mean cat - need advice!

[denise52358]

I have been with my partner for 5 years and she has a male neutered, declawed cat...that hates me. The cat always hisses when I am around and on several occasions has come up behind me (like when I am the stove cooking or sink doing dishes) and sank his teeth into my bare leg. Then he goes "crazy" and does the evil cat screaming with the huge puffed out fur and tail and flattened ears. I have tried spraying him with a water bottle, canned air, etc and nothing makes him stop. This last time, he bit me three times in the back of my upper calf and I finally had to run into the bedroom and slam the door as he tried to get in after me. This cat is insane. He hates me but loves seems to love his owner - although he sometimes i s aggressive towards her too.
I might mention that I am not a cat person but I have never done anything to this cat to make him hate me. I catnip him, I attempt to talk to him and pet him which gets me "yelled" at and bit.
What is wrong here? Any advice?

[kb2yjx]

Wlcome to the forum!!! WOW!!! I am amazed! Usually cats KNOW when people do not like them, and usually go out of their way to be nice to the person!! This is scary...what the does the cat do when it gets aggressive to its person?

[denise52358]

and yes, it is scary. As I said, I am not a cat person but have never had an animal "hate" me...usually they like me. To be honest, I am afraid to be in the house alone with this animal now for fear of another attack. I do not want to be bitten again!

[kb2yjx]

Has the cat been neutered? How old? Has he always been like this?? How does he act towards that may come to visit???

[barncat]

If you are scared, this cat knows it. You are interfering with his person and he is used to ruling her and the territory. Then along comes you... Try to think like the cat. He is in competition with you and if you were another cat would be doing his best to drive you from the territory or at least make sure you knew you place as lower in the order than he is...

Be firm and do not back down. You might practice learning to hiss and yowl and when he starts in, turn and be bigger and louder than he is. (I usually have crouched and arched my paw ready to swat too, but you might, at this point actually have him come at you and if you aren't used to cats, you could get hurt.) cat bites are no joke and this cat is being aggressive because it feels threatened on some level. At this point your partner should be affectionate to you first and then to the cat...firmly putting the order in place. You should be gracious to the cat and move toward mutual tolerance whuich may turn to affection. This must be an uncomfortable situation for all of you and, if you have tried time and patience you should not have to be afraid of eah other. Establishing yourself as a power that is strong but not going to abuse should help everyone feel better.

Did your partner have a previous partner that was 1. mean to the cat, or 2.a favorite of the cat? In either case, my advice still stands but may give the cat added reason to want you gone. The same goes if the cat has witnessed his person in an abusive previous relationship...cats often collect baggage and try to help their people. In that case, again my advice stands but be very sure the cat sees you being gentle and nurturinng toward your partner...brush her hair while she pets the cat... it will be a catlike grooming activity that will help establish positive bonds within the "colony." If the cat will play laser-light chase with you ar any non-contact fun, try that. Catnip in some cats can make aggressive behavior stronger, so for now, I'd avoid it if I could. (Obviously if he has a favorite toy, don't take it.)

Hope you all work it out....

[carterscutie85]

He's jealous. If she had the cat before you he feels like your invading his territory since your a man. I had the same problem with Thomas-only he didn't take it that far. When I first got Thomas, my bf had a job but I did not, so he got used to me being around all day and not having to share me with another *Man*. When my bf would get home, if we tried to snuggle, he'd inch his way in between us. Sometimes he would just randomly go up to him and bite him and then come back to me. But Thomas got used to it though, he knows he's number 1 in my life lol
But yeah, animal's can sense fear. If they know your scared they will go with it. Don't put up with it. Maybe your partner could help you out and start punishing him when she sees him bite you/attack you. He's likely to see her as more of an authority figure since she's his owner.