My situation these days...

[Kirsten]

I know, this isn't cat-related, but I thought I'd post this here since this is where I'm usually posting, and where I know most people...

First of all, let me say that I haven't forgot about you all, and this forum. I feel bad for not coming here and staying in touch, but it's a difficult time for me.

As you may know, I've got a new job. I'm still happy about it, and I like my work. But I always had to work a lot, right from the start; and now last week, my co-worker Silke was fired, and now I have to work even more. Apart from my job (input of the photos and data from traffic speed traps) I now also have the complete office management, have to do all the phone calls and deal with our customers, and sometimes have to develope the films also. It's also my job to advise and train our customers to use the new data type we deliver now, something our programmer and I have worked very hard on the last couple of months.

It's a lot of responsibility and hard work, but it's stressful also. The worst thing is that instead of Silke, who was a pleasure to work with, I now have a stupid intern to "support" *coughcough* me, and other temporary personnel, which in fact are more extra work for me instead of being a support.

I don't know if it comes from this entire stressful situation, but I feel very ill and burned out for many weeks now. It started in February when I felt like getting the flu, but it never really broke out, while everyone else around me was sick. It was the same time that I got problems with high blood pressure again, and I'm so exhausted and tired that there are no words to decribe it. I somehow make it through my working days - and that's it. At the weekends, I just don't have the energy to do anything; I can hardly keep my eyes open, and even typing this required all my strength.

Could be that my thyroid gland is acting up again (I'm hypothyriod); that would at least explain my poor state. I've gained a lot of weigth also. But Im also feeling depressed, and I feel like the loneliest person in the world. I completely lost touch with my online friends, and with my real life friends anyway. Lost them all to their spouses and kids. They don't need me anymore, and none of them has called me for many many months. My private life doesn't exist anymore; all I have is my job, the rest is utter isolation - and I don't have the energy to do something about it.

I'm sorry for venting here, but I thought I'd better give an explanation why I'm barely around.

Kirsten

[moosmom]

Kirsten,

It certainly sounds like you're burning out. If it's not your thyroid, I'd have the doctor check for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. That's what some of your symptoms sound like.

Are you getting enough sleep (at least 8 hours) at night?? Eating right??

I know how you feel about the *cough cough* intern. In the time it would take to show him what to do, it's quicker to do it yourself. Anyway you can sit down with supervisor and talk to him/her about the situation. Maybe he/she can come up with some kind of solution. You won't be any good to anyone if you're sick.

Don't ever apologize for venting here. That's what this board is all about. And that's what friends are for!!

Please take care of yourself, okay???

((((((HUGS))))))))))
Donna

[catmandu]

Kirsten,any time,that you want,to set up a chat,please let me know,as I have had that problem,of having people,that were supposed to help me,but didnt give a damn.And then,you have all,the responsibility,but not the authority.And We ,are your friends,and Lily,and Lunas,too and we miss seeing you,On Pet Talk.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v621/catmandu/catphotos549.jpg

[lbaker]

Kirsten, when you are here we are here. When you are not here we still are all around you and standing with you. We all have moments of panic or unease but that's when you can use us. Use our strength for YOU. "..that thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down". Let us help you stand tall with a smile on your face. Such a pretty face :)

[catcrazylady]

Kirsten it is so nice to hear from you again. We understand how busy you have been but friends are friends always.

I'm sorry to hear you are not feeling well. It sure does sound like you are under a lot of stress and stress can hurt our bodies just like being ill. I think you should go see a doctor to rule out anything physical and then deal with whatever comes after that.
Can you take any vacation to get some rest and let those gorgeous little nurses make you feel better? It sure sounds like you have an awful lot on your plate. Is there anything you can let go?

We are always here for one of our sweetest PT'ers so don't ever apologize for coming here and venting. We care a great deal about you and want to help in any way we can.

{{{HUGS}}}

[auggie]

Kirsten, I could have written this myself.
Job related stress and worries keeping me mentally and physically exhausted.
I feel like I live to work instead of work to live. I’m not sleeping well and feel too tired to do anything.
I wouldn’t hurt to have your Thyroid checked but keep in mind that stress can make you gain weight and feel the way you do. The best way to reduce stress is exercise and weight training it reduces the levels of Cortisol a stress hormone. I realize that because of your back there are some things that you can’t do. Germany is so beautiful in spring; maybe you can find an exercise buddy and go for long walks.
Stick around and I hope that you get to feeling better.

[catnapper]

I was just thinking of you and the girls this morning. Sounds like a very stressful time right now - do they have plans on replacing your coworker?

You could have mononucleosis (not sure if thats the word they use in Germany, but its a variance of the Epstein-Barr Virus) my daughter had it this winter and she had the same symptoms. Are your glands swollen? If so, please go to the doctor to get tested for Mono.


{{{HUGS}}} I hope you feel better soon

Sitr back and rest and take care of yoursef - let those lovely girls play nurse. :)

[catmandu]

The Found Cats, MMMEEEEEOOOWS For YOU,Kirsten..


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v621/catmandu/catphotos161.jpg

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

Like some others here say, do NEVER apologize for venting on PT! We are one big bunch of friends here, and we care for each other in good and bad days:) http://users.pandora.be/bernardgabriels/images/smilies%20958%20grouphug.gif
Try to talk to your boss, Kirsten. This cannot go on like this. In the end you will have to quit, so he won't be happy with that too :( . It could be CFS (Chronique Fatigue Syndrome) yes, or what we call here "Glands Fever" (I don't know correct name); but I understand that your problems are caused by all the stress you are under. Trying to relax is most important now! A long nature walk sounds super!
Kirsten do you have the possibility to take some time off? A few days away from work would do wonders for you! In fact, if you are interested, you are most welcome at my place!! We don't live that far apart, and you have a good airport nearby ;) . We are not here next week, but you are welcome any other period!
Take care, okay!! Thanks for telling this story, I was wondering where you were for quite some time already!

[sirrahbed]

Oh dear ((((KIRSTEN)))) - I am also happy to hear from you even though your news is not the happiest right now - but yes we are your friends and family so you are right to post to us!!

Sorry to hear about the job stress and the *cough cough* intern:rolleyes: I also have thyroid disease and that could well be one of the things making you feel bad.

Worst of all, in my opinion - is the loss of contact and friends. I understand that - many of us do! Also the loneliness that follows. I feel that way, too. Unfortunately, I even stay away from HERE sometimes when I feel I can't post happy things. Please get yourself rested and healthy OK?? WE miss you and your girls but mostly want you healthy!!

More (((HUGS)))) - we love you Kirsten.

[Corinna]

Hey I got a good releif for you check out Kay ann"s thread in dog general about being too tired. You will love it.
I know about temp help what a joke help my fanny. I start back on the 28th and I get to see how many of our seniors are returning. (snow birds)
Rest up and cuddle those lovely girls. put on a good movie and just tune out the world for the weekend.

[Barbara]

Kirsten, I am so sorry!
This sounds like more than just too much work. Namely like a thyroid problem and/or a depression. You definitely need to have your glands checked.

And get yourself to Pet Talk! We are here and there is always something going on:)

I think writing to us about it is like a first step. Take care of yourself. And kisses to the girls:)

[carole]

Kirsten I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling so unwell and totally burned out, gosh if only you lived closer, many of us would be around to see you and have a cuppa.

Kirsten we are all here for you anytime, always feel free to pm if you need, it is a possibility your thyroid is playing up, my mother has had both the underactive and over-active, and it sure played havoc with her well =being.

CFS, is something I understand, I donot have it, but a similar illness that gives me chronic fatigue, and sometimes it is just hard to even go on, so I can well relate to your feelings of exhaustion and depression, it is a vicious cycle unfortunately that comes with the symptons you are feeling.

The good part if you can call it that, is that you are very busy, so that could be all that is causing you to feel so tired, whereas I can simply feel that way and have no real cause, in other words I am not terribly busy and still feel exhausted., it really does sound like your work load is far too much.

Kirsten go have a general check-up so you can rule out the above , and if a holiday is possible, sounds like now would be an excellent time to take one.

If you can start to feel not so tired, then in general you will start feeling better about your life, and maybe beable to socialise more again and make new friendships or re-gain old ones, give those beautiful kitties a big cuddle and I also want to give you a big virtual HUG as well, please take care and come by more often if you can muster up the energy, please take care of yourself, thinking of you.:)

[krazyaboutkatz]

Kirsten, I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling poorly.:( I agree with the others in that you need to go to your doctor for a physical exam. I sure hope that you'll be able to start feeling better soon. Hopefully things will change for the better at work too so it will be less stressful. We're all here for you when you need us. Lots of prayers and positive thoughts are being sent your way. Please take care. {{{HUGS}}}

[catfamily]

Kirsten I hope things get better quick for you.It's a tough time but it can't stay like this forever.Get checked out and eventually it will change.Either they'll hire someone else or you might get lucky and find something else.Even though I know you like it where you are.But you can't do the work of more than1 person too long.I hope the best for you.Your a great friend for all of us and we want you feeling better.We love you here on Pettalk:D :D :D

[Kirsten]

Thanks everyone! Alone talking to you and reading your encouraging posts make me feel a bit better. But I'm sorry to hear that some of you, Carole and auggie, are feeling the same, and I hope you'll be doing much better soon!

It's evening here, so I'm very tired already, so please forgive me when I'm not replying to each suggestion or comment.

Some suggested to go on vacation, but I don't think I can do that before the fall. And as long as nobody can do what I'm doing, there's no chance of taking a few days off. I hope I can recover a bit at the long Easter weekend.

I think I definitely have to go to the doc and get my thyroid gland checked again. I will also ask about the possibility of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or Burnout Syndrome (but that's kind of embarassing; after all, I've been unemployed for one and a half year and it's only less than half a year ago that I started working again).

I don't think it's mononucleosis. I had the "gland fever" when I was 18, and as far as I know, you can only have this once in your life. Besides, I have no temperature. But maybe I still suffer from an underlying flu infection. After all, everyone around me was really sick during the last couple of weeks, and I'm feeling kind of ill, too. I had an ear infection in February, and a bit of bronchitis and sometimes a sore throat. But never bad enough to stay at home, and even if I wanted, I couldn't have called in sick because everything was depending on me, since at that time, we were still working on the new gateway. Now my bones and muscles are aching, so I think I still might have some flu virus inside my system, but it's not breaking out.

I'm eating lots of vitamines now, and I'm taking my "ferric meds". I also try to eat some healthier stuff now, but that's not easy: We always have candy and chocolate at work, and when it's stressful, I'm stuffing my face way too often... :o

Those who said I need to talk to my boss are right: it can't go on like this. Today, the intern and some more helpers were back at work, and it was impossible for me to do my own work, and I felt like everyone was tearing at me. Many days are like that, and it just can't work that way, at least not for good!

Anyway, I'm glad to have my PT friends here, and my furry little nurses at home! :)

Kirsten

[Logan]

Kirsten, I am so sorry you are not feeling well. We have missed you, Luna and Lily. Stress can do a lot of things to one's body, for sure, but you need to rule out any medical issues, first. I hope you will do that soon.

We love you and want you to be happy and feel good!!!! :)

Logan

[smokey the elder]

Please get your thyroid rechecked. I had those exact same symptoms 13 years ago and my thyroid was very underactive. The Dr. may need to up your replacement meds dose.

Hug your kitties! That makes great therapy.:)

p.s. (Please don't think all temps are useless. Some of us work as temps because permanent positions are very hard to come by.)

[NoahsMommy]

Oh Kirsten...I want to come over there and give you lots of hugs. (((Kirsten)))

I think a visit to your doctor would be a good thing. Just to check things out with your emotional and physical health. Maybe they can test your blood to see what's going on.

It sounds like your job is really, really stressful. But I know you're doing a very good job and you're a hard worker. People like you tend to have to do more because you care. But burnout is never good. I hope your support starts to be more supportive.

Just know that I'm here if you need to talk. I'm sorry your friends haven't called to check on you. Do know that I noticed you were missing, but have had a ton of health issues and have been a bit self-absorbed at the moment. :o

Please take care and let us know how you are. We miss you and your gorgeous girls.

Love and hugs,
Kelly :)

[jenluckenbach]

{{{{{{{KIRSTEN}}}}}}}

I am so sorry that things are so stressful that you need to cut back on activities you love (like pet talk). I hope things start looking better for you soon. feel free to pop off a quick email to me if you have a few spare moments eve if it is to just vent. You need to stay in touch with those that love you.

Take care.

[catmandu]

Kirsten,you know,that we are here for YOU,as we say here 24/7.As in the Blondie Song CALL ME!Found Cats Strays,and Angels,are MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWING FOR YOU,Kirsten ,und Der Liebchen Katzes Lily,and Luna.

[lbaker]

Wir liebe dich :cool:

Wir lieben sie? I can't remember :o But you know.

[Vio&Juni]

Sounds so familiar. Last year, I was working too much and when I was home in the evening, I couldn't even watch the tv. I'd suggest to pay a little more attention to your needs - take a five minute break every hour or two, drink a cup of green tea or whatever makes you happy. If you have a nice view from your office window, enjoy it, if not just go out to drink your cup of tea - away from work. Take your camera on weekend and go take pictures of spring flowers or birds.

And check if the lack of vitamins it's not the cause.

Well, that's what helped me.

[Barbara]

Originally posted by lbaker
Wir liebe dich :cool:

Wir lieben sie? I can't remember :o But you know.
Wir lieben dich!

If German Pet talkers meet in real life they would not use the formal Sie ;)

[lbaker]

ahhh, it's those subtleties that get me confuzzled ;) Thanks Barbara, and one day we WILL have a huge Euro PT Meeting. You can count on it :D

[Karen]

You need to remember, in all your busy time, to take care of YOU! Sorry you rare feeling poorly, a trip to the doc seems in order. And give Luna and Lily a good snuggle apiece from me, okay?

[catmandu]

We Love You Kirsten,the Found Cats,Strays,Rehomed Strays,and Angels,and of course,Our Feeder,are all praying,for YOU!

[gini]

Kirsten, I am so sorry to hear that you are not feeling well and that your job has become so stressful.

It seems that right at this time you are caught between a rock and a hard place.

The suggestion to take small five minute breaks......whether it be looking out a window........having a cup of tea......escaping to the ladies room............is a good one.

All of us are here for you and you are such a valuable part of Pet Talk that we will hound you if we don't hear regularly from you, that you are alright.

Going to the Dr. is also an excellent idea. And talking to your boss is another.

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Kirsten, so sorry to hear you're having such a rough time of it.

I have to echo all the others in having your thyroid checked. The depression, weight gain, always being tired, etc are classic symptoms of an underactive thyroid. I know because I went through the same thing. Now with meds, I feel sooo much better. I'm still tired all the time, but I think that's just stress and having too much to do and not enough time to do it.

Another thing that might help along with the vitamins and eating better is to get a little exercise. I take 10 minutes out of my day at work and do some stretches and some jumping jacks. Not only does it give me more energy, but it loosens up all those tight muscles in my shoulders from working on the computer too much. And a side benefit is that it helps keep your weight under control. And I'm not talking serious major exercises, but maybe just a walk around the block during lunch or something like that. The secret isnt' in how much exercise you do, but in how steady you do it.

I sure hope you're feeling better soon. We miss Luna and Lily - and you too of course! :)

And wow, I'm impressed with myself. I knew what Laurie was saying!!! :D

[lbaker]

Debbie, I'm impressed when anyone knows what I'm saying even when I write in English :p

[Lillycat]

kirsten.....just thinking on the mono.....if you have had that, i belive it is viral.....remaining in your body and it can return every now and then......might want to check on that also when you visit the doctor and i really think you need to visit the doctor as a "starting point" in all this.....good thoughts going out to you....take care

[slick]

Kirsten, forgive me for not replying until now. I was trying to find the right words. Stress can do major damage to the body and mind and it can manifest itself in other ways.

I've been where you are and I know how it feels. My job, for the most part, is very stressful and very busy, but I do manage to take little breaks now and then, mainly to check on Pet Talk. There was a time that I worked 10 hours a day and got home exhausted. Then, on the weekends I would have to squeeze in volunteer work, housework, taking Mom shopping, hospital visits, catsitting, etc. etc. This year, I finally said "self, enough is enough" so I cut way back on volunteering. I only do two events per year now and I'm happy with that. As well, I decided that I would try to free up more time for friends whom I have not seen in a long time. It's worked out well.

What I'm trying to say is that YOU are the most important thing you should be thinking about and you need to stay healthy, at whatever cost. Talk to your boss, your doctor, your friends and try to find balance in your life. Do it for YOU, do it for the kitties.

big {{{HUGS}}} to you Kirsten and please keep us posted.
love
slick xoxoxoxoxo

[Kirsten]

What can I say? I'm so glad to have you all! (((HUGS))) Makes me feel much better to read all your posts, and it's so sweet that you even write in German! :)

I'm already doing some of the things suggested here, like taking mini breaks by looking out of the window, or eating vitamines. And those who have suggested some exercises are so right, even though my lack of discipline in that regard still has the upper hand, but I know that I need to change that... ;)

It's encouraging to read that some of you have been through the same and found a way out of the misery.

Lillycat, that's a most interesting point about the mono. Yes, it's caused by a virus (Epstein-Barr as far as I know), but I didn't know it remains in the system and may act up from time to time. I will definitely ask my doctor about it! Thinking back, there were times in my life when I felt the same way (as I'm feeling now), but I never thought of the mononucleosis I had back in 1984!

Guess what? I talked to my boss today! The reason was that I had a conversation with the intern earlier this afternoon. She's thinking about prolonging her time with us, and she asked me what I'm thinking about that, and wanted to know if she's supporting me well. Well, I had no other choice but to reply honestly, so I told her if she wants to be a support, she has to work much quicker. She started using excuses that she's still a newbie (she started in early February), but I told her that when I started working for my old company (the one this one has splitted off from), I already had to train new co-workers after 5 or 6 weeks. The intern was teary-eyed in the end and I felt bad because maybe I was too harsh, but the fact is that everything I said is the truth.

Later I spoke to my boss on the phone about that incident, and about the entire situation also. He said we would have a meeting tomorrow, and that this was only a temporary solution, that he's in the process to find out how much staff we need. Well, I hope I didn't make a mistake by telling him all this, and that he doesn't think I'm not able to work under pressure.

Anyway, the funny thing is that I'm not <i>that</i> tired tonight, even though I lay awake from 4 am on, because I was thinking about the office situation all the time. I hope I'll sleep better tonight!

(((HUGS))) to you all and thank you so much for listening!!!

Kirsten