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ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:14 PM
A few of you know me, but for those who don't - I'm a militant activist for the child-free lifestyle.

Anyway, my Boyfriend and I were at the mall this past Sunday and I saw what must've been the most repulsive thing I've seen in quite a while.

We were walking past an Auntie Ann's pretzel stand and decided to get some soft pretzels, so we got into line behind some woman with 2 kids. Well, I'm pretty intolerant of badly-behaved children in public, and I don't care much for kids, but one of them was fairly well behaved so I ignored him. The other one, however, was a different story. She was running around willy nilly like a monkey on crack, screaming at the top of her lungs: "MommIEEEE!!! MOMMMIEEEEEEEEEE!!!" at such a pitch that both BF and I winced and stepped back. Then she proceeded to run up to the display panel where they have pictures of the different sorts of pretzels they sell, and rammed her face up to it and started draging her lips and tongue all over it! All the while the mother was doing NOTHING to reprimand the child... And let's not even get into the unsanitary aspect of this - how many people touch that display panel per day... and god knows what they have on their hands.

I was almost sick right then and there... And I just gave my BF "that look". He rolled his eyes at me in agreement.

Rottieluver45
08-04-2003, 02:17 PM
I like kids, but that is just way too disgusting!! Yuck!!

micki76
08-04-2003, 02:20 PM
Eeeewww!! Some kids I can tolerate, most I just don't like, but that kid's mother was the one I would've wanted to slap! And that's just totally disgusting! AACCCKKKK!!!

HoRsELUvR
08-04-2003, 02:21 PM
ugh.parents should keep their kids under supervision if they're prone to something like that.

allanimalswelcome
08-04-2003, 02:24 PM
I agree that the mother should've done something.

Just out of curiosity-What's wrong with having children?

~Rachel

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:25 PM
Nothing - it's just not for me. I don't want to add to the overpopulation problem, and I don't have the patience or the desire. What's wrong with not having them? :)

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 02:25 PM
That is disgusting. I'm with you on the child-free lifestyle, and I'm also very intolerant of brats like that in public. We had someone let one of their kids KISS A FISH TANK at work REPEAEDLY. I mean, it doesn't get much nastier than that... (Now where's that puking smiley)

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:28 PM
Originally posted by WolfChan
That is disgusting. I'm with you on the child-free lifestyle, and I'm also very intolerant of brats like that in public. We had someone let one of their kids KISS A FISH TANK at work REPEAEDLY. I mean, it doesn't get much nastier than that... (Now where's that puking smiley)

Woohoo! Another CFer!!! You should come to the NoKidding board! :) I'll PM you the URL

Ewww! A fishtank!?!? GROSS!

I don't think there is a puking emoticon on this board... :(

micki76
08-04-2003, 02:29 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
Nothing - it's just not for me. I don't want to add to the overpopulation problem, and I don't have the patience or the desire. What's wrong with not having them? :)

I agree - although over poplulation isn't one of my reasons. I just don't care for kids. No patience on my part and I'm way too selfish to give up my freedom. Everyone else can have them and I can enjoy them for a bit and then go home to peace and quiet! :D

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:30 PM
Originally posted by Airedalekisses
That is totally disgusting! If you think you're anti child-whew I am really staunch anti child-I was a volunteer at planned parenthood-I was dismissed because I advocated Norplant(the under the skin implant that prevents pregnancy for 5 years) for all of the girls under the age of 18 who visited the clinic!I was actually called a genocide follower!!I'm also really tired of the right to life people doing protest marches in front of the clinics-do these people pay for the unwanted child? NO, just see how devoted to the cause they would be if they had to support the child. I've learned my lesson about telling a mother to control her child-I did it in a very nice way-the woman slapped me! :eek:

HAHA I had a Laproscopic Tubal Ligation done back in May just because I know I NEVER WANT KIDS. :) You too should come to the NK board! The more the merrier! We CF'ers have got to stick together!!! :)

:eek: PLANNED PARENTHOOD dismissed you because you were advocating birth control?!?!?!?! WHOA!!!!

I'll PM you the link too!

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:30 PM
Originally posted by micki76
I agree - although over poplulation isn't one of my reasons. I just don't care for kids. No patience on my part and I'm way too selfish to give up my freedom. Everyone else can have them and I can enjoy them for a bit and then go home to peace and quiet! :D

ITA!!! I'm another one that just DOES NOT LIKE them, at ALL. I get a lot of flack from people because of this, but you know what? I don't care. That's their problem!

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 02:31 PM
At work, if I have to warn kids about something, the second time I tell them they will have to leave if I tell them again, the third offense I kick them out. No exceptions. I've been yelled at my irate parents, but you know what? If you want to bring your noise machine into a pet store, don't let them bang on the cages/run around/scream/etc.

Ilovereptiles, thanks for the url! I may become a regular there!

LoudLou
08-04-2003, 02:34 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
...... She was running around willy nilly like a monkey on crack, ...


I'm sorry but this sentence just made my morning!http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons/18.gif

5 Minutes around children like that is a great form of birthcontrol.

Unfortunately, it's not the child's fault they act like monkey's on crack but the parents... I almost always take the time to Compliment parents of well-behaved children when I have to deal with them.

allanimalswelcome
08-04-2003, 02:35 PM
There is nothing wrong with not wanting kids. I just was curious.

I like kids. Sometimes they can be bratty but other times very sweet. I guess a lot of parents choose to ingore their kids behavior bacause they are only doing it to get attention. I was a kid once too!



~Rachel

tikeyas_mom
08-04-2003, 02:36 PM
I love kids, I think this little gurl was just hyper and the mother was probably tired of dealing with her. I can understand that you were groosed out, but how old was she? younge children can somtimes act hyper for attention. I have takin many human services classes and learned alot about childen. I would have told her that, that is "icky" to put your mouth on the class. And to think about all the germs. But thats just me. ;)

NoahsMommy
08-04-2003, 02:39 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
Nothing - it's just not for me. I don't want to add to the overpopulation problem, and I don't have the patience or the desire. What's wrong with not having them? :) Let me commend you on that decision. WAY too many people that don't want kids end up doing so and screwing them up. I think your decision is very selfless and mature. :)

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 02:41 PM
:) :) :) :)

Thank you NM! I get so much flack... you wouldn't believe it.

But I always just tell them, it's my life - I can do what I want.

RICHARD
08-04-2003, 02:46 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
She was running around willy nilly like a monkey on crack, screaming at the top of her lungs: "MommIEEEE!!! MOMMMIEEEEEEEEEE!!!"


monkeys on crack don't scream for their moms....;)

NoahsMommy
08-04-2003, 02:59 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
:) :) :) :)

Thank you NM! I get so much flack... you wouldn't believe it.

But I always just tell them, it's my life - I can do what I want.
I know how you feel. David and I want to adopt our kids....you wouldn't believe the attiitude I get until I finally tell them there could be some health concerns for me. Nice, huh? People are idiots...

wolfsoul
08-04-2003, 02:59 PM
Exactly why I don't plan on having children! :D I have too many younger family members that I see constantly. Enough for me for a lifetime.

I'd rather have pets any day.

I Love Brian, Forever <3
08-04-2003, 03:02 PM
Awwwwwwww you guys. I can't wait to have kids... well, I can wait and I plan to until I've settled down and are financially stable... but I think kids are great. And especialy since you've created LIFE with the one you love. :) :D

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 03:02 PM
*Chuckles* I've always told my mom that if I ever go insane and decide I want a kid, I'll adopt one that's already housebroken. *Laughs* Seriously though, IF something ever goes wrong in my head and I find myself with the desire for offspring, I'm going to adopt one. Not likely though.

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 03:05 PM
Originally posted by NoahsMommy
I know how you feel. David and I want to adopt our kids....you wouldn't believe the attiitude I get until I finally tell them there could be some health concerns for me. Nice, huh? People are idiots...

You'll get no argument from me about the people are idiots statement. It's amazing how so many people are so tunnel-visioned that they just can't accept anyone who has a different outlook on life than they do. Maybe they're threatened by people who are "different", I don't know - but I have a suspicion that's the case.

As if nothing short of a steel magnolia's situation is adequate reasoning for not wanting to have kids - and even then, some people still give you flack. It's amazing to me how shortsighted they can be.

Denyce
08-04-2003, 03:56 PM
Wow what a great thread! *LOL* I have known that I didn't want children for as long as I can remember. The only thing my Barbies were good for were riding my horse statues!. They always had broken hips...*L* I used to hate it when women would say to me...and yes mainly women....."Oh huney you just wait till you meet the right man then you will want to have children" in this totally condesending tone. Well I did meet the right man...and he doesn't want children either..that is why he is the right man!

Airedalekisses...I can't believe someone slapped you!!! I would have filed charges on her immediately. Right there in front of her brats I would have been phoning the police. I usually find that talking loudly about the people with ill behaved brats instead of to them works. Once I was confronted and I just looked all wide eyed and innocent and said..."Oh you thought I was talking about YOU??? Hmmm....perhaps a guilty concience??" and walked away chuckling.

I don't wish to have children for many reasons. One is a lack of patience with them. I have all the tolerance in the world for animals. I have been training all my life it seems. But they don't always understand what you say right away. You have to show them what you expect of them. Children..no...do what I say..NOW. Adults I have even less tolerance for. Most mornings I utter the statement at some point on the irritating drive in that I just hate people. Most times Dumba** also comes out of my mouth. *L*

Also we are really heading for trouble in this world. As it is now the earth is unable to sustain the population organically. That is why so many things that people hate such as pesticides, herbicides, hormones etc are used in order to boost production so that we are able to purchase what we need to survive at a price we can afford. Some kind of population control I believe is necessary. Unfortunately it will be many years before the majority realize this. By then it will be too late.

Denyce

Denyce
08-04-2003, 03:59 PM
Oh yea!

Speaking of disgusting..I would never in a million years buy my bread that wasn't in a wrapper. At this Giant we have here in SC they have all these fancy rolls and bagels in these baskets with no cover on them and not in any type of wrapping...I always see kids touching the rolls and such with their grime, germ, snot laden hands. *shudder* Not to mention the flies that land on them...eww.

Tonya
08-04-2003, 04:06 PM
I think I would have knocked my son out if he licked the display glass. (Not literally ;) ) On the same line, I'm currently dealing with some stuff with my son. We'd thought he was ADD, but now they are trying to diagnose him with mild Autism. He is normally hyper, but well behaved because we work really hard with him... But sometimes I get really sad when he has bad days. He appears to be a normal child, so people look at me like I must be this horrible white trash parent that never disciplines my son.

Tonya
08-04-2003, 04:08 PM
Speaking of disgusting..I would never in a million years buy my bread that wasn't in a wrapper. At this Giant we have here in SC they have all these fancy rolls and bagels in these baskets with no cover on them and not in any type of wrapping...I always see kids touching the rolls and such with their grime, germ, snot laden hands. *shudder* Not to mention the flies that land on them...eww.

Amen to that! I force my son to hold my hand the whole time we are in public because he can't always control himself. There is no excuse for parents letting their children run free.

Tonya
08-04-2003, 04:10 PM
p.s. My mom has me on video tape swearing that I will never ever ever ever have children. A year later, I had Jaden. You'd be amazed at how much parenthood can change you. I never imagined myself being a mother, let alone a good mom. And now, I totally love being a mommy.

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 04:19 PM
Denyce - You and I are like two peas in a pod! I'm going to PM you that nokidding board URL too. It's worth checking out - seriously! You'd be amazed at how many like-minded people there are there.

And now that you mention Barbie Dolls - oh boy - I was always more of a tomboy growing up - I hated Barbie Dolls - My mother once bought me the "Sunshine Family" doll set and I hated it. I wound up ripping the heads off of the dolls. I much preferred my matchbox cars and my big plastic godzilla doll with the punching fist and the shooting plastic flame thingy...

Ugh... Yes I know exactly what you mean about them touching the stuff with their little germy hands - we call them "germ vectors" among other things over at the NK board. It makes me shudder to think about it as well. Bleh!

And I hate it too when women get condescending and pull that "it's different when it's your owwwwwnnn" or "how could you possibly hate chyyyyyldrun! They are our fyooooture!" It makes me want to be sick. Case in point your reference to this reminds me of the time I went to a fambly reunion down in Florida - I hadn't seen these relatives in years, and I was standing on the beach talking to one of them that had like 3 or 4 kids - I told her I didn't want any, and she looked at me strangely, then said in a heavy southern drawl: "Oh darlin'... don't you worry none - some day some mayun will come and he'll give you a preysunt, and it'll just be the happiest day of yer liyuf!!"

Now mind you she said this IN FRONT OF MY CURRENT BOYFRIEND - within earshot. I nearly decked her right then and there, but BF grabbed my arm and DRAGGED me away as he saw my eyes flash daggers. He was afraid I was going to rip her a new one. And I was just about to - so in essence he saved her. Big time.

And another occasion - on another fambly trip to Florida - we all wanted to go on a drive-through safari, so all of us packed into an S-Moo-V (pun intended), and headed off - there were 9 of us in the car - my parents, me, my sister, my Aunt & Uncle, my Cousin Samantha (she was about 2 or 3 at the time), and her parents...

Now my cousin Samantha is a spoiled rotten little snot. I do not like her at all... She's so used to getting her way, everyone thinks it's cute when she throws a fit if she doesn't, and they all laugh at her, but wind up giving her her way so that they perpetuate the behavior.

Anyway - out of 7 other people in the car - all of whom like kids, whose lap does she choose to sit her smelly little diapered butt on? That's right! MINE! Now after going as rigid as a board in disgust and shoving her off of my lap at least 6 times, she still didn't get the hint - and started to climb up onto my lap a 7th time. I went to shove her off my lap again, but this time my mother had taken notice and she pinched my arm so hard she bruised it and whispered "What's WRONG with you!!! Let her sit on your lap!!!!!" viciously in my ear.

I was disgusted for the entire safari trip - here I am sitting there trying to enjoy the animals and I have this kid who reeks of dirty diapers sitting in my lap with her face literally 1 inch from mine, staring at me and grinning like an idiot. I was stiff as a board the whole time and when we drove past the lion exhibit I seriously entertained thoughts of dumping this kid off my lap and getting out of the car - lions or no lions... I was prepared to take the chance. Anything was better than this.

After the trip my mother gave me a good talking to - and I resent her for it to this day. People shouldn't try to force someone who doesn't like kids to like them. It's not right.

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 04:21 PM
See Tonya... You're the type of parent that I don't mind seeing at work! We get quite a few who keep their kids with them and keep them under control, it's just the bad ones that stand out in my mind. :) You're more than welcome to stop by my work anytime. :)

Tonya
08-04-2003, 04:25 PM
:D I said I hold his hand...that doesn't guarantee that his mouth isn't running. lol. The stuff he says is pretty funny though. :D

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 04:29 PM
As long as there's no cage-banging it's all good!

Soledad
08-04-2003, 04:29 PM
I think that we should respect people's rights to have or not have kids without having to trash one decision over the other.

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 04:31 PM
I agree. I didn't see any "trashing" going on.

Soledad
08-04-2003, 04:33 PM
Well, I guess for me I see a lot of extremes on both sides.

I have two sets of friends. One group sees having children as odd at best and horrifying at worst. The other sees having kids as just the natural order and can't understand anyone NOT having kids.

I guess I just don't understand why people give a crap what other people choose to do in regards to kids. Like, what would a stranger get out of convincing you (Wolfchan) to have kids? What's the motivation??

:confused: :rolleyes: b

Uabassoon
08-04-2003, 04:34 PM
I really don't like kids either. Now I'm talking talking about well behaved teenagers that are on this board, I'm talking about little kids. I just get really annoyed with misbehaved children. I don't ever want to have a child. Most people see a baby and go "aww it's so cute." But I have never felt that way, I just don't really like them. I also don't think I'd have the patience to deal with a kid. But I have so much respect for parents who are able to raise well behaved kids.

Airedalekisses
08-04-2003, 04:42 PM
This is a great thread-oh I was a bit naughty to the child whose mother slapped me. I saw the same child in my neighbourhood art store about a week later and he was being his usual obnoxious self. So I told him that I know Santa Claus personally and he wasn't getting a single thing for Christmas no matter how much he cried. The kid went ballistic and screamed to the top of his lungs and threw himself on the floor kicking and crying! I just stood in line with a smug look on my face. That was nice revenge! I know-it wasn't too proper;but sometimes-ya just gotta do something.I didn't want to get into a legal hassle with the kid's mother after she slapped me-she probably would have said I was a child hater or something. The little darlings can do no wrong. I do know some nice kids and have taught them art and my 'dales played soccer with the kids in the neighbourhood-it's just some people shouldn't have children or for that matter even pets. If someone wants children and can support them and be mature enough to properly care for them-that's fine let them have them;but don't get on my case for not just gushing over them. No I don't want to hold your child while you mail a package!!

momoffuzzyfaces
08-04-2003, 05:37 PM
I was meant to be a mother of fuzzy faces, not human ones. Now that I'm safely past having to worry about that, I know I made the right decision for me. The more I see of shows like Jerry Springer, the more grateful I am, I don't have any children.

There was one show (sorry I can't remember which one) where they were talking about women who decided they didn't want children. I could not believe my ears when other women accused them of being selfish for not wanting them. What is selfish about knowing you don't have the patience or want the responsibility of having children? To me it's more selfish to have them and not want them and mistreat them or ignore them because of it. Children deserved to be loved and wanted; anything less is terribly unfair to them.

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 06:58 PM
Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
I was meant to be a mother of fuzzy faces, not human ones. Now that I'm safely past having to worry about that, I know I made the right decision for me. The more I see of shows like Jerry Springer, the more grateful I am, I don't have any children.

There was one show (sorry I can't remember which one) where they were talking about women who decided they didn't want children. I could not believe my ears when other women accused them of being selfish for not wanting them. What is selfish about knowing you don't have the patience or want the responsibility of having children? To me it's more selfish to have them and not want them and mistreat them or ignore them because of it. Children deserved to be loved and wanted; anything less is terribly unfair to them.

I couldn't agree with you more! But alas, there are way too many people who still subscribe to the belief that you're not a complete woman until you've had children, and you're selfish to not want to give up your time and energy for a child.

I think it's a ludicrious line of thinking, but that's just me. I've gotten through the book "I'm okay, You're a brat", and it is definitely a must-read for all parents, wannabe-parents, and ChildFree people alike. Very interesting book.

CathyBogart
08-04-2003, 07:04 PM
According to these people I'm selfish because I want Brian and I to live a life unfettered by children. I want our lives to center around -one another-. I see too many couples who have los touch with each other because their lives are focused on their kids. I refuse to have that happen to us. Besides, as far as the environment is concerned, it's the selfless thing to do!

IloveReptiles: I'm already hooked!

babolaypo65
08-04-2003, 07:27 PM
I love kids. It's some of their parents I have a hard time with. (I wouldn't have enjoyed your experience in the slightest).

allanimalswelcome
08-04-2003, 09:16 PM
I just hate it when people go "Children are smelly, stupid, germy, gross etc." I always say "Forgive me if I am wrong but weren't you a child once?"

Of course I understand Parenthood is not for everyone.

~Rachel

allanimalswelcome
08-04-2003, 09:27 PM
I remember when I was in 3rd grade and I went to a montesorri school. Well we were talking about probelms facing humans or something like that and over population was brought up. My teacher said families should only have one or two kids. I told them I'm in a family of six kids and guess what my teacher said? People like my parents are the reason there are homeless people on the streets:mad:

I was like yea okay whatever. It's not like my parents can do anything about it know!

~Rachel

shais_mom
08-04-2003, 10:00 PM
I don't have children yet, and someday want to I think, but I also agree with people who don't want to have them. A dingbat secretary I work with made the comment about a guy we work with who he and his wife don't have kids b/c of medical reason. She said that is probably the reason he is an a$$hole, b/c he resents not having kids. I don't think that has anything to do with it, I just think he is an A$$HOLE kids or not!

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 10:25 PM
Originally posted by allanimalswelcome
I just hate it when people go "Children are smelly, stupid, germy, gross etc." I always say "Forgive me if I am wrong but weren't you a child once?"

Of course I understand Parenthood is not for everyone.

~Rachel

And my response to this is - yes, and I was a nasty disgusting germ vector too. I'm not ashamed to admit it. ;) hehehe

micki76
08-04-2003, 10:28 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
And my response to this is - yes, and I was a nasty disgusting germ vector too. I'm not ashamed to admit it. ;) hehehe

LOL! Me, too. And I apologize to all the people like me that were, irritated, grossed out, and/or disgusted by me. :D

popcornbird
08-04-2003, 10:33 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
And my response to this is - yes, and I was a nasty disgusting germ vector too. I'm not ashamed to admit it. ;) hehehe

Although I do get get annoyed by certain kids, I hate that some people say kids are disgusting, dirty, headaches, whatever. If that's what you say about kids, don't get offended when people speak of pets that way. People love their kids. They are their life. Saying something like that is in my opinion, more hurtful that people saying such things about animals.

I think kids are cute, but they can get on my nerves. I blame kids' bad behavior on their parents. Its not the kids' fault. Its the fault of the ones who raise them, just like bad dogs are bad because of bad owners. Its not the dogs, its the owners. Same way, its not the kids, its the parents.

ILoveReptiles
08-04-2003, 10:36 PM
PCB - I don't get offended when someone refers to one of my pets as icky or disgusting - they're entitled to their viewpoint. It's what I think that matters. ;)

popcornbird
08-04-2003, 10:47 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
It's what I think that matters. ;)

LOL!

I have seen posts here from people complaining on what people think of their pets. Some of those people don't like kids. What I meant is that people who don't like kids but get offended when people talk bad about their pets, should know that people who love kids feel even worse when they say mean things about kids. :p

As much as I feel like screaming when I see a kid misbehaving, I try my best not to say things like *I hate kids* *kids are crazy* etc. Of course I don't believe those things and I love cute well behaved kids, but when I'm around nutty kids, I sometimes feel like screaming *I HATE KIDS*! Even if its not true. When I'm around good kids, I think to myself, what sweeties they are and that those are the kinds of kids I like. I personally believe its the parents that make kids good or bad. Kids definitely have their own personality and some may be harder to deal with than others, but most parents that have ill behaved children need to take parenting lessons. :o:p

Twisterdog
08-05-2003, 12:55 AM
Now, I'm one of the strange ones .... I have a child that I love dearly ... but in general I am not fond of children. I am of the old-fashioned (obviously!) school of thought that children should behave, listen, obey and be good .... with ALL adults. I don't like children who run amok. Yes, it's the parents' fault ... but I still don't like those kids.

My son is not perfect, but he has been taught manners and respect. As all children should be.

I own a boarding kennel, and it always makes me grind my teeth when I see mom dragging three dirty, whiny, loud kids out of the minivan and into my office ... just to drop off the dog for boarding. The kids are interrupting, touching things ... bleck. Why not leave them in the car?? I have a sign on the wall that says, "Pets welcome. Children must be leashed." The mom in the above example invariably reads it and laughs. I stare at her and her offspring with a straight face and say, "It's not a joke." It's my business, I can do that.
:D

CathyBogart
08-05-2003, 01:53 AM
I don't like kids, but I won't walk up to a mother and announce that to her. I expect the same courtesy to be granted to myself and my pets. If you don't like them, fine, but I don't want to hear about it!

IttyBittyKitty
08-05-2003, 07:33 AM
Banged the nail right on the head ...

The problem with many children these days is that they suffer from neglectful parenting. With that said, however, a decent individual should never blame his or her upbringing on what type of person he or she becomes. So, I too, cannot STAND the bratty monsters that trawl the streets these days.

Many (not all! There need to be more Kay-Ann, Jordan and PCB's around) teenagers irk me the most ... they get on the train, drink WHISKEY straight from a bottle, swear, cuss, spit and make fools of themselves. They are inarticulate, indolent, and have no desire to make a positive contribution to society. This is the generation to whom we are leaving the planet? What a depressing thought....

I am not personally an advocate of being Child Free. I've never been particularly broody either. As for having children? I entertain the possibility of having children as being something that I might like to do. But, I'd much rather be Child Free than being an irresponsible parent.

Another thing ... two reptile lovers being CF advocates ... is there a connection or is that pure coincidence?? :D

ILoveReptiles
08-05-2003, 01:52 PM
Originally posted by IttyBittyKitty
Another thing ... two reptile lovers being CF advocates ... is there a connection or is that pure coincidence?? :D

Hey, that's wild. Maybe there is a connection! I think it's just coincidence though.. ;)

slick
08-05-2003, 02:12 PM
At the risk of getting rude PM's let me just say....

I'm so glad I'm not the only one.

I loathe children, always have, always will. I knew at 17 I did not want to be a Mom and at 50, I've never regretted the decision. Nothing make my sicker than new Moms coming into the office all goo-goo over stacks and stacks of baby pictures. I just walk away.

And respecting others, I in turn don't show off my cat's pictures to people at work. They just don't understand. **Sigh** I'm glad you do!!

boscibo
08-05-2003, 02:42 PM
I don't hate kids, I just prefer to limit my time around them. I love my neices and nephews. I am 37 and child-free. I knew when I was quite young I'd never want my own. Probably when I started babysitting (I was 12, into horses, and needed money for lessons and shows), I babysat a lot, but hated every minute of it.

I got the "You'll change your mind" speech a lot, it got quite sickening. Finally at 37 I don't hear it much anymore. Yikes. I could never figure out why so many people were so concerned about my reproductive choice!

ILoveReptiles
08-05-2003, 02:52 PM
Originally posted by boscibo
I don't hate kids, I just prefer to limit my time around them. I love my neices and nephews. I am 37 and child-free. I knew when I was quite young I'd never want my own. Probably when I started babysitting (I was 12, into horses, and needed money for lessons and shows), I babysat a lot, but hated every minute of it.

I got the "You'll change your mind" speech a lot, it got quite sickening. Finally at 37 I don't hear it much anymore. Yikes. I could never figure out why so many people were so concerned about my reproductive choice!

Well not all CF'ers hate kids...

And I know what you mean about the "You'll change your mind" speech getting sickening. To this day, I too still can't understand why anyone feels compelled to make your reproductive choices their personal business. It doesn't make any sense to me and it never will, yet they continue to try to make it their business and convince you that you're wrong.

Whatever... :rolleyes:

kingrattus
08-05-2003, 08:43 PM
The more I work at the PO, the more I hate kids. these kids r rotten to the core, they break things open things & scream for no reason & some mothers, ok quite a few mothers make their young preteen or younger (6-9) take care of the baby, the darn baby is screaming so horribly I had employees & tones of customes comming over to see what on earth is going on & the poor kids r trying so hard to get their sibbling to calm down, that they look like their gonna cry themselves.

& today we almost hit a toddler that was biking behind a super thick bush onto the road & then he was biking all over thew middle of the road.
THERE WAS NO PARENT IN SIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This kid was maybe 3 yrs old!!!!!

allanimalswelcome
08-05-2003, 08:50 PM
I remember my mom told us my brother used to come to the library where she worked. He was supposed to sit behind the desk and draw or whatever.

One day he ESCAPED FROM THE LIBRARY! Just got up and left. My mom was picking up books another kid was tossing on the floor and trying to deal with him.

Luckliy the library wasn't far from my house and luckily my dad was coming home and he saw him. He was like "What are you going?" and my brother said "To buy a birthday cake and some candles and some other things I need"

Hehe just thought that was funny.

~Rachel

Tonya
08-05-2003, 10:41 PM
I would never try to talk someone out of their decision to not have kids. There are so many people out there that shouldn't be parents...so why would I encourage someone that doesn't want to be a parent to have children. I do think it is to bad and find it offensive that some of you say you hate kids as if all kids are rotten. That is like me saying I hate all pit bulls.

Sevens
08-06-2003, 12:34 AM
Everybody is entitled to their opinions and everyone here who has posted have obviously thought out their course of actions well. I commend you all for standing by your points of view, even if they are not popular.

And I will add my two cents. My husband and I would like to have kids at some point, but we do both have health concerns that need to be addressed in the context of getting pregnant (we are both diabetic, so how would that affect the chances of the baby being diabetic and also how would it affect my health). Or, we may decide to adopt. Either way, we have decided nothing is happening till I am 30 (4 years from now).

What I hate is two things....first, the looks/comments I get about the possibly adopting thing and secondly, I get "30...you want to wait till you are 30 to have kids?!?!?!? That's too old!!!"

When I get the "adopting looks/comments", I usually reference Julia Roberts in Steel Magnolias and be like "you want that to happen to me?"

And to the "30 thing", I usually point out that it would be nice to be 4 years into our marriage and have a house before bringing a kid into the world.

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 01:09 AM
Oh what a sad thread. I find it very disheartening that someone could think my child, just because he is a kid, is discusting and that they would hate him. HATE is a harsh word. I worked hard for my child, and believe labor isn't all that fun either. He is a very nice boy and to think that someone would not give him the chance to get to know him and automatically hate him just because he is a little kid makes me want to cry. That is just so sad.


Some people just do not understand that at some ages, for instance age two, children behave a certain way. It is all a matter of growing up and learning. They don't know better, they have to be taught. Until then it is just unfair to judge a child that doesn't know any better. My son has temper tantrums because that is the only way he can communicate, he can't talk yet, so he has to show me somehow. I just say that to all you who don't want children and I respect your choice, that's a great thing, because you most likely wouldn't make a good parent.


I truly hope that my child grows up to be a good boy, and for now what I am doing seems to be working. :) I love my boy sooooo much!!!!

Tonya
08-06-2003, 01:15 AM
Well said, Luckies4Me. Much love to ya!

popcornbird
08-06-2003, 02:44 AM
Originally posted by luckies4me
Oh what a sad thread. I find it very disheartening that someone could think my child, just because he is a kid, is discusting and that they would hate him. HATE is a harsh word. I worked hard for my child, and believe labor isn't all that fun either. He is a very nice boy and to think that someone would not give him the chance to get to know him and automatically hate him just because he is a little kid makes me want to cry. That is just so sad.


Some people just do not understand that at some ages, for instance age two, children behave a certain way. It is all a matter of growing up and learning. They don't know better, they have to be taught. Until then it is just unfair to judge a child that doesn't know any better. My son has temper tantrums because that is the only way he can communicate, he can't talk yet, so he has to show me somehow. I just say that to all you who don't want children and I respect your choice, that's a great thing, because you most likely wouldn't make a good parent.


I truly hope that my child grows up to be a good boy, and for now what I am doing seems to be working. :) I love my boy sooooo much!!!!

Well said. I'm sure your little Dylan is a real darling baby boy. :) He's so cute! :)

Denyce
08-06-2003, 08:41 AM
I don't hate all children. I dislike children that are abusive to me. And yes I am using the word abusive. When your child is screaming, throwing things, kicking the back of my chair or hurting my ears or body in any way that is abusive. I should not in any way what so ever have to put up with that kind of behavior. It is the parents responsibility at that point to remove the child from the restaurant, movie theater or where ever the child is misbehaving and not subject the rest of us to that. That is what a parent is suppose to do. This attitude of "He/she is JUST A CHILD and that we should have to tolerate it is nonsense. It didn't happen in my generation or in the generations of parents before me. Yet these days it seems to be the norm. That parents too often don't take their kid out of the restaurant when they won't sit still or stop screaming or throwing things. They just IGNORE the child. That is not right. Why should my stomach be upset and tied up in knots and my dinner ruined. I didn't have the kid and I choose not to have kids because I don't want my life disrupted in that manner.

Now luckiesforme I don't know you or your child so I don't know how you deal with him in these circumstances and I would not say I hate your child without knowing you. I would never do that. It isn't fair. I am only speaking of what I have dealt with first hand. My previous paragraph in no way speaks to someone I haven't dealt with personally. If I met your child and he/she was polite and well mannered with a ready smile I am sure I would find him adorable.

My opinion is that parents need to concentrate more on being parents again and raising their children. Getting to be your childs friend doesn't happen till they are already adults. You can't be their friend when you are still teaching them to be responsible, contributing members of society. If you want people to like your child then you have to raise a respectful, likable, pleasent child. It is really as simple as all that.

Denyce

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 08:51 AM
Very well said Denyce! And a very good reference to abusive children. I couldn't have said it better myself.

That being said, the only thing I can think of that I dislike more than abusive children, is the parents who automatically assume that everyone will love their child, and insist that it's their right to subject everyone around them to their child's rotten behavior. The entitlement mindset really gets under my skin, and is quick to anger me greatly.

I too do not like to have my dinner out disrupted by a screaming child that sends my stomach into knots. Nor do I want a movie I go to see disrupted by a child that starts screeching right in the middle of the film. Nevermind that the film is not APPROPRIATE for such a young child... (I've seen parents dumb enough to bring a 3 year old to see Terminator 3!!! Talk about giving the kid NIGHTMARES!!!)

While the screeching and wailing of an ill behaved child irritates me, I can't say that I hate ALL children either - the rare cases where I see a well behaved child, I will actually make it a point to commend the parent for their excellent job in raising that child. But when they're screaming and throwing a temper tantrum, I just want to run the other way.

:D

shais_mom
08-06-2003, 09:13 AM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
I too do not like to have my dinner out disrupted by a screaming child that sends my stomach into knots. Nor do I want a movie I go to see disrupted by a child that starts screeching right in the middle of the film. Nevermind that the film is not APPROPRIATE for such a young child... (I've seen parents dumb enough to bring a 3 year old to see Terminator 3!!! Talk about giving the kid NIGHTMARES!!!)


I saw kids at BASIC INSTINCT when I went to see it when I was in High School. My mom found out I saw it and was Pi$$ed!!! And I was 17!!

Tina
08-06-2003, 09:42 AM
Originally posted by luckies4me
Oh what a sad thread. I find it very disheartening that someone could think my child, just because he is a kid, is discusting and that they would hate him. HATE is a harsh word. I worked hard for my child, and believe labor isn't all that fun either. He is a very nice boy and to think that someone would not give him the chance to get to know him and automatically hate him just because he is a little kid makes me want to cry. That is just so sad.


Some people just do not understand that at some ages, for instance age two, children behave a certain way. It is all a matter of growing up and learning. They don't know better, they have to be taught. Until then it is just unfair to judge a child that doesn't know any better. My son has temper tantrums because that is the only way he can communicate, he can't talk yet, so he has to show me somehow. I just say that to all you who don't want children and I respect your choice, that's a great thing, because you most likely wouldn't make a good parent.


I truly hope that my child grows up to be a good boy, and for now what I am doing seems to be working. :) I love my boy sooooo much!!!!

Thankyou luckies I agree with you:) :)

cloverfdx
08-06-2003, 11:07 AM
great thred :D hey could i get the URL for NK also :D

i am going to be totally honest here;)
i CANNOT tolerate children, and have no desire what so ever to bring one into this crazy $%^#@# up world.

i also get the talks about "oh one day you will change your mind" but NOT from my mother ~cheers~ after about 5 years of getting those talks my mum has given up, and now says when people ask if she is a grandmother "yes i am , my grand daughter has beautiful red hair oh and 4 legs" ~chuckles~


lmao, i also get the "when are you going to get married" talk
:o my reply "dont think it legal yet" lmao:rolleyes:

Airedalekisses
08-06-2003, 11:20 AM
I don't know-maybe because I'm over 50-but when I was a child-you didn't have temper tantrums-communication-puleeze! Whatever happened to asking nicely and if the child can't talk what ever happened to pointing and shaking one's head yes or no? Maybe I'm too much of disciplinarian;but a child shouldn't have tantrums in the first place-a bit of value teaching might just be in order!! And don't get mad at me if your child is screaming and I walk away or complain to a store manager-I have a right to be in this world, too. If parents are sooo child obsessed maybe they should teach them to be a little better behaved. To be loved be lovable! No one loves a screamer-ask anyone!!Yes, the scream only a mother could love!!

2kitties
08-06-2003, 11:22 AM
Oh, I could go on for days about this!

I don't have children, I am almost 28 years old. I will not be having children any time soon. I may never have them.
I think what is important is that people have children when they want them and are ready for them. If I ever feel the "maternal urge" and my finances, relationships, home, etc are in order, then okay. But if that day never comes, then I will be just fine with it.

I, too, HATE it when people say things about my age and getting older. I mean, no matter what, I wouldn't want to think about having kids in my 20's. No way. I enjoy waking up on Friday and deciding where to go to dinner, or if I want to catch a play or drive to the water or catch a plane to Vegas. I like grown up vacations and grown up restaurants and a Cranberry Martini or two. So, I'm not ready to share my life with a child. I woudln't be a good mother at this point.

Why can't people realize that having a baby at a time when you will be a bad parent is completely selfish. Just because I'm almost 30, there are people who believe I shoudl run out and procreate no matter what. That's disgusting if you ask me.

So I may never have children. I may have them later. I'm okay with it either way.

I also know people who clearly can't afford children, have rocky relationships, etc. and they still keep popping them out for their "loving family." Whatever.

If I have children, I want to be in a position to never HAVE to say no to them. I will say no to them because I CHOOSE to.

I respect families and children, as well as the desire to have children. What I do not respect are undisciplined children and parents who do not respect the necessity of family plannign when it is appropriate.

There are millions of people out there who desperatly want children and can't have them. They are on adoption waitlists years long. They can provide wonderful, loving homes. And teenagers are out there keeping babies and having more to get the food stamps.

Sorry if that makes me evil, but I just don't understand that.

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 11:44 AM
Originally posted by Denyce

Now luckiesforme I don't know you or your child so I don't know how you deal with him in these circumstances and I would not say I hate your child without knowing you. I would never do that. It isn't fair. I am only speaking of what I have dealt with first hand. My previous paragraph in no way speaks to someone I haven't dealt with personally. If I met your child and he/she was polite and well mannered with a ready smile I am sure I would find him adorable.
Denyce

I don't have to deal with him in those circumstances because I am never in them. I would never take a little kid to the movies, that is just rude, nor do we take him out to eat to us unless it's somewhere like Taco Bell, or what not. I like to enjoy my dinner, and it's not fun when your son is throwing his bottle on the floor over and over again just to watch it drop...

But if I do decide to take him to the mall and he gets up and runs around, I let him. I let him explore, as long as he's not acting like a lunatic on the loose. I am not one to not allow him his freedom, to walk around if he so pleases if he is being a good boy because I think that is very sad, and I hate seeing mothers do that. Sometimes a kid will simply ask for something and the mother will snap and smack the child and it makes me sick. I hate people like that. :mad: It makes me sad for children who grow up that way, their parents need help. I am a firm believer in discipline, if my boy acts up and knows he should not do a certain thing, he is punished, by either being removed from the area or at home he goes for time out in his crib.

I keep hearing people without kids saying well we have rights and blah blah blah, well we are parents have rights too, and if we want to take our children somewhere and you don't like that they are making noise, LEAVE! Or ignore them, which is sometimes the best thing. Dylan rarely has temper tantrums because I IGNORE him, meaning he gets no satisfaction out of it. I know a lot about raising children, the right way. I have a Healthy Start lady over every week who goes over milestones in child developement etc. She explains to me that having temper tantrums are normal and teaches self control and good discipline, not hitting.

As long as I am comfortable in my parenting method I could care less what anybody else thinks.

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 11:59 AM
Originally posted by luckies4me
I keep hearing people without kids saying well we have rights and blah blah blah, well we are parents have rights too, and if we want to take our children somewhere and you don't like that they are making noise, LEAVE! Or ignore them, which is sometimes the best thing.
As long as I am comfortable in my parenting method I could care less what anybody else thinks.

:eek: Or maybe parents who are in a situation like this should have the common courtesy to recognize that in a public situation, say a MALL... it's not very realistic to expect ALL of the other patrons in the mall to either put up with the screeching or leave.

A nicer/more responsible thing to do as a parent would be to pack up your belongings and leave, then save the trip for another day.

I know that when I acted up as a child, my parents would stop what they were doing, leave, and come back later perhaps when they had found a BABY SITTER for me.


:rolleyes:

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 12:14 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
:eek: Or maybe parents who are in a situation like this should have the common courtesy to recognize that in a public situation, say a MALL... it's not very realistic to expect ALL of the other patrons in the mall to either put up with the screeching or leave.

A nicer/more responsible thing to do as a parent would be to pack up your belongings and leave, then save the trip for another day.

I know that when I acted up as a child, my parents would stop what they were doing, leave, and come back later perhaps when they had found a BABY SITTER for me.


:rolleyes:


You obviously did not understand anything I said. Did I say my son would be screeaching? NO I did not, if he is simply just making a little noise, then oh well, they can put up with it or leave. If my son was screaming I wouldn't have him there, period. I wouldn't want to deal with it and neither would anyone else, but esepcially ME! I wouldn't take a screaming child anywhere, it's not something I want to deal with. If my son decides to act that way he can go home, I won't deal with it.

Airedalekisses
08-06-2003, 12:44 PM
Oh we understood everything you said Luckie-and I agree children shouldn't be slapped;but come on a "time out" and tantrums help in development-yeah development of a rebellious teenager and a probably nasty adult. You know we who posted on this thread are not some monsters who wish every child had never been born-we're just asking for a bit of consideration and understanding-I know you're probably ticked at those of us who say we have rights, too. Well of the children I have seen-if they are our future-I pity the future!!

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 12:48 PM
Something worth reading.....


A study showed that parents usually control and guide toddlers in one of two ways:

1. Power Control- includes spanking, using force and taking away things or favors. It also includes not hugging, kissing or talking to the child.

2. Reasoning control- means telling the child WHY she should act a certain way, in simple words that she can understand. Reasoning means pointing out that the behavior could hurt her or others.

For example, if your child throws sand, power control might be yelling, or hitting her. Reasoning might be telling her that throwing sand could hurt other children by getting sand in their eyes, or in her own, and she must stop.


Reasoning works better! The study showed that parents who used reasoning were better able to control their children's behavior and teach them to cooperate.



In my opinion it doesn't do any good to tell a screaming child to stop screaming, by yelling at them. :rolleyes: You can teach them that yelling is not appropriate, and explain to them why. This is what I do and so far it's working great. My son is very well behaved, I don't know if I just got lucky or what, but I know I WAS NOT that way growing up, but I was also raised differently. I was not disciplined lovingly, it was with a whip and leash so to speak. I for one will not raise my child that way, and I know it's the right way for me, because it's working and I could not have asked for a better child.


Now you all have me thinking what exactly do you consider a temper tantrum? I may be a little overboard, but I think just crying and carrying on is one, Dylan never throws himself to the floor and kicks, although my younger sister used to do that...drove me crazy BTW. If it's kicking and crying and acting like a deranged person than I can honestly say that Dylan has not had one. If that is what you guy's have experienced than I feel for you because it drives me insane! I hate seeing kids that way, grrr. I just think I was blessed. :)


But not all the things children do are a direct cause from parents, like my younger brother for instance. Talk about a hell child!!! But he had ADD and with Hyperactivity which makes it worse! Finally after a gazillion years we went to a ADD meeting, (funny all the other people there were also shaking their feet, if you have ADD you know what I am talking about) my mom put him on meds and he got the help he needed. Now you would never have guessed, he's a straight A student, so focused and a nice young man.


Believe me, there are parents out there who try and try but the children need more help then the parents can give. Some kids are just plain rotten.


Here is something that helped me with Dylan though:

Guidelines and Discipline: Rules

Sometimes between 15 and 24 months, toddlers may become resistant and defiant. You will probably hear them say "no" a lot. Toddler want to test their independence and pwer, and show you how important they are. They may do this by saying "No!" This is a sign they are growing up. Be patient.

Making rules
Early on, you need to choose some simple rules- a few, not too many. Make rules your toddler can understand and follow. Most important, make rules that you can enforce all the time.

Rules like these help your toddler learn that he can and should follow rules- even if he really doesn't like them. He needs to know this to grow into a respsonsible adult.

Be consistent ( I cannot stress this enough!!!!) If you have a tule against candy before dinner, try to enforce this everyday. Otherwise, you teach your toddler that rules don't matter, or that they can be easily broken.

Use reasoning

Explain in simple words WHY you have the rule. Say something like. "Hole my hand when we cross the street so I can keep you safe". This helps your toddler learn that rules have a purpose. Studies show that children follow rules better when they are given reasons. Understanding the reason helps toddlers remember the rule.


I also want to add that other members of the family need to enforce these rules as well. If they are not allowed to do something at home, the same should apply when at the sitters etc.

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 12:49 PM
Something worth reading.....


A study showed that parents usually control and guide toddlers in one of two ways:

1. Power Control- includes spanking, using force and taking away things or favors. It also includes not hugging, kissing or talking to the child.

2. Reasoning control- means telling the child WHY she should act a certain way, in simple words that she can understand. Reasoning means pointing out that the behavior could hurt her or others.

For example, if your child throws sand, power control might be yelling, or hitting her. Reasoning might be telling her that throwing sand could hurt other children by getting sand in their eyes, or in her own, and she must stop.


Reasoning works better! The study showed that parents who used reasoning were better able to control their children's behavior and teach them to cooperate.



In my opinion it doesn't do any good to tell a screaming child to stop screaming, by yelling at them. :rolleyes: You can teach them that yelling is not appropriate, and explain to them why. This is what I do and so far it's working great. My son is very well behaved, I don't know if I just got lucky or what, but I know I WAS NOT that way growing up, but I was also raised differently. I was not disciplined lovingly, it was with a whip and leash so to speak. I for one will not raise my child that way, and I know it's the right way for me, because it's working and I could not have asked for a better child.


Now you all have me thinking what exactly do you consider a temper tantrum? I may be a little overboard, but I think just crying and carrying on is one, Dylan never throws himself to the floor and kicks, although my younger sister used to do that...drove me crazy BTW. If it's kicking and crying and acting like a deranged person than I can honestly say that Dylan has not had one. If that is what you guy's have experienced than I feel for you because it drives me insane! I hate seeing kids that way, grrr. I just think I was blessed. :)


But not all the things children do are a direct cause from parents, like my younger brother for instance. Talk about a hell child!!! But he had ADD and with Hyperactivity which makes it worse! Finally after a gazillion years we went to a ADD meeting, (funny all the other people there were also shaking their feet, if you have ADD you know what I am talking about) my mom put him on meds and he got the help he needed. Now you would never have guessed, he's a straight A student, so focused and a nice young man.


Believe me, there are parents out there who try and try but the children need more help then the parents can give. Some kids are just plain rotten.


Here is something that helped me with Dylan though:

Guidelines and Discipline: Rules

Sometimes between 15 and 24 months, toddlers may become resistant and defiant. You will probably hear them say "no" a lot. Toddlers want to test their independence and power, and show you how important they are. They may do this by saying "No!" This is a sign they are growing up. Be patient.

Making rules
Early on, you need to choose some simple rules- a few, not too many. Make rules your toddler can understand and follow. Most important, make rules that you can enforce all the time.

Rules like these help your toddler learn that he can and should follow rules- even if he really doesn't like them. He needs to know this to grow into a respsonsible adult.

Be consistent ( I cannot stress this enough!!!!) If you have a rule against candy before dinner, try to enforce this everyday. Otherwise, you teach your toddler that rules don't matter, or that they can be easily broken.

Use reasoning

Explain in simple words WHY you have the rule. Say something like. "Hold my hand when we cross the street so I can keep you safe". This helps your toddler learn that rules have a purpose. Studies show that children follow rules better when they are given reasons. Understanding the reason helps toddlers remember the rule.


I also want to add that other members of the family need to enforce these rules as well. If they are not allowed to do something at home, the same should apply when at the sitters etc.

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 12:53 PM
Originally posted by Airedalekisses
Oh we understood everything you said Luckie-and I agree children shouldn't be slapped;but come on a "time out" and tantrums help in development-yeah development of a rebellious teenager and a probably nasty adult. You know we who posted on this thread are not some monsters who wish every child had never been born-we're just asking for a bit of consideration and understanding-I know you're probably ticked at those of us who say we have rights, too. Well of the children I have seen-if they are our future-I pity the future!!


Where did I say temper tantrums help developement? Do not put words into my mouth please. Yes a time out can help, when you have done everything else that is my last option and I WILL use it. It's either go in the crib, or be smacked, and I prefer not smacking.

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 12:57 PM
There are varying degrees of temper tantrums, and yes I consider crying and carrying on to definitely be a temper tantrum. Anything that a child does when they're upset that they cannot have their way is a temper tantrum IMHO...

But here's a real doozy:



Temper Tantrum!!! (http://www.caicos.org/spoiled/brat.html)

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 01:05 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
There are varying degrees of temper tantrums, and yes I consider crying and carrying on to definitely be a temper tantrum. Anything that a child does when they're upset that they cannot have their way is a temper tantrum IMHO...

But here's a real doozy:



Temper Tantrum!!! (http://www.caicos.org/spoiled/brat.html)


Oh god! :eek: Now I know I am lucky lol.


Just want to clarify that just because a child cries doesn't mean it's because he's not getting his way. Children cry for all sorts of reasons, it shows they are unhappy and is a natural way of communicating. For instance last night I was doing dishes while Dan was on the computer. Dylan came over to Dan and was tugging on his diaper, I was watcing, Dylan was fussy. Dan got mad because he was fussy, so his diaper went unchanged. Dylan came back over tuggin on his diaper, clearly showing that he wanted it changed, which was obvious as you could smell he poopied in his pants. So I told Dan, duh, he wants his diaper changed! Can you not see him trying to tell you? If I had poop in my pants you better believe I wouldn't be a happy camper either. He changed his diaper and Dylan was fine. Lesson learned for both of them. Dan- pay attention! and Dylan- next time you need your diaper changed go to mommy. :p


Anyways, I respect peoples decision to not have children. What bugs me is when people still bug you even after you have one! I remember it was only about a month after I had Dylan and my step father was already asking me when the next was comming. I almost fainted. Ones enough! As much as I love Dylan, kids are a lot of work, deffinately not for everybody.

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 01:17 PM
I can totally understand you being irritated by people continuing to bug you to have another.

I will never understand why some people take so much interest in the reproductive choices of anyone other than themselves. I don't see how it's any of their business.

I am aware of the fact that children cry for all sorts of reasons. But this does not change the fact that I cannot stand the wailing and crying noises no matter what the reason is. To ask me to sit by idly and tolerate it is out of the question. Most often you will find me doubling back and running in the opposite direction. I have extremely sensitive ears, and piercing noises drive me straight up the wall.

I'm fully aware of the fact that I'd make a horrible mother. I don't have the patience or the desire to deal with any of that. But if you do, then great. More power to ya. Just so long as you don't try to force me to love being around children. Plain and simple - it will never happen.

I've had people try constantly to "talk me into" liking kids. In all honesty, I think that is wrong. I don't like being around them, I don't like the way they smell, I don't like the noises they make, and I especially don't like it when they start crying/wailing/screeching for any reason. I think it's great that you like them - but I don't. And I don't understand it when people take it as a personal insult against them when I say I just don't enjoy being around children at all.

Denyce
08-06-2003, 01:19 PM
Ok. I am going to reply to some of this in a bit but right now my eyes have rolled so far into the back of my head that I can't see correctly. :rolleyes:
ok yes...smart mouthed of me but right now I can't help it.

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 01:23 PM
Well said. I totally understand, and as a parent, believe me, I hate to hear crying and whailing as well, although it rarely occurs with Dylan. His cousin is another story though. :p


I don't think anyone can talk someone into liking kids. I LOVE my son, but I don't always like him, and I don't really care for other peoples children unless they are well behaved, or babies. I just ADORE babies. hehe


Yes well I am still being bugged to have another child. I had problems conceiving the first, and second time, and I just do not have the energy to try again. Dylan is a handful right now. I don't think I could have another soon. As soon as I go back and finish college, maybe a few years down the rode. Just not now, I don't have the patience for another. Of course my family would LOVE to have me pop out three more, just to make them happy. I tell them, if you want one so badly, have your own!


I'd like to adopt my next child. If I can be spared the morning sickness and labor then it's more appealing to me.


One thing that makes me sad is when we are out with Dylan, and he is being such a good boy. He will wave to someone, smile and say hi, and they will comepletely ignore him or say something like "What do you want?" in a threatening tone, when all he was doing was being friendly. You can see the sadness on his face, and it ruins our day. It's one thing to not like kids, but you don't have to be rude about it. There's no excuse to treat someone that way. *sigh*

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 01:37 PM
What's wrong with ignoring? I am so sick of people assuming that I have to go all gaa gaa over every kid that waves at me.

If that makes me a b****, then so be it. I won't out and out say something threatening, that's not right... But don't expect me to start googling and drooling over a kid. It just won't happen.

MAYBE - it entirely depends on my mood, I will flash a quick smile, but other than that - I'll just ignore and keep walking.

Airedalekisses
08-06-2003, 01:50 PM
AMEN to the not gaa gaa goo gooing-hey and I'm not religious-let's not nit pick at that one.
What I abhor is being on an airplane with a child and the mother changes the diaper right at the seat!! Oh, yes it's happened more than once and when I said something about going to the restroom the mothers gave me a look that could have killed. I now ask if the flights have any children passengers, if they do- I will change my reservation! I don't want to smell dirty diapers and hear screaming all the way to my destination and here's another topic I don't want to see breastfeeding in public-I don't care if it's natural and you put a blanket over yourself. I, also, resent the fact that babies are allowed to sit on the mother's lap on planes-the seats are small enough without two persons taking up one seat. Why should I have to pay for first class just to avoid this? Enough ranting and raving-oh, am I gonna hear it from the La Leche league!!

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 01:52 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
What's wrong with ignoring? I am so sick of people assuming that I have to go all gaa gaa over every kid that waves at me.

If that makes me a b****, then so be it. I won't out and out say something threatening, that's not right... But don't expect me to start googling and drooling over a kid. It just won't happen.

MAYBE - it entirely depends on my mood, I will flash a quick smile, but other than that - I'll just ignore and keep walking.


What would it hurt to just look at them? You don't have to get all goo goo on them, but a simple glance in their direction, and not a mean one wouldn't kill you. It seems like the polite thing to do. So yes I do find that rude. But well our opinions differ and I'll leave it at that. There is no sense in arguing over something that cannot be changed. So......

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 02:01 PM
I'd also like to add, that this is a controversial subject, and emotions are going to fly, so I think it would be safe to have this thread moved to the Dog House!

cloverfdx
08-06-2003, 02:05 PM
What's wrong with ignoring? I am so sick of people assuming that I have to go all gaa gaa over every kid that waves at me.

~nods~ i totally agree, we do not have to speak/smile/drool over everychild that comes up and does the whole "look arnt i just the cutest thing you have ever seen" act

oh how i wish there was a vomiting smilie ;)

one quick note, im not saying that i hate children (hate is such a harsh word) i just dislike them , and i know i would make a ghastly human mother and it would be down right selfish of me to ever consider having a child in my life (not that it would happen any) ~shudders at the thought~

well im off to bed now, and will probably dream of children ~URGH~ after reading through this thread

just added a pic of my "child"

"dogs are the best people"

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 02:06 PM
Originally posted by luckies4me
I'd also like to add, that this is a controversial subject, and emotions are going to fly, so I think it would be safe to have this thread moved to the Dog House!

I think you're right - it should probably be moved to the dog house...

luckies4me
08-06-2003, 02:13 PM
Who cares anymore? LOL


I just saw something really funny and now I cannot stop laughing.


cloverfdx- I LOVE the saying in your profile........about putting all men on the moon. hahah that just made me chuckle.


:p

cloverfdx
08-06-2003, 02:26 PM
thats right each to there own- so to speak

LMAO oh dear i thought id get told to take that out of my signiture ;)

it is from www.internetstickers.com (http://) and there are some realy great ones there :D

Denyce
08-06-2003, 02:41 PM
Ok. Now that I have had time to formulate some thoughts...here goes.

1. Yes this should be moved to the Dog House and under a different title.

2. Cass....I really do not understand why in the world you felt it necessary to post a very long diatribe as to what YOU believe to be proper parenting techniques. Were you attempting to inform all of us who have decided not to have children why we should become more tolerant of someone's brat because they are trying to REASON with a TWO year old. Were you taking that attitude I so hate that just because I haven't given birth I can't possibly understand how to parent? That I am just a complete idiot and they only way you can gain this knowledge is by giving birth? I am sorry if this is sounding personal but I was very offended by your post on parenting. I am glad you have found something that you feel works for you. Many parents don't. I am also glad that you don't take your child to movies it shouldn't be at or expensive restaurants. Many parents do.

3. I know quite a bit about parenting. Just because I don't have a child doesn't mean I haven't been in this situation. I have a much younger step-brother who has SEVERE behavioral problems. He was classified by the "experts" as having a conduct disorder with undersocialized aggression. In other words he has the potential to be a murdering psychopath. My mother went through hell with this child. I went through hell with this child. And you know what? He had blonde curly hair, dimples and pretty blue eyes and his very favorite thing to do was to smile cutely and wave at people in public places so that suckers would go gaa gaa over him and smile back waving and saying...."awwwwww...isn't he just sooooo cute?????" Of course this was just after he tried to kill my 4 year old cousin by attempting to push him down some steep stairs or tried to kill his family by blowing out the pilots in the gas stove and cranking up the gas in the middle of the night while everyone else was asleep. Or how about the time he smashed my mother over the head with a baseball bat while she was sleeping sending her to the emergency room? So no. Because of my experience I don't always smile at a "cute" kid when they attempt purposely to get my attention. I listened to all the "experts" tell us how we had to just have more PATIENCE with Kendall. We just had to reason with him more...explain to him why his behavior was inappropriate. So I am sorry if I am coming off angry. Like I said..your post on parenting offended me greatly. I have been to places with children you never want to see and I don't appreciate being told I have to have more restraint and patience with bratty children.


I would like to post further on this whole topic but perhaps when I have calmed down more. I really don't like getting personal with controversial issues. And I must apoligize for seeming to attack. This just touched a real sore spot for me. When my step brother started attempting to kill the family he was only 5..when he sent my mom to the emergency room he was only 8. He spent the remainder of his youth in a home for boys with problems. My parents are still paying the costs for that. The last I had heard he was going to Med School in the Albequrque area. *shudder*

Denyce

Airedalekisses
08-06-2003, 05:57 PM
I didn't put a single word in your mouth-You said and I quote, "The Healthy Start lady who goes over child development explains that temper tantrums are normal and teaches self control and good discipline." not out of context or anything. This debate could go on forever-but some people think children are perfect and they have a god given right to have children. Well don't step on my rights-just keep your child as far away from me as possible and I won't make any rude comments about the child and you don't make any about someone who prefers the company of animals and adults!!Enough said. Enjoy your child as much as possible!

ILoveReptiles
08-06-2003, 07:00 PM
I KNOW I'm going to catch h#ll for this, but I honestly feel that there should be a mandatory test that all people who intend to have children must take... And they MUST PASS IT to prove that they can be responsible parents and teach their children the right way to behave.

I think there should be mandatory (reverseable) sterilization for everyone on the onset of puberty, and they should have to take the parenthood test and pass in order to have the sterilization reversed.

Feel free to cut me apart... but I stand by this. After all - you need a license to drive, a license to get married, etc... but any loser can become a parent. It just doesn't make sense to me.

Denyce
08-06-2003, 07:53 PM
When a person makes the choice to become a parent they give up certain privledges and freedoms that those of us who choose to remain childless still have. When the parent takes the child into a restaurant they should be doing so with the expectation that they may not be able to finish their meal. It is the parents RESPONSIBILITY to make sure that their child behaves in a manner that is respectful and polite. If they do NOT then it is the parents RESPONSIBILITY to remove the offending child from that environment so as to not step on the RIGHTS of the rest of the patrons who are spending their hard earned money and precious free time on an evening out.

If a child is acting out...throwing a temper tantrum, whining, crying, kicking out then the child is unhappy for some reason. A good parent should remove the child and take them to a place that makes them happier. Perhaps the child is tired, bored or whatever..that doesn't matter the child is apparently unhappy and should be dealt with.

I do not advocate the beating of children. I do advocate consistancy, firmness and paying attention to the wants and needs of your child. If a child is not able to behave like a human being and insists upon acting like a chimp on steroids then they should be removed and then next time the parents are going out to say a restaurant again they EXPLAIN to the child that because their behaivour was unacceptable the last time so this time they get to stay home with a babysitter and have liver and brussell sprouts. :D Eventually the child will learn that only by being a civilized human will they get the treat of pizza or whatever the better food is.:cool:

Those of us who remain child free should not have to leave a store, mall, restaurant or anywhere else because someone elses child is being a brat. The brat needs to leave. We didn't have children so we don't have to deal with bratty children why in the world should we have to put up with someone elses. And if the parent of the bratty child refuses to remove them then they have to deal with the dirty looks, the complaints to managers, people telling them how disgusting thier child is and all the other negative responses. This world is made up of actions and reactions. Consequences both good and bad.

I have always said there should be a test before someone can get pregnant. :rolleyes: A person at my work is having his third illegitamate child with a third woman. :rolleyes: Yea...he is the model of responsibility.

Denyce

Airedalekisses
08-06-2003, 10:52 PM
oh, absolutely agree with the license-I was cut to ribbons for advocating Norplant in all unmarried women under the age of 18 who came to the planned parenthood clinic-some of them were dragged by their mothers because they didn't want to see their child's life ruined by an unwanted pregnancy-I'm sick and tired of hearing these little 14 year old girls saying they want a baby because it will love them unconditionally!! I watched a talk show -this sweet:rolleyes: guy had 6 children by 6 different women and he was all of 18. Oh those kids are really going to have a good life-they'll have tantrums just to get the attention they never got!!The young mothers resent them; the father can't support them financially or emotionally-he is essentially a sperm donor nothing more!!

CathyBogart
08-06-2003, 11:58 PM
So I should have to remove myself from a nice dinner with my mate because I don't want to hear junior screaming his head off? No.

I think next time I make flight arrangements I'm going to make sure there aren't any small children on board...because last time one was squalling all night while I attempted to sleep. Unexcusable.

I think I would make a darn fine parent. I choose not to because A: I don't care for kids and B: I want to concentrate on being a wonderful mate to my man.

There is never an excuse for a tantrum being thrown in a ublic place without the offending creature being removed. I don't care if they're in the middle of a shopping trip or whatever. The PARENT made the choice to bring the child out in public, they should be prepared to leave immediately should the child start up. My mom did it, and it sure worked for me! I learned quickly that screaming was -not- how to get what I wanted.

GO PREGNANCY LICENSE! I wish I had had some sterilization process done when I was young....It would have saved me a lot of anguish when my ex purposely got me pregnant at sixteen so that I wouldn't leave him. :mad: :mad: Obviously it didn't work, but I wish it had been prevented.

luckies4me
08-07-2003, 12:25 AM
Originally posted by WolfChan


GO PREGNANCY LICENSE! I wish I had had some sterilization process done when I was young....It would have saved me a lot of anguish when my ex purposely got me pregnant at sixteen so that I wouldn't leave him. :mad: :mad: Obviously it didn't work, but I wish it had been prevented.

Man WolfChan, that is horrible. I cannot believe someone would do that? :eek: That's just crazy!


I just wanted to say that everything you guys are saying I AGREE with. YES it is the parents respsonsibility to not have a child that acts like a satanist. My child is well behaved so fortunately I rarely have to deal with it. ;)

Crikit
08-07-2003, 01:52 AM
Okay well I just got around to reading...well mostly reading this thread. When I have the time and don't have to get up a 6 in the morning I'll read the rest.

I have to say that I to am one of those people who does not and will not have children, it's not my thing. There's a running joke with me that I'm going to be the crazy dog lady or to my friends kids if they have them I'll be crazy auntie Tracy...the one they hardly ever see. I can't really say why I don't like children I just don't, I have no explanation for it, but I have a feeling that part of it lies in the fact that for the last 8 years I've had to live with my spoiled brat of a niece, but to be honest even before that I didn't like kids...heck I think I didn't even like kids when I was a kid. Now someone explain that one to me?

Do I think that I'll ever change my mind, probably not. Kids just aren't in my future I would gladly take dogs over kids anyday.

shais_mom
08-07-2003, 09:28 AM
I have 2 nephews that I adore, but I am glad when they or I go home!!!

I don't think that paid sterilization is a bad thing. I would be willing for my tax dollars to go to paying a drug addict $200 to get their tubes tied or a hysterectomy as long as they don't bring more drug addicted babies into the world.
Working in a hospital I know of several women that just keep having babies until 'they let me keep one'. B/c all the rest are in foster care.
Makes me sick.

ILoveReptiles
08-07-2003, 02:25 PM
WolfChan ... I'm so sorry to hear you got Oopsed.

IMHO, that's got to be one of the absolute WORST things someone can do to another person.

As far as I'm concerned, if someone tries that, all trust is gone. That's a huge deal breaker.

I don't know what posesses these people to do such selfish things. It's really enraging.

ILoveReptiles
08-07-2003, 02:26 PM
One of my cousins recently had a baby shower... I'm glad I didn't go because as a gift I was planning to get him a bottle of Jack Daniel's, and a sympathy card.

:rolleyes:

Cheshirekatt
08-07-2003, 02:29 PM
Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
Nothing - it's just not for me. I don't want to add to the overpopulation problem, and I don't have the patience or the desire. What's wrong with not having them? :)

I'm with you. People always ask me why I don't want to have kids. My reply? I don't like them!

I see way too many people who seem to not like their kids but keep having more.....I'll never understand.

ILoveReptiles
08-07-2003, 02:52 PM
Originally posted by Cheshirekatt
I'm with you. People always ask me why I don't want to have kids. My reply? I don't like them!

I see way too many people who seem to not like their kids but keep having more.....I'll never understand.

And is it really any of their business why you don't want them? Why must people grill us for wanting to remain child-free?!?!?

You don't see them grilling anyone who professes to want kids, asking them why why why why? Do you? I mean HECK! In this society, a kid can be 15 and say Hey I wanna have a baby now. She'll be revered as a super moo and praised for making sacrifices, etc...

However if that same 15 year old child said "Hey I never want kids." The reaction she gets is ooo... well you'll change your mind... blah blah blah - let's play breeder bingo.

Why can't they just leave us alone?!?!?!

luckies4me
08-07-2003, 07:52 PM
It's bad enough to have people asking you, but what about if you ALREADY have a child!!! One is ENOUGH for me right now, that's what I can handle. When I feel my breasts are no longer saggy, I have the energy back, and I have more money saved and our house is fixed up , maybe then I will decide to have another. I am not some baby machine! Labor sucks, pregnancy sucks (at least until the morning sickness is gone........then there are a couple months you like, then it gets bad again because you have constant pressure on your bladder, can't sleep etc.) and there are a few times after the baby comes you feel like you want to explode. Of course the good outweight the bad. ;) But I just do not want another right now.


I always hear, oh I can't beleive you aren't trying for another baby. Excuse me, but i think a few miscarriages are enough for me! I guess I am so selfish because I do not want to give Dylan a brother or sister, so he's going to be alone all his life. How sad.

Give me a break. My sons got it good! :rolleyes:

Airedalekisses
08-07-2003, 09:07 PM
With me it was always at a wedding they would say , "You're next, you're next." Just once I would have loved to have been at a funeral with some of those people and said the same thing!

You would have made such a good mother and with your high IQ , artistic talent and naturally blond hair(Until 24 then it turned stark white) the child would have been perfect.
Well I didn't feel like playing genetic roulette-and why have a child just to satisfy someone's curiosity.

What I love is the women who have had a number of children and blame the kids for the weight they've gained. Someone asked me how I maintain my 24 inch waist"simple no children"they look appalled! I do feel sorry for women who choose to have children-wow hormone overload and being uncomfortable!
There was an article some years ago- Ann Landers asked how many people if they could do it over would have children- 82% said they wouldn't!!

bnormal
08-07-2003, 09:11 PM
never mind

luckies4me
08-07-2003, 09:39 PM
Originally posted by Airedalekisses


What I love is the women who have had a number of children and blame the kids for the weight they've gained. Someone asked me how I maintain my 24 inch waist"simple no children"they look appalled! I do feel sorry for women who choose to have children-wow hormone overload and being uncomfortable!


Yes but what you get in return is the most precious gift ever. ;)

Luckily for me I did not gain any weight besides 17 pounds, which was baby and water. I actually weigh less now then I did before I was pregnant. I was 135 before, now I am 123. I am VERY happy lol. It made me chose to eat right, which has helped a lot. I now exercise and no longer consume Taco Bell day after day after day. My skin is smoother, I feel more energetic and happy. It has changed me for the better, and just makes me love my son even more. If only he knew how much he has changed me. :)

Kfamr
08-07-2003, 10:19 PM
I eventually want to have children.... but I can't stand them when they reach my age.:rolleyes:

CathyBogart
08-07-2003, 10:42 PM
Originally posted by luckies4me
I always hear, oh I can't beleive you aren't trying for another baby. Excuse me, but i think a few miscarriages are enough for me! I guess I am so selfish because I do not want to give Dylan a brother or sister, so he's going to be alone all his life. How sad.

Give me a break. My sons got it good! :rolleyes:

He's got a PETTING ZOO! Who needs siblings?!

luckies4me
08-07-2003, 11:08 PM
Originally posted by WolfChan
He's got a PETTING ZOO! Who needs siblings?!


LOL No kidding. We are looking into getting something new now as well. Dan wants a bird, but I really miss having guinea pigs. :p I think I am going to retire breeding ratties for a little while, until we are moved. I really want the company of another pet, especially a piggy. However Dan doesn't like piggies because they are noisy. :( :rolleyes:


So I am looking into another hedgie, possibly an albino or cinnamon. :) Or ...........Wolfchan will like this, a SNAKE! LOL

ILoveReptiles
08-08-2003, 09:15 AM
Originally posted by luckies4me
Yes but what you get in return is the most precious gift ever. ;)

Luckily for me I did not gain any weight besides 17 pounds, which was baby and water. I actually weigh less now then I did before I was pregnant. I was 135 before, now I am 123. I am VERY happy lol. It made me chose to eat right, which has helped a lot. I now exercise and no longer consume Taco Bell day after day after day. My skin is smoother, I feel more energetic and happy. It has changed me for the better, and just makes me love my son even more. If only he knew how much he has changed me. :)

Call me crazy, but none of this sounds the least bit appealing to me.

No thanks, I think I'll pass.

:rolleyes: :D

ILoveReptiles
08-08-2003, 09:17 AM
Originally posted by Airedalekisses
With me it was always at a wedding they would say , "You're next, you're next." Just once I would have loved to have been at a funeral with some of those people and said the same thing!

You would have made such a good mother and with your high IQ , artistic talent and naturally blond hair(Until 24 then it turned stark white) the child would have been perfect.
Well I didn't feel like playing genetic roulette-and why have a child just to satisfy someone's curiosity.

What I love is the women who have had a number of children and blame the kids for the weight they've gained. Someone asked me how I maintain my 24 inch waist"simple no children"they look appalled! I do feel sorry for women who choose to have children-wow hormone overload and being uncomfortable!
There was an article some years ago- Ann Landers asked how many people if they could do it over would have children- 82% said they wouldn't!!

I believe I read about that Ann Lander's survey (in the 70's) in my book "I'm Okay, You're A Brat"... and I think the correct figure was 70% out of 10,000 readers said they would NOT do it over again.

I do not regret my decision never to have children - and I never will.

slick
08-08-2003, 07:42 PM
I just have to jump in here with a true story that happened years ago.

I'm big, I've always been big and always will be. A new employee started work here as receptionist and on her second day of work she asked me when my baby was due.

Being the prankster that I am, I quickly calculated and said "November". She then said congratulations and I told her that I was quite concerned because I did not know who the baby's father was.

"My baby might be white, black or asian. I guess I'll just have to wait to find out."

Well, with that comment her mouth flew open wide and she turned around in disgust as if to say "how could I be so irresponsible...."

She still works here and I'm sure she still thinks I'm pregnant....

I love playing the game with nosey looky-loos.......

Cookiebaker
08-08-2003, 07:55 PM
ROTFL Slick!! That's hillarious!! :D

Soledad
08-08-2003, 10:03 PM
Slick that is too @#$%&*@ funny!!!!:D

ILoveReptiles
08-08-2003, 10:53 PM
*snerk* HAHAHAHA! Hilarious!

GoldenRetrLuver
08-10-2003, 12:13 AM
LOL! :D

I usally don't mind "human kids", but I would never want to have any. Just Fur- kids for me! :D

wolfsoul
08-10-2003, 03:01 AM
Haha, luckies, we're the same weight! :D LOL

I'm not by any means saying that I hate children, but there are times when I don't like them, mostly meaning my brother and my cousins. I just think that having children would be stressful for me. I plan on feeding my dogs home cooked meals, you know how much that will cost?! I can definatly not afford to have children, nor do I think I'll have the time. Of course, I still have years to think it over, settle down with someone, and maybe -- just maybe I might have a child. But it will really depend on who I'm with, if he is financially stable, if he will have the time to do stuff with the pets while I'm puking my guts out, that sort of thing. :p

DoggiesAreTheBest
08-10-2003, 06:27 AM
This thread is highly entertaining to me. Just reading about the different stories and funny remarks :)

Andrew and I have been married for 2 years now and know that we do not want children. I do not HATE children, but I do not find them appealing to me or my lifestyle. As PCB said, bad children are a result of bad parenting. But why should the public have to be inconvenienced by a child just because his/her parents are inconvenienced?

My mother gives me heck for not wanting children. She says I would make a great Mom. Having kids was very fulfilling for both my parents. But having children isn't for everyone. Call me selfish, but I do not care to have more responsibilities than I already have! I like my life as it is. I do not have the patience nor the desire. Andrew and I travel alot and have a very active lifestyle. A child would change that! Andrew and I are working hard on our careers as well. When Andrew gets out of the Army, he plans on flighing commercial airlines. A child needs to have both parents involved and we can not offer that!

Why should people have to sit in a theater and hear someone's baby crying during the movie? Get a sitter! Can't get one, stay at home. You made the choice to have the child, don't inconvenience everyone else because of it! Same thing with resturants, airplanes, malls, etc...

I grew up overseas and traveled every summer with my parents to America to visit family. My brothers and I were given meds to help us sleep on the long flights across the ocean. My mom didn't want us to bother everyone on the flight. Kids can get fidgety and annoying on a place (well behaved or not). We weren't taken to a resturant until we were old enough to behave around people and respect their right to have a peaceful meal! If we were anywhere and began to go crazy, my parents removed us and themselves from the place!

I applaud couples who want children. And just as I respect their decision to have kids, I want them to respect mine not to have any. It take lots of patience and sacrifice. But sadly, there are more bad parents than there are good. I do not mind being around children when they behave. But I don't like playing with them or hane them hanging all over me. Personal decision. I do not find them disgusting. I just don't want them on me!

As for licencing pregnancy, I vote YES!! Don't get me started on that one :D

Twisterdog
08-16-2003, 06:19 PM
LOL @ Slick!

Here's something I did similar to that. When I was pregnant with my son, I would jokingly refer to his father as the "sperm donor", as in "Oh, the sperm donor called, and we're meeting for lunch." My friends at work thought it was hilarious.

One day, this nosy lady that none of us like was stanidng near some of us and I mentioned something about "the sperm donor". Well, you could almost see her ears prick up, she was trying to hear this gossip so hard. So I elbowed one of my friends and looked in her direction. They all got it, and so we kept talking about "the sperm donor" even louder.

Sure enough, the next day, she "accidently" ran into all my friends in the halls or the bathroom and just "happened" to ask about me, and how she had never met anyone who had actually used a sperm donor, etc. One of my friends said, "You should go talk to Shanna and ask her about it, she'll be happy to tell you all about her sperm donor. Oh wait, I think she is at lunch with her husband right now." Her mouth literally dropped open.

We just messed with her head for years. Even after my son was born, we'd say something like, "Oh, I think Dylan looks just like the sperm donor, don't you?" if she was around. She would be DYING to say something, but she never did. LMAO!

Cheshirekatt
08-16-2003, 10:01 PM
I remember going to eat at a restaurent once and the hostess goes to sit us at this booth that's got a toally sticky kid, fully standing on the booth and turned around getting everything else all sticky. The kid's mom is just sitting there, ignorning him.

I ask the hostess if there's anywhere else we could sit and she snottily asks, "Well, where would you LIKE to sit?"

To which I reply, "Anywhere there isn't a sticky little kid."

:)

CathyBogart
08-17-2003, 02:30 PM
I embarassed Brian last time we went out to dinner (oops) By loudly asking "Who takes a screaming kid into a NICE restaurant where other people are paying money to enjoy themselves?" LOL! The father took the kid outside after that! Sorry Brian, but at least it worked!

I have no qualms about stating outright that I'd like to be seated as far as possible from any kids in the restaurant. :) Saves trouble later.