Don Juan insisted on writing this himself....
hi ludwig mom says we could be brothers only i ended up at the humane society hope you didn't get the same vet who cut off my b***s don't worry about your mom saying bad cat my mom says it all the time especially when i try to climb over the fence i think it means shes sorry and she loves you glad youre so vigilant about those birds they are really cleverly disguised terrorists and remember you gotta check the cupboards for terrorists too osama could be anywhere congrats on your special day wishing you a nice fat mouse and extra treats and spoiling yr friend don juan