I am starting to really hate men!

Dating in your 30's sucks. It think the joke is true: How are men like parking spaces? All the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped! LOL

I have tried the online dating thing. Matchmaker.com is full of men just trying to get lucky.

I am now trying a christian site. Met a guy and we dated for about 4 weeks. All of a sudden, he disapears into the wild blue yonder. And we really seemed to hit it off. I don't get it.

The only reason that I tried the online dating thing is because I am a single mom and my day consists of working and going home to fight fires there. LOL So I am at work, home or church basically.

I think I give up! LOL

Sorry guys, just needed to vent! :D

~ Aki

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Originally posted by aki


I think I give up! LOL



~ Aki

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When you look for trouble, you'll find it.
It's better to sit back and let trouble find you!


;)

Ha!!! I gave up dating 10 years ago and have vowed to remain single until the day I die. I love my single life and wouldn't change a thing. Besides, have you ever gone on to Lavalife and searched for someone between 55 and 65 who's a non-smoker with no kids?? I'd have a better chance at winning the lotto.

Enjoy the life you have and spend as much time as you can with your children. They grow up way too fast.

One big thing for me is I don't want any more kids. I have a 15 y/o already.

Seems like a lot of men in their 30's are just starting to want a family.

I truly love the single life, but one day my dear daughter will go away to college and have her own life. i guess I just don't want to be alone.
:)

~ Aki

The older you get, the harder it gets, too. I'll soon be 41 and have given up. Most of the time it doesn't bother me. It's much easier and safer on your heart to just stay away.

Oh and LOL Richard. Trouble seems to find me whether I look for it or not!

:D

I've dated everywhere between 2 years younger than me to my current boyfriend whos just turned 50. aaand guess what? they *all* suck, the only difference in them is that the older ones know how to hide their immaturity better until youve moved in together, gotten engaged, etc...

my current bf knows if we ever break up its the end for me. I have no interest in any more relationships.

Aki,

After years of being dumped by guys, I've finally given up. My saying is, "The more I know men, the more I love my cats."

I tried the "singles ads". I have a real problem looking for a guy on the internet. I suggest you read the book "Likes Music, Loves to Dance" by Mary Higgins Clark. It'll give you a new outlook on singles ads.

At the age of 52, I'm finally content with the way my life is. If by chance I meet someone, fine. If not, I'm not gonna lose sleep over it.

The only man in my life right now has 4 legs, a tail and no fur!! He's there for me everyday, loves me unconditionally and only asks that I take care of him. Works for me!!

The lesson you're learning is one I wish I would've learned a long time ago. Now I'm stuck in a relationship I hate and I'm miserable. I would give just about anything to have what some of these ladies have... Freedom. :(

Dick and I have been together almost 23 years and I love him to death, but I've told him that if something happens to him - I'm NOT doing this again. I'll just live with my doggies. They are a lot less work and give a lot more back - higher rate of return.
:)

I agree with Richard. :eek:

You're trying too hard. Put your trust in God and let him take care of putting you at the right place at the right time. Forget dating and just meet guys, become friends and take it from there. When you know someone on a friendly level first, you get to know the real side of them instead of the "game" put on in a dating relationship where you're both trying to impress each other. Friends are more open, honest, and comfortable with each other. If you can be friends with a guy first, you can make it more later. If you're daughter is anything like I was at her age, no man will be good enough for you and it probably stresses her to see different men coming and going from your life. I had to deal with it with both of my parents.
Slick is right, spend time with your daughter now, because she will be gone later. My mom gave up on the dating thing a while back and focused more on me and we have a great relationship because of it. So now when I do move out, I'll still be around because she was there for me instead of trying to find a man for herself.

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Originally posted by Pit Chick

You're trying too hard. Put your trust in God and let him take care of putting you at the right place at the right time. Forget dating and just meet guys, become friends and take it from there. When you know someone on a friendly level first, you get to know the real side of them instead of the "game" put on in a dating relationship where you're both trying to impress each other. Friends are more open, honest, and comfortable with each other. If you can be friends with a guy first, you can make it more later. If you're daughter is anything like I was at her age, no man will be good enough for you and it probably stresses her to see different men coming and going from your life. I had to deal with it with both of my parents.

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That is some wonderful advice. I agree with everything you said 100% and you put it very well. For me, the only way to have a good, solid relationship is to start as friends and let it naturally develop.

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Originally posted by aly
That is some wonderful advice. I agree with everything you said 100% and you put it very well. For me, the only way to have a good, solid relationship is to start as friends and let it naturally develop.

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Ditto to this and to Pit Chick. I was also in my 30's before I met Terry. I had given up on looking and decided I needed to live my own life the way I wanted to. I like motorcycles, so instead of sitting at home listening to them go by on the street and moping about how I didn't have a guy to ride behind, I went out and got my motorcycle license and my own bike! I found some single friends who also had motorcycles and we had a ball going all over the country with our bikes. One morning we were on a breakfast run and there's was a "new" guy sitting at the end of the table. Saw him a few more times and eventually started dating him - casually though. Usually with the motorcycles and/or friends were involved. It eventually grew to me moving in and we've now been together for 10 years.

So, my advice is to quit trying. Live your life and do the things you enjoy and eventually it will happen - and it will be better than if you tried to force it. Also, when your daughter goes away to college that will free up a whole lot of time for you and you can start pursuing interests that you have let go by the wayside since you don't have much time. It's entirely possible that at that time you will find it easier to find and maintain a relationship.

I say forget about men. Don't hate them, just forget about them and let them find you. The right one will show up when you're least expecting it. :)

Thanks for all the advise guys! :)

Yeah the man in my house is a fuzz-butt too! LOL

Oh and thanks for letting me rant. I needed that~

I'm only in my early 30's but I DO know what you mean. Before I met my husband, I swore I'd never meet a man who was right for me. People always said my standards were too high. (EXCUSE me for knowing what would make me happy! And I DID find a man who met ALL those standards) I met hubby online. He has everyting emotionally I was looking for, but nothing physically, but he's absolutely perfect for me.

What online dating taught me was this: Don't discount somebody because he's "not my type". If I met hubby on the street, I would have kept walking by and missed the best thing that ever happend to me. I'm telling you, he's far from the image of the man I'd figure I'd spend my life with... big Santa Claus Belly, crooked teeth (I have a thing about perfect teeth :rolleyes: ), etc. But since I knew him first through his emails to me, I got to know his heart first and gave him a chance. Best chance I ever gave somebody!

Now, I'm not saying everyone has the same success from online dating as I did... I know its VERY scary with the weirdoes out there. I was VERY lucky to have met him almost right away (he was the third guy I met from online) But you can apply the lesson in life. You might not have ever noticed the shy guy in the cubicle on the second floor of your office, but maybe if you open your eyes a little differently you can see something in somebody you'd never have looked at before. And sometimes stepping out of your normal box is what it takes to find the right guy with the right fit for you.

I think Catnapper has a great point - but it shouldn't only be with men.

I've met people on this board that I might not have been able to chat with in person since I tend to be fairly shy in social situations. I've met some nice people here and am learning to see behind the mask we all put forth to see the real person underneath.

After my first marriage ended I spent Ten years alone, I am social Phobic so going out for me was hardly and option, I tried a couple of times but just did not seem to fit in, so I gave up, everyone said to me you will never meet anyone if you don't go out, I proved them all wrong, I met my current husband two door's down, where my son was playing with his nephew, we have been together 14 years this August, so don't give up hope and just let them come to you.

Just thought I would let you know in NZ there is now a shortage of men, especially in the 25 to 35 age group, especially in my City, there are like two thousand more females, they say even the ugly guys get to pick up girls in the bars these days lol, looks like all our males are heading overseas, and older women are meeting younger guys under the 25 year group because they are the ones who socialise and go to the nightclubs and bars, my son was dating a 26 year old recently, he is 23, so this is an interesting fact, hope it improves for when my daughter grows up and is looking for Mr Right.:)

LOLOL,

When you go hunting for love, you chase your "quarry"
and when it's time to do the "bow and arrow thing"
you end up with a winded, tired and scared man.

------------------------------------------------

I 'stalked' my GF for a while. I'd see her everyday as I rode my bike into work....the Lycra bike pants helped too!

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/...2/fb9c5421.jpg

my GF told me that I was the last man she would have a relationship with....sadly, it turned out to be true.

The hazards of loving, and losing that love, take a while to get over.

All my GF's are best friends. Replacing the love of your life isn't easy.

----------------------------------------------------

Aki and Moosmom,
Sounds like the men in your lives are "pussies".

;)

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All my GF's are best friends

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Oh to be a fly on THAT wall!!! "RICHARD what???" Being of the female species, I can guarantee that there have been some VERY INTERESTING conversations!!!

That alone would scare me!! ;)

Debbie,

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I say forget about men. Don't hate them, just forget about them and let them find you. The right one will show up when you're least expecting it.

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Great advice!!!

Now, as for Mr. Right. Well, I've given up on Mr. Right. I'm now waiting for "Mr. Filthy Stinking Rich" :p:p

Aki and Moosmom,
Sounds like the men in your lives are "pussies".


ROTFLMAOPMP!

Richard, you always put a smile on my face!

~ AKI

I like men. Most of my best friends in school were guys. I think that in some ways they are easier to have as friends than women, because there's no competition about who is prettier, thinner, wears better clothes, dates cuter guys, etc.

I *know* I am fortunate, in that I met and married my sweetheart a long time ago, we met while I was in college. I still love him, and am glad he loves me!

I never went through the "dating scene" that others have. But I do maintain that there are good men out there, just as there are good women out there. I am friends with some of each. NO ONE likes to feel like prey. Being happy with yourself in your own right is more attractive to people than being a needy person just looking for the next "good catch!" And those looking for that "perfect someone" are the unhappiest ones I know, because human beings are all flawed by nature.

I maintain that there is no need to hate men. Or women, either - I like both genders humanity offers!

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Originally posted by aki
Aki and Moosmom,
Sounds like the men in your lives are "pussies".


ROTFLMAOPMP!

Richard, you always put a smile on my face!

~ AKI

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You only like us when me make you laugh???

Hang in there kiddo.....patience, that the word!

Quote:

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Originally posted by moosmom
Oh to be a fly on THAT wall!!! "RICHARD what???" Being of the female species, I can guarantee that there have been some VERY INTERESTING conversations!!!

That alone would scare me!! ;)

Debbie,



Great advice!!!

Now, as for Mr. Right. Well, I've given up on Mr. Right. I'm now waiting for "Mr. Filthy Stinking Rich" :p:p

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How about me, Donna? I'm not exactly filthy rich! But. . .

I agree with AKI 110%!!!!!!!!!! The "dating pool" out there is getting uglier by the minute. I too have tried the "Online dating". The "Set-up" from a friend. Going to bars. Flirting endlessly with any guy at the grocery store or any waiting line. I have even volunteered at local festivals or events to "meet" someone. I have stopped short at the church/employment arena. I figure the men at church I like are the ones there praying for forgiveness on what they did the night before. (I know because I've sent them there ) The employment route isn't good as then you have the "Sexual harassment" line to negotiate for the rest of your employment/career.:rolleyes:
I too have given up completely on the whole "dating" thing but not without a signifcant fight or scars to prove it. I gave myself 6 months to concentrate on finding someone. I mean completely open to EVERY option. I didn't hold back or brush everything to the side immediately. I agreed to dates from every source friends, internet, or brief meeting. Something, I promise you I would have never done in a million years. I announced to ALL my married friends what my intentions where. That if in this 6 months I did not find someone that I would dedicate myself to being single and they are NEVER to say anything about it to me again!!!
Well in that 6 months, I lost about everything. I lost 2 of my dogs, a good friend (died), my health, and my job/career. Those were just the highlights amongst everything else. Now I am still single, unemployed, and going broke fast.
I've turned into someone I wouldn't date myself!!! The 6 months are about up now. I think my friends have finally "seen the light" and will get off my case for awhile. Now, they have my "Jobless" situation to worry about. I find it completely ironic that I had to lose almost everything else in my life before anyone ever got over the fact I was just missing one thing and that was a man! My advice to anyone and everyone: Be happy with what you have, and don't let what you don't have make you miserable!:cool:

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Originally posted by Scooby4
I figure the men at church I like are the ones there praying for forgiveness on what they did the night before. (I know because I've sent them there )

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I guess church beats the hospital.....:confused:

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Love isn't a two hour movie on the Lifetime channel.

It's 30 years of Star Wars.....

Is that a light saber in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

They're pretty much the same anywhere. I've found that the best thing is just to stay away from them.

Ha Scooby! You are like my cyber twin! LOL

The only thing I can think of that for some reason, men are intimidated by intelligent, attractive women! I have three girl friends the same age. All cute, all make good money, all are very responsible and here we sit.

Thanks AKI!!! I feel your "pain". Ironically, I met someone this week. After all of my attempts and travels... this guy lives 1 1/2 streets over from me!!! However, it wasn't until I was out walking my dogs that I met him. I saw him with his father working in the garden. We just stopped and stared at eachother! A few days later, he stopped me and we chatted. Had our first "Date" last night. It went well but he hasn't called me yet today. Which is typical with the male species.
A few months ago, this guy would have had no chance with me. He is about 40, lives with his parents, and is unemployed. He also smokes alot and drinks some. I am more educated than him, had a very successful career, and own 2 homes. I do not drink or smoke. He does live with his parents because his mother is extremely ill. He takes care of both parents since his siblings don't want the responsibility.
I am starting to realize, that it isn't always the men's fault that we "hate" them. It may be that us successful smart beautiful women have to start looking for other attributes in men. I think us women need to accept that we now have the attributes OURSELVES that we were once looking for in the men we dated. It is going to be much harder for a man to impress us. We may feel we have to "lower our standards" but maybe we just have to change what the standards are. Men are catching on to this slowly and do appreciate that they don't have the "drive" the new modern woman has today.
Us smart and beautiful woman may just have to let our hair down but carry a big purse loaded with money, makeup, adult toys, and various weaponery!!!

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Originally posted by Scooby4
Us smart and beautiful woman may just have to let our hair down but carry a big purse loaded with money, makeup, adult toys, and various weaponery!!!

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Be careful taking those "toys" through metal detectors, especially when THEY are "loaded". ;) :o :eek:

QUIT TRYING!!!!
WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, SOMEONE GREAT WILL COME ALONG. ANY MARK MY WORD.... YOU WILL LOOK YOUR WORST AND FEEL LIKE CRAP WHEN YOU DO.:D

My sister gave me the best advice when I was whining to her (married to a great guy) about the single life at 40....You just trade in one set of problems for another!
Ktn:p

haha!

How does that go? No matter how hot he is, some woman is tired of putting up with his s**t! LOL

:D

Attention to anyone hating men. I can't speak for any other man, but I, myself am not that way to a lady. I have respect for any lady, I must be the last man on earth that would hold a door open for a lady. I would NEVER treat Donna (moosmom) that way. I think you are putting all men because of a few boobs.

Unfortunately, the nice guys are the minority. There are way too many creeps out there.

I too have had my fair share of jerks in my life, but I still donot hate men, it is a shame that these men leave women with such a bad taste in their mouths, val and other's don't give up completely , there are still a few good ones around ya know, and none of them are perfect, but then neither are we? :)

last I checked I was perfect....LOL...
Claudia

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Originally posted by kitten645
last I checked I was perfect....LOL...
Claudia

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:D :D :D Yeah...you go girl!!!!!
I really can't say that I hate men, I just refuse to date or get involved with a man one-on-one. I've been hurt and disappointed one too many times and I won't let that happen again.

...and that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Single women of the world unite and be proud!!!!:D :D

Me too, slick.

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Originally posted by Scooby4

A few months ago, this guy would have had no chance with me. He is about don't have the "drive" the new modern woman has today.

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Speaking of drive....

Men are standard transmissions put it in gear and stomp the gas..
Women? Manual trannys.....You have to match the gear with the speed, downshift, upshift, push in the clutch and freak out when you have to stop on a hill........

Quote:

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Originally posted by Scooby4

Us smart and beautiful woman may just have to let our hair down but carry a big purse loaded with money, makeup, adult toys, and various weaponery!!!

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You forgot the credit cards extra batteries and that cell phone.

:confused:

Men are standard transmissions put it in gear and stomp the gas..
Women? Manula trannys.....You have to match the gear with the speed, downshift, upshift, push in the clutch and freak out when you have to stop on a hill........

wha? dinna ken..blonde I know..