This was the actual answering machine message for the Pacific Palisades
High School in California. The school and it's teachers were being sued
by parents who wanted their children's failing grades changed to
passing grades, even though those children were absent from school 15 - 30 times during the semester and did not complete enough school work
to pass their classes. This was voted unanimously by the office
staff as the answering machine message for the school :
Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of Pacific
Palisades High School. In order to assist you in connecting to the
right staff member, please listen to all of your options before
making a selection:
To lie about why your child is absent -- Press 1
To make excuses for why your child did not do his or her work -- Press 2
To complain about what we do -- Press 3
To swear at staff members --Press 4
To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your
newsletter and several flyers that were mailed to you --Press 5
If you want us to raise your child -- Press 6
If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -- Press 7
To request another teacher for the third time this year -- Press 8
To complain about bus transportation-- Press 9
To complain about school lunches -- Press 0
If you realize this is the real world and your child must be
accountable and responsible for his or her own behavior, class work,
homework, and that it's not the teacher's fault for your child's lack
of effort, just hang up and have a nice day!"
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