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Sorry about your Bootsy. Don't have cats but always had dogs and it never gets easier. I often say I won't own another dog but always change my mind after the shock wears off. Not too keen on people who think I'm nuts for crying over a lost pet, to us, they are family.
I am so sorry to hear about Bootsy. I really echo Medusa's comments. Our mind plays horrific tricks on us at this time, and it is only with time that your mind will sort it all out, and hopefully your heart will follow. The most loving decision is often the hardest decision. RIP, Bootsy.
Rest in peace.
My prays are with you.
sorry for your loss
had to put down our beloved 17 year old kitty Billy, in June, also from kidney failure. He had Chronic Renal Failure, which he had been struggling with for years.
Reading your post, I know exactly how you feel. We have 3 other kitties, and I have had cats in my life since I was 7, (am 47 now), and I loved them all very, very much, but Billy was so very special to me. This cat and I had a real connection...always did, right from the beginning. I swear we could read each others minds. Billy was a treasured member of our family, and we all loved him so much. It's been almost 6 months since he died, and I still miss him every day. I don't think I could I could miss him more if he were human, and I will miss him for the rest of my life.
My prayers are with you...Hang in there!