Dog lover with fear of dogs...Can anyone help?

[MoonandBean]

This was posted on dogster in one of Sunny's pals diaries. I told her I would crosspost it here as there are so many smart people here :) I will forward her all responses. Thanks!

I wanted to put this in a forum but I dont know where to put it so I am just going to put it here.

Growing up, I was never raised around dogs or cats or animals for that matter. I always wished I had. But when I was 10 I was severly attacked by a dog. It was my neighbors dog that was locked up in an outdoor kennel only to get attention when given its daily food. I felt sorry for the poor pup but at 10 there was nothing I could do. Well one day he let it out into the fenced in yard to clean the kennel (I found this part out later). I was riding my bike down the road when the dog went after me on my bike. I got bite in several spots, and my feet got caught in the spokes and it tore them up pretty bad. The owner got the dog off me and called an ambulance. The dog was sadly euthed because of how bad the attack was.

I wanted to edit to add that I do not blame this dog. It wasnt his fault his owner was an idiot. This poor pup lived his life without love. I feel bad for the both of us for what happened but mostly for him. He probally felt scared by me on my bike. Now I am just scared. I am too scared to take my kids outside where a dog could be without another adult or my hubby there. We only go to beaches where dogs are not allowed, same for parks and am terrified to go for walks on my own or just play in own yard. A few years ago I became afraid of my house because my neighbors dog got off his chain and I was in the middle of the road after checking my mail. I couldnt move. He was friendly but I just couldnt move because I didnt know it at that time. I froze and almost was hit by a car. The dog has since passed away from old age, but it reminded me the day we moved in this place why I was afraid at my old place.

Since then I was emotionally scared. I am terrified of dogs. All sizes. I am fine when they are on leash, with their owner or on a tie out. But if they are off leash even in their own yard with no owner in site I panic. I have a paralizing fear. I have tried for 20 years to get over it, but I just have not been able to and dont know how to.

I love dogs, all dogs with my entire heart. I wish I wasnt scared of them. But, its really bad.

Tonight it set it off bad. I was walking sam and soldier with my husband and kids. A black lab came running out of his front door with no owner and approached us. I couldnt breath, couldnt move, couldnt talk. My arms went numb and I was eventually hyperventalating. The owner evenutally came out and got the dog. It was friendly enough but I was terrified.

I dont know how to get past this. I wish I could remove this fear. I just dont know how. I love dogs. I should feel safe, I have a huge dog. I dont when they are off leash coming at me. I have been told to carry mace, or a walking stick but none of that would help me. My fear is like a straight jacket, where I cant move, speak or breath. This fear fallows me everywhere and I dont know how to get out from under this black cloud that I carry everywhere. It is exhausting. It's embarassing, and I get dirty looks when it happens, and people say I shouldnt have dogs, but I love them. I am just also afraid of them as well.

If anyone knows how to get over this fear I would really appreciate it.

[dreamparkingspace]

I am also a dog lover with a slight fear of dogs (certain breeds mostly). For example, my friend has 5 Dobermans (no joke) and I just find the appearance of that particular breed a tad intimidating, they're just so lean, muscular, and serious-looking. Then when they bark it is such a dominant and loud sound that I almost flinch. I know that probably sounds kinda odd, seeing as how one of my dogs looks almost like a purebred German Shepherd (obviously a powerful breed as well), but maybe television has drilled into my head that GSD's are heroes and Dobermans are villains, er something. Rottweilers, Pitbulls, and Akitas I also find intimidating, among a couple other breeds. I remember there was an episode of Dog Whisperer once (and I don't want to start any arguments on why everyone loves or hates Cesar, I'm just bringing this up to make a point) about a woman with panic disorder who got exposed to Cesar's pack, particularly his Pitbulls because she too was a dog lover with a fear of dogs, like Pitbulls, and after enough exposure to Cesar's powerful yet extremely friendly dogs she overcame her fear with time. I know I personally always had issues with social phobia type stuff, and I don't mean just giving a speech or something that everyone kinda fears, but simply leaving the house used to be rough for me. I don't know how severe your anxiety is, only you do, but go see a local dog trainer and start exposing yourself to friendly chihuahuas then work your way up to exposing yourself to happy go lucky English mastiffs. I do know when I am scared around certain dogs I swear they can tell...

[K9karen]

I'm also intimidated by certain breeds, but that never stops me from asking permission to pet someone's dog. It's also another reason I go to the dog park, to watch them interact and try to learn more about different breeds.

I agree, though, that a dog off the leash, running towards you, is a scary thing. I don't care how friendly the dog is. I don't know that when I'm about to be pounced on! I can't tolerate such irresponsibility from a pet owner.

I remember being taught to stand completely still like a tree.

I feel bad for your friend, but, after my *incident*, I know how she feels. Nothing in the world can erase that kind of memory.

[Dee M]

I agree with dreamparkingplace that your friend will need to slowly expose herself to dogs in order to overcome her fear. However, there are a few things I think she should do before that.

The first thing is to learn how to meditate, and start doing it daily. Then, learn some relaxation exercises. Do these daily until they are second nature. Remember, that she will be paralyzed with fear, so she will need to be able to relax herself almost automatically. She might also try telling herself daily that she is not afraid of dogs, that they will not hurt her, that she knows what to do if a dog comes at her, etc. (This self talk sounds crazy but it works) Then slowly, expose herself to dogs.

This is coming from someone who has been there. It takes lots of time and patience but the feeling of success at the end is worth it. I hope she is able to conquer this. I will keep her in my thoughts.

[Moesha]

My youngest sister was attacked on our front porch by the neighbor's dog when she was 4. She had several bite marks on her head. She had a psychologist from Vanderbilt come out for several sessions. She was part of a study. I can't remember everything that he did with her, but I do remember one of the exercises was that she had to stay outside with our other neighbor's Great Pyrenees for increasing amounts of time. He was a very friendly, yet obviously huge, dog, especially compared to my very petite 4 year old sister. The whole process really helped her. It may have been so beneficial because of her age at the time. I do remember that after the sessions were all over, each of the other siblings got to pick a cassette that the doctor purchased for us as a thank you for helping out. (YaY George Strait!) Perhaps there may be some information to look up online.

[MoonandBean]

Thanks y'all (hehe...Moesha inspired me to talk country...yay George Strait). I have forwarded this thread to my pal on dogster.

[Jags mom]

I had one experience with 2 GSDs and my brother. Ever since i was little i would get to a dog before it got to me(my mom always tried to stop me), but with my uncles 2 dogs i was the first to run up to pet them, not asking(bad i know) but they were very friendly to me. when my brother came ripping around the corner and stoped dead in his tracks because he was scared, the dogs started growling at him, sencing his insecurity. Being scared can be a harmful thing to yourself when confronted by a more dominent dog. I personally am more scared to pet small dogs than the most muscular pits or presa canarios. Being a dog groomer i know first hand that the little guys can be more nasty than the big guys. But I really wish i could help with a situation like that. its horrible being that scared or situations(ive got severe stage frieght). i hope the best to your friend