I'm sorry, I wrote this in a personal e-mail and just can not bare to type it again. I feel so horrible, I feel sick.
Uggh Karen, I just can't take it anymore. Yesterday- my dad, my mom, and myself were leaving to go eat dinner. As we walked out this man from across the street came running to us asking if we knew who's cat it was that was laying next to a truck gasping for air. The man said she was hit by a black SUV just seconds before we walked out. She (Samantha) was my neighbors cat. My dad ran to get Michael (my next door neighbor). he ran out of his house and basically screamed "Oh Samantha!' and then his wife came running out after him. Michael grabbed Samantha in his arms and feel to his knees crying. I have never before seen a man cry over his cat. Also, Michaels sheltie, Ivy had gotten out of the door a few months back while they were trying to leave and got hit, she didn't make it either.
Today. My dad decided he was going to bug bomb the house. He put the cats and the ferrets in a back room and taped it off. My mom put the fan on and cracked the windows. Barkley was outside in the back and Sadie went with me over to my grandmas. I SO didn't want to leave the ferrets at the house. I had this gut feeling that something bad was going to happen the whole time I was with my Grandma. When I come home the Ferret cage was back in the living room in its normal spot. About 10 minutes later I notice the water bottle had been tilted so they couldn't get to it. So I fixed it and noticed they weren't coming out (I figured they were sleeping in the bottom under all the blankets) so I opened up the door and moved around the blankets and they were not in there. Then I notice one of the side doors open. I told my mom whom was in the bathroom fixing it up- and she said they were obviously out because everything was toppled over, etc. So I was looking for them and look on the lamp table in front of the window. I look out and see my ferret laying there. Not moving. And I see my dad hovering over him. I ran out to the living room crying and told my mom "My ferret, he got out the window" and my mom had no idea what I was talking about. I try and rush out to the back- and my dad was coming in telling me to stay inside. We can't find our other ferret. Karen, I feel so horrible, I feel responsible. I didn't want to leave them here, I had a bad feeling about it. And as I was leaving to go to my grandma's, I went to the back room to make sure the cats were in there, and I looked in the cage and they were both looking right at me laying in their hammock. They were sooo cute. I don't know how the door to the cage got open. I also feel responsible because I think they opened it, we had to buy these hook things so they couldn't. And that door didn't have one on it, because I thought it was too high for them to force open. I feel so horrible, I love them SO much. Just the other night I had my ferret all wrapped up in a blanket watching a movie. and Hunter's ferret- he was so goofy always getting into things. Gosh, I miss them so much already. I feel so horrible, I let them down with not caring for them the absolute best I could. I feel sick at my stomach not knowing if Hunter's ferret is out there somewhere with no food and no water, nowhere warm to sleep. Out there to defend him by himself. I went around the block knocking on everyones door telling them to look out for a ferret, and to please catch him and contact me if they find him, only for them to laugh at me and tell me they will do so if they ever find him. I went into the people behind our house's backyard. They weren't home- but I didn't care. I walked all around the neighborhood. I am calling the vets tomorrow and the shelters. I feel so so so so horrible, I miss them so much,I'm looking across the living room- only to see an empty hammock. I feel so sick to my stomach. I feel so guilty about my ferret- I let my boy down. I don't know if Barkley got to him, or the fall from the window seal to the lava rocks killed him. I just can't take the guilt. He was so cute, and so sweet, and so lovable. My brother should be home tonight around 10. He's been gone all weekend. He comes home around 10.
