View Full Version : Love Is Not Evil

02-11-2004, 01:23 PM
Yes, this is a direct response to the thread called L.I.E.s? (http://PetoftheDay.com/talk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=43211) I was away when that thread came into being, but just couldn't let it sit unanswered.

Love is not evil. Not in the least bit.

The overcommercialization of it may be. The setting of material expectations connected somehow with the emotion, and tied to a particular day may be thought evil, but I think that's giving it too much credit. That's just marketing, you don't have to buy into every idea you are presented with.

Love is grand. Love is what brings us here. Love is indescribably special. It is stronger than pain, than pettiness, and stronger too than death.

Love is Not Evil.

Valentine's Day is an opportunity.

If you want to feel sad, and left out, go ahead, but realiza it is your CHOICE. If you want to "protest" by wearing all black, go ahead, no one will notice, as most people of my generation and younger wear all black a lot of the time anyway. No big deal.

Valentine's Day is an opportunity. If you are happily single-by-choice, great! Don't let the commercials get you down! Take yourself, or another person out to dinner to celebrate your love of being single!

If you are unhappily single, and the thought of the day depresses you, be proactive. If nothing else, buy some candy or flowers for someone just to see their surprised look. It could be an elderly neighbor, the bus driver, the cashier at the grocery store, just someone who may be ignored by others on this day that seems focused more and more on youth and romance. It could be for a friend you know is having a tough time with the day. Doing something is so much more fun than pouting!

No money? Make valentines by hand - people will appreciate them even if the heart is lopsided, I promise.

Rejoice! You are alive. Love exists in the world. You know the unconditional love of your pet(s), right? Some folks have never experienced that, some never will. Aren't you better off, richer for this love?

Love exists. It is grand! It is a gift we give to others, and in giving receive back! (Remember the Magic Penny song?)

Now I'm gonna "get Biblical" on you:
From 1st Corinthians, Chapter 13, RSV:

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.

So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.


So there!

02-11-2004, 01:28 PM
Originally posted by Karen
Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right.

Ah, one of my favorite quotes. :D

02-11-2004, 01:30 PM
I agree that anything is what you make of it!

I never minded Valentine's as a single person, but then I was just as content to be single and didn't need anyone to make me happy, but myself. I'm still a person who requires a lot of "me" time, and fortunately so is my husband.

I LOVE the idea to give a Valentine to an elderly person, I think I will even go so far as to purchase some cute kids Valentine's for the elderly at our nursing home here in town!

What a great insperation this thread has been!

Thanks Karen!! :D :D :D

02-11-2004, 01:32 PM
And if you have any type of critter love in your life, you really, deep down, know it's not evil. Hug your pets. Buy them a valentine, or a treat.

Get over your self and think of others. What can you do to make someone else's life a little better or happier? I paint flowers on smalll glass marbles and surprise people with them. You should see the smiles!!!! I get over 40 smiles to a bag!:D

02-11-2004, 01:40 PM
I agree with Karen.. love is NOT evil :D

we must say not L.I.E. but L.I.N.E :D

02-11-2004, 01:44 PM
Thank you, Karen, for a beautiful and inspiring post.

02-11-2004, 01:49 PM
Evil spelled backwards is Live. So live to love. Very good and wonderful post Karen.

02-11-2004, 01:58 PM
One thing that really upsets me about 'special'
holidays is the fact that we all get into the spirit of things, just for the moment.

I worked with a doctor who would always use the term, 'BAH, HUMBUG' all year round. He was a nasty jerk who took pleasure in making women upset and making them cry.

Around the Xmas holidays he would send a huge jar of candy for our department...with a nice card attached.....

That was about 17 years ago...and to this day it makes me cringe when I see people that get into the spirit of a holiday one day, and spend the next 364 being jerks, miserable or just plain nasty..

Valentine's Day isn't just February 14th.

It's October 3rd, July 17th or August 9th.

It isn't a Hallmark card, a DeBeers diamond, or a fancy dinner at a restaurant you can't afford.

Valentine's day is making dinner for your sweetie,
a phone call when they do not expect it or doing some little chore for them.

It's seeing their side of the arguement, taking a day off of work to baby sit them when they get sick or just spending a quiet day sitting around and enjoying each other's company.

On Feb 15th go to the "seasonal" section of the store and look at all the discount candy that is on sale.

It hasn't lost any of it sweetness, but by the time October comes around, it may not be that tasty.....

I tend to bypass Feb 14th as a holiday-It's far more fun and rewarding to celebrate love 364 days a year.

02-11-2004, 02:00 PM
Boy I needed that today! Thanks Karen...very inspirational and makes one put things into the proper perspective. Generally speaking, people who are unhappy are CHOOSING to be so....and sometimes, I fall into that category and it takes people like you Karen to make me pull out of it.

Thanks!! Happy Valentine's Day everyone.

02-11-2004, 02:06 PM
http://cmw.dailymoviereviews.com/contrib/ruinkai/biggthumpup.gif http://cmw.dailymoviereviews.com/otn/love/luxlove.gif

02-11-2004, 02:09 PM
I couldn't agree with you more, Karen.

I was saddened by the other thread, that so many people find love to be an evil thing.

I love the idea of making valentine's for the elderly, or anyone who needs it. In a perfect world, we would all be sending cards to nursing homes, and doing all of those things every day, but it isn't a perfect world, unfortunately, so we should take this one tiny day of the year, and turn it into something special.

Yes, Valentines Day has been commercialized, but the bottom line is that it is a day to celebrate love, whether that be with our spouses, significant others, parents, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins, children, pets, friends, neighbors, or anyone. Love isn't just for people in relationships, it's for everyone, in one way or another.
I find it hard to believe that someone can protest this day that much--celebrate it with someone you love!!!

As for your biblical quote Karen--we had that read at our wedding--I love it, and thanks for sharing it.

02-11-2004, 03:26 PM
Like I said in the orginal post, I only think that high school "love" (the annoying kind that everyone with a boyfriend or girlfriend shoves in your face) is evil. And not even to be taken literally. I took part in it and joined in, as it being a joke. I never thought someone would ask about it as I certainly don't stand by it in that way.

Love isn't evil. I love my family and my friends and my pets. But when you're alone on Valentine's Day for 16 years in a row (like I expected a Valentine for 10 of those years anyway :p) I can't help but resent the holiday. And that's a mistake on my part but I'm young and immature and until I find true love, I'll probably always resent this day. As long as I'm hurting no one in the process, all should be good.

I'm sorry if anyone took offense to it. It was a little joke that started between a few of us and others got involved. One of those msn chat things, not meant to be taken seriously.

I don't know what else I can say. Happy Valentine's Day...;)

02-11-2004, 03:42 PM
You are right! I can't imagine life without my husband and kids! People wonder how on Earth I could have married someone so far from my home, who was a single father of three teenagers. Simple. I fell in love with him AND his his kids!

God knew what he was doing when he showed me the way to Grant. He is a little older than I am, but my perfect match. He has three great kids who are now mine too. Their mother is not around and I am now their mom... nobody would argue that (especially not the kids) I have come to realize that I am not meant to have had a baby or child of my own... these kids are my answer to a prayer from long ago. I am a mom and wife and we make a great family. What seals it all together? Love.

I do however dislike Valentine's day. Too commercialized and it makes those without a relationship feel undeserving. Thats not true! Everybody has love all around them, just hiding in different places. One of my great loves is my ex-boss! She is a matronly woman who has more or less adopted me as the daughter she never had! Who ever thought I'd love a boss? I got a phone call from a high-school buddy yesterday.... haven't seen her in 15 years! We're both married and living lives different than those we planned out in school, but we still love each other for who we are, who we were & who we are going to be! Love is all around you and even when you don't feel it, its still there.

02-11-2004, 04:45 PM
I agree, Karen. I never thought love was evil, I was just wondering what L.I.E. meant.:o

Great thread, Karen!:D

02-11-2004, 04:54 PM
I agree with Liana. Love isn't really evil, and the whole "LIE" thing isn't to be taken literally...It's just a joke. I love my pets, and I know that's not evil. :)

02-11-2004, 05:22 PM
Thanks for putting it in perspective, Karen. I couldn't agree with you more. :)

02-11-2004, 05:26 PM
Thanks Karen. That was so inspiring. Very well said.

Tray, what you said here, was great.
Evil spelled backwards is Live. So live to love.

02-11-2004, 07:08 PM
I can't even think how people could call love evil. I totally agree with you Karen.

02-11-2004, 07:26 PM
Beautiful Karen - thank you.

I don't have a significant other in my life, so I tend to ignore Valentines day. I love my family, my son, his fiance, my friends and my pets so to me every day is Valentines day. When I was in high school (many moons ago) I remember they sold carnations that they would deliver to your "valentine". I never received one and it always made me feel bad about myself. Now I am older and wiser and more comfortable with myself, but I still remember those feelings even after 30 years. I think that is how the younger pet talk members are feeling.

It is very nice of you, Karen. to bring it all back into perspective. Love is more about giving it out than receiving cards, candy, fancy restaurant dinners and diamonds.


02-11-2004, 08:52 PM
Thaks for the compliments, folks. It's just a subject that's always been something I feel strongly about! (Obviously, huh?)

02-11-2004, 09:35 PM
Karen, that was a great post.:D

Well written and soooo true.

You feel strongly about this subject, I hadn't noticed. I was shocked to read that you were.:rolleyes::p

02-12-2004, 02:29 PM
;) (Just bumping this up as L.I.E. just got posted in, too)

02-12-2004, 02:48 PM
I'm bumping too, Karen. I have experienced the highs and lows of love. Both ways worked out for me, as Valentine's Day doesn't necessarily mean "romantic" love, but love for all who are important to us.

02-13-2004, 09:32 PM
Love is absolutely not evil. Imagine the world or your life without love.... that's not living. At least no life I want. All kinds of love make up a full life. On Valentine's Day this year, I will celebrate with the man I love. We show each other love and respect every day, but I enjoy having a special day when we recapture what is easily lost during the craziness of regular life. I'll also treasure a card from my parents which will say things I know they feel but things that aren't easily spoken always.
I'm not much for the Sweetest Days and the other Hallmark Holidays, but St. Valentine's Day is - for me- a real and wonderful day with roots in plain old love. Now who can find evil in something like that?

02-14-2004, 01:43 AM
Thank you Karen, this post was sorely needed. On two of the forums I check there were threads bashing Valentine's day and love in general, and it made me very sad.

I don't go for the commercialized holiday much, which is why Alikkon and I are staying home and watching a movie tomorrow. We are going out to brunch on Sunday, but we do that sometimes anyways.

Richard is right, it is so much more worthwhile to love and be loved all year than just one day. So many couples that I see around me seem to take one another for granted a lot of the year, and then get all romantic over Valentine's day. Alikkon never fails to surprise me with how sweet and thoughtful he can be, all year round, and I love that.

So enjoy the day, whether you are single, married, engaged, whatever! :)