Prevent the torture of my son ;)

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Originally Posted by joycenalex

he knows how to get jobs, he needs to learn how to keep them. he's 21, not a legally dependant child, and some adversity early in life will strengthen his spine. good luck with your hubby, you can show him this, it might help to see that his softness is no kindness in the longer run of your sons life

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Don't I know it...
I wasn't nearly as bad as your son, but I had a lot of things handed to me, esp. when I was with my ex. He paid all my bills & took care of everything.

Then one day I was dumped in a strange city alone. No folks to run to, not a single friend to lend me a hand. It was a horrible exp. to go through. I went through all kinds of emotions, ups & downs, rich, then poorer then dirt. I survived it all cause my dad taught me to always work hard, even when you don't need the money. So when I was dumped I had a full time job that was secure.

I had the chance to be a stay at home wife, as my ex made so much money, but I kept working. I don't even want to think where I'd be without the job I have today.

My dad taught me well, never be lazy, be smart, & work hard. I'm only 24, just a few yrs older then your son.

What would your son do if he was suddenly alone in the world? he wouldn't have much of a fun start thats for sure. Your hubby needs to prepare him for the real world, which isn't always friendly

Maybe you should not be paying for his tuition, but let him rack up some student loans. Some people are more "receptive" to education when they are paying for the entire shot...

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Originally Posted by catnapper

his "talk" will amount to "don't do it again". Everyone thinks hubby is a big blow-hard, know-it-all, push-'em-around kind of guy. He's the biggest push-over there is! He knows it too and complains that he just can't say no to the kids.... which leave ME being the bad guy who ends up saying no and making me evil in the kids' eyes.

Its gonna be a loooooong summer. :rolleyes: Anyone have extra room for me and 5 cats? ;) :p

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My husband is EXACTLY the same way, and I, too, am the "mean one", all the time!

I know EXACTLY how that is, and I have no more answers than you do.

:eek: My parents practically begged me NOT to move out because they wanted me to save my money. I'm so so grateful that my brother and I had great relationships with our parents. We both contributed to rent/bills but they wanted us to take care of ourselves, work hard and have good careers. If they needed money, they'd ask, but this never ever made us spoiled brats or lose respect. We had an open, honest relationship. We knew how hard our parents worked to give us so much..not always material stuff.

I'm a grown woman with a lot on my plate, and I miss my folks so much for emotional support and wisdom. I can handle almost everything but I still feel empty and alone without the "nudge"

I guess everyone's situation is different. No offense to anyone, but witnessing my friends and family, I think males have a tendency to be less driven at a certain age. But that's my opinion. My only problem now is that my brother has OCD which only affects what he does in my house. Anyway, it's a tough age and he may suddenly "wake up".

I know you have so much on your plate that it's overflowing, I'll keep you in my prayers for a little relief. Hugs

Catnapper....

Put a For Sale sign in front of your house, and don't tell him.

When he notices, just say, "Oh, deal closes in a month. Didn't I tell you, dear? Your dad and I need a smaller place." :D

You originally asked for a game....lol.

Or MOVE and DON'T TELL HIM!