Bad news for Ralph Syracuse

[kb2yjx]

I am very sorry that I kinda left you all just hanging, but I wanted to a) pull myself together before I posted and, b) get all the info I could from the vet.
Ralph weighed in on Monday for his dental at 7.8 pounds. A loss of a half of pound since 3/21. Since the pancreatitis episode, he has been steadily losing weigh which was attributed to vomiting and not eating with his usual gusto. No masses were seen on his ultrasound done in February. However, while Ralph was under anesthesia, the vet was able to palpate his abdomen. She said his intestines were " thick and ropey, " which are not the way they normally feel. Considering Ralph's overall status of weigh loss, loss of appetite, vomiting, etc...the vet thinks that Ralph has intestinal lymphoma. She expalined that he would have to have abdominal surgery to get a section of the intestine for biopsy/diagnosis. Then there would be the chemo and bloodwork. Or if that was not the way to go, then Ralph would be put on prednisone to allay the symptoms.
Needless to say, it was as if someone pulled the rug out from under Barry and me. We had more questions once we got Ralph home. I asked the vet. And got the answers. The chemo would be initially a twice a week event. Weekly blood work. And there is always the chance it might not work.
Barry and I decided NOT to go that route. Ralph has been started on the prednisone. We know Ralph fairly well(after nearly 14 yrs), and KNOW that is not the way to have Ralph treated. If he were younger and in better shape(he has a bad heart). Cachexia(wasting way, happens in cancer patients), is Ralph. Right now, Ralph is comfortable. He is happy to be in his house, napping in HIS Grainger box, and not carted about, he is eating, and that is what we want for Ralph. We do not know how long he has, but it will be good quality time. I remember telling Boo when she was nearing the end, I cannot make you better, you are not going to get better, and you are not going to live forever. But I promise you your dignity and no pain. That is what we are going to give Ralph(who is sitting on my lap, purring away). We love him very much. I said to Barry how many cats do you know have vacationed 13 years on Cape Cod?? Ralph was a wonderful therapy cat, an award winner. He has lived a very good life, and will continue to do so for as long as possible.
This has not been an easy decision for us to make. And knowing Ralph, he could fool us all...after is is my ORANGEMAN! Sandra

[jenluckenbach]

{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

As I sit here with tears in my eyes, I reasure you that I would be doing the exact same things as you are for Ralph.

Keep him, and love him for as long as he is comfortable, and you will have wonderful memories for the rest of your days.

I am sorry the news is not better, but it is not time to grieve yet. Keep the days happy. enjoy your little boy.

[Catty1]

I do hope Ralphie can surprise us...he has been quite the trooper in the past.

So prednisone will just allay the symptoms? Keeping Ralph comfy is the most important thing.

I just hope he will surprise you and us - or may be able to try another remedy...

HUGS to you, and give that purring orange boy a tummy rub for me!
Catty1

[catmandu]

Sandra you know taht The Found Ctas and I are Praying as hard as we can for Ralph.
As much joy and love as thier is to being a Pet Guardian there this moment when you have to make that terrible decision about your Pet.
We pray that Ralph can recover and you will have more time together.
I look at Michael,Princess and BoBo,and JJJ3 sometimes and wonder what I will do when thier time comes.
I hope I handle this as well as you are doing.
God Bless You,Barry and Ralph.

[Kirsten]

((((((((Oh Sandra))))))))

I cannot say anymore at the moment... :(

Kirsten

[Barbara]

Sandra, I am so very sorry.
I must admit however that I would look at things in the same way. I would never put a 14 year old kitty through that much surgery and bloodwork and chemo as I believe a cat is ready to go when it is time- it is just us who are not ready :( :( :(

I hope that Ralph's remaining time is happy and painless- he will love you for that.

{{{{{Hugs}}}}}

[Killearn Kitties]

Oh Sandra, I'm so sorry that the news about Ralph isn't better. I know that his remaining time will be as happy and comfortable as you can possibly make it.

One day, you must tell us more about Ralph, his Cape Cod trips and his therapy honours, for example. He sounds such a character.

Lots of hugs.

[catnapper]

(((HUGS))) What a hard thing to hear and I'm so glad you are going to take the route you're taking - I would have as well. Many prayers for you and Ralph

[furrykidsmother]

I know it wasn't an easy decision, but I am sure it is the best one for him. I hope that Ralph will surprise you and be with you for quite some time to come.

[smokey the elder]

I'm so sorry about Ralph. I think he'll appreciate not going through all that stuff.

[Donnaj4962]

I am so sorry to hear the news about Ralph. I would have made the same decision as you, despite it being a hard one to make. Ralph knows he is loved!

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

I'm so sorry to hear this latest sad news about Ralph. :(

I would do the exact same thing if I were in your shoes, and I might just end up in your shoes one of these days with Peanut since she has "some sort of malignancy" in her bladder. She has been doing extremely well for almost a year now since her surgery, but I think I'm starting to see the Cachexia(wasting away) that you mention. I look at it as I have been put on notice. Peanut will not be around forever, so she needs to be extra spoiled and pampered and spoiled and smooched on and spoiled and spoiled and spoiled.....

I think the same is true with Ralph now. If he so enjoys sitting on your lap and purring, make sure he has a lap available to him as often as possible. If he loves napping in HIS Grainger box ( :D ), make sure the box is always available to him, and if possible, maybe get one or two more around for him. Do whatever you can think of to make his remaining days as happy and loved as possible. ......but I know you'd do that anyway.

Prednisone can be a wonderful thing, so hopefully it will make Ralph comfortable and delay the inevitable for many many months to come.


{{{hugs}}}

[kb2yjx]

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH for your very kind words of comfort and encouragement!!!
I came home from the clinic, and found Barry's report of how breakfast went this morning. Apparently, Ralph did well. So that is good. O, yes, he is being spoiled!!! I have all sorts of concotions ready for him to eat. He also gets first dibs at the sliders so he can have the best place in the sun and catch the breeze.
Our laps are ready and will to have Ralph on them at ALL times!!! Sometimes he is content to just sit beside Barry and me, and allow lap time for a few of the other cats. I am learning alot from the cats. Ralph has been the TOP cat in the house for YEARS!!! I think the others know he is getting weak, but not one of them has challenged Ralph's status. Even Riley, who has " respect " problems, is not bothering Ralph.
I am so sorry to hear about Peanut!!! You will do the RIGHT thing!!! I sat down and was ready to break into the vacation monies that I have put aside for a trip in the fall to use it to treat Ralph. Then I found out what was entailed. I just could not do that to Ralph(and I would not want that done to me if my time was limited).
Ralph has ANOTHER Grainger box!!! I swiped the box when leaving work a few weeks ago!!! The guys from the maintaince dept. at the hospital asked why I wanted the box, so I told them. There is a photo of Ralph in HIS Grainger box hanging in their office!
I better end here. Ralph has just draped his entire body over my left arm.
He purrs his gratitude to you all!!!! Sandra & Ralphie

[Sevaede]

:( *hugs*

There is not much that I can say because I want you to know that the solace I, and everyone else, offer is real. It feels awkward to step around the words to not try and seem phony during this time, because that is the last thing I want to do, instill fake sincerity. Bleh. What I am trying to say is I (and everyone else) understand how you feel, having lost three pets in the last year. I believe you are doing the right thing. Try not to dwell on the sad things because I think that may make things harder. Give him kisses, sing to him, and give him extra catnip from all of us! :)

[Kirsten]

Sandra, I'm thinking a lot of you and Ralph these days, and it's good to hear that Ralph is doing well and enjoying his time with his family.

I also wanted to say that I think you did the right thing. I don't think I would put a cat of his age through the ordeal of the chemo. I hope he will be around you for many many more months.

Kirsten

[kb2yjx]

Again, thank you all for your kind words. I think the prednisone has kicked in. Ralph was like him old self today, getting into things and trouble!! I had to yell at him for biting Nicholas' ear after he licked it!!! He did great at supper, cleaned the plate. I hope there are more days like today! Sandra

[Cataholic]

Thinking of you and Ralph fondly. Hugs to you, and scritchies to him, and may his time, however long, be filled with your love.

[krazyaboutkatz]

I'm so sorry to hear about Ralph.:( I just wanted to let you know that you made the right decision. He deserves to be spoiled, pampered, and loved and he'll let you know when it's time for him to go. I hope that the pred will allow him to remain with you and have good quality of life for a long time to come. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

[smokey the elder]

That's really great. At this stage the benefit of prednisone definitely outweigh the long term risks. He can probably have just about any food he wants, too.

{{Hugs}} to you and Ralph.

[rg_girlca]

I am so sorry to hear about your precious Ralph and I agree with the others that you guys made the right decision concerning him.
Sounds like the prednisone is doing it's job and that Ralph is comfortable.

Stay well Ralph for as long as you can. Headbumpies and kisses to you sweetie.

((((((HUGS)))))) Sandra & Barry

[TopCat3]

Sandra, I am so very sorry.
I must admit however that I would look at things in the same way. I would never put a 14 year old kitty through that much surgery and bloodwork and chemo as I believe a cat is ready to go when it is time- it is just us who are not ready :( :( :(

I hope that Ralph's remaining time is happy and painless- he will love you for that.

{{{{{Hugs}}}}}


Barbara, these are such wise words "I believe a cat is ready to go when it is time- it is just us who are not ready"
Thank you so much.

I am trying to make myself ready too. I don't wish to hi-jack Sandra's thread about Ralph, but she knows, because we are in contact, off here, that I am going through very similar with Cleo who is now on twice weekly fluids. It is all just palliative care, I know there cannot be too long to go and it is very, very hard and I have been unable to share this openly because I am so devastated.

Now back to Ralphie, I too believe this is the best and kindest choice to make to preserve his comfort and dignity. It is interesting how the other cats are respecting what he is going through. They just "know", don't they? it's happening in my house too. I have got to know Ralph well and seen many photos of him and I really feel for what he is going through and for his beloved guardians Sandra and Barry and my heart goes out to them, what's left of it anyway, as it is all in pieces at the moment, anyway Sandra Barry and Ralph and the rest of the Clan make what use you can of these pieces and know they are sent with much understanding because I am going through a similar thing and I still can't believe it either.

Sandra has asked me to post a photo for everyone to see the Clan on holiday at Cape Cod - something about resizing the picture it's just easier if I do it for her so here goes...

I've also put a couple of others in so we can celebrate Ralph's "character" and his life. For the good times...

[Catty1]

I LOVE that face, and the paw on the edge of the box!

I just had a PM from Sandra, and she said she was posting here shortly...I don't even really know Ralph, and my heart is breaking for him! Just look at that face!

Be comfortable and at peace, Ralph....when the time comes, maybe the vet will come to your house so you will feel at home...

I just want a miracle here so much! :(

Catty1

[tabbygirl]

Sweetie,

I know we (I ) cried yesterday about Ralphie but he's been such a part of all our conversations since we became friends so many years ago. Glad to have seen him in February when he looked fairly decent. Glad that you've chosen the easier way. Would not have been fair to have such a "guy" have his final days be in the vet's office more than home.

He will truly missed by us and our next visit will not be the same but we will keep going (as I write I am welling up again so I will stop now)

love tabbygirl

[kb2yjx]

TopCat!!! Thanks so much for posting ALL the photos!!! Yes, that is Ralph on vacation on Cape Cod in 2003. He is with Spunky(gray cat), Raven, and I think Norton. Where the rest of the Clan was at the time, I have no idea!!Perhaps in other windows!!! The Sisters at the Monastery refer to Ralph as the OPW(the Offical Pope Watcher)from his glued to the TV and computer when the Pope is on!! And, the HIS box photo!!!This is how we want to remember Ralph, Ralph the nut, Ralph the itty bitty kitty, and just Ralph!!
It was a bad evening yesterday and early afternoon. He vomited so badly!! I had given him fluids this afternoon, then he vomited. Ralph(so far)has kept down his supper. He is looking so thin, his hip bones are sticking out. But, the purr machine keeps going. I cannot even begin to think how he would do with all the needles and the chemo. Except for the vomiting, Ralph is fairly comfortable and that is how it will be. Thank you again for all the support and words. At the Easter Vigil at the Monastery at 11pm, you all will be remembered in our prayers....