Lost my friend

I don't often come on here to start a thread but last week I buried a friend - a human friend.
She wasn't someone you could count on, not someone who did much or accomplished much, as a matter of fact she sometimes made you wish she would go away..she did and I hate myself for thinking this on some of her weird days.
She was what you could call a manic, at least that's what she was labelled as. She had severe aggressive conduct disorder and some days would be so manic it was enough to drive you up a wall if she would call. She could either be high as a kite or down in the bottom of the barrel.We talked her into getting help...yes, we all talked her into getting help....they treated her with Carbolith. At first we thought it was going to be a miracle. Then we started noticing what the side effects were doing - worse than she was before actually. For the last 2 yrs her health plumetted badly but no one would listen. We tried to explain to her docs that she couldn't stay on that stuff...all to no avail.
To make a long story short. between the moods and aggression she finally went overboard. her kidneys had been affected, her skin showed signs that were unhealthy , she was just going downhill until they found her in bed . That stuff actually ended her life. I know she's fianlly at peace, her demons put to rest, but I still blame the doctors who just wanted her out of hteir hair and didn't listen to the obvious signs.
I guess what I'm trying to say is please watch what meds you are taking and olease listen to your friends if they notice things are not right...get help, change doctors if need be.
Sorry, I guess this is long but I had to let it out.

I am sorry for your loss. There is still so much we do not know about how the human brain works, and doesn't, and how thing affect it.

At least she is now at peace.

Shepgirl, my sympathy to you.

A dear friend of mine died almost 2 months ago, they think she had a stroke. She was my best friend in the church youth group in high school; we're the same age. We lost touch for awhile and then became even closer after I finished college. I miss her very much!

My sympathies for your loss. Your friend is now at peace, no more inner demons to torment her. May you find peace w/this situation as well.

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Originally Posted by shepgirl

She wasn't someone you could count on, not someone who did much or accomplished much, as a matter of fact she sometimes made you wish she would go away..she did and I hate myself for thinking this on some of her weird days.

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I'm sorry for your loss. And I understand exactly what you mean about feeling guilty for your less-than-kind-thoughts about her. I, too, had a friend and employee like that. She was a hypochondriac and a prescription drug addict. She could be so very sweet and kind, but when she wanted pills she would go to ANY means to get the - lying, stealing, back-stabbing, you name it.

When she passed away, I felt very bad for all the unkind things I had thought about and said to her over the years. However, the more I thought about it, I realized that every harsh but truthful thing I said to her was to try to help her, not hurt her. I tried to get her to see the realit of her situation before it was too late. That's why it's called "tough love".

Your friend is healed now. Somewhere, she is seeing you and saying, "Don't feel bad. You tried. It was my fault, not yours. And I'm better now!"

I am sorry for your loss. :(

Your friend will know that you cared enough about her to worry and that you tried to help. *HUGS* may she rest in peace now, free from the demons that plagued her in this life.

My prayers to you for your loss.

What a tortured life and a terrible decline your friend went through.

I hope her death might make some impression on her doctors (I am not holding my breath) so that someone else can be spared this. I can only hope that some small good thing will come out of this.:(

{{{hugs}}} I hope you and all her friends find some comfort in the days ahead. Peace to her family as well.

The human brain can be such a pit :( and too many don't crawl back out.

I am so sorry....:(. I wish her doctors had listened to you all...., but they hardly never do that :rolleyes:

RIP, Shepgirl's friend!

:( Oh I am so saddened to read this.. RIP Friend

Thanks for letting me shove this on your shoulders everyone.
Twister Dog I had to look where you were from, scared the heck out of me, I thought you were one of us by the description you were using. Guess it shows there are more people like that than we know, I can tell you've felt the same way I do .
Yeah, some docs don't listen, that Carbolith is pure crap, but he didn't have time or patience for her.
Thank you for the kind words and thoughts, maybe you're right - she is at peace.

I'm so very sorry :( We love our friends, even with faults. We have faults ourselves. Try not to feel guilty. She must have had a very hard time in life with those emotions running wild like that. I'm sure she appreciated the few people like you that were her friend.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think it's normal for us to feel somewhat guilty when a friend or relative passes. We always wonder if there was more that we could have done, been there for them more, etc. Don't feel bad. I'm sure she knew you loved her while she was here.

May she Rest In Peace.:(

With all Dr's know there is still so much they cannot treat, heal or fix. Your friend suffered a great deal........... I truly feel for her and all her knew and loved her. She is at peace now. Perhaps her message to us was one of understanding, forgiving and learning. Embrace the happy times. Hugs, Marigold