lv4dogs
05-03-2006, 10:25 AM
Headlines for the year 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the
seventhlargest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as
California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as
Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops
and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the
AmericanTerritoryof the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and
Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at
least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by
Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be
imported
legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and
reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-years, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to
weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast
shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
(Hummmmmmmmm)
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their
civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal
political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the
seventhlargest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as
California.
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as
Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops
and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the
AmericanTerritoryof the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and
Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at
least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by
Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be
imported
legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and
reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-years, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to
weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast
shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
(Hummmmmmmmm)
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their
civil rights.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal
political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.