critter crazy
06-30-2007, 09:35 PM
Some new, some old, all sad! They Walk Among Us!
Be careful, be v-e-r-y careful....
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: Hubby and I had to have the garage door repaired. The
Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a
"large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we
had the largest one Sears made at that time, a ½ horsepower. He shook his
head and said, "Lady, you need a ¼ horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was
larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not. Four is larger than two." We
haven't used Sears repair since.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the
removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer
are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place
for them to be crossing anymore." From Kingman , KS
__________________________________________________ ____
DOLTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a
taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He
said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. Yep...From Kansas City !
__________________________________________________ ____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without
your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
__________________________________________________ ____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker
of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it
signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What
on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in
Wichita , KS
__________________________________________________ _____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker:
She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word
was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
__________________________________________________ _____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip
back into itself, and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why
her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs
office no less.
__________________________________________________ ______
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to
unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
"Hey," I announced to the technician, "Its open!" His reply, "I know - I
already got that side." This was at the Ford
dealership in Canton , Mississippi !
http://utenti.lycos.it/eddietf/homer_doh.gif
Be careful, be v-e-r-y careful....
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: Hubby and I had to have the garage door repaired. The
Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a
"large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we
had the largest one Sears made at that time, a ½ horsepower. He shook his
head and said, "Lady, you need a ¼ horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was
larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not. Four is larger than two." We
haven't used Sears repair since.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the
removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer
are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place
for them to be crossing anymore." From Kingman , KS
__________________________________________________ ____
DOLTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a
taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He
said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg. Yep...From Kansas City !
__________________________________________________ ____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without
your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how
would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
__________________________________________________ ____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker
of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it
signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What
on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in
Wichita , KS
__________________________________________________ _____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker:
She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word
was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
__________________________________________________ _____
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip
back into itself, and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why
her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs
office no less.
__________________________________________________ ______
DUMB-TE DUMB-DUMB!: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to
unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
"Hey," I announced to the technician, "Its open!" His reply, "I know - I
already got that side." This was at the Ford
dealership in Canton , Mississippi !
http://utenti.lycos.it/eddietf/homer_doh.gif