When you moved out...

[Chinadoll]

Started college at 17, moved out of my Mother's house at 19. I lived at my Grandmothers until I was 22. While at my grandmothers I worked part time and full time( depending on the semester) and went to school. Although I paid all my own bills(credit cards, phone bills, and tuition, books etc..) I didn't consider myself on my own until I got my own apartment at 22.

I still had one semester of college left when I got my own apartment. I was just starting a new full time, better paying job when I moved. I do not reccomend moving when you're just starting a new job and are unsure of your financial situation and job status. The job worked out great, but I didn't know that at the time I moved.

Working full time and going to school was hard. If you can stay at home while in school or have your parents help you with living expenses while in school, it's extremely less stressful.

Even though it was hard that last semester I was in school, it was fun living on my own. Didn't really grocery shop...lived on macaroni and cheese and PB & J. I could keep things the way I wanted them and could clean and vaccuum at 3 am if I wanted to.

I know some people at first live with roommates and that's fine, but I personally don't think anyone should move in with their boyfriend/girlfriend just because they want to live on their *own* and that's the only way they can afford it. I think everyone should experience living on their own and being responsible for themselves before they move in with someone(ie. a boyfriend/girlfriend). It's an amazing freedom. (and this is not putting down those that did move in with their boyfriends/girlfriends for whatever reason when they first moved out) JMO that was what was right for me, not to say that that is the right thing for all, but I still think it's an experience that one should have.

Forgot to add... I had 3 ferrets when I moved into my own apartment. That quickly expanded into 5 ferrets and 3 cats. It may be harder but if you know you want pets, spend that extra time to serach for a good pet friendly place to live.

[2kitties]

For me, and this is just me so I don't want to offend anyone, the most important years are those between parents and significant other. I did the roomate thing, then the solo thing.
Personally, I feel that living on your own- completely- is an important step in life. I respect those who don't, but it was best for me. Also, I would never ever choose a man who had never lived on his own. Nope. I wanna know for sure he can do his own laundry, pay his own bills and clean his own toilets. That's just a big deal to me.

[Chinadoll]

Originally posted by 2kitties
Also, I would never ever choose a man who had never lived on his own. Nope. I wanna know for sure he can do his own laundry, pay his own bills and clean his own toilets. That's just a big deal to me.

Amen. Joey just moved into his own apartment. He was going to earlier but the Marine Corps moved him to Iraq instead. Anywho, he had orginally wanted to move in with me. I know he wanted to because he loves me (he said he knew on our first date he knew he was going to marry me), but I felt he needed the experience of living on his own. I know that after we're married he's going to turn all the bills over to me, but for just a little while I want him to experience and do it himself...that way he won't take it for granted(hopefully!) when I do it and other things around the house when we're married.

[RICHARD]

during one point in my 'travails' I lived in a house with no
fridge or stove....


I used an ice chest to keep stuff cold and when I wanted hot food I heated food on a floor heater...

It was hard but fun.....yes i think people need to struggle a bit to appreciate what they do not have.


I personally would never vacumn at 3 a.m.....I'd be washing dishes or cleaning out a closet!

[Chinadoll]

Originally posted by RICHARD
I personally would never vacumn at 3 a.m.....I'd be washing dishes or cleaning out a closet!

lol...I hate vaccumming, therefore it is the last chore I do when I clean. When I lived in my little apartment(that had no insulation between the walls), vaccumming at 3am was my revenge for the upstairs neighbors who played their music too loud all the time...that and doing the dishes and turning on the garbage diposal early in the morning. Petty, but oh so satisfying.

[neko1]

Wow, I must be in the 1% minority here! Brian and I never had any troubles while living together. It was (and is) a great experience for us. We always help each other out and have done so since the beginning. 7-1/2 years we are together now.
I've never had the "loser boyfriend" thing with him. We always managed to work things out.

I know most people on here think that it's bad to live with your boyfriend when you first move out of your parent's house, but I did it with no problems! (Maybe there's something wrong with us?!)

[Tonya]

I had a nightmare last night about this thread. My son's teacher read my post and thought I was a total loser. I was all upset because she hated me. Sounds lame, but in my dream it was all dramatic. lol.

[popcornbird]

Originally posted by shais_mom
but I chose to go to the local community college about 20 min from home so I just stayed at home. I had it gooooooooooood!!! No rent no car payment no college payment!!! I was/am very very very very lucky. And I have wonderfully awesome parents. I had no reason TO leave!

That's what I plan on doing as well. We have plenty of good colleges/universities near my home. I have no reason to leave. Also, my dad bought my brother a car, and said he's going to buy me one too, so I really won't have anything to pay for. Our dad gets us the cars.

I really have no reason to leave young, nor do I want to. I love my parents, I love my family, and I hate the idea of moving out and living alone, yet putting responsibility on my shoulders. I am soooooooo not living alone. I will learn to live, I will learn responsibility, but I can learn these things while living home. I really have no reason to leave. My brother's 21 and still home........goes to university near home, lives home.....he's happy. I'm a girl, the younger one, the one who's looked after more , and when my parents will get me a car, when I have my nice house to live in WITH my family, and can go to school at the same time, why on earth would I want to leave? No way would I take a little dorm room shared with strange people over the comfort of my home and my family. I'm soooooooooo not moving out. I haven't even thought of it, and my parents wouldn't want it either. They like having their kids home and not having to worry about them.

[All Creatures Great And Small]

I don't think any of the stories told so far could be called "right" or "wrong" options. Sometimes you get what life throws at you, not what you plan or hope for. I lived at home until the day I got married at 22. (I remember that day - I woke up, had a bowl of Raisin Bran as usual, and sat there at the table thinking how freaky it was that I would be eating Raisin Bran in "my own place" tomorrow.) I was working in a low-paying retail job (which I still have, but it pays much better now ) and had dropped out of high school during my senior year, and really had no ambition or plans for life. I was too afraid to look for a roommate and live with someone I barely knew, and I had no friends whom I could move in with. I sure couldn't make it on my own on my single salary. I was paying my mother for a portion of the rent, utilities, and phone, so I wasn't getting a "free ride" all the way. I didn't have a car until just before we got married, when my then-fiance bought me a VERY used one, for which I paid the insurance premiums, gas, etc. I took the bus to work and borrowed mom's car for shopping, and depended on my friends to take me to "fun" places. I didn't want to move in with my boyfriend/fiance before marriage, because I had seen that go bad so many times with girls I knew. I wanted to have some sort of legal recourse if/when he kicked me out, and I wanted concrete tangible evidence of our commitment to each other and to staying together. Once we were married, we had a joint account credit card, but it was used ONLY for unexpected expenses such as car repairs or uncovered medical expenses. (We both had health/dental insurance through our employers, thank goodness.) We just kind of learned how to function in the world by trial and error. One thing that all of you here have going for you is access to the Internet, which we didn't back in the stone age when I was first starting out. You have such a wealth of information available to help you make financial decisions, learn to repair things on your own, you name it. All we had were TV, the Yellow Pages (and our rotary dial phone ) , and the library. Another thing that worked in our favor is that we were both VERY committed to keeping our jobs and staying gainfully employed, no matter how much we hated going to work each day. I know some couples today where one or the other of them won't get a job, or keeps quitting jobs they have for stupid reasons, and causing a lot of financial strain. Basic lesson: WORK STINKS, but you have to deal with it, especially if you're in the position my husband and I are, with neither of us being college-educated and having limited opportunities.

Even though I have never lived "on my own", I am a VERY independent, self-sufficient person, and I function perfectly well when my husband is out of town for extended periods. I run the household completely, I'm in charge of all the finances, I can operate power tools and the lawn mower, so the only thing I "depend" on him for is lifting heavy objects (although I confess I do fall asleep much quicker when I have him as a "bedwarmer" next to me ). So although I may have made some "wrong" choices, it all turned out wonderful, and I'm so happy with my life up to now. (I'm not the kind of person who looks back and laments anyway; it doesn't do anything but make you feel bad.)

[All Creatures Great And Small]

Originally posted by Tonya
I had a nightmare last night about this thread. My son's teacher read my post and thought I was a total loser. I was all upset because she hated me. Sounds lame, but in my dream it was all dramatic. lol.

Ah yes, the psychology of dreams......I don't think that's lame at all, because it obviously means something to you. I find dreams to be really interesting and usually very indicative of something going on in real life. My interpretation of it (and I'm definitely an amateur at interpreting dreams) is that you are worried about setting an example for your son. Your son's teacher represents YOU in the role as a teacher for your son, and her disapproval of your story represents your own disapproval. You were upset because "you/teacher" thought the post made you sound like a loser.

Life is definitely a "learn as you go" experience, and everyone makes mistakes or takes a turn they wish they hadn't. You're not a loser by any means, and you obviously know the value of hard work, education, and financial responsibility, so you'll pass that on to your son. I think being a parent has to be the scariest "learn as you go" experience in life! (I have a 16 year old daughter myself, and it's been a trip )

[Tonya]

Thank you!

[Uabassoon]

For me living in the dorms was a great transition for me, while I don't think I could ever handle living in a dorm room again it was a nice step from living at home to being on my own. Because everything was paid for with my financial aid at the begining of the semester I didn't have to worry about any bills, and when I worked that was all my spending cash. However now when my finanical aid comes I worry that I will spend it all at once, thankfully my parents feel the same way so I give them the money and they send me a little of it every month. I realize that when I'm actually working a real job I won't be getting 6 months salary at once, so by getting money monthly I still have to be able to manage it and make it last an entire month. I have slipped up a few times thinking oh I can spend a lot of money this week and just won't spend as much next week.. but it never seems to work out right. I'm thankful that I have great parents who are willing to help me out on the rare occasion I have to ask for some money to pay the phone bill.

[ILoveMyAbbyGirl]

I have a dilemma. I want to move out really bad, but I don't, ya know? Cuz they said I can't get anymore pets till I move out... So I was like YEAH I'm leaving my senior year, but then money comes into play. I have a job right now, doesn't pay to much, but it's enough, but right now it's being saved for Christmas. I don't know what to do about money for college, I am thinking about waiting a year till I'm 19-20. I need time to get things sorted out and find a way to get enough money to get myself THROUGH college before I even think about going. I'm really nervous, I'm only a freshman and it's been bugging me that I won't have money for college, and I don't want to have to rely on my parents to get me through something that I want to do myself. When I move out, I WANT to go get every pet from the animal shelter, but I highly doubt that... Right away, at least. That's my big plans. Go to college, study to be a veterinarian (I can never spell that right...) and when I finish, and am finally a vet, I want to move out to a farm for starters, and rescue dogs. Then, maybe if the time comes that I have enough money, I want to move onto a ranch of some sort. Yeah, basically I have my whole life planned out.. But honestly, I'm scared about college. I really really am.

[GoldenRetrLuver]

I personally, can't wait to move out. But I know it probably won't be until I'm 20 or 21.
Right after high school I plan to go to College and study to become a veterinarian. When I finish, I hope to be able to open my own rescue center for unwanted/abused Golden Retrievers. When I move out, I will be taking taking Daisy. I really hope College is better then High School, because I HATE it. Way to much stress.
I'm still young, but this is what I have planned out.

[wolfsoul]

My plans are moving out when I'm 17 (BELIEVE ME, I will! lol. Besides, my mom is making me pay rent if I don't), going to the CWCC dog training college in Salmon Arm (which means I'll have to rent a house in Salmon Arm for a while...Ashley will be my roomie, right?!)...Starting out small as a dog trainer possibly in a larger company, like Petcetera. Then start my own training business (Possibly with Jynnelle, and Ashley if she moves here, cuz I don't wanna go to Van!! hehe). When I raise enough money I want to start my own animal shelter, for every kind of animal. I'm hoping that my aunt will stay in her house until then so that I'll be able to rent it. That means moving to Lake Country, which will be great! There is so much farmland there, and my aunt owns a small farm with lots of room for my dogs and my shelter dogs to run around and play. That's my dream.