Bogus Dictionary Lands Tourists In Trouble

[aly]

Bogus Dictionary Lands Tourists In Trouble!
Thursday December 4, 2003



A practical joker has stirred up trouble by publishing a Japanese-to-English phrase book with incorrect definitions for every phrase!

Now thousands of Japanese tourists who've painstakingly studied the bogus dictionary in preparation for trips to America are arriving on our shores only to encounter blank stares, hysterical laughter or even brutal beatings as soon as they open their mouths.

"The man who compiled this dictionary clearly went out of his way to wreak havoc," says New York hotel concierge Jacqueline Porseman, who arranges tours for many VIP guests from Japan.

"For instance, when the Japanese think they're asking 'Can you direct me to the rest room?' the book actually has them saying, 'Excuse me, may I caress your buttocks?'

"And, the phrase for 'I am very pleased to meet you' is given as 'My friend, your breath could knock over a water buffalo.'"

At least 50,000 copies of the book have been sold in Japan in the past year and while the Japanese government has pulled the plug on further sales, copies still turn up in used bookstores and bargain-hunters snap them up.

"This is not a funny matter to us," says Hiro Suzuki of the Japanese embassy. "Our citizens who look forward to a pleasurable time in America are being laughed at, spat upon, roughed up and humiliated without knowing what they said wrong. Tourists have been found beaten to a pulp on street corners with this terrible phrase book still in their hands."

Among the nearly 2,300 incidents reported to the embassy:

A 29-year-old Tokyo man visiting San Francisco for the first time meant to ask a female store clerk, "May I please have film for my camera?" But what he actually said was, "Would you place your copious breasts in my mouth?" He was slapped in the face, then got tossed out by the manager.
Four family members from Osaka were thrilled see their favorite American singer coming out of a ritzy store in Beverly Hills. While waving frantically, they shouted out what they believed to be, "We love you so much." Unfortunately, what they really said was, "We're here to take your head." The four were arrested and detained for six hours by police.
A 45-year-old tourist from Okinawa looking for the legendary Apollo Theater in Harlem thought he was asking a group of young men, "I am lost. Which way is uptown?" In reality, he said, "I know martial arts. May I kick your ass?" He was chased five blocks before being rescued by police.
No one knows who's behind the elaborate hoax. Some suspect the editor-publisher of the book, identified only as "M.L. Tanaka," is a disgruntled former Japanese tourism official. Others insist the culprit is a U.S. autoworker who lost his job to Japan in the '80s.

Says Porseman, "If it's an American, I wonder how 'funny' he thinks it would be to visit a Sumo wrestling gym in Tokyo and think he's saying 'You guys are the best, keep it up,' when he's really saying, 'You have fat butts. Sit on my head.'

"It's not so amusing when the shoe is on the other foot, is it?"

http://entertainment.tv.yahoo.com/en...055000003.html

[Cataholic]

Obviously, there is something wrong with me today (maybe everyday), as I couldn't keep from laughing about this.

[aly]

Originally posted by Cataholic
Obviously, there is something wrong with me today (maybe everyday), as I couldn't keep from laughing about this.

me too I can't help it!

Of course its not funny that the people got their feelings hurt, etc. But the phrases are pretty funny.

[2kitties]

also cracking up

[dukedogsmom]

Me too! "copious breasts" Unfortunately, I'll never have that unless I pay a doctor I'm the type that (if someone falls or something similar) I'll laugh first and then ask if you're alright. I can't help it!

[Tonya]

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by aly
A practical joker has stirred up trouble by
publishing a Japanese-to-English phrase book
with incorrect definitions for every phrase!

Must be the Same Guy who writes the "English Version" of
Instruction Manuals for Japanese Products!

[popcornbird]

Originally posted by Cataholic
Obviously, there is something wrong with me today (maybe everyday), as I couldn't keep from laughing about this.

I can't help but laugh either! I know its mean........but its FUNNY! Poor Japanese!

*Imagines a Japanese fresh from Japan coming up to me and saying something silly like that*

I think I would faint!

[tatsxxx11]

Having been a victim myself of such a hoax, I am NOT laughing! My husband is Japanese. We started dating in high school and after a while, it was finally the time for the dreaded first dinner with the family. Adding to the pressure, was the fact that is was to be a dinner party, attended by many of his father's business associates. My husband told me that if I really wanted to impress everyone, especilly his mother, just say "this" at the end of the meal. Well, I practiced the Japanese phrase ad nauseum and finally the BIG moment came. I waited for the applause but all I got was a lot of blank faces and dropped jaws!!!! I think my father in law to be dropped his chopsticks. I know he turned red! After a moment, they all started laughing! His brother whispered to me what I had said. Something along the lines of "Thank you so much for the meal. It tasted like c*r*p." I have NEVER forgiven him for that!

I can appreciate the humor in it, but as it says at the bottom of the article, not so funny when the shoe is on the other foot. And apparently some of these incidents got people into some real hassles and probably ruined a few vacations too. It's especially sad as Japanese tourists are the most polite and coutesous and must be devastated to think they have offended someone so horribly.

It's sounds so "fishy," as most Japanese, especially the type described in the article, speak excellent English and would certainly have consulted another source before making the trip .
I'd think twice before you bite into that next sushi roll

[aly]

It was on Yahoo .. I put the link at the bottom of my post.

Sorry if I offended you Sandra. I ONLY thought the phrases were funny, but I do NOT think it is funny at all when the poor people were put in difficult situations

[tatsxxx11]

No offense taken, Aly!! Like I said, it was funny! And I can certainly relate! You know me, I AM the type that doesn't laugh when someone falls. I try and convince the "victim" it was MY fault! And forgive me, I didn't see the link until later. We all need to laugh at ourselves sometimes! I read the article to Junji and he's laughing his butt off; he would!

[Cataholic]

Sandra,
I don't know what to say. I am sorry you had that experience. NOT a way to be welcomed into the family, at all. It does sound like a silly prank my family would pull, though. I do see the ramifications of it. I suppose it is only funny when no one loses face, eh?

[tatsxxx11]

Not to worry, I've made sure Junji's "lost face" countless times since then, Cataholic! You can't phase that man! He's a perpetual prankster...everyone's fair game! I'm the social conscience of the family! And actually, all of the guests realized that I had been "set up" and thought I was very charming! Since then, they've been my biggest fans!

[Tonya]

When Mike (my husband) first moved to Japan, his ex-girlfriend (Japanese) was a real joker. She taught him how to say "How are you today?" in Japanese. The first time he said it, the person looked at him with a blank stare and Ginko (the gf) fell on the ground laughing. She'd really taught him something that I can't repeat. Basically, he'd asked the man for a sexual favor. lmao.

[tatsxxx11]

Apparently, having a laugh at the expense of another knows no geographical bounds