||Jan the Boar
||Two years old|
||Silkie Guinea Pig|
||Eindhoven, Noord-Brabant, The Netherlands|
Jan the boar. The last name was added to emphasize my manliness
because I'm a you-know-what boar and also, because abroad some women
have the same name, and I don't want any confusion concerning my
gender!! I was born in Germany in a pet shop where nobody seemed to want
me so one day Janneke's mother walked in, and she saw that she could get
my cage at a very low price and me and my cagemate for free (teehee,
she's dutch, they love good bargains). I had bugs and my ears were in a
bad condition but she treated me and gave me and my cagemate the
ultimate Dutch names to represent a new start: Jan and Piet.
From then on, I decided to take matters into my own paws. When Christmas
came, her daughter Janneke visited and I liked her a lot. She told me
she couldn't have me because at that time, she had four girls, (wow! so
all the more reason to put my charms on her, I'm a real Casanova!). So
finally after a lot of wooing she gave in and took me home to her girls.
Wow, those were some pretty girls. So I initiated phase two of my plan.
I went on a hunger strike so that she would let me in the girl's cage.
She did not like that at all, and finally she brought me to the vet.
That vet sure was a hottie. I seduced her too and when I went home after
surgery, the girls of the vet clinic gave me two boxes of guinea pig
cookies "because I liked them so much" (honestly, I don't care for them
at all, but I'll do anything to make a girl, whatever species they are,
And now I live like a sultan with my own harem. My hobbies are eating,
rumblestrutting, relaxing and entertaining Janneke's visitors with some
interesting gymnastics. You can see me in the pigture on a heating
device; Janneke bought that for Yaya, one of my girls. Of course, Yaya
lets me use it. You can see her little butt in the pigture, I'm using it
as a pillow. I do not really have a rank in our herd. When we get food,
I eat last, I'm a gentle pig, no doubt. But when the girls fight, I'll
whump my big manly body between them and tell them I'm not allowing any
of that in my cage. I love lap time, I'm a silkie with a lot of hair and
I totally stretch out so that Janneke has a lap covered with hair. She
says I make a great piggy puddle. I hope that there are many more years
to come and that Janneke, some day, will finally cave for phase three of my
plan (more girls!).
Jan the Boar