*sigh* I think I need to vent...
You don't even have to read this... I just need to get it off my chest.
I don't even know where to start.
I had my yearly 'performance review' with my manager this morning. It started out really well, over-all I got an 'above average' rating. Yes, the company rates their employees :rolleyes: However, my manager believes I need to be more 'proactive'. I guess I agree with him... I am in some-what of a position of authority in my department (one step below my manager - called a lead) and I'm the only lead in the department. Apparently some of my co-workers have said that I'm 'unapproachable'. I honestly don't understand why, I try to be friendly, we've always gotten along (I've worked there for 4 years, most of my co-workers have been there at least 2), and I try to help them when needed. I am a very quiet person by nature and tend to stay busy and keep to myself a lot, but I never realized that was a problem :confused: I know my manager didn't mean any harm by that statement, but it stressed me out most of the day. He said I need to become more comfortable with asking others to do things for me so I don't become so overwhelmed. I explained to him that being 19 & significantly younger than the majority of my co-workers that it isn't always easy. I sometimes feel like I get that 'who does she thinks she is?!?' attitude. He said to me that they all know that you're knowledgeable of the operations that go on in our department and should respect you regardless of your age. yadda yadda yadda...
So that was this morning, which, now doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
After work my boyfriend calls to tell me that he is, well, basically homeless :( He *was* still living at home, but there's been a lot of turmoil between him and his mom for a long time. John, my boyfriend, is amazing with computers. He used to be employed as a computer tech and still can do just about anything dealing with electronics. His mom has been trying to get John to do some big computer project for her work. John works full time at another job so it's not like he can just go over there any old time and do it. So his mom started to get a little angry that John was working around his schedule and not her's :rolleyes: ... this has been going on for days... Finally, today John told her, forget it, find someone else, I'm sick of arguing with you, I'm not doing it. And his mom responded by saying, get your stuff you're going to do it right now or I'm kicking you out that door. John grabbed his coat and left :( Honestly, a part of me is relieved that he got out of that house. It drove me crazy the way that women treated him sometimes :mad: And all that over a stupid computer job!! :mad: He's staying with his dad tonight (his parents are divorced, obviously), but he won't be able to for long. I told him he's welcome here, but since I still live at home I'm sure my parents won't be to keen on my boyfriend staying here for a long period of time. :p But they like John, and I know they'll help him out. He has one job now, but will probably need to take on a second. We're both going back to college in November and now he doesn't even know if he will be able to. :( The two of us have talked about moving out together (we've known each other for almost 4 years & have been together going on 3), somewhere closer to our school, but neither of us were ready for this :mad: So, I don't know what is going to happen... We might keep the old plan and I'll move out with him (that would probably eliminate his need for a second job), but he says I don't need to. I was hoping to move out before November anyway... But AHHHHH I'm just so mad at his mother!! :mad: I just don't know what to do... I have family visiting from Las Vegas tomorrow through Sunday... not convenient timing, it's going to keep me from John, but hopefully it'll cheer me up a bit.
Well, thanks for letting me write. This 'ventage' really does help. I hope I don't sound whiny or like I'm crying out for attention. I'm just stressed, angry, and want to cry for John so bad :(
