Doggy Dictionary (cute)

I just got this emailed and I thought it was really cute.

Doggy Dictionary

LEASH: A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead
your person where you want him/her to go.

DOG BED: any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.

DROOL: Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To do this properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad and let the drool fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.

SNIFF: A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place your nose as close as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhale deeply, repeat several times, or until your person makes you stop.

GARBAGE CAN: A container which your neighbors put out once a week to test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to push the lid off with your nose. If you do it right you are rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.

BICYCLES: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards; the person then swerves and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.

DEAFNESS: This is a malady which affects dogs when their person want them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.

THUNDER: This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling your eyes wildly, and following at their heels.

WASTEBASKET: This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old candy wrapper. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the house until your person comes home

SOFAS: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is
polite to run up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean.

BATH: This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.

LEAN: Every good dogs's response to the command "sit !", especially if your person is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective before black-tie events.

BUMP: The best way to get your human's attention when they are drinking a fresh cup of coffee or tea.

GOOSE BUMP: A maneuver to use as a last resort when the Regular Bump doesn't get the attention you require.....especially effective when combined with The Sniff. See above.

LOVE: Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and without
restriction. The best way you can show your love is to wag your tail. If you're lucky, a human will love you in return.

I love that! Thank you!

CUTE! CUTE! CUTE!

LOL!!! :D

Oh my gosh! I am laughing so loud that the dogs are wondering what is wrong with me. If they only knew! :) They are guilty of them all too! Thanks for the laugh!!

I love it!!!

Mine are expecially fond of the words:Drool-which Angus is a pro at;) , Goose bump-Roxey is famous for this one, and Love-Huney is the tail wagger of the bunch and lets us know just how much she loves us!

Thanks so much for this slick:D

That is great--I love it!!!!

Mine have obviously read this dictionary. Jada is wonderful at the goose bump, Riley shows the love, Kito must be deaf, and Abbey definitely uses the sofa properly!!!!!

Thankyou! That was great! Jojo and Tiny has that dictionary. LOL!

It's great! Where do people get stuff like that? lol! :p

That is really cute.:) Thank you.

That's absolutely adorable! Thanks for the good laugh :)

Moose is especially fond of --> Leash, Drool, Deafness, Thunder, and Wastebasket. ;):rolleyes: But I've got to admit....he's awfully fond of Love. :) :D

:D April has love, dogbed, sofa, and deafness down pat! Thanks, that was funny and cute.