Dear Phred...

[Edwina's Secretary]

I went to the grocery store to try and find something for Elizabeth (that the raccoons won't eat.) I was looking at the sardines --- (do you know how many kinds of sardines there are!!!! And I've never eaten ONE!!!)

Anyway...sure enough I found clam juice. It was in the juice section. It is surprisingly low in sodium so I bought some to have on hand in case I ever need to get Edwina to drink.

Seems easier than draining a can of tuna! :D :D

[Cataholic]

Interesting. I have some clam juice for this recipe that I never did end up making...can you just give it to them like a little bit of milk? Will they eat clams? I have two cans of clams, to go with the clam juice..all using up cupboard space. If it would make a wonderful treat for the babies, I might do it!

[Randi]

Are these the ones you mean, Sara? Or the smaller round ones?

http://www.karoline.dk/user_graphics/220Muslingesuppemedoesters.jpg

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi
Are these the ones you mean, Sara?
http://www.karoline.dk/user_graphics/220Muslingesuppemedoesters.jpg

Dad sed :eek: ~
Jest affore he turned a phunnie *green* color...
We dont think he'z a klam fancier...

He sez he axkt atta store fur klam juice anna klerk gave him a phunnie look...
He took that for a "no" and quit lookin.

We'll send him into a Big store next tyme.
Then he <mumbel'd> sumpin bout the klam juice better not *stink* or the juice anna Kat would boff be onna frunt porch! :rolleyes:

[Edwina's Secretary]

I'm not real good at sea things :D :D :D . The juice comes in a bottle. I have seen recipes that said "clam juice" so I looked for it at the grocery. The bottle says something about...for use when you need authentic fish flavor (not sure when that would be???? but I'm not much of a cook...) It was next to the other juices that don't need refrigeration...like grape juice!

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
I'm not real good at sea things :D :D :D .
...but I'm not much of a cook...)

:D

You an Dad have Two things in common :rolleyes:.

We'll send him back inna store - an tell him to try lookin wiffa eyeballz *open* this tyme.

;)

[momoffuzzyfaces]

I feel kinda green along with Phred. I've seen a juice called Clamato here. It's a combanation of clam juice and tomato juice. It sounded awful to me but I'm not a sea food lover anyway. I don't think I've ever seen clam juice alone. If you give it a go Phred, let us know how Bootz likes it and if it smells. I'll keep an eye out for it, just in case I have to 'water' one of the boys.:D

[Randi]

I can assure you that if you make a dish using anchovies, your cats will go crazy! Here's a few recipees with them.

Sorry, they disappeared, but you can find them! ;)

http://recipes.sainsburys.co.uk/recipe/search/default.htm

http://recipes.sainsburys.co.uk/

http://seafood.allrecipes.com/directory/1551.asp

Or you can try Olives with anchovies in the middle! They are really tasty! - Just ask Nita, Sirocco, Nelix and Fister! :D

[toughCookie]

ok who is Phred? I have seen this name mentioned before.

[Miss Meow]

Originally posted by Randi
Or you can try Olives with anchovies in the middle! They are really tasty! - Just ask Nita, Sirocco, Nelix and Fister! :D

Yum! We had pasta with tomatoes, olives with anchovies and chilli - delicious!

I haven't seen clam juice over here. Look forward to whoever tries it out first!

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi
Or you can try Olives with anchovies in the middle!
:eek:

Dad sez < :eek: >!

"Why wood ya wanna ruin 2 gud Olivez by jammin a
*ded phish* inna midel??"

Dad thinks wun lil ded Anchovie kan rek a WHOLE Pizza!

We dont think da Kat is EBBER gonna see an Anchovie!

:rolleyes:

[gini]

I have to laugh at this thread...........coming from Ohio I never even saw a fish - until I moved to California. Well, maybe a trout or two my Dad caught.........and we never, ever had fish for dinner. (I am from a meat and potatos family..rice? what was that?)


But I am right up there with you all about anchovies.........those hairy little buggers - why oh why would you even think of eating one?

[Randi]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke

Why wood ya wanna ruin 2 gud Olivez by jammin a
*ded phish* inna midel??"

Dad thinks wun lil ded Anchovie kan rek a WHOLE Pizza!

We dont think da Kat is EBBER gonna see an Anchovie! :rolleyes:
LOL! :D I hate anchoves myself, but a tiny lil bit in the middle of an olive is yummy! Gotta get the spanish ones, though! ;)

I had invited some friends over for dinner a few weeks back and they wanted to know where I'd bought these olives - so I told them. The next time I went to the Cheese shop where I got them, the owner said: Someone came in yesterday and bought the 10 cans I had! Arrgghh!! - So I'll have to wait for the next delivery. :rolleyes:

[Edwina's Secretary]

Even though we didn't eat meat on Friday when I was young I did NOT eat any type of fish until I was 30 years old! (My poor mother -- eggs, cheese, pastas -- she was so creative!)

A friend finally convinced me to try white fish and I liked it! But anchovies, clams, oysters, tuna....I'm turning green too.

[Logan]

Isn't this funny? I didn't know anyone didn't like seafood!!! I could live off of it....but no anchovies, please, and I am not a big clam fan either (found that out when we were in Massachusetts last summer). But an oyster, fish, shrimp, scallops.....YUM!!!!!! :D

Happy dining, Boots. I'll bet you will love your clam juice if your dad can stomach the smell!!! :p

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Logan
Happy dining, Boots.
I'll bet you will love your clam juice...
if your dad can stomach the smell!!! :p

:eek: Uhh-Oohhhh...
Houston; We think there's gonna be a problem here... :rolleyes:

Klamz STINK?? :eek:
Hope Dad duzint reed that!

We might be back wiff eetin a lotta Mack 'n Cheeze 'n Tuna - he can handel da Tuna odor. Do they put Skratch an Sniff labelz on the Klam Juice jugz?

Kat prolly won't like :( havin ta skratch onna frunt door to be let out onna porch ta get a drinka Klam Waddur.

[Logan]

Ha Ha!!! I'm assuming that if it is used to add "fish flavor" to your cooking, it will probably be pretty fishy smelling too!! Who in the world would want to make something smell fishy???? :eek:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Logan
Ha Ha!!! I'm assuming that if it is used to add "fish flavor" to your cooking, it will probably be pretty fishy smelling too!! Who in the world would want to make something smell fishy???? :eek:
LOL!!! People who are trying to get certain cats to drink water?:D

[gini]

This is turning out to be a very "fishy" thread and it should be locked! We are offended by your comments!

Signed

Charlie Tuna
Sally Salmon
Ollie Oyster
Casper Catfish
Lily Lobster
Tucker Trout
and last but not least...........

Clayton Clam

[Edwina's Secretary]

You mean we should............CLAM UP???????

:D :rolleyes: :D :rolleyes: :D :rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

SPEAKING OF CLAMS....
How do they know clams are happy? as in 'Happy as a clam?' I've never seen one I could tell if it was happy or not.:eek: :D

By the way:
I have 4 cats who would like to eat er meet all of you fishie critters who are offended by this thread. They offer an open invatation to dine with them at the meal of your choice.:D

[gini]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
SPEAKING OF CLAMS....
How do they know clams are happy? as in 'Happy as a clam?' I've never seen one I could tell if it was happy or not.



Well, now you have done it! You made me look that up on Google......and here is what it says............

The original quotation is from Colonial times and it read.........

"Happy as a clam at high tide." Eventually the "high tide" part was dropped. Guess they were happy because they couldn't be caught at high tide.

And however kind your invitation might be.......Clayton Clam will not be coming over for dinner! But Charlie Tuna just doesn't get it and he will probably show up!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Thanks for the clam info. I always wondered about that....

Charlie Tuna is welcome anytime. He and his family are big favorites here.:D

[Logan]

LOL!!! You guys crack me up!!!! :D

[emily_the_spoiled]

Hey Cinder and Smoke,

Dad may have turned a funny green when looking at Randi's picture because the black things in the bowl are actually mussels and the things on the table are oysters (and they look raw).

The mussels are yummy, but it was probably a good thing he turned green with the oysters ;)

But all you fishy friends are more than welcome to come for supper with me and Mom :D :D :D

Emily


http://www.karoline.dk/user_graphics/220Muslingesuppemedoesters.jpg

[zippy-kat]

WELL GOOD COD!!
Whuteva happened to plain' ol' chikin broth? all this fish talk is makin' me a lil' ill!

Aw what the heck Phred, give the poor cat some clam juice.... do it just for the halibut!

[gini]

I am "floundering" here for something to say. Edwina was right, I should just "clam up."

[Randi]

Who are all these people musseling in on our thread? ;)
It’s a bit shellfish of them.
Hope to sea you all later! :D

john

[Edwina's Secretary]

Not to skate on thin ice, but I think I'm going hard of herring! I'll just trout on out of here.....

[Logan]

:D :D :D

[gini]

Originally posted by Randi
Who are all these people musseling in on our thread? ;)

john

Just some urchins.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini


Just some urchins.
I'm just a shrimp myself.:D

[gini]

Of course, it could have been some sea enemies :) :)

[AmberLee]

So much for sneaking in here inconspicuously while at work. I'm making an absolute fool of myself snorting and howling... ROTFLOL!

It's a whale of a tale, is all I can say. You all otter be writing professionally.

[gini]

You know, this thread is supposed to be about Phred and getting some clam juice for Boots.

Guess we made Phred go into his SHELL :p :p

[Logan]

Hehehe!!!!!

Oh, I'm sure eel be right back, Gini, and we'll all be tuna in to see what he has to say about those oysters and the clam juice. :rolleyes:

[Cinder & Smoke]

Holy Mackerel ~

This topic is goin to the Dog Fish. :p

We're wunderin if da Kat wood like Catfish insteadda Klam?

Sorrie - weez jest lil Shrimp when it comes to makin punz.

We duzint wanna akt like a Crab :( an complain.

Phish yoke:
Whut did da phish say when he swam into da concrete wall?

**Dam!*

:D

[gini]

What a fine kettle of fish you got us into Phred.

[toughCookie]

zippy cat and Edwina's secretary, you guys are FUNNY!

still, I don't know, who is Phred????

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by toughCookie
still, I don't know, who is Phred????

He'z da lil FiurFiter inna korner -----------------------------v

[zippy-kat]

i'm still feeling eel.... someone might wanna call a sturgeon!! I think Sophie sensed this... sushi climbed up on my lap and now we're just bein' cuttlefish!

[lbaker]

OH MY COD this is tuna mush:rolleyes: Back to clam juice.... I have tried "phony abalone" by soaking chicken filets in clam juice for awhile then saute or poach. delish! (that is for those of us that like seafood) The only seafood I can't abide is anchovies. I even like calimari (octopus)and sushi. I've seen jellyfish :eek: on a Chinese menu but haven't had the nerve to try it.
Laurie
p.s. Forgot to mention, next to cheese popcorn my cats favorite treat in the world is CRAB GUTS :eek: while we are picking crabs:D

[Randi]

A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.

[wayne0214]

Maybe some of us should see an ophthalmosaurus!

[Randi]

Yes, toughCookie, it is a bit of a mystery, who IS this guy Phred? Does he really exist? Has anyone ever seen a picture of him? Is there any tangible evidence? Or is he just a figment of our imagination? Have we any proof at all that he exists? All we’ve ever read was written by Boots or the dogs!


http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid35/p55fbb0de5109739fe91d7424c9122550/fd2fb411.jpg

john

[lbaker]

oh Phred is real alright, he just hangs out with Lamont Cranston most of the time ;) Laurie

[Edwina's Secretary]

...so he is not a phantastic fantom?????

(Hard to stop once you get started....)

[lbaker]

:D :D :D i didn't know anyone here was old enough to know who lamont cranston was:rolleyes: very good one E's sec'y:p

[gini]

It is going to be really interesting to see how many people on Pet Talk know who Lamont Cranston is...............thanks, Laurie, I haven't thought about him for years!

Oops, you were posting just as I was.............

[Cinder & Smoke]

:cool: The Shadow... (http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Zone/1551/shadow1.html) :cool:

mug shot... Phred, in disguise?? (http://www.alpc.com/Digital/lamont.htm)

:rolleyes:

[gini]

Only The Shadow knows!!

[lbaker]

...................what goofyness lurks in the hearts of [petTalkers] :rolleyes:

[gini]

Hey, The Shadow was serious stuff - especially when you were a kid! You bought into the whole thing!:) :)

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Any minnow now, I hope to figure out what everyone is talking about. Who or what is a lamont cranston? :D

[Cinder & Smoke]

MOFF!

Klik here ----v


:cool: The Shadow... (http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Zone/1551/shadow1.html) :cool:

mug shot... Phred, in disguise?? (http://www.alpc.com/Digital/lamont.htm)

:rolleyes:

[lbaker]

every show would open up with this really creepy, deep voice saying "who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of man....." then an even creepier reply........."the Shadow knows"........then this Reeeeeeealy creepy evil laugh:eek: even thinking about it can make the "fur" go up on the back of my neck ;)

The man's face was ashen. A whispered laugh came from The Shadow's lips.

Only The Shadow knew why the sight of his dread face had brought terror to this evil fiend who never before to-night had known fear.

The face of The Shadow! The face that was never seen except when disguised to represent some other countenance. :eek: :eek:

Laurie

[gini]

And wasn't it all wonderful? Ahhh, those were the days!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

AHHHH, now I know. I remember the hearing about the Shadow. It was before I could read ... that's why I didn't connect the name...plus my folks wouldn't let me watch...which didn't stop me but sure slowed me down. I somehow thought it was a radio program. The old memory is the first to go.:D

[lbaker]

".............then the Shadow brought something out from under his cloak................it was horrible:eek: they shrank back with loathing and fear :eek: their hearts were pounding - they couldn't even scream:eek: :eek: ARRRRRRRGH oh no! anything....anything.....but not...OH NO look out Phred, look out ZippyKat - IT IS...
.
.
.................



CLAM JUICE!!!"

[gini]

Just tooooo funny!!:) :)

[gini]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
. I somehow thought it was a radio program. The old memory is the first to go.:D

Oh, but it was a radio show.........first before TV..............

Today us oldsters have moved forward with our walkers and our wheel chairs - cranked up the memory with some prune juice -
and we are sharing them with you!

When Phred says "older than dirt" - what can I say? I resemble that remark!;) ;)

[Logan]

:D to Gini!!!!!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini

When Phred says "older than dirt" - what can I say? I resemble that remark!;) ;)
Me too, Gini. Me too. We may be oldies but are still goodies.:D

[Edwina's Secretary]

Me too, Gini. Me too. We may be oldies but are still goodies

Like a fine wine....I am finer...not older


cranked up the memory with some prune juice -

Stay with us...the theme is CLAM juice not prune juice


...so he is not a phantastic fantom?????

dare I admit this????? I was just kidding around phonetically!!! I rememeber the Shadow...sort of...hazy....distant...

[tatsxxx11]

OK, I know Phred, I know clams, I love clams; even Clamato juice. But I don't know Lamont Cranston:rolleyes: Must be a geography thing; or is it an age thing? Or, is it a seafood thing? Oh, I forgot, we're talking prunes now! THAT'S definitely an age thing:D I think I'm confused:confused:

[tatsxxx11]

OH..............NOW I know who knows!! The SHADOW knows!:D

[gini]

DEAR PHRED:

URGENT!!!

DO NOT GIVE BOOTS PRUNE JUICE!! (YOU AND BOOTS WOULD BE VERY SORRY!!).

PLEASE, HOWEVER, TRY CLAM JUICE!

BUT I BETCHA EVEN THE SHADOW KNEW THAT!!

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by gini
URGENT!!!

DO NOT GIVE BOOTS PRUNE JUICE!!
(YOU AND BOOTS WOULD BE VERY SORRY!!)


Roger!...
On the Negative on the Prune Juice!

Prunez, Klamz, Krabz, Phish, Shell Phish, Shadowz,
Radioz...

Dis iz all startin ta get :confused: konfuzin! :p

[gini]

Gosh, sitting around a table - having some crabs, some clams, other shellfish, fish, listening to the SHADOW on the radio doesn't sound too bad to me.

Could we substitute a beer for that prune juice though?

[zippy-kat]

*smacks gum, twirls (blonde) hair* you guys lost me on the shadow thing .... :rolleyes: ;)

All I can say is, keep FISHIN' for the answer.... and you'll soon know who Phred is!

[Randi]

Is this really the sort of guy we’re talking about here? Surely this isn’t typical of our Phred?

Example:
MARGOT : Oh, God I dreamed.
LAMONT : So did I. What did you dream?
MARGOT : I was lying naked on a beach in the South Seas. The tide was coming up to my toes. The sun was moving down. My skin hot and cool at the same time. It was wonderful. What was yours?
LAMONT : I dreamed I tore all the skin off my face and was somebody else underneath.
MARGOT : You have problems.
LAMONT : I'm aware of that.

NEWS FLASH!
"And finally, in the news, a local doctor pleas for a prominent patient to come see him. Dr. Mark LeGrand, Chief Surgeon at Mercy General Hospital, claims that The Shadow forced his way into his home last night and ordered him to remove a bullet (or claw?) from his arm. Dr. LeGrand says he operated on the mysterious man, but when he tried to call the hospital to reserve a room for his patient, The Shadow disappeared. Dr. LeGrand says The Shadow's life is in grave danger and begs him to return for further treatment with the promise that he will not notify the police if he does. And now, the weather..."

... OR COULD IT BE THAT THE SHADOW
IS REALLY BOOTS THE CAT!

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid35/p14348b37668ce25f05bd27665caca5a5/fd2edea5.jpg
This is probably what Phred is thinking
at the moment!

john

[lbaker]

oh dear
i fear
we just may be running
AMOK :eek:
............and it started out so innocently;)
who wudda thunk:rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by lbaker
oh dear
i fear
we just may be running
AMOK :eek:
............and it started out so innocently;)
who wudda thunk:rolleyes:
We wouldn't think of running AMOK. We are as good as gold - fish.:D

[lbaker]

"....... and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles...

....whatever we lose(like a you or a me)
it's always ourselves we find in the sea"

i guess phred wouldn't know about such things - not much ocean in ohio

:p

[Edwina's Secretary]

Let's see if I can pull this thread together.....get to the sole of the matter so to speak.....

Phred, who is green and wears a black cape and hat, is underneath the Shadow really Boots the Cat...who likes beer but not prune juice and HATES clam juice as well as creatures without feet except when they are tunaed into the radio on a beach in the South Seas which is a long way from Ohio.

What a kettle of fish this has become! And poor toughCookie is still swimming upstream -- who is this fishy Phred again???

[lbaker]

...........that's about it in a clam shell

tunaed in tomorrow for the next exciting adventure boys and girls, right after we study our reeling and writhing

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
the Shadow really Boots the Cat...who likes beer but not prune juice and HATES clam juice
Acctually, I don't think it's been determined yet if Boots likes clam juice or prune juice either, for that matter. Maybe it's the clams who like the prune juice. Just what we need, a bunch of clams with diarrhea, which may explain why they are happy in high tide. It washes them clean.:D

[gini]

You know, Sara, if you hadn't found that lousy clam juice in the store - and started this thread we wouldn't be in this mess.

Karen is probably rolling her eyes. Phred has disappeared - well, he is the SHADOW so I guess he can do that. People are out there buying prune juice for their cats when they should be getting them a beer!

I am just going to trout on out of here before I get into even more trouble.

[Logan]

Originally posted by gini
You know, Sara, if you hadn't found that lousy clam juice in the store - and started this thread we wouldn't be in this mess.

Karen is probably rolling her eyes. Phred has disappeared - well, he is the SHADOW so I guess he can do that. People are out there buying prune juice for their cats when they should be getting them a beer!

I am just going to trout on out of here before I get into even more trouble.

LOL at Gini!!! :D :D :D

[Randi]

Spaghetti with Clams, Garlic, Tomato and Parsley

Prep and cook time: Up to 30 mins

Serves: 4

Ingredients
400g (14oz) spaghetti
2.7kg (6lb) small clams, washed
4 garlic cloves, finely chopped
4 tomatoes skinned, seeded and chopped
1 bunch fresh flat-leaf parsley, finely chopped
4 tbsp olive oil
3 dried red chillies, crumbled
85ml (2 1/2fl oz) white wine
salt and black pepper
3 lemons cut into quarters

Method
Heat the olive oil in a large pan, add the garlic and cook for a minute.

Add the chilli and the clams, cover with a lid and cook for 2/3 minutes until open, remove the clams. Remove any unopened ones and remove half of the clams from their shells.

Add the wine to the juices remaining in the pan and reduce by 3/4 minutes. Add half the parsley and all the clams back into the sauce.

Cook the spaghetti in boiling salted water, drain and add to the clam sauce, add the tomato and serve with the remaining parsley and lemon quarters.

..... getting hungry Phred? :D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi
Spaghetti with Clams, Garlic, Tomato and Parsley
Prep and cook time: Up to 30 mins = Uh-Oh; problem #1
Serves: 4 = GOOD! 2 Dawgs, 1 Kat, +Dad :)

Ingredients...
2.7kg (6lb) small :eek: clams :eek:, washed

and there wuz MAJOR Problem #2! :(

..... getting hungry Phred? :D

Nice try, Miz Randi - but you don knowe Dad like WE do! :rolleyes:

Problemo #1 ~
30 minnitz inna kitchen is bout 20 too mennie fur Dad... Iffin he kant Nuke it in less than 5 - It aint gonna happen!
Fancee meal fur him is Skagetee in wun pot, Jar a store-bot sauce an sum frozen meaty-ballz in anudder pot... 10 minnitz flat an he'z gobblin! :rolleyes:

An Problemo #2 ~
He keepz <mumblin> "WHY wood ennebuddie wanta rek a purfektly gud bowl a skagettee by tossin a buncha Ded KLAMZ in there!???"

[gini]

Miz Sophie thanks you for the recipe..............however, she eliminated everything except the PARSLEY:) :)

[auggie]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
Let's see if I can pull this thread together.....get to the sole of the matter so to speak.....

Phred, who is green and wears a black cape and hat, is underneath the Shadow really Boots the Cat...who likes beer but not prune juice and HATES clam juice as well as creatures without feet except when they are tunaed into the radio on a beach in the South Seas which is a long way from Ohio.

What a kettle of fish this has become! And poor toughCookie is still swimming upstream -- who is this fishy Phred again???

ROTFL!!!:D You guys are hilarious!! I'm in tears from laughing so hard. Poor "toughCookie" must be totally confused.
So here, toughCookie, just for you,
a picture of Phred:

[zippy-kat]

THE
http://www.bright.net/~horses/stallions/Image16.gif
WHODUNIT CONCLUSION
(Whodunit and whodunit conclusion are both names of horses)


PHRED (http://petoftheday.com/talk/member.php?action=getinfo&userid=714)

[Cinder & Smoke]

:D Auggie ~

Summa Dad's FireGuyz prolly would have agreed
with that pix a few years ago!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

LOL!!! Auggie loved the picture. Zippy are you trying to confuse me again on porpoise?:eek: :D

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

You guys are just tuna funny! I wish I cod participate, halibut the boss is calling. :D :) :D

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom
the boss is calling. :D :) :D
Abalone; bosses can be so unreasonable.
(Abalone is pronounced ah-baloney in my family):D

[koxka]

Who was speaking about Halibut?

Finding new ways to use fish's juice :p

http://images.ucomics.com/comics/tmcat/2002/tmcat021010.gif

[Randi]

It's so quiet here ..... has everybody gone fishing?? :D

Or am I out of my depth?

[Freckles]

Nobody biting, that's for sure!:D

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Eel bet they are still lure-king around.:D

[gini]

Aww, you reeled me right in!

[Cinder & Smoke]

Well; We gotz Klam Juice now... :rolleyes:

Dad wuz reedin da label aftur he got back inna kar. Thunk da stuff looked like waddur till he red da part dat sed "Shake Well". He "Shook Well" an almos passed :eek: out! Buncha stuff floated offa bottom an it turned :eek: grey or green...

Now he sez it "Looks like it'z gonna *stink*."
He'll prolly set it down aside Bootsy's waddur kup an tella Kat to "Pop da Top" hizelf! :rolleyes:

Hevun Help us all iffin it DOES *stink*!! :p

Hooze Ideer wuz this stuff, enniehow??
Stuff won't give a Kat *GASS* willit??

Wunder if *Klam F@rtz* s-t-i-n-k ??

Whut'cha wanna bet he triez the stuff out onna Kat tumorrow ~
While he an SmokeMutt are safe onna trip ta visit GranMom!?

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke
Well; We gotz Klam Juice now... :rolleyes:

Stuff won't give a Kat *GASS* willit??

Wunder if *Klam F@rtz* s-t-i-n-k ??
I'd go easy on that stuff or it may make Boots do more than F@rtz. The floaty stuff is squished clams. I'd even be tempted to add more water or just add a spoon full to Boots water. You don't want him shootin poo everywhere!
Good luck!:D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces

I'd go easy on that stuff or it may make Boots do more than F@rtz.

The floaty stuff is squished clams. = :eek: !

You don't want him shootin poo everywhere!
:D

"... SQUISHED Klamz..." :eek:

OMG! Dad'z turned *GREEN* an passed out! :rolleyes:

Roger! onna *go eezy* part!
Dad wuz thinkin bout a halfa TEAspoon to kick thingz off - in wiffa full kuppa wadur.

Hope he comes-to in tyme ta drive us Home fur supper!

We're not too sure he haz da stummick fur dis Klam Juice stuff! :p

[Randi]

http://petoftheday.com/online/randi/clams.phred.jpg


john

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke


"... SQUISHED Klamz..." :eek:

OMG! Dad'z turned *GREEN* an passed out! :rolleyes:
Gosh, I hope your Dad doesn't find out that, if they treat clams like they do oysters, it's the WHOLE CLAM; guts, clam poo and all in there. Everything but the shell. Bottoms up!:eek: :D

[momoffuzzyfaces]

So...just wonderin, how did Bootz like the clam juice? Was it stinky?:D

[Corinna]

I just came upon this thread where Phred go so does the humor. So glad to here that some of us are recycled teens. Thought for a while it was nothing but teens here. So many new ones are. I think that Cinder and Smoke have tied ole Phred up some where cuz he hasn't signed on in along time. They seem to have taken control of the ranch.
Ps did the clams work for Boots.
Sps I love the Newset Shadow movie it was terrific!!!!!!!

[Edwina's Secretary]

I believe Phred is over on the Dog Board encouraging them to drink clam juice......

:D :D :D

[gini]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
I believe Phred is over on the Dog Board encouraging them to drink clam juice......

:D :D :D

Dog Board response: Yup, gimme those clams, I'll eat em - (tails wag, tails wag)....I'll eat the clams, I'll drink the juice, I'll even eat that tin - Yup, gimme those clams - pant pant (tails wag some more).

BOOTS WALKS AWAY IN DISGUST!

[lizbud]

Psst.... Corinna,

AMEN TO THAT !!!

This thread is by far the funniest, adult humor I've read
on the board in a long, long time. Full of wit & fun. I Love
it, but hate clam anything.:eek: :eek:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini


Dog Board response: Yup, gimme those clams, I'll eat em - (tails wag, tails wag)....I'll eat the clams, I'll drink the juice, I'll even eat that tin - Yup, gimme those clams - pant pant (tails wag some more).

BOOTS WALKS AWAY IN DISGUST!
LOL! My cats would try to bury it first; then walk away in disgust!:D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by gini


Dog Board response:
Yup, gimme those clams, I'll eat em -
(tails wag, tails wag)....
I'll eat the clams, I'll drink the juice,
I'll even eat that tin -
Yup, gimme those clams - pant pant
(tails wag some more).

BOOTS WALKS AWAY IN DISGUST!

Sad to report, but the Klam Juice Trials resulted in a major defeet... NO Takerz atta Ranch!

Dad bot da Klam Jug Saturday, jest after we got dun swimmin atta Park. We hadda stop at Cali's howse (we'z Dawg Sittin her while her folks are outta towne) to check onna Katz... So Dad wuz outta da Kar fur a few minnitz ;).

Sundee wuz to be the day of da Klam Trialz... But da Klamz cunnit be 'found'?? Seemz 'sumbuddie' :rolleyes: grabbed em offa frunt seet while Dad wuz Kat-Checkin an they got losted onna back seet unner our blankie. Klamz floated out when the boyz gotz ta GranMom's Village in P-burg...

Mundee Dad whipped up a kuppa Klam Chowdur fur da Kat in hiz kup onna vanity. Offurz it to da Kat.

Instant Fluffie Tail anna big *sneeze*! Dad dips a finner an shoves it inna Kat'z mouf. Tink we herd a lil *grooowl*. "Hey Dad, dont tink he'z too *keen* on dat flavur..."

Shudda kept quiet... Next thig I knowz MY noze iz inna Chowdur Kup :eek:! YUuuuuuKK! I wuz wavin my tung-lickker around till noon! :mad:

Smoke getz called inna baffroom - He let out a big Yelp when Dad tried to shuv hiz noze inna kup. Cali hi-tailed it unner the dinnin room tabul an wunnit even *come* when Dad called her! Dad wuz gonna dip anudder finner an give it a lick - but he chikkun'd out. We left wiffa Kat *skowlin* a durty glare fromma vanity.

Dad checked da kup soon as we got home - nary a drop gone! (An no damp sand inna Kat'z sandy box, eethur!) He fixed a fresh kuppa plane wadur - Kat jumpz up an startz slurrpin like he hazint seen wadur fur a week! Dad slopz in a shot a Klam Juice. Kat *puffz da Tail an goez ober an startz lickkin da fawcit...

Toozday da Kat had a selekshun ~
Wun kuppa plane wadur;
An wun kuppa Klam Chowdur...
Toosday nite da vote wuz kast - plane wadur half gone; Klam Chowdur still full to da brim!
Boots Kat is NOT a Klam Fancier!

Morul of da Storrie - we duzint tink ennebuddie inna howse is a Klam Fancier! :p

Soooo... Ennebuddie out there innerestud inna slitley uzed buckit a Klam Juice!?? Prolly *FREE* to a gud home! :rolleyes:

[sammi]

This post is so funny!!!! I like the clam- arr-ea !!
Many old timers posting on this thread.

[Edwina's Secretary]

Sorry Phred. Guess it wasn't a success! But what a slippery bottle of calm juice!

Makes me think of a time right after I was sent on assignment to Mexico. I was invited out to dinner one night by a co-worker and her husband. We went to a very elegant restaurant. Although I spoke Spanish my knoweledge of foods was -- like my diet at the time -- limited to beef, pork, and chicken. I ordered accordingly. My friend's husband ordered a dish with which I was not familiar. Very elaborate preparation tableside -- lots of garlic and who knows what all else. Served on toast points. As a guest I had to try it. :eek: :eek: I made all the correct guestlike comments..."How interesting!" "Very different taste!" all with the correct level of enthusiasm.

Finally someone figured out how to get through my thick gringa head -- "It's fish that makes electricity!"

She became, and still is, a very good friend. They frequently entertained me in their home. And often, as a special treat just for me since I had enjoyed it soooo much, he would make eel.

Thankd goodness for certain alcoholic beverages!

[Corinna]

Glad to hear boots is drinking again. I was getting concerned we had a cat get FUS and have to be put down . Please check magnesem
level in cat food.
I think any time Phred and the gang get a thread going it gets fun . Been missing these phunny ones, we used to have lots of them. Has anyone heard from Carrie, I haven,t seen her in a while Maybe I missed them as I didn't have much time this summer to read the board. Thank goodness for todays active threads, never could have kept up at all. Good to see so many "old timers".

[Randi]

LOL! - Sara, speaking of blunders when ordering food and other stuff in spanish, I had taught John a few sentences and as we were sitting in a cafe in Spain about to order coffee. As the waiter came, I said: You can do that John! :eek: This is what came out - "dos cafe con carne, por favor"! :rolleyes: The waiter was falling apart laughing, but got the meaning.
I did a similar one years ago in Spain. I wanted to buy a certain box of colourful soaps, so I went in to a country shop to try and get them there, as I was running out of time. I asked for jamon, instead of jabón. :rolleyes: The aged shopowner - and alone in the shop, came out with a huge ham for me. I kept trying to explain and his face lightened up! The next thing he presented for me was washing powder. It turned out he didn't have the soap at all.

John here... and by the way Phred, one must not generalise about clams, it's just like with people, there's always an attractive one out there somewhere!

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid35/pd672f04607fb6b372c5c163b0522d187/fd2c9ae9.jpg


Please Phred, be gentle with me!

Hugs and kisses from
Carla the clam

[Cinder & Smoke]

Carla, da Klam, sez...

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid35/pd672f04607fb6b372c5c163b0522d187/fd2c9ae9.jpg

" Rejection :( is Sooo hard to take...

Won't sumbuddie paLeeze take me out of this cold jug
an send me ober to the local Klam Rescue? "

:D

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke


Sad to report, but the Klam Juice Trials resulted in a major defeet... NO Takerz atta Ranch!

He fixed a fresh kuppa plane wadur - Kat jumpz up an startz slurrpin like he hazint seen wadur fur a week! Dad slopz in a shot a Klam Juice. Kat *puffz da Tail an goez ober an startz lickkin da fawcit...

Toozday da Kat had a selekshun ~
Wun kuppa plane wadur;
An wun kuppa Klam Chowdur...
Toosday nite da vote wuz kast - plane wadur half gone; Klam Chowdur still full to da brim!
Boots Kat is NOT a Klam Fancier!

Soooo... Ennebuddie out there innerestud inna slitley uzed buckit a Klam Juice!?? Prolly *FREE* to a gud home! :rolleyes:

LOL!!! Sounds to me that the clam juice worked great. Just keep it on hand and give Boots the option of it or water and he'll start drinkin water like a fishy. :D

[lynnestankard]

Oh ROTFL - I leave this plaice for a little while and the running aMucK starts!!! Well done all of you - it's been so funny reading this thread from the beginning.
As long as Boots is drinkin' his wadder like a good Kat - we're all happy. xxx

Lynne

[Randi]

Breaking news!

Clams Not Really Happy, Say Experts

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid36/pd912404a08f4614cf2481c53ae5491e7/fd20b520.jpg

OSLO, Norway (AheadOfNews.com) - Marine Biologists at the prestigious Clam Study Center have determined that the expression "happy as a clam" is apparently not based on actual clam psychology.
Dr. Lars Nilsbokken, head Marine Psychobiologist at the center, says that clams are rarely happy in most environments. "Imagine that you have no eyes," he says, "and that you have no arms and legs, and that there is a constant battering of waves that prevents you from hearing well." He hunkers down and holds his thin hands above him, wiggling his fingers. "All you've got is a big mouth, and a foot."

"Now imagine that there is a psycho after you, who is hundreds of times larger than you, and has a sturdy shovel. You can't run, so you try desperately to hide, but you have to be at the surface of the sand to eat. At any moment, you may have to dig for your life, using your one foot." Dr. Nilsbokken's Reebok wiggles frantically in sympathy.

"So the answer is 'no', clams are not happy. Clams are neurotic, fearful, desperate, and lonely." Nilsbokken adds, "If you want happy, I recommend cats. Cats don't need anyone else to be happy, and sometimes, even if you don't want them to, they'll come over and be happy with you."

[gini]

So, when your hands are feeling a little "clammy" does that mean you are unhappy?:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Randi
[b]Clams Not Really Happy, Say Experts
"So the answer is 'no', clams are not happy. Clams are neurotic, fearful, desperate, and lonely." /QUOTE]
Plus clams stink!!! No wonder they are lonely!:D

[lynnestankard]

And lets face it - their ugly - the weren't hit from a twig off the ugly tree - the whole darn thing fell on 'em!! No wonder their unhappy - would you want your daughter to marry one? No! I rest my case!!!!!
:D :D :o :D :D

Lynne

[lbaker]

A face only a mother could love? Aly would probably want to foster it :p :rolleyes: ;)
Laurie

[Logan]

Originally posted by lbaker
A face only a mother could love? Aly would probably want to foster it :p :rolleyes: ;)
Laurie

:D :D :D You priceless, Laurie!!!! Hehehe!!!

[Edwina's Secretary]

Dr. Lars Nilsbokken, head Marine Psychobiologist

Psychobiologist

So this is a guy who psychoanalyzes marine life??????????

Imagine getting stuck next to him at a dinner party. "So Dr. what's new?" "I'm working with an interesting patient. It's a clam with agoraphobia!"

[gini]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary


Psychobiologist


Imagine getting stuck next to him at a dinner party. "So Dr. what's new?" "I'm working with an interesting patient. It's a clam with agoraphobia!"

Sara!:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) How funny!

[Edwina's Secretary]

Not to mention this guy
wiggles frantically in sympathy. with a clam.

So can't you just picture the clam "on the couch"........"Dr. Nilsbokken, I'm so depressed. I constantly feel battered. I'm so lonely. None of the other clams want to be with me. Is it because I'm so smelly? Tell me the truth, doc!"

[Logan]

LOL!!!! LOL!!!! I can't tell you guys how hard I have been laughing this morning!!!! (Thank you very much, Randi!!!) I'm sure the guy who was here to do my termite inspection thought I was nuts........he was under the house and I was up here just laughing my fool head off. He probably thinks I'm looney and dangerous, so he gave me a good report!!!!! :D

[gini]

Oh Logan, you are going to turn this into a termite thread!!

A few years ago, a client had a major brochure printed and then they were shrink wrapped for shipping. When they reached the ultimate destination we immediately had a complaint! There were termites shrink wrapped in the brochures. The printing firm raced to make things right and soon everyone was happy.

My job was to send the final printing bill payment. I just couldn't resist - because all of us had been working together for years and it was a good relationship - I found a picture of termites on the internet - copied it many times, cut them out and included them with the check.

When he opened the envelope, all of these "termites" fell out too.

[lbaker]

........that's mitey clever (sorry, couldn't resist:o )

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini
Oh Logan, you are going to turn this into a termite thread!!

My job was to send the final printing bill payment. I just couldn't resist - because all of us had been working together for years and it was a good relationship - I found a picture of termites on the internet - copied it many times, cut them out and included them with the check.

When he opened the envelope, all of these "termites" fell out too.
Bet that really bugged him, huh?:D

[lynnestankard]

Originally posted by Logan
........ He probably thinks I'm looney and dangerous, so he gave me a good report!!!!! :D

Way to go Logan - Good report off the termite man!!!!!!!!!

Lynne

[Randi]

Originally posted by Logan
LOL!!!! LOL!!!! I can't tell you guys how hard I have been laughing!!!!
Me too!!! - and it's SO healthy! :D

Originally posted by Logan
I'm sure the guy who was here to do my termite inspection thought I was nuts........he was under the house and I was up here just laughing my fool head off. He probably thinks I'm looney and dangerous, so he gave me a good report!!!!! :D
OMG, I can picture it!!!
http://petoftheday.com/online/randi/phredsfridge.jpg

Logan, I hope you got a good report - or else I'll send Fister over to inspect!

Gini! I just love it! :D :D :D

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

:D :) ;) :cool: :D :D

LOL You guys are too much, but this is just what I needed after a rough week at work. :)

However, I think I'm just going to have to flea this thread so I do gnat bust a gut from laughing so hard! :) :D :)

[Cinder & Smoke]

Hey :) Ebberbuddie ~

Youze guyz member da Bukit a KLAMZ we got sittin *shivvurin* in der Jug inna fridge??!
Dad sez iffin we duzint find a new howze fur dem purdy soon - der gonna turn REELEE :eek: GREEN!

We had our boarder collie bud, Miz Cali, stayin wiff us last week (her folkz outta towne). Dad wuz playin smatree-@ss an thunk he'd unload da Klamz into her tummie kuz she's alluz hungree...

So he fixziz up a lil kuppa Klam Chowdur inna kitchin an kallz "Hey Cali, cummere - got sumpin fur ya!" We checked an knew whut it wuz; Cali goez flyin inna kitchin an jamz her big schnozz rite inna kup :eek:!

*Ka-SNEEZE-A-ROO*!!
Blew Klam Sauce 'n Gutz ALL Ober da kabinetz!
Dad sez NUTZ! :mad: (well, thass not quite whut he sed :rolleyes: ) and started moppin uppa mess!

Cali runn'd back out inna livin room an started wipin her mouff onna rug! She kept axkin "Whut WUZ that stuff??? Woorser than Ded Phissh!!"

Dad'z wunderin iffin da Horseys, out back atta horsey farm, might like a New Taste wiffa hay? :rolleyes:

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke
Hey :) Ebberbuddie ~
Dad'z wunderin iffin da Horseys, out back atta horsey farm, might like a New Taste wiffa hay? :rolleyes:

Don't know about dem horseys, C & S, but you might suggest to your dad that dem klams might make good fertilizer for any flowers he might have outside. Might want to dilute it a bit though, wouldn't want klam overkill or anything. ;) :)

Oh, and this is just a suggestion before the bottle turns green and walks out of the refrigerator itself. :eek: I've never used klams as fertilizer before. Can't sayz I've ever even dreamed of buying any klam juice. Not much a fan of clams I am. ;) :)

[momoffuzzyfaces]

LOL!!! Oh, my!! I haven't laughted so hard in a long time!!! I think I would give that clam juice the old burial at sea like Dad used to do to our dead fish. The old toilet flush thing. Good luck! You could write a book -
The Clam that Stayed Forever!!!:D

[gini]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom


dem klams might make good fertilizer for any flowers he might have outside. Might want to dilute it a bit though, wouldn't want klam overkill or anything. ;) :)

;) :)

Yeah, but I bet the flowers would NEBBER open:p :p

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini

Yeah, but I bet the flowers would NEBBER open:p :p
If they did; what in the world would they look like? Sea grass? :eek: :D

[AmberLee]

Originally posted by gini
Yeah, but I bet the flowers would NEBBER open

I must be having an over literal night, but considering what usually fertilizes flowers, it seems hard to imagine that clams would faze them... :o :rolleyes: :eek: :o

[Cinder & Smoke]

Flowers...??? :confused:

Is that a fancee name fur Big Weedz??

If so - they duzint seem ta need any speshul fertalizer -
seem ta grow jest fine in our yard! :rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by AmberLee


I must be having an over literal night, but considering what usually fertilizes flowers, it seems hard to imagine that clams would faze them... :o :rolleyes: :eek: :o
LOL!!! I don't grow plants myself, so forgot all about that!!! :eek: :D

[Randi]

Phred, it you get a few more of these cans and empty them all around your house - at a distance of course, you won't need a fence! :eek: All the neighborhood dogs and cats are bound to stay away! And who knows what plants will grow along that line :D

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Maybe this could be a new deterrent to crime. Instead of bread and water give them bread and clam juice!!! It'd sure make me behave!:eek: :D

[lynnestankard]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke
Flowers...??? :confused:

Is that a fancee name fur Big Weedz??

If so - they duzint seem ta need any speshul fertalizer -
seem ta grow jest fine in our yard! :rolleyes:


Thats the answer Cinder & Smoke - Get Dad to bury the clams in the back yard - - - it should kill all the Big Weedz Good Luck!!!


Lynne

[AmberLee]

Originally posted by Randi
...And who knows what plants will grow along that line...

Doesn't this sound like an episode from The Twilight Zone ... eerie music, anyone? Hee, hee, hee.

[lynnestankard]

This smacks of 'Day of the Triffids'!!! :eek: :o :confused: :D

Lynne

[Randi]

Oh no Phred! Please don't use the clams to fertilise your plants, you might end up with a yard full of TRIFFIDS! :mad:

A heavy drum beat; a sickly green light floods the screen; highlighting a series of faces as they stare upwards. Eerie choral music complements the air of impending danger. Something wet and leathery flies out, striking a screaming woman. The 'tongue' slithers towards the viewer, obscuring all else.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid37/pcbd6aa6bb8658936ec0fe6f441188f29/fd1e1a08.jpg
Weed or Triffid? -
It’s your decision!

“I whipped round to find a triffid towering only a few feet behind me. In one automatic movement I had my hands over my eyes. I heard the sting whistle as it slashed out at me - but there was no knockout, no agonizing burning, even. One’s mind can move like lightning at such a moment; nevertheless, it was more instinct than reason which sent me leaping at it before it had time to strike again. I collided with it, overturning it, and even as I went down with it my hands were on the upper part of the stem, trying to pull off the cup and the sting. Triffid stems do not snap - but they can be mangled. This one was mangled thoroughly before I stood up”

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid37/p3f9af9a13dd9e2f6cb2acfef70a80110/fd1e1a07.jpg

Well Phred, it’s beginning to look as if you shouldn’t have taken our advice about the clams in the first place, doesn’t it! So, if you see anything like this appearing in the yard, you’d better make an emergency call to your friends on Pet Talk, we’re here to help you out! :D

john

[Edwina's Secretary]

What's a clam to do????? Doc, you should hear how they talk about me. Isn't life hard enough for me -- shut in all day in the same old shell? Cats shun me....even DOGS shun me (at least I have the distinction of being the first digestable shunned by a dog...)

Now they want to bury me in the garden -- sacrifice me to the gods for a triffid! NO dignity at all!

Doc, doc, you gotta help me break out of my shell!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary

Doc, doc, you gotta help me break out of my shell!
Then you'd be a SNAIL!!! I'm not sure that would be an improvement.:D

[lynnestankard]

A SNAIL WIHOUT A SHELL.....................................Thats a SLUG! Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwyyyy.

Lynne

[Edwina's Secretary]

Then you'd be a SNAIL

Thats a SLUG

no, no....then I'd be ESCARGOT!!!!

I'd be French...exotic....people would love me....shower me with garlic

no more shame, no more fertilizer for monster plants....

I'd be GOURMET!!!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary


no, no....then I'd be ESCARGOT!!!!

I'd be French...exotic....people would love me....shower me with garlic

no more shame, no more fertilizer for monster plants....

I'd be GOURMET!!!
YOU'D BE LUNCH!!!:D :D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
YOU'D BE LUNCH!!!:D :D

:eek: :p

Not at our Howse! :p

[Corinna]

Maybe some of you from the west coast, remember Ivors acres of clams. (showing age again) His tag line was "Keep Clam" Most of you must be mid westerners We on the west coast know what clams are good for. Ever wonder why Viagra sales are low here?

[Logan]

LOL!!!!! Corinna!!!! That is too funny.........I always heard that oysters were good for that......that's what we believe in the South, anyway!!!! :o

[AmberLee]

Do any of you remember the Dilbert book where due to a typo Scott Adams agreed to 'verify your clam'? It became a running joke through a couple books: how to face identify a clam so it could be verified, etc.

Have Phred's clams been VERIFIED? No wonder he's in Triffid danger. Can Smokey and Cinder verify a clam to protect their home??? Inquiring minds want to know...

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Logan
LOL!!!!! Corinna!!!! That is too funny.........I always heard that oysters were good for that......that's what we believe in the South, anyway!!!! :o
Are oysters and clams da same thing? Oysters got pearls but do clams? If clams had pearls too they may be good for something after all. Though I'm not sure I'd like a necklace made from clam pearls. 'Course there may not be any difference. Isn't it amazing that oyster spit on a grain of sand can make a pretty pearl?:eek: :D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi

“I whipped round to find a triffid towering only a few feet behind me...
I heard the sting whistle as it slashed out at me... :eek:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid37/p3f9af9a13dd9e2f6cb2acfef70a80110/fd1e1a07.jpg


HALP! :eek:

We gotz sum purdy Nastee Lookin thingeez growin inna yard...
Could they be the dredded T R I F F I D s??

Have they been noted fur *attakin* lil Dawggiez on late nite outiez??

Inquirin myndz Need ta Knowe!! :confused:

[Corinna]

Clams and oysters are two different species of Mollusks. Clams are in shells like the shell gas emblem. Oysters are in a really different shell the two taste totally different. I like oysters broiled in butter but I agree on clams YUCK!!!! My family loves them though. I leave when its clam bake time.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke


HALP! :eek:

We gotz sum purdy Nastee Lookin thingeez growin inna yard...
Could they be the dredded T R I F F I D s??

Have they been noted fur *attakin* lil Dawggiez on late nite outiez??

Inquirin myndz Need ta Knowe!! :confused:
I tink day eat ebby ting...
dawggiez, katz, hoomanz...
I don no how to stop em. maybe puttin salt on dar tails.... no, wait, dats how you catch a birdie....
ARGGGGGG!!!!:eek:

[Randi]

Dear Phred ...

I can quite understand your concern about Cinder & Smokey (not to mention Boots the Shadow). The only information I could find regarding dogs and Triffids was this:

”Along the way, stuff blows up, airplanes crash, and these weird looking plants kill a dog. Bill does a doubletake at this dead dog and wonders what's up, but then decides the dog is just sleeping something off and leaves with his child-bride” :confused:

On the other hand, there is apparently a way to beat them, and this is where you, Phred, with your special skills, can help save the world:

”Back on the other side of Triffid County, Phred and Karen are burning the midnight oil trying to find a way to beat back the menacing plants, and accidentally find a way when Phred turns a fire hose on them that's connected to sea water. Salt water destroys Triffids! We have lots of that! We're saved!”

So perhaps you’d better do something about those “weeds” before they do something about you! :eek:
On the other hand, if the worst comes to the worst, the Triffids do make everybody blind, so you can at least use Cinder & Smokey as Guide Dogs!

john

PS. It’s interesting that SEAWATER does them in, does all this really have something to do with Edwinas’ clam juice after all? :rolleyes:

[AmberLee]

bwahahaha!

[lbaker]

salt on a birds tail? :eek: salt water against the mighty triffids? :eek: Well it does work to dissolve slugs so maybe we're on to something here. Here he comes to save the daaaayyy, the mighty Phred is on his waaaaayyyyy..........................Laurie

[zippy-kat]

Phred, perhaps if water-mollusks aren't to your liking you might try the alternative......

:eek: MOUNTAIN OYSTERS?!?! :eek:


*GAG*

[lbaker]

hmmmmm Zip, first the shadow, then triffids....I wonder how many even have even HEARD of mountain oysters:confused: and... agreed
*UGH ACK YUCK

[Corinna]

Zippy Kat do you mean Lamb fries????

[lynnestankard]

*Aggggghhhhh* ~~Yucccccckkkkkky~~

- - sICK bAg- - Please............................................ ..........too late!!


Lynne

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi & John
Triffids...

”Back on the other side of Triffid County, Phred and Karen are burning the midnight oil trying to find a way to beat back the menacing plants, and accidentally find a way when Phred turns a fire hose on them that's connected to sea water. Salt water destroys Triffids! We have lots of that! We're saved!”

Uhhhh, Dad sez we still gotz a problem...
Saltee Waddur is a lil scarce here in O-HI-O :(. Dad duzint tink da FD has enuff hose to lay a supply line frum da Oshun into the back yard. :rolleyes:




PS. It’s interesting that SEAWATER does them in, does all this really have something to do with Edwinas’ clam juice after all? :rolleyes:

Seawaddur an Klamz is more 'related' den Mountain Oysterz an Triffidz iz! :p :D

:D ;)

[gini]

Leave you guys alone for just a few days and look what you have done to this thread!! It has been reduced to a discussion of MOUNTAIN OYSTERS:eek: :eek: :eek:

[Edwina's Secretary]

"Lambs fries"....I always thought there was a bull involved in mountain oysters??????

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by zippy-kat
...you might try the alternative......

:eek: MOUNTAIN OYSTERS?!?! :eek:
*GAG*

Smokey wuz tinkin da Mountun Oysterz sounded purdy gud... :rolleyes:

Till I splained to him whut the main ingreedientz wus...

He tucked his tail down reel tite an went ober an curled up wiffa Kat ~
They wuz boff mumblin "Ewwwww... GROSS!!" :p



"Lambs fries"...
I always thought there was a bull involved in Mountain Oysters ???

Dad sez he tinks it'z whuteber GUY walked thru da barnyard last
dat getz involved. :rolleyes: :D

[lbaker]

Ingredients

2 lb bull testicles*
1 c flour
1/4 c cornmeal
1 c red wine
1 salt
1 black pepper
1 garlic powder
1 louisiana hot sauce
1 cooking oil**

Instructions

*aka: calf fries, Rocky Mountain Oysters (sheep or turkey testicles
may be used also)

zlam juz is optional

don't think I'll continue with the recipe, it's lunch time:rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

GROSS!!!! I MAY NEVER EAT AGAIN!!! :eek: :eek: :D

[gini]

Laurie, there is a recipe thread in case you want to add it there:) :p :p

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by lbaker
Ingredients

2 lb bull *WHAT??*
...
1 c red wine
...


Weez gonna need a LOT more than "1 c"
of da red wine ta make THIS wun float!!!! :rolleyes:

:D

[gini]

Phred, aren't you taking this a little too personally?

I mean if the recipe called for two chicken breasts, betcha wouldn't say a word!!:D :D

[lbaker]

OMG GINI :eek: :eek:

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by gini
... if the recipe called for two chicken breasts,
betcha wouldn't say a word!!:D :D

Dad sez...

There's a difference tween Pieces an Partz! :rolleyes:

:p

[lbaker]

......ahem. nownow children, we don't want to get "the mayor"s britches in an uproar;) :rolleyes:

[Corinna]

Ok I am womdering if Boots is still drinking? (water)
Lady (newfy) went out this morning and gave a dirty look at her water bucket, It was frozen well guess that happens when the tempture is 3 degrees. No snow to insulate the ground . We need the freeze to kill the bugs abd mosqutios for next summer but do need the snow (yuck) it will keep it warmer! Maybe 10 degrees.

[Randi]

Heh, this is getting iiinteresting! :eek: Didn’t know we had so many gourmets on Pet Talk, who could discuss the more subtle aspects of culinary art in such a civilised manner. Those “Mountain Oyster” things sound really cool! So I’ve found some even more exotic examples for your delicate palets. How about these:

Battered Balls
Cut the testes (your choice) into broad, thin slices
Marinate for 1 hour in oil, lemon juice, chopped parsley, salt and pepper.
Dip them in light batter
Fry and serve with ketchup or chili sauce

Barnyard Family Jewels
A delicate mixture of calf, bull, sheep and turkey testicles. All can be prepared as above. The differing sizes make an interesting platter(!)

Crabby Bull Balls
2 Lbs. Testicles (Bull or buffalo)
1 ounce Lemon Juice
Boil battered balls in oil. Serve with testicle sauce and crab spice

This one looks like good clean fun in the kitchen, and is just the job for Phred (Cinder & Smokey say he likes “Nukin” his food):

Ranch Fry
Toss the balls on a hot iron stove
When they explode....they're done! :D

… and to top it all off, Randi’s found another interesting aspect of food preparation, I think that this will be our last recipe:

Kamikaze Soup:
(Best prepared at a party -- at someone else's house)

4 - 5 cans “Clambell” Soup.

Place cans, unopened, in microwave. Set to full power for 10 minutes.
Leave. :eek:

Bon Appetit!

john

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Randi
Heh, this is getting iiinteresting! :eek:

… and to top it all off, Randi’s found another interesting aspect of food preparation, I think that this will be our last recipe:

Klamikaze Soup:
(Best prepared at a party -- at someone else's house)

4 - 5 cans “Clambell” Soup.

Place cans, unopened, in microwave. Set to full power for 10 minutes...
Leave. :eek:

Bon Appetit!

John

"...I think that this will be our last recipe..."

:rolleyes: Yeaaaaah... and it mite be da last post fur a lotta us, too! :p

We tinks we hearz da Hed Bunnie *stompin* :mad: dis way... :eek:!!

[lbaker]

uh oh.......busted again

[gini]

Before we all get busted for sure..........I want to know what Testy cicles are. Can you find them on the same shelf as the Klam juice?

[lbaker]

they are cicles that are getting a wee bit angry....:rolleyes:

[Corinna]

If you do I want to know where you shop so I can avoid that place. Also gini I had also a thousand answers the other day. You made me smile. Thanks

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Randi

Serve with testicle sauce and crab spice

YUCK!!! BOTH THESE IN ONE RECIPE?
MOFF turns GREEN :eek: and passes out. :D

[gini]

Originally posted by lbaker
they are cicles that are getting a wee bit angry....:rolleyes:

You mean they are just being "crabby?"

[Edwina's Secretary]

Oh dear...I feel responsible for this degeneration! I went to a sushi lunch (hey Phred...I think you would call that PHISH BAIT) and upon my return....recipes for......

crab???????

[Cinder & Smoke]

...sushi lunch ??

Dad wood call it sumpin a lot worser than
PHISH BAIT!!! :rolleyes:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

PHISH BAIT -- THAT'S WHAT MY DAD CALLED SHRIMPS!! :eek: :D

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Originally posted by lbaker
they are cicles that are getting a wee bit angry....:rolleyes:

And our nick name for motorcycles is murder cicles, so if you take that into consideration, testy cicles might just be a bunch of bikers that you really don't want to mess with. Especially if they've been samplin' some of Randi's cookin' without knowing the ingredients. ;) :D

[lynnestankard]

Oh ROTFL - will you guys give over - I've got tears streaming down my face and tummy ache with laffin so much!!:D :D

I tried Crab Cakes while I was over there --- and they were delish.
But all this RAW PHISH Stuff is making me feel bIlLiOus :eek: :eek:

Randi - John, Your recipes were hilarious esp., the Kamikaze Soup!!!!

Lynne

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Spooky music plays in the back ground....
Where has everyone gone? Munched up by killer clams? Slimed to death by slippery snails? Toasted by testy triffids? ...
only the Shadow knows.
Muuuhahahaha...:eek:

[gini]

Ha! We are still here. Bet you thought the triffids got everyone!

Why don't we write a story - like the three bears

Papa Triffid
Mama Triffid
Baby Triffid

were very hungry........................

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini
Ha! We are still here. Bet you thought the triffids got everyone!

Why don't we write a story - like the three bears

Papa Triffid
Mama Triffid
Baby Triffid

were very hungry........................

... mean while, skipping through Phred's back yard was Clare Clam. She tossed her blond hair in the wind. Hark!!! What's that? She pauses. Then gasps as she sees...............

[Cinder & Smoke]

Yeah, roger onna Spookie Muzik :eek: !

Weez gettin all confuzzeld up...

We wuz passin thru da kitchen when Dad openz da fridge - an we boff *panik'd* kuz we thunk the Dredded Triffidz wuz gonna scape an :eek: tack us! Dad sed we wuz a kuppla Dingie Twitz. Now, whussa *Twit*??

So, now da *Triffidz* aren't inna fridge - they're lurkin inna back yard??

An whutz inna fridge - sidez da *Klamz*?? We gotta wurrie bout ennie Krabz, ded Phish, or Slugz yet?

An theze *Cicle* thinggiez - they like POP ciclez - gud ta munch on?? We like *snakz*! :D

OMG! How'd Klare Klam - dat *blonde* wun - get inna back yard wiffa Triffidz? Whoz chasin who?

Dis Tail is gettin komplikated! :rolleyes:

[gini]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces


... mean while, skipping through Phred's back yard was Clare Clam. She tossed her blond hair in the wind. Hark!!! What's that? She pauses. Then gasps as she sees...............

.......gasps as she sees the cutest flowers, all different sizes. Being blonde and all, she goes right up to them and says "Where's Phred? I need to see Phred right away!"

And Papa Triffid says........"come closer my dear, the better to............."

[Cinder & Smoke]

The Tail so far...


Papa Triffid
Mama Triffid
and Baby Triffid

were very hungry........................


... mean while, skipping through Phred's back yard was Clare Clam. She tossed her blond hair in the wind. Hark!!! What's that? She pauses. Then gasps as she sees...............

... the cutest flowers, all different sizes. Being blonde and all, she goes right up to them and says "Where's Phred? I need to see Phred right away!"

And MOMMA Triffid says... "Come closer my dear, the better to..."


Meenwhile, Pappa Triffid, riding atop the nayburz Floppie-Eared Jackass, iz galloping across the pasture, headed strait for poor Cinder, who'z nonshalauntlee munchin onna Road Apple, oblivius to the approaching *doom*. Gud Boy SmokeMutt, who nebber goez inna pasture wiffa horseyz, .....

[gini]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke

Meenwhile, Pappa Triffid, riding atop the nayburz Floppie-Eared Jackass, iz galloping across the pasture, headed strait for poor Cinder, who'z nonshalauntlee munchin onna Road Apple, oblivius to the approaching *doom*. Gud Boy SmokeMutt, who nebber goez inna pasture wiffa horseyz, .....

......finally deciding he is sick and tired of Cinder getting all the goodies since he only gets cicles at home, glances in Phred's direction. Phred is completely distracted by Klare Klam so SmokeMutt dashes into the pasture and............

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini


......finally deciding he is sick and tired of Cinder getting all the goodies since he only gets cicles at home, glances in Phred's direction. Phred is completely distracted by Klare Klam so SmokeMutt dashes into the pasture and............
... finds the WORLDS biggest KUMQUAT!!! And ...

[gini]

Kumquat????? That is definitely a Phred word............so I will leave it open for him to continue the story.

[Cinder & Smoke]

continuing our Twisted Tail...

...finally deciding he is sick and tired of Cinder getting all the goodies since he only gets cicles at home, glances in Phred's direction. Phred is completely distracted by Klare Klam so SmokeMutt dashes into the pasture and...

... finds the WORLDS biggest KUMQUAT!!! And ...

...Wunderz aloud "Awwww, NUTZ! I gotz no pokitz, so'z I cant carry our *Qumquat Opner*!"

Undaunted, Smokey *rollz* hiz prized Qumquat towards Cinder, hoping for help. :eek: Sez the Floppie Jackass seein the HUGE Qumquat rollin into hiz path, an jamz on hiz Whoa-erz. The sudden stop dislodgez the skilled equesterian Poppa Triffid - and much like Poor Miz Zippy, he *FLIEZ* off his trustee mount, over the vizibly uppyset Miz Cinnerz, and landz...

[gini]

Hang on there Miz Cinners we won't leave you in this terrible situation long, but some buddy out in Calif. needs to eat dinner. (animation is completely suspended, temporarily).

Unless some buddy else wants to get in on the action!!

[lynnestankard]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke


...Wunderz aloud "Awwww, NUTZ! I gotz no pokitz, so'z I cant carry our *Qumquat Opner*!"

Undaunted, Smokey *rollz* hiz prized Qumquat towards Cinder, hoping for help. :eek: Sez the Floppie Jackass seein the HUGE Qumquat rollin into hiz path, an jamz on hiz Whoa-erz. The sudden stop dislodgez the skilled equesterian Poppa Triffid - and much like Poor Miz Zippy, he *FLIEZ* off his trustee mount, over the vizibly uppyset Miz Cinnerz, and landz...

............In the biggest foulest puddle of...clam juice!!! 'AAAAAAAAAAAggggghhhhh' he roars, as he sails through the air 'Didn't nobody tell you that when a Triffid lands in clam juice he...........................


Lynne

[Randi]

Apparently Kumquat isn’t a Phred word, I just HAD to check it out, never having heard of such a thing before. But there are some interesting aspects to this. Perhaps it’s Kumquats that are precursors for Triffids? :eek:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid37/pd119e0d6ae694b339c0c6ffdff0f1241/fd178704.jpg
Kumquat
Scientific Name: Fortunella sp.
Family: Rutaceae

This kumquat is only 2 feet high. It was planted last fall.
(…and will probably be about 10 feet high and hungry by springtime!)

Recommended Temperature Zone: Sunset
(The twilight Zone?)

Growth Habits: Censored

Watering Needs: Needs adequate soil moisture for healthy growth and good fruit production.
(Clam juice not recommended!)

Cultural Practices: Easy to care for, takes well to pruning. Needs to be fertilized regularly for optimal growth and good fruit production.
(OK Cinder & Smokie?)

How are Kumquats used?
How good is your imagination? They can be used in as many ways as your imagination will allow! Kumquats are best when they are fully ripe from December 15th until April 15th :rolleyes:

john

[zippy-kat]

must click the heels of his ruby red stilettos,
http://www.electriqueboutique.com/shop/images/179.jpg

and repeat "There's no place like Phred's Backyard" or else he'd turn into a clam when the clock struck midnight. But Papa Treffid was without his infamous stilettos--what to do? As Cinder and Smoke were quite busy with the 'quat, Papa Treffid decided to see what he could dig up in Phred's closet. Papa Treffid entered Phred's abode, opened the door to the closet and found.....

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by zippy-kat
must click the heels of his ruby red stilettos,
http://www.electriqueboutique.com/shop/images/179.jpg

and repeat "There's no place like Phred's Backyard" or else he'd turn into a clam when the clock struck midnight. But Papa Treffid was without his infamous stilettos--what to do? As Cinder and Smoke were quite busy with the 'quat, Papa Treffid decided to see what he could dig up in Phred's closet. Papa Treffid entered Phred's abode, opened the door to the closet and found.....
Phiremen's boots in all colors. Finding a bright red pair. Pappa Triffid puts them on and admires himself in a near by mirror. Taking another peek in the closet he gasped as he saw....

[gini]

.......cases and cases of Klam Juice...........all marked with a Chicago return address and cards that said, "with much love from Edwina's secretary." Who woulda thunk that Phred........................

[lynnestankard]

........was a closet clam juice drinker'!!!!! Aggggghhhhh. Quietly closing the door Papa Triffid started to tippytoe to the bedroom door, but just then............


Lynne

[momoffuzzyfaces]

...he hears a loud racket at the front door. Peeking around the bedroom door he seens SmokeMutt rolling his giant Kumquat into the house. Pappa Triffid gasps. 'I know that Kumquat. That's.....'

[Edwina's Secretary]

Dr. Nilsbokken, world famous psychobiologist, wriggling frantically in sympathy with

[zippy-kat]

red stilettos, black feather boa, and classy Claire Clam in his shirt pocket. Claire.....

[smokey the elder]

Originally posted by Randi
Apparently Kumquat isn’t a Phred word, I just HAD to check it out, never having heard of such a thing before. But there are some interesting aspects to this. Perhaps it’s Kumquats that are precursors for Triffids? :eek:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid37/pd119e0d6ae694b339c0c6ffdff0f1241/fd178704.jpg
Kumquat
Scientific Name: Fortunella sp.
Family: Rutaceae

This kumquat is only 2 feet high. It was planted last fall.
(…and will probably be about 10 feet high and hungry by springtime!)

Recommended Temperature Zone: Sunset
(The twilight Zone?)

Growth Habits: Censored

Watering Needs: Needs adequate soil moisture for healthy growth and good fruit production.
(Clam juice not recommended!)

Cultural Practices: Easy to care for, takes well to pruning. Needs to be fertilized regularly for optimal growth and good fruit production.
(OK Cinder & Smokie?)

How are Kumquats used?
How good is your imagination? They can be used in as many ways as your imagination will allow! Kumquats are best when they are fully ripe from December 15th until April 15th :rolleyes:

john

Maybe you can use them to pay your taxes.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

To re-cap and re-zoom our story...
Pappy Triffid, wearing red phireman's boots, is peeking around the bed room door as SmokeyMutt rolls his prize kumquat into the room. The kumquat is Dr. Nilsbokken the world's famous psychobiologist who is wearing red stillettos, a black feather boa and has stuffed Claire Clam in his pocket.

Claire has been clam-napped!!! She didn't realize she was the darling of the Triffid and Kumquat world. Help! Help! she yells.
Does someone help poor Claire Clam? Who will turn out to be her hero? .... Suddenly ...:D

[wolflady]

http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/rofl.gif
How on EARTH did I miss this thread! What great entertainment!!!

....
to continue with the story...
Claire has been clam-napped!!! She didn't realize she was the darling of the Triffid and Kumquat world. Help! Help! she yells.
Does someone help poor Claire Clam? Who will turn out to be her hero? .... Suddenly ...

a deep and dark voice from the netherworld resounds: Who knows what clam lurks in the pocket of Dr. Nilsbokken???

http://members.iquest.net/~drivers/images/Shadow.gif

The Shadow knows!!! Muahahahahahahaha....

[Corinna]

As the Shadow stands ready with his red sauce ready , his 2 faithful shepard dogs stand ready to catch the clams as they jump from the Doctors pocket in to ..........

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Corinna
As the Shadow stands ready with his red sauce ready , his 2 faithful shepard dogs stand ready to catch the clams as they jump from the Doctors pocket in to ..........
... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...

[gini]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces

... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...
Phred reappears just in time to.......

(Where's Phred been? All hell has broken lose in his house, his closet and he doesn't do nuttin!)

[Cinder & Smoke]

our saga marchuz on...

... the net held by Pappa Triffid that he found in Phred's closet while looking for phiremen's boots. Pappa Triffid and the the clams make a break for the door. Suddenly ...

Phred reappears just in time to...



... Spot da muddie Kumquat Trakz Smokey left onna rug as he rolled hiz Prized Giant Kumquat into the kitchun, where Boots, da Kat, iz poized to toss down frum the kounter the Lektrik Kumquat Opner.

:eek: sez :mad: Phred...
<Oopz> sez Smokey...
<OMG!> sez Boots...

NUTZ! ses Poppa Triffid as he tripz ober Phred's big footz blockin the door.

"Whut da..." sez Cinders, who'z just scampurin up the frunt stepz, as a giant ball a Triffid Rootz, Klamz, an Red Fiur Boots katapultz out da door.
Poppa Triffid recoverz quicklie, grabz da Klam Net, and dashez off leaving distinktive boot printz - kuz he gotz da Big Red Bootz onna wrong rootz :rolleyes:.

Meenzwhile, Floppie Earz da Jack@ss has jumped da fence an gallupied round da howze an meetz up wiff Poppa Triffid, who...

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Cinder & Smoke



... Spot da muddie Kumquat Trakz Smokey left onna rug as he rolled hiz Prized Giant Kumquat into the kitchun, where Boots, da Kat, iz poized to toss down frum the kounter the Lektrik Kumquat Opner.

:eek: sez :mad: Phred...
<Oopz> sez Smokey...
<OMG!> sez Boots...

NUTZ! ses Poppa Triffid as he tripz ober Phred's big footz blockin the door.

"Whut da..." sez Cinders, who'z just scampurin up the frunt stepz, as a giant ball a Triffid Rootz, Klamz, an Red Fiur Boots katapultz out da door.
Poppa Triffid recoverz quicklie, grabz da Klam Net, and dashez off leaving distinktive boot printz - kuz he gotz da Big Red Bootz onna wrong rootz :rolleyes:.

Meenzwhile, Floppie Earz da Jack@ss has jumped da fence an gallupied round da howze an meetz up wiff Poppa Triffid, who...

.... drops the net and sends klamz flying. Poppa lets out a scream and klopz off in da other direction because Floppie Earz da Jack@ss thinks Poppa is a clump of hay wearing phireman's boots and wants to eat Poppa. Da klamz stagger around dizzily having hit their shells together and knocked themselves silly.
Meanwhile ...

[Barbara]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by wolflady
[B]http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/rofl.gif
How on EARTH did I miss this thread! What great entertainment!!!

....
I agree -I suppose the title "Dear Phred.." did not have enough information in it. It's a pity there is no clam juice over here. And an anchovy could be way too dead for my boys. But of course they ask for any fish stuff we prepare here: salmon, smoked local "renken" that we get from a fisher here at one of the lakes (Filou helps to skin it), shrimp, of course they would like lobster if they got it and as far Filou is concerned he even checks Thai Tom Yam Gung (He's South East Asian in his heart)

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Sorry MOFF, I'm not creative enough to continue the story, but I was just wondering....


It's been almost a month now since the klam juz showed up at Phred's house and not only Boots the Kat, but Cinder
and Smokey rejected it and it was left, with the cap tightly on, in the refrigerator. Ever since then we've been trying to figure out what Phred should do with it....but we haven't heard what ever actually happened to it. Are the squished clams still in Phred's refrigerator? Did they get out and turn into Triffidz? Did Phred acidentally drop the jar when trying to get rid of it and the whole house has passed out from the stench?

Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!? :eek: :eek:

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom

Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!? :eek: :eek:
As far as I know it's still lurking in the back of Phred's fridge. That's how the story got started. We were all giving 'helpful' hints as to what to do with it.
Only the SHADOW knows for sure (aka Phred)...:D

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by Tubby & Peanut's Mom
Pleeeaaasssseee....we gotta know....what happened to the klam juz??!?!? :eek: :eek: [/B]

Yur askin us????

Last thing we hurd wuz...

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
.... drops the net and sends klamz flying. Poppa lets out a scream and klopz off in da other direction because Floppie Earz da Jack@ss thinks Poppa is a clump of hay wearing phireman's boots and wants to eat Poppa. Da klamz stagger around dizzily having hit their shells together and knocked themselves silly.
Meanwhile ...

That putz da Klamz stumblin round inna frunt yard, wiff Poppa Triffid tryin ta gather em up whilst dodgin his Trustee Steed Floopie Earz da Jack@ss, who'z trin ta *EET* Poppa...

Den we gotz da preevius rumer dat derz CASEZ a Klam Juice frum Edwina inna klozet :eek:!

Jest last week Dad tried ta pawn off da Jug a Klam Juz, onlee slightlie uzed, onna guyz that steal our stuff offa curb ebery week - but dey had a big sine onna truk whut sed "We Take NO Klamz!"

Kat'z alluz leanin inna fridge tryin ta *grab* hiz bagga Temptations - we'll get him to see if ennie Klamz are left in der or they all got out wiff Klaire. :rolleyes:

[smokey the elder]

Maybe the "people who steal stuff off the curb" won't accept Klam Juz because it's considered toxic waste!:D Maybe Phred should get someone who's Hazmat trained from the FD to dispose of it for him...:rolleyes:

[gini]

Floppie Earz da Jack@ss in his pursuit of a good meal (Poppa Triffid) stumbles over da Klams and falls Kaboom......on his earz..............

Meanwhile Katz has opened the fridge - spies his Temptations - but way in the back of the fridge something is moving towards him and he lets out a horrible howwllllll and..............................

[momoffuzzyfaces]

And...
slams the door shut. Such a sight he saw!!! EGGS!!
EGGS!! EGGS!!! EGGS DANCING!!! EGGS RUNNING AMOK!!! EGGS GOT LEGS!!! WHO WOULD'A THOUGHT IT!!!

Boots shuddered.
Meanwhile, Dr. Nilsbokken (the kumquat), and SmokeyMutt........

[Edwina's Secretary]

were dressed in matching polyester powder blue tuxedos and singing -- in harmony --"Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me) while....

[zippy-kat]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
were dressed in matching polyester powder blue tuxedos and singing -- in harmony --"Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me) while....

Cinder, tapping into her feminine 6th sense (or is that scent?) pawzes whatever-it-was-we-left-her-doing and begins to sing...


NutRat Love

(need a 'splanashun/lyrics? see Cinder pullz a DUMM stunt (lyrics on page 3) (http://petoftheday.com/talk/showthread.php?threadid=13567&perpage=15&pagenumber=1) )

[lbaker]

OH NO :eek: Cinners DUM STUNTZ musta bin whilst i was on my "hiatus" cuz i mized that one........ now i'm soooo confuzed bout where i iz:confused: and no time rite now to ketchup... chek bak atcha later but don't put yur poly Ester's away yet...i'm looking for some white patten leathers belts and go-go boots so's i can get witcha program here...:rolleyes: what's witcha bonked clam heads ... huh
:confused:

[gini]

Originally posted by Edwina's Secretary
were dressed in matching polyester powder blue tuxedos and singing -- in harmony --"Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me) while....

I just have to pull away from the story for a minute to tell you that this had me rolling on the floor!! Such a vision!! (thanks, Sara)

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Does anyone know if the toxic clam juice has been safely disposed of? I had nightmares of Santa getting a glass of clam juice with his Christmas cookies. It put Phred and his whole household on the 'Naughty' list for ever!!!:eek: :D

[AmberLee]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces
...It [could] put Phred and his whole household on the 'Naughty' list for ever!!!...

:eek: !
Oh, my! With a threat like this, can't you just see poor Cinder donning a HazMat suit and turning that juuze over to the state pronto? Hee, hee, hee

:D ;) :D

[lbaker]

.........clam juice with his Christmas cookies:eek: and what kind of cookies go with clam juice:confused: maybe........HOOF COOKIES! oh my.....

[Randi]

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid42/p07d56992e7f7b868d2668d31ef867c0f/fcec3869.jpg

Mysterious clam-eater spotted in
Sevillian dive!

Our intrepid crime reporters were on a study trip in
the depths of the Andalucian capital, when they
happened upon this amazing incident.
“After battling our way through the tiny back streets
of this mysterious town, we were in dire need of
some refreshment, and found a dark, seedy little
joint well away from the tourist throngs, deep in the
heart of downtown Sevilla. Imagine our surprise
when we found out that illicit clam eating was in
progress in the back room of the establishment.
Our brave cameraman, using concealed camera
techniques, managed to get a single shot of this
act before we were summarily evicted.”
We ask: Who is this mysterious woman? What on
earth persuaded her to live her life so dangerously?
Was this primitive custom catching on? Would we
soon be seeing this awful habit spreading to our
children and loved ones? Where will it all end?
The implications are huge, and may even mean the
end of civilisation as we know it.

We have now opened a hot line directly to “The
Clam Weekly News” in order that worried parents
can check up and assure themselves that their
children are not suffering from this dreaded disorder.

Anybody seeing something like this on other peoples
plates should immediately contact their local law
enforcement agency.

j & r reporting from Seville

[lynnestankard]

ROTFL!!!

Quick Cinder and Smoke - get that dratted juice outta the house and buried!! Can't have Santa being poisoned and unable to deliver his cargo to all the children - it'd be a catastrophy!!

Lynne

[gini]

Well, now that is a thought - we could just help Phred round up all of those awful Klamz and send them OVERSEAS! (Seville perhaps?)

Or maybe Phred could wait very quietly for Santa to arrive and he could slip 'em all into Santa's sleigh and then watch Santa whisk 'em up into the night sky - never to be seen again!

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by gini

Or maybe Phred could wait very quietly for Santa to arrive and he could slip 'em all into Santa's sleigh and then watch Santa whisk 'em up into the night sky - never to be seen again!

Unless Santa had a 'senior moment' and started dropping them down everyone's chimneys or putting them under the Christmas trees or putting them in the stockings. Can you imagine reaching into your stocking and grabbing a handful of squishy clams!!!!! YUCK!!!:eek: :eek: :D

[Randi]

Originally posted by gini
Well, now that is a thought - we could just help Phred round up all of those awful Klamz and send them OVERSEAS! (Seville perhaps?)
Our dear Phred better not do that - it'll soon be New Year and the season for FRESH Oysters here! :D :D :D

[zippy-kat]

Originally posted by momoffuzzyfaces


[b]Unless Santa had a 'senior moment' and started dropping them down everyone's chimneys

do ya suppose those suckers would ignite/explode? Christmas might look like the 4th of July! (:eek: sez Phred and all his Firepals! lol)

[smokey the elder]

You could send the evil clam juice postage paid to Saddam Houssein.;) :D

[lynnestankard]

HE HE HE HE!! Great ideas!

Lynne

[NoahsMommy]

Originally posted by smokey the elder
You could send the evil clam juice postage paid to Saddam Houssein.;) :D
DO it!!! :D :D :D

[gini]

Would that then prove that he has weapons of mass destruction?

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Originally posted by gini
Would that then prove that he has weapons of mass destruction?

Not sure, but months old klamjuz might be considered some kind of biological weapon? ;)

[Randi]

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid42/pbc29903f4629b7722c7e7bac2a719168/fceb0a31.jpg

Clams star in popular TV show
Tragedy struck TV's "Sesame Street" Monday when
the neighborly Gordon was killed in an apparent
clam-related police shooting.
Though toxicology test results are still pending,
Gordon apparently was under the influence of
clams bought moments earlier from a dealer whom
witnesses identified only as Lefty the Shifty Sales-
man, when he flew into a rage and began strangling
the furry red monster Elmo, said Detective Sherlock
Hemlock of the Sesame Street Police Department's
Clam Squad.

"I guess he'd just had enough of that annoying little
****," said Oscar The Grouch, a resident of Sesame
Street who witnessed the incident. After Cookie
Monster, another resident, called the police, Officers
Biff and Sully arrived on the scene and shot Gordon
eight times. He was pronounced dead moments later.
Although there initially was some dispute over the
number of shots fired, Count Von Count, another
witness, said he was sure there were eight. "I love
to count," he told The Weekly Clam News. "Ah ha ha
ha! Vun! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Eight!"

Gordon's death echoes that of kindly storekeeper
Mr. Hooper, who was killed in a similar clam-related
incident nearly 20 years ago. Roosevelt Franklin, a
member of the street gang the Purple Clams, was
arrested and charged, and is currently serving a
30-year prison sentence. At the time, Franklin
claimed he had been aiming for Ernie and Bert, two
members of a rival gang. Neither was injured.
Lefty the Shifty Salesman declined comment on the
tragedy, although he did ask TCWN reporters if they
would like to buy an "8."
Big Bird, another resident of the street, said the show
will make reference to the tragedy in an effort to help
inner-city children cope with clam violence in their own
neighborhoods.

"Crime, crack and clams all start with C," he said.

[Randi]

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid43/paa79a8ef59766602c056b784174f95ce/fce95519.jpg

Santas' Christmas Clams

To celebrate this joyous season, here are some of
our more entertaining Christmas bloopers:
Ralph Johnson used this tagline in an ad. for his auto
repair shop. "Try us once, you'll never go anywhere
again"
And just to show we don't really proof the classifieds:
"Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children."
And speaking of eating children, we ran this in an ad.
for Edwina's Restaurant: "Dinner Special -
Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00"

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid43/p5d0baee21e5cd2e3a0e7340151808998/fce9562c.jpg

And here is the latest news from our
foreign correspondant;

Clam Antivirus 2002-08-04 15:13 by Tomclamsz Kojm
Clam Antivirus jest Pet Talk wydajnym i otwartym
clams pakietem antywirusowym. Zawiera skaner,
narze?dzie do tworzenia sygnatur oraz do clams uak-
tualniania bazy Edwina przez Internet.
Uz?ywa bardzo clams szybkiego algorytmu wyszuk-
iwania wzorca, skanuje pliki clams wewna Pet Talk trz
archiwów, jest obs?ugiwany przez popularne programy
do skanowania poczty, kompiluje clams sie? na kaz?dym
systemie wspieraja?cym PHRED, wykorzystuje wa?tki, a
w przypadku Linuksa sam je konfiguruje clams.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Randi

And here is the latest news from our
foreign correspondant;

Clam Antivirus 2002-08-04 15:13 by Tomclamsz Kojm
Clam Antivirus jest Pet Talk wydajnym i otwartym
clams pakietem antywirusowym. Zawiera skaner,
narze?dzie do tworzenia sygnatur oraz do clams uak-
tualniania bazy Edwina przez Internet.
Uz?ywa bardzo clams szybkiego algorytmu wyszuk-
iwania wzorca, skanuje pliki clams wewna Pet Talk trz
archiwów, jest obs?ugiwany przez popularne programy
do skanowania poczty, kompiluje clams sie? na kaz?dym
systemie wspieraja?cym PHRED, wykorzystuje wa?tki, a
w przypadku Linuksa sam je konfiguruje clams.

OOOOO, I have a headache. I had trouble deciphering all that. Let's see, all I got was: Baby Edwina is president of the Internet. Something about clams and Phred. Maybe Phred is going to be vice president of the Internet and clams will run amok? HELP!!!!:eek: :D

OMG , I am ROTFLMAO !!!!! I had never been on a thread about Phred .... IT IS HILARIOUS !!! And Randi , this picture made my whole household here wondering if their mommy was going nuts or so ....http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid35/pd672f04607fb6b372c5c163b0522d187/fd2c9ae9.jpg

Well , to tell the truth , may be , maybe they are a bit right .... (A BIT !!!!!);) :p :p http://www.geocities.com/SiliconValley/6603/animation/frogana1.gif

[cassiesmom]

Dear Phred,

The supermarket by my house has had a display for the past few weeks of "hard to find" holiday ingredients, right at the front of the store.

Guess what's on the shelf, right at eye level? Clam juice. Or would that be klamjuz?

Guess who thought of Phred and this thread? Me.

Happy New Year,
Elyse

[emily_the_spoiled]

This was definitely one of the classic threads on PT :D

God bless you Phred

[Laura's Babies]

Whenever we miss him, this is a great way to bring him back to us. He was one in a million!!

[Edwina's Secretary]

Those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end, we'd sing and dance forever and a day...

<<sniff>>

I still have the original bottle of clam juice in my cupboard... <<sniff>>

[Cataholic]

Miss you tons!