I need some help....

[gemini9961]

I am at work and hubby just called to tell me Grant is going back to the pound. Grant has chewed up the arm of our couch. Of course, I do not know the extent of the damage but hubby is pissed. He has never really bonded to Grant, even though HE picked him out. At the time he did not know how an ACD would act. It was rough when we first got Grant as some might remember, I was myself going to take him back to the pound because he was destructive. Given the nature of the breed they need a lot of exercise and activity. However, hubby does not fulfill this when I am not there. I work 12 hour days with a 2 hour travel time total to get to and from work. Hubby has long days too. Grant is in all honesty not getting the exercise he needs and he is letting us know now by starting his destructive habits again. I try my hardest to work with him, but with my schedule he does not get the time he needs. I love him dearly, and I am struggling with this. Am I being fair to him and his needs by not having the time to spend with him like he needs? I know I am not. The breed is most likely not the breed for us, but like I said before, hubby brought him home because I wanted another dog. I need some positive/honest truth about this. Please no bashing me because of this. I am being totally honest and saying we don't have the time for him and his needs so please don't hate me for it. I would rather let a rescue take him and find him a suitable home if it comes to that. Hubby has made some awful statements this morning about the fate of Grant and now I fear it's going to cause trouble between us if I don't do something soon.

Feeling like a horrible Mom and need some PT help,
Amber


**Edit: No need to reply to this. I am sending hubby to get a crate for him, we never got one before and that was mistake #1.

[RobiLee]

Amber, I don't really have any advice for you but I just wanted to let you know that my heart goes out to you. I hope you guys can figure things out. I'm glad you are going to try a crate. My girls were both crate trained and I think it was the best thing that we ever did and it really saved us from alot of destructive behavior. I was lucky though and they both took to their crates really well. I hope it works out that way for you. I know it is hard but hopefully you can figure out some way for Grant to get more exercise too. He sounds like the kind of dog that needs to feel useful and have a job.

Best of luck and {{BIG HUGS}} for you!

[Kfamr]

I was going to ask if you ever invested in a crate. My offer still stands that you can borrow ours. We have one that is just colaspsed under my bed.

I'm so sorry you're having so much difficult with him. He's such a sweet boy and I myself would be heartbroken to see him leave, I can't imagine how you'd feel.


Do you all have a dog park near you? If you do, maybe you can start taking him there for an hour or so?

[gemini9961]

Nope, no dog park anywhere near us. Like I said hubby will be going today to get a crate and he'll have to get used to it. I have been putting him in the laundry room when we are not there and he has been good in there. He sleeps in the living room at night and this morning when I left for work the couch was fine. Sometime between the time I left for work and when hubby got up is when he decided to tear up the couch. He needs some discipline/structure and I am going to have to enforce to him that I am the leader and he is not. I tear up thinking up giving him up and I know in my heart that I can't do that. I will just have to work on him some more. Maybe I should get a bike and he can run with me.

[Ginger's Mom]

Oh Amber, I am so sorry to hear that you are all going through this, I am sure that it is hard on everyone, including the girls. I don't have any real thoughts or advise, just a lot of empathy for what you are going through. You came home to find a dog you never even discussed getting in the garage, and worked sooo hard to make him a part of your family. I do not know what I would do, but I will be keeping you in my thoughts.

[BC_MoM]

Would it be possible to get him into some Obedience classes (even if he's been in them before) or Flyball or Agility? He might need a job. Aside from physical excersise, they also need mental excersise. Does he like Kongs?

Could you try rehoming yourself, worst case scenario, and ask for an adoption fee to make sure he goes to a good home? I hate seeing animals go back into cages at pounds. :(

Best of luck to your family with Grant! :) If I weren't in Canada, I'd take him in a heartbeat.

[gemini9961]

We don't have any Flyball or Agility around us. I have ordered some books on training to refresh myself. I need to start all over with him. I have only had him since August, he's 2 so you can see I didn't get him as a pup. I have no earthly idea what his life was like before us. :( He has tons of toys, Kongs included. He destroys all the plush toys I give him as well as tennis balls and ropes. I know he needs a "job" and at this moment in time I wish we already had our house built on the property we own. He would have over an acre to run on and amuse himself. Our yard is decent size for him now but I guess he needs more. If worse comes to worse and we have to rehome him, I will go through a rescue, he won't go back to the pound.

[Jadapit]

Ebony has so much engery if I dont give her a lot of excersise she is bouncing off the walls. She is crate trained so that does help a lot. She always goes in her crate when we go somewhere. My hubby got me a new bike for Christmas, my son got me the springer. Have you heard of those? You hook the dog up to them and they ride along with you on the bike. It is awesome! Ebony loves it and it gives her a good work out. It is well worth the money. You might think about getting one. I bet it would help Grant out a lot. Best of luck to you and Grant. (((Hugs)))

[pnance]

I'm so sorry to hear your going through this Amber, it's really hard to handle a dog that can be destructive, and I can fully understand why you'd consider finding him a new home. I don't know if this will help, but I went through something similiar with Hunter. He's not an ACD but he's part shepard and part lab, meaning not only does he need mental stimulation, but he needs excersize. I'm like you I work 8-10 hour days and have at least a 1.5 hour drive both ways. I live with roomates, but they don't really do anything to help get rid of some of that energy, besides letting him out. My other 3 play with him, but that's wasn't enough either. When he was younger I originally had him in my bathroom, he ripped up the vinyl flooring, and chewed the bottom of the door and cabinet. So I invested in a crate for him. He wasn't a big fan at first, but now has no problems. Hunters big problem though was not a constant destructive chewing, he only did it sometimes and there was no rhym or reason. He'd go through a week to a month of completely destructive behavior then nothing for months. He chewed the couch arm, my roomates oldfashioned wood radio, a table leg (I could go on but you get the idea). All this was when my roomates were home. I started crating him when I left for work and my roomates were still asleep. They'd let him out when they got up. At night he slept in my room and I never had any problems then. Basically we made a rule, if you walked outside or were in your room with the door shut, he had to be put in his crate. I also began taking him for at least a 10 min walk every other night when I got home (even in the dark) and having at least a 10 min play session w/him when I got home, not ideal, but better than nothing. Weekends usually entailed going for a long walk at least 1 of the days. We haven't had any problems with him in about 8 months. I've even slowly been leaving him out of his crate when we're not home and still nothing, toys all over the place sure, but beyond that nothing chewed.

If you do decide to rehome him could I suggest if possible trying to find an ACD rescue group. Since they know the breed they may have a better idea than the pound of what he needs.

I wish you the best of luck with this and if you just want to talk feel free to PM me.

[gemini9961]

Thanks everyone for the positive wishes. I have heard of the springer on the bike. I have thought of that. I will have to see how well he does with the crate. I know he probably won't like it at first, but I need to save my house. :eek: I will have to look into the bike with the springer later on. I am just going to have to take him out more often for walks, even if it's at night and I have worked all day long (12+ hours). I don't want to give up on him since he was given up on before we got him. :(