents who are not doing their job. I know that my child will be informed, but I'd hate to see another child ruin their life because they didn't know any better.
My mother's parents never ever talked to her about sex or her body. When she had her first period in gym class, she screamed bloody murder. She thought she was dying, she had no idea what it was. Her highschool boyfriend was much older then her and my grandfather forced her to date him because "he was a good guy". At one point, my grandfather even let him live with them. The BF told my mom that she wouldn't get pregnant if she jumped up and down after sex.
My mom has had multiple abortions, the first at 15 years old. Each time, they had to drive her to California (abortions weren't legal and/or on every street corner in New Mexico back then). All the way there, the family would taunt her, calling her a whore.
Anyways, I'm getting off subject. My point is that there are some really crappy parents out there and SOMEONE needs to educate these kids.
after reading Tonya's post I would like to add..
I don't mind sex education... about the body, birds and the bees, and the consiquences of having sex..
but don't tell my kid that it is o.k. to have sex.. and you should use a condom to be safe...
:eek: :eek:
So this girl was 12 when she had her first baby, and then got pregnant again so soon?? What the hell???
Methinks mommy should have gotten her some birth control after the first one. I suppose there will be another in a year or two??
She won't even be my age when her kid is getting her driver's license.
wow.
Exactly. I don't know what approach they take these days, but when I was a kid, it was fairly innocent sex education. They preached abstinence, but the least you can do is use protection if you're going to.Quote:
Originally posted by Sara luvs her Tinky
after reading Tonya's post I would like to add..
I don't mind sex education... about the body, birds and the bees, and the consiquences of having sex..
but don't tell my kid that it is o.k. to have sex.. and you should use a condom to be safe...
Foxgal, my goddaughter is 15 and a bit slow too. She tested just 1 point above mentally retarded way back in elementary school.My Aunt decided that her daughter "wasn't that way" and shoved her into regular school and refused to allow her to have and IEP for teachers to make accomodations for her. Long story short, the girl is now a teenager, and instad of being in a safe school for other kids like her, she is in a school filled with kids one step from jail. We KNOW she's fooling around with the boys. We are quite frankly surprised she's not already pregnant because she is obsessed with babies. I agree with you: if she was to become pregnant, it would be mostly mom's fault, not her's. She has never been taught the hows and whys - she just knows it feels good and it is what people do. Thats IT. NOTHING else about sex - the consequences ending in pregnancy or disease. Not the emotional consequences either.
Now, with my step kids... I met them when the oldest was 14, the youngest was 10. I was simply stunned at the knowledge they all had about sex. It made me VERY uncomfortable that a 10 year old didn't have complete innocence regarding sex or male anatomy. BUT years later, I see that 10 year old is now 15 and dating a sweet boy. We know that if he ever tried to push her into sex that she'd slug him one in the gut. We've discussed it, and she realizes she wants more in life than pregnant in highschool or college (which is how hubby dearest didn't graduate - his son came into being) I know when she is lying (she is a BAAAAD liar) and I know she is serious about remaining a virgin til at least college.
Same with my now 18 year old son and his girlfriend. They've been dating for over two years now and he gets a lot of jokes from his friends but they have both decided that their sports and education are far too important to gamble away for sex. Hubby apparently knew what he was doing all those years ago to teach them about sex - the whys and hows - and that "yes its fun and wonderful, but not SO fun and wonderful to risk your life and dreams for it." Hubby has taught them that sex is like Russian Roullette -- its powerful and a big rush, but one of these times you'll get the bullet. My kids know all too well that the bullet is in the chamber and don't want to risk getting it and putting their dreams on hold to raise a child.
Teaching abstinance does not appear to work , I recently saw a Documentary on Texas, the bible belt they called it, where they preach to their young ones all the time just that, they nearly all attend church etc etc, to cut a long story short, they have one of the highest records of teenage pregnancy's and STD'S, so for me that proves it does not work.
It is sad to see a child bringing up a child, that girl is the same age as my daughter, I just cannot imagine it, it's beyond me!!
:(
Hmmm I'm going to have to think about this post. I want to get my point across without forming assumtions...but I think that will be hard.
I just want to say that I have absolutely no intention of ever having sex until I am happily married.
But I am NOT saying that my mom has taken the best approach, not even a good, approach of teaching me about sex & body. When I read some of these threads and hear the adults talk, oh how I wish some of you were my mom. I wish her way of thinking was the same as alot of you people.
Isn't that the truth! :mad:Quote:
Originally posted by catnapper
Yup, sad but true. Hubby teaches 7th & 8th grade. He sees it every year when a 12 year old is pregnant. Though what gets me is if she got pregnant so young, then wouldn't you think she'd practice extra safe sex afterwards? nooooooooo... just like hubby's school they have one then another. Soon they are baby making machines with 3 or 4 babies before they graduate IF they graduate. And then welfare pays for it all! :mad:
Funny how that works, you know? People who can't afford it, pop kids out and live off of welfare, while other people are building their careers and lives to be able to support families. Those are the families that need to have kids to balance out all of the screwups that result from TPT reproducing...
It's just sad how this world is going to hell these days. All of these "teen" parents is getting way out of hand. It's absolutely rediculous! They are all humping like rabbits so young these days and it's just so sad. I'm glad I was raised properly with good moral values and enjoyed a childhood. Like I mentioned in another thread, I'm 28 years old and still think I'm too young to have children. I'm busy building a career and financial stability before I choose to have kids.
I see the human race as our own destruction...if things keep going like this, where will we be? Look at the role model for these kids? Their parents are just kids themselves with no reasoning of responsibility, let alone financial support. It's disgusting, but media promotes it, IMO. Everyone is having sex with everyone else on TV, and it's pretty typical in high school, it seems, especially in these TV serials and it's OK because the media says it's ok. I can't even imagine sleeping around with so many people...just giving yourself to someone you don't deeply love. It's sad that something that's supposed to be special and intimate is made so animalistic these days...:mad: :( :( Yuk :(
Just out of curiosity have you ever had to live on welfare? people seem to assume it is a piece of cake to pop out a baby and then live on welfare,until you have walked in those shoes, I expect it is not that easy ya know.
You can only get welfare to pay for it if you only have a baby every 2 years. If you have a baby(welfare pays) but if you have a baby next year(welfare won't pay).
teens having babies doesnt happen as often as it used to... so be happy that ppl are thinking before acting....
in Canada anyways....
She shut her xanga account down for some reason:confused: