View Full Version : What age do you think is appropriate to tell a kid about Santa?
Tonya
12-19-2004, 11:45 AM
What age do you think is appropriate to tell a kid about Santa? How old were you?
Kfamr
12-19-2004, 11:51 AM
I don't remember how old I was so it was probably years and years ago.
Personally, i've always STILL liked "Santa" no matter if he's real or not, it's fun to pretend. But, I don't believe when/if I have children i'll tell them that Santa is "real", but something that's fun to play pretend.
slleipnir
12-19-2004, 11:53 AM
I was told before I started grade one. I didn't really care, so I was told. My mom said she wanted me to know so kids wouldn't say stuff in school about it. I guess my brother was really upset when he found out about it :rolleyes:
Laura's Babies
12-19-2004, 11:53 AM
I selected 12 or older but that is because by then, they have it figured out anyway. My kids had it figured out on their own but I forget what age they were. When one knows, they tell the rest so it happens at all ages. It is the "fun" of it all that is important and as long as it can be drug out, the better... In my opinion...
christa
12-19-2004, 11:59 AM
I know you all will think this is lame, but I NEVER believed in Santa! My parents just never told me either way, whether he was real or not. I knew my presents came from my parents & that is that.
I don't feel as though I missed out on anything. I LOVE Christmas still . . . it's my absolute favorite holiday! I love the whole spirit of the season, the music, the way it brings families together . . . and I love giving!
The only damage that this did to me . . . well, I'm 23 years old right now and to this day, I am scared of the mall Santas!!! I guess I always knew that they were just strange men dressed up in a costume . . . so I never ever wanted to sit on their laps. I still find myself taking the long way through the mall just to avoid passing them . . . just in case he tries to hug me or something.
Same thing with the Easter Bunny. Last Easter, I was walking through the mall and the Easter Bunny was walking around hugging little kids . . . I actually started panicking & thinking about an escape plan! Then I realized what I was doing and cracked up! I called my mom right away & told her!
If your kid does "believe", I think it's all up to their personality when you should tell him/her. Kids are all different . . . but once they get into school, SOMEONE is gonna break it to them . . . so I'd definitely do it before then!
Samantha Puppy
12-19-2004, 12:03 PM
I was in 5th grade when I asked my parents if he was real or not. We were at dinner and I said, "I have a very important question to ask and you have to be honest. I need to know if Santa is real so I know if have to stay up late and spend my own money getting my kids toys or if I can take it easy and sleep all night."
After my parents laughter died down, they told me that he wasn't really a real person but that it was the spirit of Santa Claus that was important that is what should always be remembered and passed through the generations.
I plan on allowing my kids as many years of magical Christmases as possible.
Amber
12-19-2004, 12:23 PM
I was about 6 when my brother told me he wasn't real. I really didn't care either way, lol as long as presents still came. :p
Tollers-n-Dobes
12-19-2004, 01:11 PM
I was never told. I figured it out when I was about 10 or so by myself.
Cincy'sMom
12-19-2004, 01:21 PM
I don't know at what age I figured it out. Proabally fairly young, cause I liked to snoop!
We were disussing Santa at work on Friday. My one friend and his wife just had a their first baby in early November. He does not want to ever tell her Santa is real. We were all telling him he couldn't do that...it would ruin it for all his daughter's friends too.
Another person said there parents told them from the beginning Santa wasn't real...they didn't believe their parents until they were ready and other kids were starting to figure it out.
One other friend said he and his wife are taking a little different approach this year...they are giving their kids (11, 7, and 2) one present from Santa. All the rest will be from "mommy and daddy". He feels they work too hard to let some "fat guy in a red suit" take all the credit. Knowing he works with us full time, is taking a full load of college classes ( in engineering), coach's his son's wrestling team,and baby #4 is on the way...I sure can't agrue with his feelings!! Even without all that, I think parents deserve more credit then they deserve...at Christmas time and all year!!
popcornbird
12-19-2004, 02:19 PM
This thread made me laugh...because it brought back certain memories from 2nd grade. While I'm not Christian and never celebrated Christmas, I still grew up in the US, and during holiday season, 'Santa' was all around me...in the malls, stores, school, neighborhood,...EVERYWHERE.
I remember back when I was in 2nd grade, our teacher gave us a piece of paper and an envelope. We were supposed to write our own personal letters to 'Santa', and she told us Santa would reply to our letters when he got time. Now I had never believed Santa was real, and here I was being told to write 'Santa' a letter. I knew in my heart that the letter was going to no Santa...and that whoever would respond was not Santa at all, sooooooo..........I ended up writing a letter to Santa, saying I didn't believe he existed, and that the kids all get Christmas presents from their parents...not him. I don't know why I wrote that, but being a kid, I thought it would be funny to write something 'different'. After all, the teacher DID tell us to write whatever we wanted to...just that it had to be a secret from the other students. Basically, I told 'Santa' that he was a 'myth' and that I knew he wasn't coming to give me any presents cause he never did!!! I mean...my family never celebrated Christmas, so I never got presents on that day. When I saw stuff about Santa bringing presents to all children, and he never had presents for me, I knew he really didn't exist. I wrote the letter in the most polite way, put it in the envelope, and handed it to my teacher.
1 week later, I got a reply. I was young....just 7, but I still remember his words. He said, "Not all children believe in Santa, and they just might be right, but it is a joy to believe in Santa and get all those goodies on Christmas day, thinking it is all true. I hope you will learn to enjoy Santa while you are still a child. Remember, Santa loves you!"
LOL! I *bet* it was my teacher who wrote that response. I couldn't stop laughing. It was hilarious. :p
Anyway, with all that being said, while Santa might be 'fun'...I don't think children should ever be lied to. I personally believe they should be told the truth from the beginning. They are going to know eventually, and then they will think, "Why were our parents lying to us?" Maybe it should be introduced to children as a 'fun' tradition, and not something that's reality (which it is not) instead?
catnapper
12-19-2004, 02:23 PM
I was in second grade... and I figured it out on my own. Santa used a blue pen on his name tags that looked an awful lot like the blue pen my mom used! Even back then I was highly aware of colors and the different line qualities you'd get from different pens :D I asked my mom, and she had to fess up based on the "evidence" - but she told me not to tell my brother... who figured it out on his own about the same time because he lost a tooth, and caught mom leaving money under his pillow. He reasoned that if the tooth fairy was fake, then so was Santa. No pulling the wool over our eyes!
chocolatepuppy
12-19-2004, 02:38 PM
What? Santa isn't real? :confused:
lynnestankard
12-19-2004, 02:43 PM
Originally posted by chocolatepuppy
What? Santa isn't real? :confused:
Of course he is!!!!
Lynne
Karen
12-19-2004, 02:46 PM
Of course Santa is real. He's as real as kindness, and real as the joy of making someone happy, and as beautiful as the wonder in a child's eyes when he sees the Christmas lights and hears bells that reindeer might have on their harnesses ...
I don't remember how old I was, but I suspected pretty early, and played along so my younger brother could "believe" a bit longer. My parents never told me either way, my older siblings told me about Santa!
LKPike
12-19-2004, 04:28 PM
eh, personally I don't want to work extra hours just so some fat jolly man can get all the credit for those gifts! But I love the excitement and joy my neice and younger cousins get on Christmas day, they still believe in him :) From my understanding it was a REAL man a long long time ago, as long as his spirit and kindness still lives on, then he still exists :)
Corinna
12-19-2004, 04:41 PM
CP you took my responds .He is real how else will I get my 25th annaversery diamond(hubby won't remember. )
Tonya
12-19-2004, 05:41 PM
If it weren't for my son's friends, I would have never made him believe in Santa. The only reason why I went along with the whole thing is because I'd hate for Jaden to ruin it for other kids.
We never did the Easter bunny thing or any of those other things though. Just Santa. I'd rather him recognize Christmas as Jesus' birthday and Easter as the day he rose then the day of the bunny and the fat guy in the red suit.
As a child, we always got tons of presents from Santa. One year, my parents had hard times financially and we didn't get much. I was so traumatized. I thought that we must have been horrible or something.
Because of that, Jaden gets a stocking, and a couple of inexpensive gifts from Santa. All the big expensive stuff comes from mom and dad. That way, if we had hard times financially, we can explain it...not have him thinking that Santa doesn't like him or whatever.
I found out from my first grade teacher. She was Jehovah Witness and took it upon herself to tell the whole class. I think she got fired or suspended for it. I don't remembber for sure, but I remember parents being really mad.
sweet_stormy
12-19-2004, 06:04 PM
i was about 9 or 10 when i was told that he wasnt real... it was tough for me in grade school when it came to x-mas... just to pretend to believe in santa is hard to do when your little....
~*Becky*~
rizzy
12-19-2004, 07:41 PM
I found out I think when I was 10. I heard it from someone else and asked my mom if it was true. She told me the truth and I cried. I selected 10-11 but I think 9-10 you should tell them. I think its better to hear from your parents then someone from school or something. I also think they should know around when most people would find out. Depends on with different kids though I think. For some reason I think I would tell a boy earlier then I would tell a girl...
teenster3
12-19-2004, 07:49 PM
SANTA ISN'T REAL?;)
cookieluver7
12-19-2004, 08:50 PM
I say around ages 7-8. I voted 6-7 but I think that is a little young. I was told when I was 7. I think the appropriate time to tell kids about Santa is whenever you, as the parent, think is the right time. (FYI, I wouldn't tell kids under 5, and I wouldnt wait till 12 and over to tell them either.)
I voted 8-9. I think Santa should be discussed with kids by parents before being discovered some other way. I know 2 girls that are 11 and they're mother is sure they don't believe, but wants to leave it at that. I believe it would be good for a parent to sit and discuss and let the child ask questions. My Mom told me and I understood I was upset, but took it well. I would have hated to just have found it out myself and my parents to just assume I knew and not talked to me about it. This mother I know says she thinks the girls won't say anything because if they don't believe they won't get any presents. I think thats terrible. I personally would want to discuss it with my child. It also gives them reason to come to the parents if they have other questions knowing they can ask questions and be told the answer truthfully.
NoahsMommy
12-19-2004, 10:55 PM
I didn't vote because I don't think kids need to be told. I wasn't, and at 26 I still get a stocking from Santa at my parents house and presents under the tree.
Whenever I say, "Thanks, mom!" after opening a "santa" gift, my mom will still say, "its from Santa, not me." I love it, its makes Christmas fun and different.
My husband was raised with the Three Wise Men instead of Santa. Even then, he knew that was his parents. He wont ever understand the sense of wonderment and the imagination of the spirit of Santa Clause, and that's sad.
I found out at around 9 or 10, when I heard my dad come over late one night. My parents were divorced already, so I knew something was up.
I love Santa! :)
petslover
12-19-2004, 11:45 PM
I agree with Kelly's response.
My parents still do the its from Santa routine even though they know I know. It is just the fun of it to me!
jiena_drakon
12-20-2004, 12:00 AM
you can tell a child at any age who/about santa...
I'm not sure if you are firmilier with santa it doesn't sound like you are
Santa is a real person.. santa is a term we use that I guess you could say means a gift that comes from the heart of one who loves you and thinks you deserve recognition for the wonders they have done over the past year.. that is santa I am santa you are santa santa is an act within us all and we make that act into a human we portray as santa or st nick himself..
never loose the faith always belive in santa/the giveing and love in others
btw I'm 23 years old .. and my 63 year old grandma told me this many many years ago and she taught me about the background and history of this word.
luckies4me
12-20-2004, 12:12 AM
We decided early on that there would be no "Santa" in our home. Dylan knows he gets gifts from family and friends, not some imaginary person. Though the whole idea might seem nice to some, I think it's utterly ridiculous to lie to your child in such a way. Christmas is a time for families, not presents.
Tonya
12-20-2004, 12:29 AM
Originally posted by jiena_drakon
you can tell a child at any age who/about santa...
I'm not sure if you are firmilier with santa it doesn't sound like you are
Santa is a real person.. santa is a term we use that I guess you could say means a gift that comes from the heart of one who loves you and thinks you deserve recognition for the wonders they have done over the past year.. that is santa I am santa you are santa santa is an act within us all and we make that act into a human we portray as santa or st nick himself..
never loose the faith always belive in santa/the giveing and love in others
btw I'm 23 years old .. and my 63 year old grandma told me this many many years ago and she taught me about the background and history of this word.
I understand the history/story of Santa. But I do not believe that is what Christmas is about. Christmas is the celebration of Jesus birth. The whole santa thing has gotten out of hand to me.
Maya & Inka's mommy
12-20-2004, 05:46 AM
First this: here, we don't really have "Santa". It is ST.Nicolas who brings toys to the kids, at December 6th
Here is the interesting info:
http://www-astro.physics.ox.ac.uk/~erik/sint/sint.html#explanation
I found out at age 10 that it was not true. I was VERY mad, and yelled "so, doesn't God exist too then???". My parents reasured me that it was just St.Nicolas who was fake . Phew!!!
I think kids should be told whenever they ask for it, at least before they are 8. It is sad when they find out to soon too.
My son also was told by his teacher when he was only 7. Oh my, I was mad too then!!
sirrahbed
12-20-2004, 06:17 AM
We never did "santa" at our house at all. It was just never an option. Christmas is a spiritual season with lots of symbols and santa is just one (secular) of them but the kids have always known he was pretend. I doubt if they ever felt the need to break the NEWS to anyone at school because it was no big deal. Should someone ask "what is santa bringing you?" - they would just know it means "what are you hoping to receive for Christmas?" or that sort of thing.
I don't know why, but we DID have a "tooth fairy":p I assumed that was another thing the kids knew was pretend as well but one of my kids recently told me they found one of their teeth in my jewlry box at one time and felt betrayed!!:o I always tryed to the max to be very honest and yet still play pretend and encourage the kids to use their imaginations - it is a very difficult balance!!! I did NOT want to be like the mom on "Miracle on 34th Street":D THAT movie made a big impact on me!!!
lizzielou742
12-20-2004, 08:40 AM
I figured it out when I was about 10. I noticed Santa's handwriting on the gift tags looked exactly like my dad's! My dad has very distinctive handwriting. I think he may have been disguising his handwriting up until that year, and maybe decided it was time to let me figure it out. ;)
Buddy Blaze Lover
12-20-2004, 09:45 AM
Originally posted by lizzielou742
I figured it out when I was about 10. I noticed Santa's handwriting on the gift tags looked exactly like my dad's! My dad has very distinctive handwriting. I think he may have been disguising his handwriting up until that year, and maybe decided it was time to let me figure it out. ;)
lol, I figured that out when I was 5 or 6...oh gosh, it was funny, 'cause I was like, "Hmmm...Santa and mom both have the same handwriting AND wrapping paper!!":D
jiena_drakon
12-20-2004, 03:43 PM
well like you said you wanted to tell the kid the truth about santa and that is what santa is..
as for christmas is the celebration of jesus's berth you are right but just because jesus was born that day doesn't mean you can not celebrate other things like santa or your child's bday if they happened to be born that day too.. every day has many things to celebrate and it didn't get out of hand .. the truth of everything just got lost
CamCamPup33
12-20-2004, 08:00 PM
I was around 11 or so.. I think that's a pretty good age though to tell some children.
It all happened when i was in North Carolina for Christmas with my cousin's family. I was helping out his grandmother (Who isn't my grandma by the way) with cookies, and she said SO nonchalantly, "Oh goodness, I'm going to have a HARD time hauling out all of those presents for DJ.. DJ still believes in Santa, so i need to do it how he thinks Santa would do it."
I was literally traumatized. She must have thought I already knew, but I really didn't. Like others have said, I think the "Idea" of Santa is really fun, whether or he's real or not. It's still fun to put out milk and cookies, when you really know your parents are going to be downstairs stuffing their faces with cookies. ;)
My mom *ALWAYS* assures me he is real, she claims she still believes too... :p .. I'll say something like "Thanks for the present, it was really nice," and she'll say "It wasn't from me, it was from Santa... Didn't you read the card?"
So i think that's a pretty good age to tell your children. But thats my opinion.
CalliesMom
12-20-2004, 08:07 PM
I was seven when my brother told me there was no Santa. He was 14 so I'm sure it gave him great pleasure to break my heart! LOL I went crying to my dad and asked him to tell me the truth, which devastated me even more. I should have been grateful that my parents loved me enough to go out of their way to make our Christmas' so special...but I preferred the idea of some wierdo coming down our chimney, eating my cookies.... :rolleyes:
flamepony12
12-20-2004, 09:06 PM
I was 10 when I found out. But I still LOVE to believe in Santa, even tho I know he's not real! :D ;) [I hafta keep it a secret anyway, since I have a 4 y-o brother! :D]
Logan
12-20-2004, 10:09 PM
Tonya, I didn't vote because I truly don't know. I also haven't read any of the responses, so I may be repeating someone else's answer. But, I think you just know when it is time to tell the truth. Usually, the child will ask, either because they "heard" it from someone else, or they just get wise and can't figure out how it can all happen (sort of like the tooth fairy). I always reminded my daughter that you have to believe for it to happen, regardless of "how" it happens, so in reality, she has never heard from me that there is no Santa Claus, and rightfully so, because for her there is always a Santa Claus, regardless of who lays out the gifts.
Good luck!
Logan
Twisterdog
12-21-2004, 12:02 AM
I think most kids learn about "Santa" when they go to grade school. The older kids in school always tell the little ones.
Personally, I never told my son there was no Santa Claus. I just waited until he commented.
buckner
12-21-2004, 12:21 AM
I honestly didn't know how to vote. I believe I voted with the 8-9 category. If I recall, I was told by my older brother when I was younger, but I didn't think anything of it. Later, I found out for real that Santa didn't physically exist. Spiritually - yes, and boy, if I say any different, I get nothing but coal! Really!
One night I had lost a tooth and was putting it under my pillow when my dad was tucking me in, and I said "Can't you just give me my money now?" And he said "What do you mean?" I said "Come on dad, I know it's you who comes in here and takes my teeth and gives me money, so cough it up." He answered "Watch out, the tooth fairy might hear that and you won't get ANYTHING!" Sure enough, I woke up the next morning, NOTHING! No tooth, no money. Nothing. :(
And around here, we still do the Santa thing. I'm 16 and my brother's 19. :p We know it's not Santa putting the gifts down there, but it's just what we've always done. My parents, when we were little, put Santa's gifts in front of the fireplace and wrapped the ones from them. When we found out, they started just putting everything in front of the fireplace unwrapped. It helps, a lot. Ryan and I get up at 5am to go downstairs to see what we got, and it's so much easier to just dive in, than have to wait until everyone's actually *awake* to open gifts. Then once everything's looked at, we go back to sleep and then wake up, and open other gifts for eachother. And yes, I still do expect that stocking full of chocolate. It couldn't happen any other way. So I just suggest, at whatever age you decide to tell Jaden, don't stop the Santa thing. Let him know he's not real, but keep the spirit alive by making it seem like he stills comes. :)
And a funny story about milk and cookies. We had not done this is SO long.. in fact, I don't recall ever leaving cookies and milk out for Santa, but my memory's very bad. Well, one year, probably in 2000, we decided to leave some out for Santa. Silly me, I left them on the fireplace stone.. only about 6 inches high off the ground. I went upstairs, leaving the DOG downstairs. O.D. was our previous dog, and boy.. she had a feast. My mom came down the stairs and started laughing hysterically and fell over. We all ran down the stairs to see what was wrong... the dog had finished the cookies (oreos!) and started to slurp up the milk. Goofy dog.
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