Printable View
Just curious.
I plan to let my children decide for themselves, as long as they are not hurting themselves, someone else, or forcing their beliefs onto someone else.
Why? Because my future-children may "be a part of me", but they are (in the future) different people than I am, thus they have their own minds and can decide who/what they want to be.
How can you "make" your child do anything? They could even fake it, it they wanted, just due to your "rules". I would hope that the way I live my life would encourage my child to follow my beliefs. So far, so good, but one can never know for sure until their children are adults. "Making" one do something is rarely the right path, at least as far as religion is concerned, I think.
My two cents.
Logan
PS. I did not vote.
I don't believe you can make anyone do anything, but I know some people who are forced to go to religious private schools and believe in what their parents do, which they would rather go to a normal public school and rather not believe in their parents beliefs..Quote:
Originally posted by Logan
How can you "make" your child do anything? They could even fake it, it they wanted, just due to your "rules". I would hope that the way I live my life would encourage my child to follow my beliefs. So far, so good, but one can never know for sure until their children are adults. "Making" one do something is rarely the right path, at least as far as religion is concerned, I think.
My two cents.
Logan
PS. I did not vote.
The question is though, would you be upset if your child did not believe in what you did?
I would let Jaden decide for himself. I would not be angry, but I would be very disappointed if his beliefs were drastically different then mine though. I want him to believe in and love God. All the minor details of religion wouldn't bother me much though.
He's his own individual person though. I can only try my best to lead him. The choices that me makes in life are up to him.
I can only hope, KayAnn, that the way I live and what I believe will make an inpact on my children's lives. I have one blood related daughter, Helen, and two step children. Scott and I try very hard to live right and have the children live up to our expectations.
Would I be disappointed if they ventured away from our beliefs? Yes, you'd better believe it, I would. If they were to choose another religion, another lifestyle,etc, it would be disappointing. But would I love them less? Absolutely not!!! We all do what we can as far as loving and letting our children know what we believe and hope that some of that will "stick", but we have no assurances. The best thing we can do is live by example, and that is what my husband and I try to do, as well as my ex-husband and his wife (how good is that?? :) ) How many parents out there have lived right, tried to teach the right values, and had children that went the other way? Tons of them, for sure. We just do what we can and hope for the best. I hope this is enough.
since i grew up with no religion i want my children (if i have any) to grow up with no religion then they can decide for themsleves when they are old enough.
All you can do with children is raise them with the beliefs you follow and then send them out into the world with all of the information they've learned throughout the years. If they decide to follow another religion, then its up to them to do so.
I had a friend who was absolutely appaled that her Catholic daughter converted to Judiasm. It wasn't the daughter converted... it was the fact that the the daughter had no problem putting aside the emotional attachment and feelings of Mary, Jesus... the whole New Testament. She couldn't understand why the daughter embraced the new religion without feeling tossed around logically.
Think about it: many of us define our lives through our religion whether or not we are consciously aware of it. I love Hydrengas (sp?) because they remind me of 2nd grade when we had the May procession and the beautiful wreath of flowers around Mary's head... how can I tie that memory and the tenderness and reverence I felt/feel for Mary when I'm changing religions to the belief that she did not exist? Thats a bit hard... and thats what the mother was upset and concerned about. I'd never be able to switch because of that emotional attachment. Did I make myself clear? I hope so.:D
My mom and I were talking about this a few days ago.
My family isn't very 'religious', so to speak, but we consider ourselves Catholic. My mom was brought up to believe in God; she went to chuch every single Sunday, was baptized, read the Bible, etc. but now that she has my sister and I, she isn't strict at all concerning things like that. We still go to church a couple times a year, but basically only for holidays. She would not be disappointed, betrayed, or anything like that if we chose to follow a different religion, and the same goes with my father. IMO, a child should be allowed to follow whatever religion they choose, as long as they aren't hurting themselves, other people, or forcing their beliefs on other people like you said.
Since I don't plan to have any kids in my life, I don't think I can answer this. :p
Logan has done a beautiful job in answering this question for me. I almost felt I didn't need to reply. :) Would I be upset if they chose a different faith? - most definitely. Would I love them less. Absolutely not!!! The Bible says "train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it." My husband is quick to point out to me the words "when he is old." In other words most children and people in general go through phases and changes in their lives. He feel that what this is saying that they may have the inclination to depart from what they were taught as children, but the seed has taken root and will not die but rather take hold and bear fruit as they mature. Fortunately for me I really don't have to worry as my children are grown and have embraced our faith and believe it for themselves wholeheartedly. I couldn't vote because I wouldn't be mad, but I sure would have been sad.
I didn't vote either, Pam. I just couldn't. All we can do is live our lives, speak out when we have the opportunity, and hope for the best. If any of your ever have questions about our Christianity, all you have to do is ask. There are many of us hoping and ready to answer. :)
Love you all, regardless of your beliefs.
Logan
My children will be making their own decision here, it often seems that children who have religion drummed into them day and night, rebell and go the other way, I think a nice happy medium is probably best.,but is that ever achievable.?
I Have to ask myself though, because I offer my kids no beliefs, does that mean they will also choose not to have religion in their lives, so far it seems to be the case, my son certainly has not chosen to, and I don't think my daughter will either.
I Just wonder if I am doing them an injustice, although my daughter has had the opportunity to be amongst several different religions and race due to her choice of friends, which I think can only be a good thing.,I do often wonder if I am doing the right thing, but I Cannot pretend to have a belief I don't have just to give my children these choices.
Does anyone understand where I am coming from on this one?just curious?
P.S if either my children choose a particular religion , I would support their choice.
I think you're doing absolutely fine, Carole.
No matter how sheltered (not saying your children are) or how out there someone is, we're ALWAYS going to run into different and many religions. It's up to that person, in my opinion, to follow what they want. If they chose not to have religion in their lives, then that's completely their choice. If they chose to, that's their choice as well. Only their choice.
I'm not religious and don't plan to have children, but IF I did, I hope I'd be open minded enough to give the child a broad religious education and allow him/her to make a decision.
If I've been entrusted to raise a child, the least I could do is provide an open mind and develop the same in my offspring.
(as long as the little bugger doesn't become a zealous Amway seller ;))
I would be upset if my child turned out to be a drug-addict, an alcoholic or a criminal.
I would be thrilled if my child found a belief - ANY belief - that led him to live a good life, and be a good person.
To truly love a child is to let go of that child, and watch them live their own lives. The best we can hope for is that they are happy, productive, healthy people. What religion - if any - they choose sometimes should be the very least of a parents worries.
I could not vote either.
I believe that God has given mankind the freedom of choice. No one can force something upon anyone else. I will definitely raise my children with faith, teaching them about our religion, about God, about the Prophets, about Heaven and Hell, about what we believe in, etc. I will give them a clear picture of their faith, who they are, etc. while they are young. Of course, when kids grow up, every individual chooses what they want themselves. I cannot say I would be *angry* if my kids decided to choose a different faith. I would be heartbroken.............I would be sad, BUT, I will raise my kids with faith, and hopefully they will choose what they see as right, just as I did. I wish to teach my children the values I grew up with. My parents never forced me with anything..........just taught me, and when I grew up, I chose to stay on my faith on my own, because I see it as light, as guidance, as something that keeps me from going astray, as something that gives me a vision for my life, for my future, and it is something that makes so much sense to me. I can only pray that my kids will grow up to see God's teachings as light and guidance too, and I can hope and pray that they would never stray from God's teachings. I will try my best to raise them in a way that faith would be something deeply embedded in their hearts and souls. I *would* be disappointed if they left their faith. I would not love them any less, but I would be sad.