Poor kitty won't stop peeing on my bed, I'm at my wits end here, please help

[emkorial]

My cute little kitty cat is having problems.

I got him when I lived in my apartment, and he never had an accident the entire 2 years or so he was there.

We recently bought a house and moved in. The only place I could put the litter box was in the basement (believe me, I tried to get it placed somewhere else, and it's simply not up for debate with my fiance).

I fixed up his area nice, the basement is finished (not nicely, but finished) and it has 2 closets, I took one of the closets and lined the floor with a favorite blanket of his, used the same litterbox and litter I always have, and I keep all his toys down there, and the lights are always on. I spent time with him down there, and despite one accident, he was ok.

All is well for the next 3 months.

Fast forward to last weekend, my grandfather comes to visit with his dog. Now my cat is possibly the most timid cat in the world. So we move his litter up into our bedroom and keep him cooped up in there for a few days, letting him out when it's safe. He really didn't seem to mind all that much, since he likes the bedroom and sleeps there everynight anyway.

Grandfather leaves, litter box goes back to the basement.

Since that time, he's had 4 accidents on the bed. I checked his litter box, and he's using it, but still peeing on the bed (he pooped on there once too, but that may have been an anomaly, as he hasn't done that again.)

I changed his littier again and spent more time with him, but he did it again last night.

Everytime we wash all our sheets and comforter, and I soak the area on the mattress with lysol spray disinfectant.

But he keeps on doing it. After the last time, I checked his letter, and he had peed in there, so I know he is using his box at least some of the time.

I took him to the vet, and he checked out fine (no urinary tract problems). The vet suggested valium to help calm him down, which I'll start him on when I get back from my vacation next week.

Now even though I love this cat to death, it's not fair to me or my fiance to have to sleep in cat pee. Our bed set has been destroyed by the constand washing, and the matress is getting prety gross. I've tried yelling, shoving his nose in it, spending more time with him so he can get more comfortable in the basement, playing with him more, nothing works. I kept him locked out of the bedroom for 2 days, and now I smell cat pee throughout the rest of the house, although I searched every square inch of the place and couldn't find any pee (we have hardwood floors, and I checked all the upholstery and floor rugs by hand). I checked his litter again, and sure enough, he's using it.

If he does it one more time, I'm going to have to get rid of him.

So I'm looking for any suggestions on how to stop this, and failing that, suggestions on how to find a GOOD new home for a kitty.


Please help poor kitters.
http://www.joshuabengal.com/_dev/kittersad.jpg

Questions:

1. If I inadvertently trained him to pee in the bedroom, would locking him out of the bedroom eventually "detrain" him? He's used to sleeping in there, but I guess he could find somewhere else to sleep. although I like him sleeping with me. Any chance he could learn thats not a place to pee but a place to sleep? I'm going on vacation for a week, so he's about to go a week straight without access to the bedroom, will he get the message, or just pee as soon as he gets back in there?

2. If I have to give him up, what's the best way to get him in a good, loving home? The thing that breaks me uo is he;s such a timid cat, and it would be so hard for him to get used to another person and place, this cat is VERY dependant and loyal to me.

[momofcats]

Your situation sounds almost exactly like mine...even to the location of the litter box. My cat(s) are not urinating on the bed, but on the carpeting and curtains in my office. I posted the question for help a few days back.

We are tearing up the carpeting this weekend and putting in Pergo floors...hopefully that will help but my husband will not have that much tolerance to this situation.

I just wanted to wish you the best and remember, like I am trying, that these moves (when all medical reasons have been ruled out) sometimes upset the cat causing changes in their behavior and isolating them out of rooms during this adjustment period may be in their best interest.

[Barbara]

There have been many threads here about that problem. It was good that you took your cat to the vet. In many cases they have an Urine Tract Infection (UTI) which can be cured by medicine.
If not then it must be a behavioral thing and anything from moving to getting a new cat can influence it. Did you change the litter brand? Is the box always clean? There are cats that use the box only one time ( I have 2 of them).

Can you put a second litterbox close to the bed (for some time) and slowly move it away to a place where it can stay? I even would think of checking with another vet.

Do you use a closed litterbox? Try an open one -with Filou that helped. It could also be the other way round. It can take some time to find out but there will be a solution. Good luck. Your cat is a handsome guy and it would not be helpful to give him away.

Ah: I found another thread about litterbox problems:

http://petoftheday.com/talk/showthread.php?s=&threadid=24170&highlight=pee

[jenluckenbach]

When the cat was checked for a UTI was he tested for other ailments. My Diabtic cat did this prior to his diagnosis. (pee inapropriately AND in his box)

Since his box WAS in the bedroom for a while, could you place it back there just to test whether he'd use it over the bed? After all, having the litter box in the bedroom MUST be better than a urine soaked bed (even to you fiance)

I know this isn't a whole lot of help. I wish you luck.

[Cataholic]

WOW...you move, put the litter box far away....then, have a dog come over, and then move the litter box again, and then again...and you wonder why your kitty is peeing in the bed?

If you stop and think about what is going on, from a cat's perspective...it becomes more clear. He is simply confused. The problem is more yours than his. You will need to retrain him. Keep him confined to the basement for a majority of the time, until he gets REALLY comfortable with his box being there. Work on removing all the smells/evidence you can from your room.....then, let him up again.

Shoving his nose in it? Yelling at him? Oh, how sad. These are tactics that simply won't work, and really only make the problem worse. Please don't do these things to your kitty...he just doesn't understand!

It would be so sad to rehome this kitty. I think if you work on it, from his perspective, it will work out. Please keep trying!!

[IttyBittyKitty]

If you do, his problems will just go with him, and he'll have a lot of difficulty finding a forever home. The reality is, he will probably be put down.

Please, please give him another chance. Have you tried banning him from the bedroom? He probably isn't doing it anywhere else ... it would be the smell of pee permeating the house.

Also examine the litter problem ... have you changed trays, brands or deodorisers recently? We tried a new brand of litter made from recycled paper and our adorable kitty pooped on the floor! It could be something like this, but it sounds more like your cat has a psychological issue. Make sure you give your kitty heaps and heaps of love and cuddles. Monitor his use of the litter tray, and give him a pat and a treat when you see him using it. Persuade your fiance to allow you to keep the litter somewhere else. Is there tension in your relationship? That can make the problem worse. Cats are very intituitve and pick up on underlying currents of tension. When my Mother and her fiance broke up, all four cats started peeing everywhere. Mum's cat, Whiskey, even peed on his DVD collection!

Don't let your fiance boss you about. Don't let him tell you to give away your pet. Personally, if it were me, I wouldn't marry someone who forced me to give up my cat. It means more than simply my love for my cat - you have a responsibility for that pet. If he cannot understand that, I would be questioning his moral integrity. But, that's just me.

[Karen]

I think that you do need to "retrain" him. I would "ban" him from the bedroom except when you are there and awake to prevent "accidents."

He's obviously a little confused and upset - his world has changed rather dramatically several times recently. He is neutered, right? If not, he could be "marking" territory, claiming the bed as his?

If his litterbox is going to be in the basement, I guess he needs to sleep in the basement, at least for now. What is going to happen when you are on vacation?

You could, by the way, to "save" your mattress, buy a waterproof mattress cover, they have them for incontinent adults. That way it's just the sheets that "get it" and not the mattress. This isn't a permanent solution, but it might help until life settles down for your poor confused cat!

[emily_the_spoiled]

I went through something very similar when I first got Emily. It took alot of time and patience, but she hasn't had an "accident" in quite awhile. I even managed to introduce a second cat into the household without problems. I am including a link to a website that can offer many suggestions to help your cat.

http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Plains/1151/houstrng.htm

Before giving him away you might want to try medication (e.g. kitty prozac). For many cats that can't be re-trained this is a viable option. Although you first option should be to attempt to re-train him.

Good luck

[Adge Gibbs]

Originally posted by IttyBittyKitty

Don't let your fiance boss you about. Don't let him tell you to give away your pet. Personally, if it were me, I wouldn't marry someone who forced me to give up my cat. It means more than simply my love for my cat - you have a responsibility for that pet. If he cannot understand that, I would be questioning his moral integrity. But, that's just me.

His fiance is a her ;)

I sent him to Pet Talk to help him with this issue. We frequent the same tech site and the advice there was less than stellar. I told him that all of you could offer much better advice and I'm glad you could give him some pointers.

I haven't seen an update in either thread (here or there), but hopefully things worked out for him and the cat.

[allfun_1]

Just a reccomendation - our sweet kitty is a priss when it comes to his litterbox. If you come in the room he gets miffed - but when he was about a year old he went potty on the bed and Then did it again 3 days later. The vet gave me a Pheromone spray that you spray over the cleaned are and the cat will not smell himself there any more - As I recall it was pricey but - it has lasted quite a while and the problem stopped. Good luck - our boy is a doll except that he is a small boy who goes to the bathroom a lot and cannot stand his littebox to be slightly dirty. - but now he doesn't use the bed.

[emkorial]

Update:

Well, I just got back from a weeks vacation. I had the bedroom door closed the whole time, so Kit's couldn't get in. No accedients anywhere else in the house.

I tried the kitty valium, but all it seemed to do was reduce his motor coordination, he still meowed just as much, was just as energetic, but he couldn;t walk or run well and fell over a lot. So I discontinued using that.

I got a biological cleaner, cleaned all the sheets/comforter, soaked the matress in the stuff, and still kept him out of the room for the last few days.

I took his cat bed out of the basement, and put it up in my room. He'll never stop screaming to come in the bedroom with me, but as long as he doesn;t pee on the bed, he's more than welcome. So my current thinking is I've prolly broken him of the peeing habit, but I also want to keep him off the bed, and in his bed to sleep. So this morning, I let him in the bedroom, he poked around a bit, and tried to get up on the bed 2 times, both of which I pushed him away. A few minutes go by, I look out on the floor, and there he is, curled up and sleeping in his bed. Yay!

So tonight I think will be the first test of sleeping in the bedroom. Wish me luck!

[emily_the_spoiled]

Congratulations :D :D :D

So far so good, I sure hope Kit keeps up the good work!!! We will keep our fingers and paws crossed for you...

[emkorial]

well, 2 more days, 2 more nonaccidents...

[mec407]

In the future, please don't yell at him or rub his nose in the pee/poop/vomit/whatever if he has an accident. Those "remedies" do not work and are just old wives tales. What they actually do is make your cat afraid of you. :(

To get the pee odor out of the bed, try one of the more specialized products made specifically for removing pet odors. There are certain things in cat urine that can not be removed by conventional products such as Lysol. Even if the smell seems to be gone, your cat may still be able to smell it. I believe there is a product called NillOdor that is made specifically for pet stains/odors.

Best of luck, and please don't give up!

[moosmom]

You got some GREAT advice here and it seems to be working. Cats do not take well to change. Like Cataholic said, with all the changes that were made, it's no wonder he was confused!!

Two suggestions for the odor. Nature's Remedy is wonderful at getting out urine odors. My cat (RB, Casey) had at UTI and proceeded to let me know by peeing on my mattress. I bought the Nature's Remedy and literally soaked the spot with it (it was a soft side water bed). When the stuff dried, the odor was gone.

Another product that I absolutely SWEAR by is Nok-Out. You can order it online. I always buy as gallon of it. It literally wipes out any odor there is. It has no scent to it so it's not like Glade where is masks the odor. It totally eliminates it. I use it for my cat bedding and spray it full strength in the air when I clean the cat boxes.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. And like everyone says, PLEASE, PLEASE don't yell, hit or rub your cats nose in it for something that isn't his fault.

[Running Wolf]

I had my Ember squat and pee on the dirty clothes in the bathroom (right in front of me while I was on the can). She had peed on the clothes maybe once or twice before.

I grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and stuck her nose in where she peed and screamed at her. I got my arm all clawed up. I wasn't out to hurt her just hold her in place to know what she did was wrong. I'd rather hurt myself than hurt my fuzzy friend.

Ember loved to sit in the bathroom window and watch the people in the park lot. I locked her out of the bathroom for a week, I also totally ignored her for a week..... As she is an attention fiend that really bummed her out the most.
She hasn't peed any place but her litter box since then.

[heidipacher]

In reply to the peeing outside the box, I've been going through this with one cat for 2.5 years now.

I live in my grandmother's place. She moved out 3 years ago and took her cat. The place smelled, but it was difficult to tell the cause, as grandma had fallen and soiled herself more than once. She moved out and lived in a retirement home for 6 months with her cat who had no problems there.

Grandma passed away and then the cat come live with me back in his old place. Before I moved in, we had the carpet replaced and floors sealed. However, most of my grandmothers things were gone and I had a new cat, a male. The other cat had peed, marking carpet, especially if I was gone overnight. Soon the two had marked every corner of every room. The other cat died last October and grandma's cat settled down, but continued to poop and pee on carpet. He has occasionally sprayed grandma's furniture too. Gross.

I use a carpet cleaner regularly, enzyme spray, carpet deoderizer powder, etc. I've used feliway, but it is expensive and hard to keep up.

I've spent a lot of time consulting with my vet. Cat took buspar for months, for anxiety when he came home. I put him on it again recently when I adopted another cat. He has sinced calmed down.

Both cats go out, I let this one out in the morning and evening and all day when I am home and no problems occur when he goes out. Both cats have their own litterboxes and food dishes. Got new uncovered litterboxes, and I buy news ones at least 1x year.

He seems pretty happy, but does have other odd behavior (long story, I taped it and the vet viewed it and sent it off to consultants). He follows me whenever I go out and walks with me like hes a dog.

But anyway, I think I have found something that works-plug ins that contain feline facial pheromone. I saw a cheesy ad in a magazine and searched all over Seattle to find them. One full component costs $40.00 with refills of $20.00. Farnam pets has a website with coupons and locations. I bought mine at Petco

I have had one plugged in as an experiment and no problems as of yet in the room where it is plugged. It is supposed to help cats relax.

I agree that rubbing noses does not work. It serves to teach the cat to fear you and reminds them where they peed.

I contained my cat in a bathroom to retrain him to use the litterbox. gave him toys, food, water, light, litter, and he tore up the toilet paper. Oh well. He now uses the litterbox and may still pee on the carpet.

I figure the cost of the plug ins, if they work, is well worth it. I would rather not fuss every night in the dark with a black light. To the fiance who wants the litterbox in the basement I have this message: get over it. Cats pee in their teritory. Are you going to move your bathroom to the backyard?

It really sucks to be stepping in litter when I get out of the shower, but it has helped to put a box in each bathroom for the cats to use.

I would also never get rid of the cat. I don't regret anything. I've taken care of my grandmothers cat and will continue to til his time comes. I've adopted 4 cats in the past 10 years from people who gave them up (aside from gram). I work as a social worker and will just not give up on them!

we need people who are committed to caring for pets properly and are not giving up on them because they've got a problem. Imagine what they think of us!!

[Running Wolf]

Just a side note to what you said about getting rid of a cat because of an S.O. reminded me of what a friend of mine said about his (now passed away) dog. He had said something to the effect of “In the past 7 years I’ve had one dog and about 5 women in my life. The dog was better company and friendship than all of the women put together.”

When I was looking for an apartment someone was stupid enough to ask me if the place had to take cats! My reply was that I would rather be celibate than give up my cat.

Amazing what people who don’t have pets think…. Same type of morons who say something along the lines of “you can always get another cat/dog/ect” when your fuzzy buddy passes on. Pets are like family (sometimes better than family as they truly offer unconditional love) and I dare say the people who say what I said above would never tell a person that “oh you can always remarry.” “You can always have another child.” Or other such harsh remark in the face of a personal loss.

[heidipacher]

Running wolf you are right. I took in three cats that people gave up and the one after my grandmother died. Tow of the cats were given up by people who cited allergies. The most recent one was a man who had his daughter's cat and his new girlfriend was moving in and allergic.

Whatever. Thats what they make zyrtec for!

It only matters how much we value the animals. We see them as family members, others see them as property or work or something else.

[Running Wolf]

Know what you mean. I am slightly allergic to cats and refuse to take one of those once a day allergy pills (I don’t suffer from them everyday so I am not going to take a pill everyday). The only way cats get my allergies kicked into gear is if I stick my face right next to them when I am petting them (no clue if it is the dander or hair)….

… But I’d rather sneeze for an hour and have itchy eyes than not have my little alien pod creature (at this point I know she is not a cat ;) ). Ember and me have been putting up with each other longer than my ex wife and me were married. I don’t miss the ex wife but if I go away for a weekend I miss Ember coming up and bugging me for some pettings when I am trying to get some sleep.