Ovarian Cancer - Need to vent

Ok, I need to vent about this....my maternal grandmother was diagnosed with stage 4 (i think) ovarian cancer about a month or so ago. The doctor told my mom that Granma has less than a year to live. Most of the family has been making the five hour trek to see her. My two uncles, aunt, parents, and about 7 cousins have already been to see her.

It is now going to be my turn this weekend. My parents are driving up wih my brother and sister (all us kids are mid to late twenties) and will be picking up my husband and I so we can all go together. Luckily, since my best friend just moved to my city, she can dog-sit for us.

I just don't know what to do. I feel completely helpless. My husband has been very understanding and supportive about the whole thing. I just feel like I will be a complete mess when I see her. She has lost so much weight, mainly due to a failed attempt at chemo.

I have been trying to be strong for my mother mainly, just be a sounding board for her when she needs to vent, and try to be "there" for her emotionally. She's had things so hard so far. We lost my granpa (her dad) to a brain aneurysm when I was 5, we lost my aunt (her older sister) to multiple sclerosis when I was 12, and most recently last October, we lost my uncle (one of her younger brothers) to a sudden massive heart attack. I have to say, through all of this with Granma and my uncle, I have gained a new respect for the amount of strength my mother has.

I am just so "nasty feeling in the pit of my stomach" about this situation. I cry whenever I think about it. I mean, I am happy that I will be able to see her, but extremely sad because I think this might be the last time I do see her.

I guess part of growing up is losing people you love due to various illnesses and whatnot, but sometimes I just wish I was a kid again and didn't have to think about death so much.

Thank you so much for letting me vent, I feel a bit better.

I am really sorry. I can relate because my cousin has breast cancer.
But at least she'll be spending time with you and the rest of the family.

I'm so sorry to hear about that. :( I know its hard, very hard. Hang in there and spend the most time you can with her. I feel for you. :(

I am so sorry to hear that. A good friend of mine just recovered from ovarial cancer but it was stage 1 that she had and it took 2 surgeries and a 3 months period of chemotherapy.

I am afraid stage 4 has a very bad prognosis.

It must be so difficult not being able to help and just to watch how a beloved person feels.

I wish all the strength of the world to you and your family and especially your grandmother. Be sure that it will be a comfort for her when people are just around and offer their hands:)

I understand what it's like to have to see people in your family dying. In the last 5 years or so, my mother has seen her mother, father, 1 sister & 3 brothers, 1 sister-in-law & 1 brother-in-law die:( I sometimes wonder how she goes on.

My aunt died of breast cancer just a couple of years ago & it was a long hard strugle for her. So I will definately be thinking of you when you visit your grandmother.

Anna

When you see your grandmother, be positive and
let her know how much you love her.
You might even want to look at old family pics in the
photo alblums with her when you were little etc.
and talk about all the funny stories you had
together. I am sure she will like the attention.
It's so hard to loose or have someone so close to
you that is very ill, and it never gets any easier as you get older.
My thoughts are with you and your family.


HUGS!!!

My grandfather died in 1996 and I regret not getting to know him better. He only spoke Italian so I never was able to communicate with him (I can only understand, not speak it). Then he died of a heart attack. :(

I guess you should be thankful that you have this time with her however I am very sorry that this had to happen. Give your mother a hug from me, she is a very strong woman. My thoughts are with you.