View Full Version : Holiday idea needed

11-04-2008, 10:49 AM
I think this sounds so sad, but I don't know what to do except ask on here for ideas.

Growing up, we always went to my Dad's parents home for the holidays. (Mum's family were in England so it wasn't an option.) depending on which other families could make it (some of them had to alternate) we were 15 to 22 people around the table. I always thought this would carry on to my generation, but it hasn't.

Mum died 15 years back. Neither my bro nor I ever married or had any children. So holidays are pretty much like any alternate Sunday: Just the 3 of us at the table.:(

I wish I knew some way to get a few folks to join us. Taking Dad to someone else's home is not an option any longer. (My cousins are all at least an hour and half drive away, and my cousins are all grandparents now! So they have full tables.)

I had planned to seek out and get to know someone from our church; but the past year with Dad declining, we haven't even been to church in months. (We want Mass on TV).

Thanks for listening.

11-04-2008, 11:14 AM
Talk to your local priest, he may be able to connect you with others who will be alone for the holiday. That's probably your best option, unless there are community groups you are involved in ...

Daisy and Delilah
11-04-2008, 01:41 PM
Awwwwww.....Sandie, knowing what a wonderful humanitarian and animal lover you are, this is incredibly sad. I am taken aback by this story. While alot of people complain for having to cook for too many, you are seeking people to join your celebration.
If that isn't the sign of a great person, I don't know what is. I hope you find at least a dozen folks to join you. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

p.s. I wish I was closer to you.

11-04-2008, 01:45 PM
if any closer.. IŽd invite you over.... hey, why not take a vaction and do come over :D

11-04-2008, 02:44 PM
I understand what you're experiencing, Sandy. When I was married, I always had a house full during the holidays. I've been divorced now for 12 years, both of my parents have passed on and all of my siblings, too, except for one sister who lives in PA but you'd think she lives in outer Mongolia the way she talks about the long (3 hour) drive here. She's a widow, has no pets, and it would be easy for her to drive here, even take the Greyhound but she won't do it. I can't ask my cat sitter to watch the Fur Posse during the holidays because that's a real imposition and I'm also afraid to leave Pidgelet. My son lives across the country and this is the first Thanksgiving in 11 years that he'll be home and yet I still can't get her to come. I've always made it a practice to invite those who have nowhere to go during the holidays but even those people have either moved or passed on. For some reason, I don't get invitations, even though I've entertained others all my life. So it looks like this year it'll be my son and me. I shudder to think how lonely it would be if he wasn't coming home. Yours is a special situation due to your dad's illness and so all I can do is offer my understanding and prayers and remind you that we're never truly alone. Keep the faythe.

Scooter's Mom
11-04-2008, 08:09 PM
Sandie, I'm in almost the same boat.
Most years it is just me and DH. We can't have kids, so our family won't grow... it does get lonely for me (DH doesn't care, he likes being alone). All of my family is in Texas, and my in-law's don't "do" holidays much. They go camp in the desert and play.

I don't have any advice for you... but wanted to let you know you're not alone.

Sending you some happy thoughts and ((hugs)).

11-04-2008, 08:36 PM
Here we have a Senior Citizen's Center, where older people can go to socialize, eat lunch and participate in activities. It's not a residential care center - these people either drive or take the bus, they live in their own homes.

Is there something like that in your town? If so, I would recommend calling and talking to the director. Explain your situation, and that you would love to have some company for the holiday dinners. I am sure there are seniors who would otherwise spend the holidays alone who would love the opportunity to join you. You could make some new lifelong friends and start new holiday traditions.

You could try asking the same thing at churches as well.

11-04-2008, 09:56 PM
This might be crazy, but maybe post an add on craigslist or in your local newspaper, telling the situation. I would also try a church.

I am sorry you are in this situation.. Guess this year I wont complain so much about having to visit 5 houses.

I wish you were closer. I would LOVE to have you, your Dad, and the pets over!

11-04-2008, 11:19 PM
This might be crazy, but maybe post an add on craigslist or in your local newspaper, telling the situation.

I'd be very cautious doing that. I'd go through an established, local brick-and-mortar organization instead. You honestly could get some very strange, at best, and dangerous, at worst, people answering a craigslist ad. The internet is wonderful for some things, but scary for others.

11-05-2008, 12:09 AM
That is true. Maybe put an ad in the newspaper, and try to match families with others without people to celebrate with!

11-05-2008, 09:38 AM
I have a very large family, and this isn't an issue. BUT, sometimes, I would like to just sit at home and do nothing.

What I think might be nice for you, and it is an idea that I did a slight variation on....take a care package to an outfit that WILL be working that day, and make it special for them. I think you will get some serious returns there.

When Dakky was undergoing his blockage issues last year, he had to spend the 3 days before Christmas at the ER Vet. They allowed me to pick him up on Christmas Day. I took in a huge basket of ready to eat stuff, stuff that could go in the micro, stuff that could sit out without spoiling, etc. The ER clinic seemed very pleased with it.

Maybe you could do that to a couple of local places around you? Just a thought.

11-06-2008, 08:34 PM
How about throwing a party and inviting all? Maybe not on the 24th but a week before of even after. You could have an ornament exchange or a white elephant gift exchange. My holiday party will be the end of January because that is when my son comes home. Most people ask what they can bring.