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wolfsoul
08-30-2005, 09:37 AM
Toddlers Attack, Kill Pit Bull

by Tucker H. Johnson,
NA!P NewsWire


DENVER, Colo -- In a scene that seems to be playing out with growing regularity across the nation, three toddlers attacked and killed a pit bull yesterday afternoon. It was the seventh child attack on a pit bull in as many months in the Denver Metro area.

Maggie Hindler was walking her four-year-old pit bull, Max, in Washington Park around 3:00 PM when the three toddlers appeared out of nowhere and immediately began attacking her dog. Hindler says that she and Max did nothing to provoke the toddlers and that she didn't even see them until they were almost on top of her dog.

"We were just walking along," a visibly-shaken Hindler recalled. "We weren't doing anything. And suddenly, these little kids shot out of these bushes and attacked Max. He was helpless."

Hindler and several other bystanders tried to pull the toddlers off of max, without luck. Kent Randolph was one of the bystanders who tried to help Hindler, and he concedes that it was almost impossible to get the kids to stop their attack.

"I tried screaming at them, hitting them with sticks, prying at their jaws," Randolph said. "Nothing worked. They would turn and start to go at us for a second but then would immediately go back to attacking the dog. And you know how it is with them. Once they get their teeth into something, they just don't let go. Their little jaws are so strong."

Denver County passed an ordinance in 2001, banning the ownership of toddlers entirely. Anyone caught owning a toddler in Denver is subject to a $1000 fine and up to a year in jail. The toddlers are confiscated and are either euthanized at Denver Children's Hospital or sold for medical research.

"We have been telling the community about toddlers for years," Dr. Sally Jacobs, Chief of Child Psychology at Denver Children's Hospital, told The New News. "But a large part of the community doesn't listen. The facts are clear: Humans have been bread for centuries to do nothing by maim and kill. It's in their genes, in their nature, and nothing is going to change that. Not a good home or a loving family. That is why Denver outlawed toddlers several years ago. They are simply too dangerous to have in our community."

Thursday's scene is fairly typical of recent toddler attacks. At some point, the toddlers come together as a pack and end up in a place well-traveled by people and their dogs. They attack with little or no warning. They don't have collars, but they often have several juice boxes in their possession.

Denver police showed up on the scene shortly after the attack and were forced to kill the toddlers when they turned on police. Unfortunately, it was too late for poor Max. Needless to say, Hindler is just angry.

"Who can be so irresponsible to raise these things?" she said. "I mean, what if these toddlers had attacked another person? Or a cat?"

Lt. Steve Halfy of the Denver Police Department said that while they could not immediately identify the owner of the toddlers, they were following several leads.

"We'll find out whose kids these are, and we'll bring them to justice. This just sickens me. How many more dogs are going to have to die before people realize that these toddlers are killers, plain and simple."

lv4dogs
08-30-2005, 09:39 AM
Thats a good one!

Suki Wingy
08-30-2005, 10:15 AM
I like that one!

DJFyrewolf36
08-30-2005, 12:13 PM
LOL :D That is sooo funy!!

Bigyummydog
09-04-2005, 12:34 AM
OMG! I just saw this............does this mean, Takoda Blue will have to be PTS when he is of age? MAXIMUS just "had" him yesterday. MAXIMUS said, "He tastes soooo good" he can't wait till he is old enough to yank his ears and step on his paws, poke his pretty eyes and of course jump on his back and ride. Geez......where in the world will Takoda Blue have to go, when the ban of toddlers is inforced?

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y68/bigyummydog/100_0738.jpg

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y68/bigyummydog/100_0752.jpg
Takoda Blue and MAXIMUS

buttercup132
09-04-2005, 09:22 AM
lol i thought it was real at frist up until they said that they had to ban them

flamepony12
09-04-2005, 09:30 AM
haha :D

luvofallhorses
09-04-2005, 11:31 AM
Am I the only one that doesn't find this funny? :confused:

chocolatepuppy
09-04-2005, 07:18 PM
I don't think it's funny. Two wrongs don't make a right. I don't think this kind of 'humor' will help pitbulls at all. :(

wolfsoul
09-04-2005, 08:35 PM
It's not supposed to be funny. Whether or not someone finds it funny is a personal opinion. It is satire. It changes the way you think about things. I know if I hated pit bulls and I read this, it would certainly make me think about how I felt. That's what satire is. It's meant to create change. I don't find the article humorous -- but I find it refreshing to have the tables turned, even if it is only pretend.

Bigyummydog
09-04-2005, 10:48 PM
With all the "real" nonsense of pitbulls going on, I thought it was quite a bit refreshing. Everyone knows it can't be real. It sounded like a joke to me. With all the horrors and dispair in life, why can't we have a little joke. Sarcasm does get the point across. But, my mother always said, "Sarcasm is wasted on children and idiots." I'm not known here to get ugly on PT, but geez....... let's get a grip. :D :D :D :D :D

veegan
09-04-2005, 11:07 PM
yeah.. I didnt really find it funny either. on the one hand I can see how its supposed to be funny, playing on the fact that most pit bulls are as gentle and harmless as a toddler. but on the other hand I could also see how someone could interpret this as anti-pit bull, especially someone who was afraid of them. the story almost feels like its making light of toddlers being attacked by pit bulls. because I mean, obviously a toddler could never kill a pit bull, or do any of the things the story describes. even if a toddler did try to attack a pit bull, (or any dog) the dog could fight back. however, a toddler wouldnt stand a chance against a dog attack. and you know the story was written from a real story, they just swapped the pit bulls with toddlers, and thats what makes it not funny to me. maybe Im just being too uptight lol, but I just feel like its too outrageous, and not a topic that anyone should be laughing about. the topic of breed specific legislation/breed banning, and dog attacks is very complex, and I just dont feel this satire stands as a powerfully pro-pit/anti-BSL message at all.

EDIT: okay I just re-read the story (I never finished it the first time lol) and it did make me laugh toward the end, (the part about the juice boxes lol) but I still stand by what I said originally

chocolatepuppy
09-05-2005, 05:56 AM
let's get a grip.

I have a grip, and I realize this is sarcasm, and I have a right to my opinion. ;) This satire only makes me think of pitbulls killing toddlers. :(

veegan
09-05-2005, 01:06 PM
This satire only makes me think of pitbulls killing toddlers.

yeah thats basically what I felt too

wolfie
09-05-2005, 04:13 PM
Yeah, I didn't really find it funny either. Like veegan said, it doesn't seem pro pittie /anti BSL