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Thread: I had to give her back...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    3,250

    I had to give her back...

    I can't barely even see the screen to type. We had to give Lila back tonight. She was not getting along with Sam and Sam was becoming increasingly noticeably depressed. I feel absolutely hrorible but Lila deserves the best and I don't feel we can provide that to her at the moment.

    Please don't think I'm giving up easy. You have no idea the torment I've been going through. I broke out into hives last night and they've only gotten progressively worse today. My stomach is upset so badly that I've made an appt. with my gastro doctor. And I'm currently hypervenilating.

    I feel like scum. I wanted her to fit so badly but things were just going from bad to worse. I hope no one one here thinks poorly of me for this - I'm being hard enough on myself. I just had to do it for her benefit... I didn't want her growing up here and becoming aggressive (which she'd become increasingly so since earlier this week) and changing the Samantha I knew and loved. I think I'm doing the right thing... it's just the hardest decision I've ever had to make.

    Please keep Lila in your prayers that through Tails of Hope rescue, she is able to find a home that can provide what I couldn't.

    I'm so sorry dear Lila. I will always love you. Mommy will always love you.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Modesto, Ca
    Posts
    6,769
    I think you did the right thing. A dog is a huge commitment that will be in your family for a long time. You tried your best. Lila is a beautiful girl, I am sure that she'll find a wonderful home.


    Thank you Wolfie!

  3. #3
    I am soooooooo sorry that you had to give Lila away, she was such a beautiful pup. I kinda know how you feel, I had to give my Dalmatian away because my Dad hated her and I was so upset because I loved her so much and she was the best dog I had ever had, my new dog is almost as good as she was though.
    I hope Lila finds a good home! at least you gave her away knowing it was best for her. hopefully soon you will find another dog that gets along well with everyone in your family.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Iowa!
    Posts
    13,130
    I am sorry you had to give her back but glad that she wasn't there longer for you to get even more attached to her. And Samantha should be your first interest. Do you think you're rushing things on finding another dog? Just give it time and the right playmate for Samantha will come along. Try not to make yourself so sick over it.

    9/3/13
    I did the right thing by setting you free
    But the pain is very deep.
    If only I could turn back time, forever, you I'd keep.
    I miss you


    I hear you whimper in your sleep
    I gently pet you and say, no bad dreams
    It will be alright, to my dog as dark as night.

    Fur as dark as the night.
    Join me on this flight.
    Paws of love that follow me.
    In my heart you'll forever be.
    [/SIZE]



    How I wish I could hold you near.
    Turn back time to make it so.
    Hug you close and never let go.
    11/12/06




  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Ohio, USA
    Posts
    19,879
    I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out. I'm sure she'll find a loving forever home.
    And don't be so hard on yourself.

    Huney, Bon & Simba-missed so very much
    Remembering all the Rainbow Bridge Pets

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Posts
    10,060
    I am so sorry

    You did what you could and I'm sure you would've made it work out for you. But since it was affecting Samantha, I understand your decision. You have to look out for her first.

    I'm sure the rescue will find Lila a great home.

    When it comes time for another dog, maybe you could volunteer to foster for that (or another) rescue. Then while you're fostering dogs, you would be able to see how Sam reacts before you make the committment of adopting. Maybe Sam would feel more comfortable with an adult or an older puppy. I know those youngins can really be little buggers sometimes. Lolly gets really annoyed with a lot of my young puppy fosters.

    Please take care of yourself and don't worry yourself sick. You can follow up with the rescue and find out when she gets adopted I'm sure.
    Alyson
    Shiloh, Reece, Lolly, Skylar
    and fosters Snickers, Missy, Magic, Merlin, Maya

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Modesto, Ca
    Posts
    6,769
    That is a good idea, Aly. There would be less pets turned back if there was a way for everyone to take them for a test drive. It is harder to tell their temprament in the shelter.


    Thank you Wolfie!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Riding my bike somewhere...
    Posts
    26,408
    I'm so sorry Jaime. I don't believe you did anything wrong at all.

    I know how much you wanted Lila to work out..... some things just aren't possible.

    Maybe you could try and do some foster/volunteer work for the shelter? I'm not sure how that all works out, but possibly it may be good for finding "the one"



    {{Hugs to you and to Sam}}

    ~Kay, Athena, Ace, Kiara, Mufasa, & Alice!
    "So baby take a axe to your makeup kit
    Set ablaze the billboards and their advertisements
    Love with all your hearts and never forget
    How good it feels to be alive
    And strive for your desire"

    -rx bandits

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Upper penninsula Michigan
    Posts
    2,021
    I'm so sorry to hear that.

    Don't beat yourself up over it. You certainly didn't do her any harm. You gave it your best shot. I'm sure there's another dog out there for you, and there are other humans for her.

    Chin up!


    Thanks for the siggy, Lexi_Lover!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    7,885
    Oh, Jamie! I am sooooo sorry things didn't work out with Lila. Some things just aren't meant to be. I am so sorry. Hugs to you and Sam.

    Kaitlyn (the human)
    Sadie & Rita (Forever in Our Hearts) (the Labbies)

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    3,250
    Thanks for everyone's kind words. I feel some better, though I still feel horrible for having to give her back and causing her more confusion and sadness and more things to have to adjust to. I wanted to be her mommy so much, but I couldn't stand seeing the changes it made in Samantha. The way their "playing" became aggressive so quickly worried me that it would make Lila grow into an aggressive, non-friendly adult and I didn't want that for her. She deserves the best and I just wish with all my heart that it could've been me that provided her with it.

    I miss her already, but the little bugger did leave a legacy... She managed to romp around in the weeds and cover me with poison oak. The right side of my face is so swollen, I can barely see out of my right eye. I've got rashes all down my neck, arms, and legs. I have been absolutely miserable, but I guess I deserved it for giving her up.



  12. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    18,335
    So sorry to hear it didn't work out.
    ~Kimmy, Zam, Logan, Raptor, Nimrod, Mei, Jasper, Esme, & Lucy Inara
    RIP Kia, Chipper, Morla, & June

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