ILoveMyAbbyGirl
08-07-2005, 08:34 PM
I'm done.
You see, my dad got another job as a part-time bartender at this place he golfs at. He's real good friends with the owners and they needed help badly, so he offered to help out a few nights a month and ended up with another part-time job.
My brother has soccer games Tuesdays and Thursdays. My dad works every Thursday in August at the Legion (golf/workplace). He asked my mom at the beginning of the month when he got his work schedule if she would be able to take Jake to soccer on those 4 Thursdays he had to work. She said she would see, but she was pretty sure she could.
On WEDNESDAY, she tells us she can't take Jake to soccer because she has to go to volleyball. She signed up for this league ages ago, but has never gone and even said she didn't like it, but all of a sudden she HAS to go to volleyball that night. She called me and Jake and told me that she couldn't take Jake. Here was our convo:
Mom: I don't think I will be able to take Jake to soccer tonight.
Me: What the heck? Why not? You said you would.
Mom: I have to go to volleyball.
Me: (angry) When? What time?
Mom: I have to be there around 6.
Me: Well Jake's game starts at 5:30. Drop us off and I will stay there with him.
Mom: Megan, NO. I don't want to do that.
Me: What? Why not?
Mom: Because we might want to go out or something afterward.
Me: Mom, you HAVE to be kidding me.
Mom: Jake doesn't even like soccer.
Me: HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? Jake LOVES soccer.
Mom: Just have dad call me.
I hung up. She has never ONCE been to ANY of his sports games or anything. She wouldn't know if he liked soccer or not. She barely even asks him how is game was or if they won. She was making me SO angry. She ended up calling my dad and my dad said a few choice words ("You haven't been much support to him anyway...", "There you go, letting him down again..." etc.)
Sooo, she calls later this weekend, and tells my dad that she didn't even play volleyball.
EXCUSE ME? How can she do that? She didn't even PLAY. She just went to meet some of her friends. How irresponsible.
I was so mad, I didn't even want to talk to her, and I don't think my dad did either.
I've been living the past 6 years of my life without a mother. Even though she moved out only a year and a half ago, she has been gone longer than that. She has never participated in anything we have done. She misses most of my concerts, pep band performances, marching performances, my brothers soccer, football and baseball games, the list goes on. I've come to a point in my life where I DON'T CARE anymore. It's too hard to care for someone who doesn't care about you. She needs to start realizing that she is missing things that she won't be able to get back. She missed my concerts as first chair french horn in band. She missed all of my solos. She missed it all, and she won't be able to get any of it back. She needs to realize that. And even if she can't realize that she's missing out, she needs to realize that WE are missing out. I don't have memories of a mom who cheered me on at a concert. I don't remember her ever being proud of me. I don't know anything besides a mom who sits at home on her computer all night and watches life pass her by.
I am not taking pity on her anymore. She has no excuses for missing out on our lives.
I am not letting her rule my life and I'm not letting her attitude bring me down. I have decided that I have a bigger, better life to live, and I'm not going to sit and pity myself over the fact that I have a heartless mother. I want to live happily and not be so brought down and angry by my mothers actions. I'M DONE.
*gets off soapbox, puts it back*
You see, my dad got another job as a part-time bartender at this place he golfs at. He's real good friends with the owners and they needed help badly, so he offered to help out a few nights a month and ended up with another part-time job.
My brother has soccer games Tuesdays and Thursdays. My dad works every Thursday in August at the Legion (golf/workplace). He asked my mom at the beginning of the month when he got his work schedule if she would be able to take Jake to soccer on those 4 Thursdays he had to work. She said she would see, but she was pretty sure she could.
On WEDNESDAY, she tells us she can't take Jake to soccer because she has to go to volleyball. She signed up for this league ages ago, but has never gone and even said she didn't like it, but all of a sudden she HAS to go to volleyball that night. She called me and Jake and told me that she couldn't take Jake. Here was our convo:
Mom: I don't think I will be able to take Jake to soccer tonight.
Me: What the heck? Why not? You said you would.
Mom: I have to go to volleyball.
Me: (angry) When? What time?
Mom: I have to be there around 6.
Me: Well Jake's game starts at 5:30. Drop us off and I will stay there with him.
Mom: Megan, NO. I don't want to do that.
Me: What? Why not?
Mom: Because we might want to go out or something afterward.
Me: Mom, you HAVE to be kidding me.
Mom: Jake doesn't even like soccer.
Me: HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? Jake LOVES soccer.
Mom: Just have dad call me.
I hung up. She has never ONCE been to ANY of his sports games or anything. She wouldn't know if he liked soccer or not. She barely even asks him how is game was or if they won. She was making me SO angry. She ended up calling my dad and my dad said a few choice words ("You haven't been much support to him anyway...", "There you go, letting him down again..." etc.)
Sooo, she calls later this weekend, and tells my dad that she didn't even play volleyball.
EXCUSE ME? How can she do that? She didn't even PLAY. She just went to meet some of her friends. How irresponsible.
I was so mad, I didn't even want to talk to her, and I don't think my dad did either.
I've been living the past 6 years of my life without a mother. Even though she moved out only a year and a half ago, she has been gone longer than that. She has never participated in anything we have done. She misses most of my concerts, pep band performances, marching performances, my brothers soccer, football and baseball games, the list goes on. I've come to a point in my life where I DON'T CARE anymore. It's too hard to care for someone who doesn't care about you. She needs to start realizing that she is missing things that she won't be able to get back. She missed my concerts as first chair french horn in band. She missed all of my solos. She missed it all, and she won't be able to get any of it back. She needs to realize that. And even if she can't realize that she's missing out, she needs to realize that WE are missing out. I don't have memories of a mom who cheered me on at a concert. I don't remember her ever being proud of me. I don't know anything besides a mom who sits at home on her computer all night and watches life pass her by.
I am not taking pity on her anymore. She has no excuses for missing out on our lives.
I am not letting her rule my life and I'm not letting her attitude bring me down. I have decided that I have a bigger, better life to live, and I'm not going to sit and pity myself over the fact that I have a heartless mother. I want to live happily and not be so brought down and angry by my mothers actions. I'M DONE.
*gets off soapbox, puts it back*