PDA

View Full Version : Buttered Cat Theorey



scottso55
12-03-2001, 12:01 PM
I thought everyone would enjoy this excerpt from Omni magazine:

When a cat is dropped, it ALWAYS lands on its feet. When toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down. Therefore, I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat. When dropped, the two hover, spinning inches above the ground, probably into eternity. A buttered cat array could replace pneumatic tires on cars and trucks, and a giant buttered cat array could easily allow a high speed monorais to run between New York and Chicago.

This was the grand prize winner in a contest for new scientific theories sponsored by Omni magazine. :)

tuxluvr
12-03-2001, 12:23 PM
Cat Man Doo...(great screen name, by the way)...this is the funniest thing I've read in a long time! Thanks for making my morning!

purrley
12-03-2001, 01:09 PM
:D :D THATS A HOOT - Welcome to Pet Talk Cat Man Doo - you'll have a lot of fun here :)

zippy-kat
12-03-2001, 01:57 PM
:D :D :D
How funny!

Welcome Cat Man Doo!

scottso55
12-03-2001, 10:34 PM
Originally posted by tuxluvr:
<STRONG>Cat Man Doo...(great screen name, by the way)...this is the funniest thing I've read in a long time! Thanks for making my morning!</STRONG>

Thanks !!!! I didn't come up with this -- I wish I could say I did !!!

P S -- Cat of The Day is GREAT !!!!!

thelmalu99
12-04-2001, 12:29 PM
http://bbs2.fanforum.com/images/smilies/LOL.gif

NoahsMommy
12-04-2001, 06:42 PM
Totally cute!! :)

BigCharles
12-05-2001, 02:01 PM
Originally posted by Cat Man Doo:
<STRONG>&lt;snip&gt;... When dropped, the two hover, spinning inches above the ground, probably into eternity. &lt;snip&gt;
</STRONG>


There is a problem, however, with spinning cats. Take the "kitten on a turntable" experiment when entering phase three, for example.

Phase One is 33 1/3 RPM
Phase Two is 45
Phase Three is 78 :eek:

Cats spun around any axis for any duration tend to begin reverse digestive tract weight reduction procedures, usually in projectile mode. It has been demonstrated that cats can "throw up" multiple times their own body weight in a single session.

This action does, however, eventually reduce the mass of the cat. Small cats can't turn toward the ground with the same force as a non-diminished cat. Taken over the long term, the toast will win out.

You wind up with buttered toast on the ground and a feet up, thin, cat.

Now two cats duct taped back-to-back, even if they are not of the same weight, can achieve remarkable results.


================================
================================
Please note that the above is intended to be and exercise in humor. I would never do that to my cats.

[ December 05, 2001: Message edited by: BigCharles ]