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krazyaboutkatz
08-19-2003, 12:25 AM
Hi everyone I usually try to stay away from controversial topics like this but I'm kind of caught up in this one due to 2 co-workers at my work.

Here's the scenario: I work at a dental lab and there was a very important doctor that came by to visit our lab. Our salesman showed him around and introduced him to everyone. A co-worker,I'll call her Betty,who does the billing thought that this doctor was very handsome. He happened to be an Afro-American. Betty happens to be Puerto Rican but has a very dark complexion so she could also pass for an Afro-American. Betty asked another co-worker if she thought that he was handsome. The co-worker, I'll call her Julie, happens to be caucasion. Julie says that he really didn't do anything for her and that she's just not attracted to Afro-Americans.

Betty became very upset and then called Julie a racist. According to my dictionary a racist is someone who believe's that their race is superior. In my opinion, I think that Betty is being way too harsh to Julie. Julie is just expressing her own opinion about something. This doesn't give Betty the right to call her a racist.

I also currently have a new roommate who just happens to be an Afro-American. I asked her opinion about this situation this evening. She said that she also agrees that Betty was very harsh towards Julie and that Julie was just expressing her own opinion. She hasn't ever had this happen to her but if it did she said she would respect the other person's opinion and certainly wouldn't call her a racist.

So does anyone have any advice or different views on this situation? Thanks in advance.

Kfamr
08-19-2003, 01:26 AM
I agree that Betty was being too harsh. If Julie had used harsh words or "racial slurrs" then yes, it would have been racist. She was simply just stating her attractivness towards the man, in which Betty asked for.

Sara luvs her Tinky
08-19-2003, 07:32 AM
I agree... I think Betty overreacted. That is like calling someone racist (for lack of a better word) that has a preferance and are attracted to people over 6 feet tall.

Soledad
08-19-2003, 07:56 AM
I think it's pretty lame to not be attracted to an entire race of people. It's a big call to make.

I don't know if it's racist, but I'm not comfortable with such generalisations. Then again, I've never been the kind of person to be unattracted to trivial things.

Pam
08-19-2003, 08:06 AM
Originally posted by Sara luvs her Tinky
I agree... I think Betty overreacted. That is like calling someone racist (for lack of a better word) that has a preferance and are attracted to people over 6 feet tall.

My thoughts exactly. Wouldn't it be an awful world if we were all attracted to the same type of person (i.e., George Clooney look-alikes! :) ) There simply wouldn't be enough to go around! :) I think the physical attraction is what first draws us in but it is the personality that makes it "stick." I think Betty was just bothered that Julie didn't agree with her but she did ask for her opinion so should have been prepared for an honest answer.

micki76
08-19-2003, 09:34 AM
Originally posted by Sara luvs her Tinky
I agree... I think Betty overreacted. That is like calling someone racist (for lack of a better word) that has a preferance and are attracted to people over 6 feet tall.

I agree completely. There are certain aspects of physical attraction that certain people find appealing. Not everyone likes the same attributes. That's what makes the world go round! I myself am not physically attracted to blonde men. However, there are a few exceptions. Brad Pitt and Brendan Fraiser. :) This does not mean that I'm 'racist'. Nor does it mean that if I met a nice blonde man when I was single, that I wouldn't date him once I got to know him.

Vio&Juni
08-19-2003, 10:35 AM
Well, I have almost the same situation. A co-worker asked me today why her face is so greasy and what should she do to have a normal skin. What should I have told her? That she should try to watch her diet? Yes, of course. But I didn't. I think that she wanted to hear something else. I only tell my sincere opinion if the person asking me is a close friend and knows that I mean well.
I agree that Betty overreacted, but also, Julie could avoid to answer to such a provocative question, I suppose she knew how Betty could react. I would have answered something else, not stating my opinion, probably.

primabella
08-19-2003, 10:38 AM
I also think Betty was overreacting. I was about to make the same comparison as Sara did, but she beat me to it. ;) Preference is different than racism. If she had said, "No he's a ____" and used a racist word, than it would be different.

Chinadoll
08-19-2003, 10:44 AM
Originally posted by micki76
I agree completely. There are certain aspects of physical attraction that certain people find appealing. Not everyone likes the same attributes. That's what makes the world go round! I myself am not physically attracted to blonde men. However, there are a few exceptions. Brad Pitt and Brendan Fraiser. :) This does not mean that I'm 'racist'. Nor does it mean that if I met a nice blonde man when I was single, that I wouldn't date him once I got to know him.

Me too. Y'all took the words right out of my mouth. I equate what she said as being along the same lines as not being attracted to people of a certain height, hair color, or eye color. I certainly don't think it's being racist. Now if she would have made any kinds of slurs along with what she said, that would have been racist, but I think Betty was overly sensitive.

2kitties
08-19-2003, 11:00 AM
yep, i'm with everyone else. no different than preferring blonds over brunettes.

However, has she SEEN LL COOL J lately. He's in SWAT right now and I must say, she'd have to change her mind once she got a look at his chest:eek: :D

popcornbird
08-19-2003, 06:33 PM
Originally posted by Soledad
I think it's pretty lame to not be attracted to an entire race of people. It's a big call to make.

I don't know if it's racist, but I'm not comfortable with such generalisations. Then again, I've never been the kind of person to be unattracted to trivial things.

I agree. I don't think she was being *racist* but she was making generalizations on an entire race. I find that a bit wrong, but I do believe Betty was over-reacting. She could have said it in a nicer way that calling her a racist.

pitc9
08-19-2003, 07:26 PM
I think Betty went overboard BIG TIME!
Hey, we live in a free country!!
If a person doesn't want to date another race, it's there own choice. It's also not like Julie told her not to like him because he was black!! Betty had an opinion and so did Julie!

Racism is hate, it doens't sound like there was hate there!

Your allowed to have your own thoughts about whatever race you want to, and that's not racism, it's your opinion.

It's not like she used a slang term when talking about him either!!!

krazyaboutkatz
08-20-2003, 12:11 PM
Originally posted by pitc9
I think Betty went overboard BIG TIME!
Hey, we live in a free country!!
If a person doesn't want to date another race, it's there own choice. It's also not like Julie told her not to like him because he was black!! Betty had an opinion and so did Julie!

Racism is hate, it doens't sound like there was hate there!

Your allowed to have your own thoughts about whatever race you want to, and that's not racism, it's your opinion.

It's not like she used a slang term when talking about him either!!! I totally agree with you. Thanks for all of your comments everyone. :)

Kfamr
08-20-2003, 02:31 PM
Originally posted by 2kitties

However, has she SEEN LL COOL J lately. He's in SWAT right now and I must say, she'd have to change her mind once she got a look at his chest:eek: :D

OH DEAR YES!!!! *drool* :eek: :D :D

wolfsoul
08-22-2003, 04:36 PM
I don't think it's racist. She was just saying that she isn't attracted to an african-american. It's like someone saying I'm not attracted to people with freckles, or I'm not attracted to people with glasses. It's not like she said that she hates him because he's black, she's just not attracted to him sexually.

Dogz
08-23-2003, 12:08 AM
I think that Betty was overreacting, but I don't think that it was rascist either. Just like Jordan said, she just said that she wasn't attracted to an african-american.