PDA

View Full Version : Six months...



Glacier
10-26-2005, 01:16 PM
Today is exactly six months since Dominique died. Six months since I came home to find her little, broken body in the yard. I wish I could get that image out of my mind, but it is seared there forever. I try to remember the way I had seen her earlier in the day, when she was safely in the kitty enclosure, hunting flies and jumping in the tall grass, perfect, healthy and full of life.

I miss the little munchkin so much. I miss hearing her tags jingle as she raced through the house. Dominique only had two speeds, full out or sound asleep. I miss the feel of her silky fur beside me at night; she always slept under blankets sharing my pillow. As soon as I went to bed, she would jump on my pillow and bat my cheek until I lifted the quilt for her to snuggle under. I miss her little mew that she always let out in anticipation of being petted. I miss her demanding little squawks when she wanted to be fed, picked up or wanted a Pounce treat. I miss her tiny little paws with their little white boots. She always let me play with her paws, not many cats put up with that. It snowed yesterday. She loved to play in the fresh snow. She would have loved to chase the snowflakes last night. I missed her when I washed the dog harnesses. She loved to roll around in the smelly dog equipment. Silly cat! I miss her everytime I leave a bit of water in the dogs' bucket. She tipped that thing every day and if I left any water in it, she had a great time making a mess!

I miss all my bridgekids, but Dominique's death has been particularly difficult. She was only five and I expected to have many more years with her. There was nothing I could have done to save Hoodoo, although I would have done anything. Twicket was elderly and it was simply his time. Both of them had peaceful, gentle crossings with me holding their paws. I can't allow my mind to consider what Dom's last moments were like. My vet assures me she went quickly, but the images in my head are filled with pain and fear. I have struggled to forgive myself for letting her outside. We have never found exactly how she got out, but she slipped past me somehow. I have struggled to forgive my dogs and rebuild my relationship with them. They did not mean to break my heart. I know they wouldn't ever do anything to intentionally hurt me.

I miss you, little one. Say hi to Twicket and Hoodoo for me. I love you all always.

Cinder & Smoke
10-26-2005, 01:34 PM
I miss the little munchkin so much.

I miss you, little one.
Say hi to Twicket and Hoodoo for me.
I love you all always.

Your Love http://petoftheday.com/i/our_smilies/smile.gif shows in your Tribute.

{{{Hugs}}}

Queen of Poop
10-26-2005, 01:54 PM
Tears flow for both you and Dominique. Dominique has left her paw print on your heart, hang onto that for now until you two are reunited in the great beyond. Remember, that she is always with you, always watching you.

jenluckenbach
10-26-2005, 01:55 PM
I have shed tears for fellow pet talkers many times before, but this time I am in an all out bawl. I am so sorry that this haunts you so. As I read what you describe I am right there with you seeing this dreadful moment. I was subjected to a violent death of a pet once when I was a teen, and the damage was done, not by another animal who was only acting on instincts, but by a human. Thank God I did not witness the act itself, but the scene of the outcome remains with me, as does yours. I wish there were a way to make you feel at least a little better. Time helps.

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

furrykidsmother
10-26-2005, 02:36 PM
My eyes are watering so badly it is difficult to type this, but please try to forgive yourself. She know how much you miss her and what a struggle it has been for you. I hope that one day soon, you will only carry good memories of her with you.

rg_girlca
10-26-2005, 07:14 PM
Oh gosh, how my heart goes out to you. Please try not to beat yourself up over this. It was a terrible and unfortunate accident.
I pray that in time those terrible images will fade from your memory and be replaced by pictures of your happy Dominique. She will always be in your heart.

((((((HUGS))))))

Barbara
10-27-2005, 05:16 AM
I am so sorry for you. We all try to make no mistakes- to get everything right and it is impossible. :( Not everything is under our control. As a matter of fact most things are not. (The more responsible people we are the more wew tend to forget that.)

I am sure Dominique has forgiven you. She had a wonderful life the time it lasted.

Me too I have pictures in my heart that I'll never forget but we humans can only survive by concentrating with all our will one the warmer happier pictures.

Cataholic
10-27-2005, 08:41 AM
Glacier, my heart breaks for you and your RB. Time, sweetie, time....you two shall meet again, and you will understand there is no malice in her heart, nor in the dogs. It was life. Cruel, ugly, and painful. She holds no grudges, and waits for you, patiently.

catmandu
10-27-2005, 10:00 AM
I know what you mean.I was forever going to adopt Orange Blossom,the big Orangie that was living here,part time.
He was a good Cat,but I put him out so he wouldnt spray in the Hotel.
Then I found him dead on the Front Lawn, avictim of a hit and run accident,a deliberate murder,as he was well off the road.
I hope that you can forgive yourself,as you didnt mean for Dominique to come to any harm.
And your Dogs were catching prey,a natural instinct in some breeds.
Guilt is a terrible burden to sarry,and I know that Dominique bears you no ill will,and will wait with Orange Blossom to see us,One Fine Day.

Ally Cat's Mommy
10-27-2005, 11:15 AM
I am typing through the tears here. Dominique will always be watching over you from the Bridge. You two have such a special connection, and that will never be broken. You gave her five wonderful years. (((HUGS)))

caseysmom
10-28-2005, 01:16 PM
I am so sorry for your pain, hopefully in time it will be easier to bear.

ramanth
11-03-2005, 12:05 PM
Glacier, I know how you feel. One part of your tribute stuck out. You said she was only 5 and you expected to spend more years with her.

Chance, my black and white beauty, went missing when he was only 5. I'll never know what happened to him but in my heart I know he's at the RB.

I hope he and Dominique are having fun together. I know I'll see him again.

*HUGS*

kimlovescats
11-03-2005, 08:53 PM
I am so very sorry that you are still dealing with so much guilt in Dom's passing. Please realize that you were not to blame. You had five wonderful years together, and Dominique knew true love from you!

Hugs,
Kim

catmandu
11-04-2005, 07:53 AM
I feel the same way when I saw Orange Blossom hit by a car.He had been visiting and did not want to leave.
But I knew that he was another Persons Cat,so I put him out.
And when I came home,somene had run him down,either through carelessness or on purpose.
These things sadly happen,and Dominique does not blame you,or the Dogs.
She is happy being a Pet Talker Angel Cat,and goes all over the World.And she will have so many stories to meeow to her Meowmie,when you meet again,One Fine Day.

Sonia59
11-04-2005, 11:32 AM
It was a terrible accident. These things happen, as well as good things. Dominique knows how much you loved her and shes knows it is forever.
Hugs

finn's mom
11-04-2005, 03:29 PM
My heart broke a little bit, too, when Dominique passed. I imagine I would feel the same guilt that you do, although we all know that you have done for your pets everything that you can do. It's especially hard when they leave so young. This is a beautiful tribute to a beautiful kitty.